Are all cats much less happy when they grow up?

[Renne]

My cat used to be such a happy kitten. Her eyes would lit up with happiness! Her whole body language would be that of being happy. Especially after playing.

Now she's grown and I haven't seen her eyes lit up with happiness since she was a kitten Her sleeping form is very relaxed and pleased, that's one thing she has, but her body language awake is that of a very relaxed cat, not of a happy cat...

I wonder if she's unhappy from boredom of being a home cat. That said, I've seen many other adult cats in my life, but none of them looked as exaltedly happy as mine did as a kitten. So maybe that's normal that cats aren't very happy when grown up? Sometimes she even looks sad. Or bored, I can't tell.

 

[Margot Lane]

How grown up IS your kitty? Cats can be extremely subtle in their expressions. Also, of course, as with any young thing there is so much boundless energy. Does she have stimulation of any sort, whether cat tree, toys or window? Also after age 2, every year of a human‘s life equals 4 years in a cat’s. So, depending, happiness can be more…contentment. I’d say if your cat looks relaxed, that’s actually a good sign. But I do have to say, after reading so many TCS threads, a lot of kitties seem even more happy with…another kitty!

 

[gilmargl]

Kittens are babies and I'm sure you've noticed how human babies get really excited about washing on a line blowing in the wind, trees against a blue sky, colorful balloons etc. A few years later these simple things are taken for granted, the baby grows up and becomes less excitable and settles down. Happiness does not come into it. I have had so many playful kittens and, if playful can be equated with happy, they all developed into more serious, less happy adults. Even "play" is a serious business for adults - both for humans and cats!

 

[Renne]

How grown up IS your kitty? Cats can be extremely subtle in their expressions. Also, of course, as with any young thing there is so much boundless energy. Does she have stimulation of any sort, whether cat tree, toys or window? Also after age 2, every year of a human‘s life equals 4 years in a cat’s. So, depending, happiness can be more…contentment. I’d say if your cat looks relaxed, that’s actually a good sign. But I do have to say, after reading so many TCS threads, a lot of kitties seem even more happy with…another kitty!

She's 3.5 y.o., and she has windows as her best-liked hobby. I live on the 5th floor, a lot of birds fly around, some use tree branches to sit on, and some walk on the balcony. She bird-watches a lot and she loves it. I also play with her myself, although it's tricky and difficult: she loses interest in my games real fast. Apparently I suck, haha, although as a kitten she could play with me for hours, so I know it's not my fault. As for toys, she has no interest in them at all, unless I actively play with her using those toys.

As for another kitty, I considered it before, but now it's too late, she's so old now that she probably won't be able to accept another cat. She's also very afraid of other cats, she hisses at them and hides. I accidentally checked that when a stray cat ran into my apartment (hoping to find a new home, I guess, but she left on her own after being hissed at). And what will I do if they don't get along, kick another cat out or have them fight and be stressed every day? I'd rather not take a risk.

I think she'd love to go for a walk, she often claws at windows as if asking to hunt the birds rather than bird-watch. So she'd love to hunt outside, even if it's just flies and other insects! But I live on the 5th floor and we have an electronic lock on the main building door, plus of course it's dangerous outside: cars, dogs, even other cats she's so afraid of, as well as other humans she's afraid of even more! I suppose I could use a collar and walk her myself? Everyone I talked to about it said it was a bad idea. And I know she'd be very scared and stressed, at least at first. But maybe she could get used to being outside?

I have had so many playful kittens and, if playful can be equated with happy, they all developed into more serious, less happy adults.

I don't really know if happiness can be equated with being very playful. For cats... maybe? It's obvious that they enjoy nothing more than a play-hunt. So perhaps being extremely playful is the main (or only) source of happiness for cats.

But I'd say the two are still kind of separate states. I could see when she was happy as a kitten thanks to her eye expression and body language. She'd randomly look at me and I could immediately see that she felt really good, optimistic, joyful, innocent\childish. It was all distinctly reflected by her expressive eyes. But there's no optimistic or joyful expression these days. At best, she looks innocent and childish, it's the only kitten-expression that she's kept. But otherwise, she just looks serious now. My friend says about that look that she looks 'smart'. So it's either innocent\childish (only when I talk to her, maybe she thinks of me as a mother and feels like a kitten?) or serious\smart. Plus when she plays or gets excited she looks alert and excited. But she doesn't look happy, just excited.

