Bully Cat Vs Scaredy Cat

miss ellie · Nov 2, 2018

Hi - not been on here for a long time but I need some help please......

About 7 years ago we rescued two kittens that had been abandoned by some delightful human at about 3 weeks old. Both were extremely frightened of humans but over the years have learnt to trust a little. Roxie is much braver than Lucy but both will run and hide at the sight or sound of anyone visiting. Things jogged along quite nicely until a stray cat made it's home in our hay shed last November. We decided to adopt him but no sooner had he (Buster) got his feet under the table then another stray (Woody) turned up so we adopted him as well which brought our family of cats up to 6. After the initial settling in period, everyone was fine except for Roxie and Lucy who were terrified and would run as soon as either Buster or Woody looked at them. Having had cats all my life, I hoped things would eventually settle down and to some extent it has with Roxie but Lucy will still run and hide under the settee as soon as Buster or Woody look at her and she won't come out unless she's sure they are not indoors any more. The strange thing is though she will join all the cats in the kitchen at feed time but will make her escape as soon as she thinks Buster or Woody have finished their food. Because the two boys are much younger than the girls, I'm sure they just think it's all a game and whilst Buster doesn't seem to take much notice now, Woody will go after either one of them at every opportunity, especially Lucy; it's almost like she has "chase me, I'm a victim" on her forehead! I have tried everything I know of to try and stop the chaos but as much as I don't want to, it's coming to the stage where I am seriously thinking of trying to rehome Woody (nigh on impossible here in Ireland) as I feel so sorry for Lucy who currently spends her life under the settee. By the way, we have a large house with litter trays all over the place and plenty of high places and room for everyone to have their own space.

So that's my predicament! Has anyone been in the same situation? If so, what did you do? Any advice would be gratefully appreciated.

Thanks.

FeebysOwner · Nov 2, 2018

Hi. I personally don't have any tips - no experience with your situation. But, it might mean starting over again at some level and re-introducing Woody, and perhaps Buster as well, to Lucy and Roxie. You didn't mention the other two cats, so I have no idea which of the above named 'twosomes' get along with the other two that weren't mentioned.

I hate to see posts on here that don't at least get some sort of acknowledgement shortly after the initial post - just so they feel as if somebody is paying attention - that is essentially why I wanted to at least say "Hi".

I hope one of the staff or others in this site will come along soon and share articles that discuss both angles - getting Lucy to be more confident and making Woody understand that he needs to leave her alone.

miss ellie · Nov 3, 2018

Thank you FeebysOwner for your reply. Our other two cats, Alfie and MissEllie tend to get on with everyone by keeping themselves to themselves and if the two young boys dare to go near them they soon tell them off and the boys will slink away. You are quite right in saying that I need advice on how to get Lucy to be more confident and how to make Woody understand that he must leave her alone but I have exhausted all ideas on how to achieve that. Incidentally, when Roxie was about Woody's age (1 year old) I seem to remember her making MissEllie's life a living nightmare in the same way. At that time I tried everything from Feliway to Bachs Remedies but nothing worked, except time. Perhaps that's all I can give it.

Thanks once again for saying "Hi"

FeebysOwner · Nov 3, 2018

Time just may be the answer. Too bad you can't tell Lucy to copy-cat (no pun intended) Alfie and MissEllie - they seem to have figured out how to put those boys in their place! Even a little bit of Roxie rubbing off on Lucy would be of some help!

I don't know if there is anything in these articles that you haven't already read, but take a look and see. (The second articles about bully cats - I am not saying Woody is actually a bully, but does display a little bit of bullying behavior toward Lucy, and Roxie.)

Building a cat’s confidence – Way of Cats blog
The Best Ways to Stop a Cat From Being a Bully

di and bob · Nov 3, 2018

It took over year fro my blended family to finally get along. My 'fraidy' cat slept on top the fridge for a year, I even had to put her a bed up there. She finally got bullied one too many times and took the bully.It was smooth sailing since then! i really think your little one will eventually stand up to the bully, don't force her, she needs to build up her confidence. Make sure she has her safe place where ever that is and try to feed them all together to give off good vibes. Even if it means shoving hers under the settee and feeding the rest near by. Now it is at the point I just have to yell the bully's name and he slinks off. He still tries 4 years later!