Bengal Vs Boyfriend

[Rini]

Hi cat people,

So I'm having an issue. My boyfriend of eight months confessed to me that my Aslan is getting to be too much for him. Bf claims Aslan constantly wakes him up at 4am for food/playtime (he doesn't do this to me), that Aslan mauls him (this is true, he plays very rough sometimes and has sharp claws that I struggle to keep trimmed) and that Aslan is just generally sucking up all the air in the room.

He IS a very high energy cat, but I adore him, and there's no question of me giving him to my parents (as bf suggested one night after finding holes in his clothes).

Bf has been claiming that Aslan needs more space than my studio apartment. But Aslan has 2 cat trees, one by my bed and one near the window, and many, many toys. I do give him as much playtime as I can. He likes to run around, and jump on everything, and I am doubtful more space would make much of a difference in his energy levels.

Aslan also chews on absolutely EVERYTHING, including my blinds, cabinet knobs, edges of anything etc so any good chew toys recommendations would be much appreciated. I have tried a few dental chew toys and while he likes to play fetch with them, he doesn't really chew them.

I have also been considering getting him a large stuffed animal to wrestle with instead of my legs/feet/everything.

There is NO QUESTION of me choosing my boyfriend over my cat. But I'd like to keep them both so any advice would be appreciated.

 

[FeebysOwner]

Hi. How old is Aslan? If he is young he will grow out of it in time - just maybe not on your BF's timeline.

Get the stuffed toy you are talking about. And, look over these chew toys as possibilities: 10 Cat Chew Toys - Toy Pet Reviews

You can start to work with him about the clawing, also. Maybe something in these articles can help?
The Dos And Don'ts Of Cat Behavior Modification
Solving Cat Behavior Problems: The Key Ingredient

You can also install wall shelving that would serve as perches, just for some more vertical space.

Personally speaking, your BF does not like this cat - or maybe any cats - and Aslan will also pick up on that. If you have to choose - go with Aslan (sorry).

 

[She's a witch]

Bengals are sociable cats and need a lot of interaction. My suggestion would be to get another cat so that Aslan has a playmate and hopefully will leave your boyfriend alone. But this could backfire and your bf could end up with two cats that he doesn’t like
I understand that your bf may struggle but personally, I don’t like him for even giving you an idea of abandoning your friend. I would rehome your bf if it were me

 

[Talien]

Bengals are sociable cats and need a lot of interaction. My suggestion would be to get another cat so that Aslan has a playmate and hopefully will leave your boyfriend alone. But this could backfire and your bf could end up with two cats that he doesn’t like
I understand that your bf may struggle but personally, I don’t like him for even giving you an idea of abandoning your friend. I would rehome your bf if it were me

This would be my suggestion as well. If he's still fairly young then getting another young Cat would most likely cut down on unwanted behavior. They will keep eachother occupied by playing and burn off a lot of that excess energy that is otherwise going toward chewing on things they shouldn't be chewing on or attacking people.

If another Cat isn't an option then a larger stuffed toy that he can wrestle with would probably be your next best bet.

 

[Etarre]

Do you give him lots and lots of playtime to tire him out? Training him to walk on a leash and taking him out and about could be another way to use up some of that energy. Does he have a window perch and lots of things to climb? Have you tried kitty TV/You Tube channels?

There's a Jackson Galaxy episode about a Bengal who's an only cat and too frisky for the owner. You might try to dig it up and take a look for further advice. But basically, tiring him out more in various ways is what works on the show.

 

[Ardina]

For chewers, I found that the Tuffy Jr line of dog toys works really well. Saipha used to have severe pica and would chew on everything, including corners of wooden furniture, metal, plastic, etc. The tuffy Jr toys (the small bone is lightweight enough for cats) stood up to a year's worth of chewing, kicking, and mauling, and it's still her favorite toy.

 

[Rini]

Thank you so much everyone!

For the record, bf is very friendly with my cat (he would not still be around otherwise) and Aslan really likes him. I have several cute pictures of Aslan licking my boyfriend's hair from the back of the couch.

I wish I could get another cat, but my apartment has a strict limit of 1 (Aslan is an emotional support cat, I had to get special permission as is).

I am moving next year so maybe then I will look into it!

And for everyone asking, he's about 20 months old.

 

[kittyluv387]

Why in the world would you choose your bf of a mere 8 months over a life companion (your cat)? Your bf may or may not be with you forever. Men come and go. But your cat will be with you forever if he could. My cats come first, period.

Now, that doesn't mean nothing should be done. A studio could be really small for a high energy cat, even if he has vertical space and play time with you. Could you and your bf get a bigger place together? Ideally, you guys would have a bigger place together and you could get Aslan another high energy cat to play with. And you guys would be able to shut the door on them during bedtime so your bf could get proper sleep.

 

[amethyst]

I agree Bengals are a very high energy and tend to be very needy cats, they don't do well left alone (from what I saw of my mom's Bengal mix). They are very dog like in that respect, they need either a playmate or a human willing to play with them a lot or they will find their own entertainment.

Living in a small apartment is not an issue, just think "up" instead of floor space. I would go with lots of cat shelves and cat walks along the ceiling if you can. If you google cat shelves you will come up with tons of examples. Basically turn the empty areas of the walls into cat territory. Even something as simple as https://i.pinimg.com/736x/aa/e2/5e/...c--cat-climbing-shelves-cat-climbing-wall.jpg can really increase at cat's area. If you are renting and can't put hole in the wall you could even make things like https://i.pinimg.com/236x/48/f5/61/48f5619f48928ad2cb2e06f865d157bc--cat-shelves-book-shelves.jpg out of a bookshelf.