I suspect it's boring life for her now. She's no longer as super excitable as she was when she was a kitten. She was like an endless ball of energy and played for hours and hours even well into her 2nd year, before she started to lose interest in toys. Now I play with her for 1 min and she loses interest, then comes back to me after 5 mins to bug me to play with her again. Then loses interest in 1 min, rinse and repeat. She obviously wants to play, but all games are boring to her now, and believe me I've tried everything: feather toys, mint, laser toys, all the best-known cat toys. She loved all of that to death as a kitten, now she gets excited but loses interest rapidly.

 

[Alldara]

I wouldn't "get her used to outside". Like you said, too many dangers. Even many more than you listed there.

You CAN bring out outside IN though. Cat grasses, catnip in pots, or even some cat-safe herbs like thyme, rosemary and sage.

All healthy cats will play. Usually, as they get older they are less quick on the jump. Part of their okay then is watching in wait for the best opportunity! But then their human gives up instead....

The best way to get play back again is consistency. Set aside 15 min (twice a day if you can) and play that whole time with the toy no matter what. Even if she's just looking. Do different movements, flying movements, fast movements, slow movements, under and over things. Your cat will increase her playtime again. You've got this!

 

[IndyJones]

If you do decide to bring outside thing indoors shake them down for bugs first. I bought a couple ferns and ended up with some kind of gnats in my house.

 

[maggie101]

She's 3.5 y.o., and she has windows as her best-liked hobby. I live on the 5th floor, a lot of birds fly around, some use tree branches to sit on, and some walk on the balcony. She bird-watches a lot and she loves it. I also play with her myself, although it's tricky and difficult: she loses interest in my games real fast. Apparently I suck, haha, although as a kitten she could play with me for hours, so I know it's not my fault. As for toys, she has no interest in them at all, unless I actively play with her using those toys.

As for another kitty, I considered it before, but now it's too late, she's so old now that she probably won't be able to accept another cat. She's also very afraid of other cats, she hisses at them and hides. I accidentally checked that when a stray cat ran into my apartment (hoping to find a new home, I guess, but she left on her own after being hissed at). And what will I do if they don't get along, kick another cat out or have them fight and be stressed every day? I'd rather not take a risk.

I think she'd love to go for a walk, she often claws at windows as if asking to hunt the birds rather than bird-watch. So she'd love to hunt outside, even if it's just flies and other insects! But I live on the 5th floor and we have an electronic lock on the main building door, plus of course it's dangerous outside: cars, dogs, even other cats she's so afraid of, as well as other humans she's afraid of even more! I suppose I could use a collar and walk her myself? Everyone I talked to about it said it was a bad idea. And I know she'd be very scared and stressed, at least at first. But maybe she could get used to being outside?


I don't really know if happiness can be equated with being very playful. For cats... maybe? It's obvious that they enjoy nothing more than a play-hunt. So perhaps being extremely playful is the main (or only) source of happiness for cats.

But I'd say the two are still kind of separate states. I could see when she was happy as a kitten thanks to her eye expression and body language. She'd randomly look at me and I could immediately see that she felt really good, optimistic, joyful, innocent\childish. It was all distinctly reflected by her expressive eyes. But there's no optimistic or joyful expression these days. At best, she looks innocent and childish, it's the only kitten-expression that she's kept. But otherwise, she just looks serious now. My friend says about that look that she looks 'smart'. So it's either innocent\childish (only when I talk to her, maybe she thinks of me as a mother and feels like a kitten?) or serious\smart. Plus when she plays or gets excited she looks alert and excited. But she doesn't look happy, just excited.

