Brought to my Knees

[furmum]

What a beautiful, moving tribute to a loved furbaby! If I stood up now I'd be standing in a pool of tears. I lost my beloved Sheba 18 months ago almost, and I still shed buckets and buckets of tears for her. I simply miss her so very much. She occupied a place in my heart that no-one or nothing can fill. I feel your pain.

Maggie in Western Australia

 

[batgirl2good]

Ther are tears rolling down my face now, and I am so sorry for your great loss.
Yhe other cats will comfort you, but you will always remember your darling.
I am praying for all of you. Bobbie

 

[luvmy4cats]

Ending Sylvester's suffering was your last gift to him. He was in pain and suffering and you helped him pass on to a better place. I know exactly how you feel right now. You feel like your heart has just been ripped out and that you'll never get over it. In time your heart will heal though. Someday your memories of him will bring a smile to your face instead of tears. Two years ago we lost our 18+ year old cat to old age. Even though she lived a much longer life than most cats do, I still was not ready to let her go. She could have lived another 18 years and I still wouldn't have been ready to let her go. We got her when she was 6 weeks old (about a month after we got married). She was our first "baby". We went on to have two "human" children who loved her dearly. She took a special liking to my second child (my daughter). She started sleeping at the foot of Lindsay's bed every night as soon as she was old enough to sleep in a big bed. She did this every night for 11 years (up until the night before she died). I remember the night she died my daughter literally cried herself to sleep. She said, "Mommy, I can't sleep without her, because I've never slept without her for my whole life". I have pictures of her with both of my children when they were babies that I get out and look at every so often. I remember when she died my co-workers at the time (who were not pet owners) thought I was crazy. I was so upset about her death that I called in sick the day she died to stay home and comfort my kids (who were 11 and 14 at the time and had never dealt with death of any kind before). It really helps to be able to come to a site like this and talk to people who understand exactly what you're going through. Two years ago when I was going through this I didn't know there were groups like this to offer support. I think it would have helped me heal faster if I had been able to talk to other pet owners about it. I felt like I couldn't talk to my friends or family because their feelings were "it was just a cat". Even my husband thought I was a little crazy. I remember him saying, "It's not like a family member died or something". I told him no, she wasn't a human, but she was part of our family. She was a living breathing soul that I had spent every day of the last 18+ years with. I told him as harsh as this sounds, if one of my distant relatives (that I see only once a year) died I would feel bad, but my heart would not feel like it had just been broken in two.

 

[big-cat-fan]

I am sure of the fact that there is nothing I can say that will make things better for you "right now".

But "his story" that you wrote of him today is so special. And I beleive it is your 1st step into your mourning Sylvester.

I must say those big, bold, beautiful blue eyes were hypnotizing!!

He was a beautiful creature that (though shorter than you wanted) finished his life here that was so full of purpose. To teach you a new kind of love!!
Don't you think? And that, you will carry in your heart forever. He was taken from you physically, but the love he taught you and the love he shared with you can never be taken away.

And it IS ok to cry.

 

[AbbysMom]

I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my kitty in November and understand your pain of going to the vet's for the last time. It sounds like you were a very special Dad to Sylvester and you did do the right thing for him no matter how hard it was. You put his pain before your own needs. Your pain will never completely go away, but will slowly be replaced by the happy memories you can hold close to your heart.

 

[whisky'sdad]

The little furballs crawl right into your heart, don't they? I've had my Whiskey now for 10 1/2 years. He's turning 12 next month. When I first got him, I was neither a dog or a cat person. We had a family dog from 1982 to 1994 and I got Whiskey in Dec. 1994. I don't know what I would do without him. Since I have become a cat "nut", I've been reading stories of guys who didn't like, didn't care for or disliked cats, becoming a cat person and they are inseperable.

The pain does ease a little. I still shed a tear when I think about our family dog.

Sylvester will be waiting for you...

 

[wellingtoncats]

I'm sorry to hear of your loss!

 

[talbert]

Hello everyone,

I just wanted to stop by and say thank you for all the kind words. Tomorrow will be 1 week and while I still miss him very much, I am dealing with it better. I've had some real up's and down's these past few days. One minute I'm happy and the next I'm sad. You know how it goes. The house doesn't feel the same anyone. It's going to take some getting used to.

I'm still upset over whether it was the right time or if that's what he wanted. I suppose it was, but what if I was wrong? I guess I just need to let it go. Thanks for everything though. It was nice to let it out.

 

[carolcat]

Originally Posted by talbert

Hello everyone,

I just wanted to stop by and say thank you for all the kind words. Tomorrow will be 1 week and while I still miss him very much, I am dealing with it better. I've had some real up's and down's these past few days. One minute I'm happy and the next I'm sad. You know how it goes. The house doesn't feel the same anyone. It's going to take some getting used to.

I'm still upset over whether it was the right time or if that's what he wanted. I suppose it was, but what if I was wrong? I guess I just need to let it go. Thanks for everything though. It was nice to let it out.

Don't beat yourself up, you did the right thing and I think you did it at the right time. Most of us here have been through this and understand how you feel. The decision to stop a loved companion from suffering is a hard but loving choice. You will continue to miss him but in time the pain will fade away somewhat but it will never be totally gone because when you love that deeply it leaves a mark on your heart. He is no longer in pain and is playing happily at the bridge until the time comes for you to be reunited with him. Remember that only his body died, his spirit waits in peace for you. We are here for you whenever you want someone to talk to. Hugs.