I adopted 3-yr-old male, Dodger, last October. (Long story--he showed up at my house and his previous owner didn't want him back.) My older male cat, Daryl, was not at all happy with this needy intruder. I did all of the introductory things and gated Dodger upstairs. Gradually I started letting Dodger come downstairs in the evenings when I could supervise. Still, the second I left the room, Daryl would seek him out and try to attack him. Daryl looked sulky and unhappy all the time. Dodger was so fearful that he became skittish. I hated seeing what it was doing to both of them. After 4 months of this and no progress, I was beginning to think that re-homing Dodger might be the best thing for both of them.
Then Dodger had some health issues and was recently diagnosed with diabetes. Re-homing is out of the question now. I could never do that. Oddly, from this point forward, Daryl has suddenly stopped being aggressive towards Dodger. Coincidence? Who knows! They aren't buddies by any means, but things are getting much better. They both hang out in the kitchen when I'm getting their dinner ready. They lounge in the living room on opposite furniture and there's no animosity. The staring contests and flattened ears have gone away. I never thought we'd ever get to this point.
My only concern is that Daryl looks a bit defeated, as if he's given up the fight and isn't happy about it. I'm trying to give him extra attention to assure him that he's still my big baby cat. Dodger tends to demand extra attention because of his intense and needy personality, plus the whole diabetes regimen. I feel like Daryl is still jealous and a bit depressed.
Is it possible they can actually become buddies some day? Maybe not cuddly and grooming each other, but to coexist in the same cat condo or on the same couch? I still gate Dodger upstairs when I'm at work, and I hope I can quit doing that someday. I want them to like each other, at least a little. I know it's only been 4+ months, but I need some hope that it will get better. Are there any success stories that started out similar to mine and ended well?
Then Dodger had some health issues and was recently diagnosed with diabetes. Re-homing is out of the question now. I could never do that. Oddly, from this point forward, Daryl has suddenly stopped being aggressive towards Dodger. Coincidence? Who knows! They aren't buddies by any means, but things are getting much better. They both hang out in the kitchen when I'm getting their dinner ready. They lounge in the living room on opposite furniture and there's no animosity. The staring contests and flattened ears have gone away. I never thought we'd ever get to this point.
My only concern is that Daryl looks a bit defeated, as if he's given up the fight and isn't happy about it. I'm trying to give him extra attention to assure him that he's still my big baby cat. Dodger tends to demand extra attention because of his intense and needy personality, plus the whole diabetes regimen. I feel like Daryl is still jealous and a bit depressed.
Is it possible they can actually become buddies some day? Maybe not cuddly and grooming each other, but to coexist in the same cat condo or on the same couch? I still gate Dodger upstairs when I'm at work, and I hope I can quit doing that someday. I want them to like each other, at least a little. I know it's only been 4+ months, but I need some hope that it will get better. Are there any success stories that started out similar to mine and ended well?
