Cat and kitten intro mixed messages

[Margot+Jerry]

Hi
I know there are lots of posts about cat introductions on here already, but I was just hoping for a bit of advice on my specific situation as I am just finding it really hard to interpret my kitties behaviour - any advice much appreciated!
So I have a 2 yr old Maine coon Margot and 12 days ago got a 3 month old kitten - Jerry. I was hopeful they would get on as Margot made friends with the neighbours cat for a while.
We started with the recommended introduction process, him in separate room etc, scent and site swapping, then meeting through a barrier. All that seemed to go reasonably ok, a bit of hissing from Margot if he got a bit over excited and stuck his paw through, generally she seemed quite cautious of him but also curious. Was ok eating either side of gate etc. We let them meet in same room on about day 8, partly because it was becoming impractical to keep them apart as the room we have to keep Jerry in means Margot can’t get upstairs which I don’t think she appreciates, and Jerry was so desperate to get to Margot and was escaping and getting in her room despite our best efforts to catch him. So anyway, we’ve been letting them mix face to face for 15 mins or so at a time, there is quite a lot of staring, tail twitching and growling from Margot and the occasional hiss, but now it’s only if he runs at her or gets too close - which is quite a lot cause he’s so bouncy and desperate to play. On the other hand, ears are always forward, there is the very occasional slow blink and she seems less scared now and more curious, sometimes goes up to him as if she wants to play, she even made her happy trilling noise today as she went towards him, but then she growled when she got to him, which I just don’t get. Also some ‘dabbing’ with paws, but also ending in growling, so not sure if playing or fighting.. can’t see any claws, Jerry often arches his back, but he does that when he’s playing sometimes anyway. At the moment I try to distract them with toys but that’s easier said than done as Margot is not that interested in playing and Jerry just starts trying to join in with her toy and gets too in her face, so then I try to coax him away or pick him up. I reward with treats when they sit calmly near each other.
So wondering if I should slow things down, or jsut let things play out and hope the growling lessens?
Thanks in advance!!

 

[Furballsmom]

Hi!
This sounds pretty good actually I'd let things play out

 

[ArtNJ]

Another vote to let things play out. Adults don't actually hurt kittens, 2 year olds have an excellent chance of befriending a kitten, and even if you wanted too, its really not possible to design and micromanage a process which guarranties they dont have any issues to work through. Sounds like Margot is interested but not sure, and still a bit concerned. Thats all fine -- she needs some time with the kitten to realize the kitten can be a fun little playmate. Let them work it out.

If Margot starts with heavy charging and swatting, truly aweful sounds, or either shows any signs of problems from extreme stress you can revisit the plan, but otherwise just let them sort things out.

 

[Alldara]

I agree as well! They are learning one another hence the cautiousness and I'm sure the breaks are helpful too for your resident cat.

I'd try wearing kitten out and letting him have a supervised sleep in the main area while you're reading or tv watching also.

Really that's going excellently! Can keep at the play through the gate as well if your resident cat is more willing to sniff this way.

 

[Margot+Jerry]

Hi,

Thank you all for your replies! I took the general advice and have been letting them be, trying not to interfere too much but keeping sessions short. This morning there was no hissing or growling at all (with the distraction of breakfast..) so things definitely seem to be progressing in the right direction!
Thanks again.

 

[Furballsmom]