I suspect it's boring life for her now. She's no longer as super excitable as she was when she was a kitten. She was like an endless ball of energy and played for hours and hours even well into her 2nd year, before she started to lose interest in toys. Now I play with her for 1 min and she loses interest, then comes back to me after 5 mins to bug me to play with her again. Then loses interest in 1 min, rinse and repeat. She obviously wants to play, but all games are boring to her now, and believe me I've tried everything: feather toys, mint, laser toys, all the best-known cat toys. She loved all of that to death as a kitten, now she gets excited but loses interest rapidly.

If you have had since she was a kitten and never let her outside it is very possible she will not want to be outside, which is great,. Is your house catified? Wand toys,chew toys, brush her. What makes you think she is unhappy? Does she walk with her tail strait up?

 

[maggie101]

An adult cat in the wild has a big breakfast,sleeps,mid day snack,sleep,big dinner. Doesn't eat her meal at once. Goes back 2 more times. For toys,wand toys with a mouse attachment and cubes to hide. They like to hunt. No more electronic toys. They like to hunt. Hard too do with a feather toy like da bird. Move it fast on the ground. Also,purrfect leather bouncer

 

[lunch]

Just curious for more info -- besides the two modes you described: bored and relaxed/sleepy what other behaviors does she show? Does she seek out your company? Does she likes petting? Is she a lap cat? A loner? Does she get active around meal time? Or is she free fed?

3.5 years old is hardly old, so I'd like to get a more comprehensive picture of her "emotional range" so to speak. Can you fill us in on her routines more?

 

[Renne]

Is your house catified? Wand toys,chew toys, brush her. What makes you think she is unhappy? Does she walk with her tail strait up?

It's not as catified as I'd prefer, but I do my best. She has many toys she pays no attention to, so the only catification that matters to her is her various high resting spots. She loves them.

I don't believe she's extremely unhappy, but she used to be sooooo happy as a kitten! I wish she didn't lose that.

And yes she does walk with her tail straight up! Always! It's one of her most notable features, my previous cat did that very rarely, but for this one it's always like that, unless she's scared of something or stressed or something else out of the ordinary has happened. As a kitten she always walked with her tail up, too, but there was more to her than that. She had such a spring in her step, such joy in her eyes. She was like the happiest kitten in the world.

Just curious for more info -- besides the two modes you described: bored and relaxed/sleepy what other behaviors does she show? Does she seek out your company? Does she likes petting? Is she a lap cat? A loner? Does she get active around meal time? Or is she free fed?

She's a grumpy young lady who hates being petted and hates laps even more . In fact, she often... flexes her skin on her back? I don't know how to describe it, but you know how cats sometimes express disgust? It's a very frequent body language expression for her. She gets disgusted with many random insignificant things, like a mop Or when I try to pet her... She does that skin-flexing cat trick a lot.

She's also a very scaredy cat and is afraid of humans (that don't belong to our family) most of all. She hisses and hides from them. She always walks very carefully so that she doesn't accidentally push something or step on something, I've never seen that in a cat before. If she dislikes a material something is made of, she is always careful to walk around or jump over it, so that she never ever happens to step on it. I think her touch sense might be oversensitive, that can explain why she's so picky about stepping on something she doesn't like and why she doesn't like being petted or touched.

Regardless of her aloof character, she nearly always leaves the room when I walk out to follow me, and she does show many signs of joy when I wake up or come home. At such times she even asks to be petted (for a short time) and wants to lick my hair. And although she dislikes lap-sitting, she tolerates it for about half a minute for me, because I like it.

Also regardless of her aloof character, she has that naive childish look she often gives me. Just like a kitten. She stares at me like she's the purest creature in the world who was only born yesterday. Classical grumpy cats don't do that. Her 'normal' expression is smart, others say, and indeed she looks alert and intelligent. When she wants to play she comes 'alive' and looks almost crazy, it's hard to describe, but in comparison to other adult cats in hunt-mode, she looks a lot more excited than them. I don't think she has other regular expressions, they're all connected to rare strong emotions (like being scared). Unless being drowsy is an expression of its own.

She's free fed and she has no idea how to ask for food. She'd never meowed for her first 3 years (other than yelp from pain once or twice, so I knew she had a voice), but later she realized that meowing is a convenient way to express her wish to play. Before that, she'd walk up to me and touch me lightly with her paw to ask for playtime. Now I wish she still did that, it was the only time she was walling to touch me on her own. Now she just meows, often in another room, because she knows I have good hearing and expects me to come to her.