Stuffed animal can be a good option for when the cat attacks. When he is in attack mode redirect him to the toy instead. I would try something similar size to him, my cats also like those Kickaroo toys.

 

[kittyluv387]

I agree Bengals are a very high energy and tend to be very needy cats, they don't do well left alone (from what I saw of my mom's Bengal mix). They are very dog like in that respect, they need either a playmate or a human willing to play with them a lot or they will find their own entertainment.

Living in a small apartment is not an issue, just think "up" instead of floor space. I would go with lots of cat shelves and cat walks along the ceiling if you can. If you google cat shelves you will come up with tons of examples. Basically turn the empty areas of the walls into cat territory. Even something as simple as https://i.pinimg.com/736x/aa/e2/5e/...c--cat-climbing-shelves-cat-climbing-wall.jpg can really increase at cat's area. If you are renting and can't put hole in the wall you could even make things like https://i.pinimg.com/236x/48/f5/61/48f5619f48928ad2cb2e06f865d157bc--cat-shelves-book-shelves.jpg out of a bookshelf.

Stuffed animal can be a good option for when the cat attacks. When he is in attack mode redirect him to the toy instead. I would try something similar size to him, my cats also like those Kickaroo toys.

It's different for some cats. My cats love running around going crazy in our spacious floorplan. I can't imagine them liking a studio just as much. They have vertical space but aren't as keen on it. They can't exactly do laps on a cat tree.

 

[lutece]

I like the idea of a stuffed animal to wrestle.

Have you thought about a cat-sized exercise wheel? Some people swear by them for their high energy Bengals.

 

[Rini]

kittyluv387 I would never choose a guy over Aslan. But I do try to be considerate of my house guests, and Aslan isn't always the easiest. My apartment is small but it's not one level, I have a raised platform with a few stairs and a built in book shelf/dresser area, and a pretty spacious bathtub that he loves to play in. Floor to ceiling 9 foot closet with a bunch of racks for him to sleep on (and shoes to wrestle). He has a dozen hiding places at least, including the storage space underneath the sleeping platform. I honestly think space wise, he's happy. I'll gladly give him more when I can afford to, rent in my city is quite insane. My first thought when I moved into my studio is "wow, a cat would have a field day with all of these nooks and crannies".

amethyst those toys looks amazing! I am ordering one for him right now! If I can get him to bunny kick anything other than my arm I will be overjoyed!

lutece I don't know if I have the space for a wheel. Is it collapsible?

 

[lutece]

Cat sized wheels are pretty big... I don't have a wheel (or a Bengal) myself, I have just heard that they are popular with Bengal owners. Here is a video off youtube.

 

[Hellenww]

Since Asian is waking your bf I'd say he likes him. If your bf gets up and feeds him the first thing to do is ignore Asian until it's a proper breakfast time. It will take consistency and I'd bet Asian will show his displeasure.

Asian need new ways to play rough and tumble with no human body parts involved. A big infant safe stuffed animal is a great idea. How about a throw blanket to wrestle through, or pull Asian around while he's on it. A thick rope with some knots in it. Is it safe to harness train and go for walks?

 

[danteshuman]

Pick the cat obviously

Besides taking him for walks I think you should look at how you can catify your apartment. Maybe your bf & you can build lots of sturdy cat shelves for Aslan? Bengals love to climb and perch up high. Jackson Galaxy did a few shows on Bengals and catifying for bengals. Also can you buy and securely install a window catio in your apartment (if permitted in your lease.) Don’t forgot to start giving him food puzzles you rotate plus clicker training him to go through obstacle courses you create. They say a bored Bengal destroys your house.

I never owned a Bengal but my hyper cat taught me you need to wear them out mentally and physically! Now my new hyper teen kitten is a PITA whenever he gets hungry or bored. Every afternoon or evening he gets outside time. He has a 26foot leash that I attach to my patio chair and let him explore/hunt birds in my communal yard. (it hurts to walk/stand.) So I read for an hour (and untangle his leash) and he gets his outside time. Your bengal might benefit from that leash time to just hunt things; along with walks around your neighborhood. Some people takes their Bengals hiking! Oh and I have bird feeders to attract some entertainment for my cat. I’m trying to figure out how to sneak a squirrel feeder in the tree/Bush hedge to attract the squirrels in for him Also he likes cat tv (he gets it on rainy days.)

 

[Rini]

Thanks! I do have a harness for him, but I don't have private outdoor space so I can only take him to the park when it's warm. He also has a stroller for outside time which he likes.

 

[danteshuman]

You could walk him in his harness and/or take him in the stroller to the park and then let him roam a bit on the leash (just watch his tree climbing since they love to climb.) Have fun!

 

[5starcathotel]

Since Asian is waking your bf I'd say he likes him. If your bf gets up and feeds him the first thing to do is ignore Asian until it's a proper breakfast time. It will take consistency and I'd bet Asian will show his displeasure.

Exactly this. If BF has taught Aslan that, if he is annoyed enough, he will get up and give Aslan food....he needs to teach Aslan that he is not the 4am food source! Breakfast is only after you or BF get awake at a normal hour, and maybe even not until you have brushed your teeth, taken a shower, exercised, etc.

It will be painful for a few weeks, but consistency is *everything* with energetic / demanding cats!