 

[JamesCalifornia]

~ When I notice one of my cats moping I fuss over them more. They like their human to pay attention to them.

 

[maggie101]

It's not as catified as I'd prefer, but I do my best. She has many toys she pays no attention to, so the only catification that matters to her is her various high resting spots. She loves them.

I don't believe she's extremely unhappy, but she used to be sooooo happy as a kitten! I wish she didn't lose that.

And yes she does walk with her tail straight up! Always! It's one of her most notable features, my previous cat did that very rarely, but for this one it's always like that, unless she's scared of something or stressed or something else out of the ordinary has happened. As a kitten she always walked with her tail up, too, but there was more to her than that. She had such a spring in her step, such joy in her eyes. She was like the happiest kitten in the world.


She's a grumpy young lady who hates being petted and hates laps even more . In fact, she often... flexes her skin on her back? I don't know how to describe it, but you know how cats sometimes express disgust? It's a very frequent body language expression for her. She gets disgusted with many random insignificant things, like a mop Or when I try to pet her... She does that skin-flexing cat trick a lot.

She's also a very scaredy cat and is afraid of humans (that don't belong to our family) most of all. She hisses and hides from them. She always walks very carefully so that she doesn't accidentally push something or step on something, I've never seen that in a cat before. If she dislikes a material something is made of, she is always careful to walk around or jump over it, so that she never ever happens to step on it. I think her touch sense might be oversensitive, that can explain why she's so picky about stepping on something she doesn't like and why she doesn't like being petted or touched.

Regardless of her aloof character, she nearly always leaves the room when I walk out to follow me, and she does show many signs of joy when I wake up or come home. At such times she even asks to be petted (for a short time) and wants to lick my hair. And although she dislikes lap-sitting, she tolerates it for about half a minute for me, because I like it.

Also regardless of her aloof character, she has that naive childish look she often gives me. Just like a kitten. She stares at me like she's the purest creature in the world who was only born yesterday. Classical grumpy cats don't do that. Her 'normal' expression is smart, others say, and indeed she looks alert and intelligent. When she wants to play she comes 'alive' and looks almost crazy, it's hard to describe, but in comparison to other adult cats in hunt-mode, she looks a lot more excited than them. I don't think she has othe
gular expressions, they're all connected to rare strong emotions (like being scared). Unless being drowsy is an expression of its own.

She's free fed and she has no idea how to ask for food. She'd never meowed for her first 3 years (other than yelp from pain once or twice, so I knew she had a voice), but later she realized that meowing is a convenient way to express her wish to play. Before that, she'd walk up to me and touch me lightly with her paw to ask for playtime. Now I wish she still did that, it was the only time she was walling to touch me on her own. Now she just meows, often in another room, because she knows I have good hearing and expects me to come to her.

~ When I notice one of my cats moping I fuss over them more. They like their human to pay attention to them.

Sounds just like my cat peaches. She plays when she wants to play when she's usually by herself. She is also not a lap cat easily scared. She is queen. As a kitten I played with her alot

 

[Alldara]

Renne Cats don't really play on their own much.

We did find that using a small bin and splitting their toys into 3 groups we can rotate the toys. We cat catnip to the stored groups and pop the new group into the freezer for 30 minutes to activate the catnip well.

They get excited over toy change day and enjoy re-exploring new things. I also try to "hide" toys on them so it surprises them and encourages play.

Mostly, their okay sessions come from us and from one another.

 

[neely]

I don't believe she's extremely unhappy, but she used to be sooooo happy as a kitten! I wish she didn't lose that.

As I'm sure you know cats are all individual in their preferences as well as their personalities. Since your girl is no longer a kitten her personality may have changed too but it doesn't necessarily mean she's unhappy. Even human personalities change from childhood to adults. Just out of curiosity, when is the last time she had an exam or bloodwork by your vet? The reason I asked is because maybe she has a health related issue and that's the reason for her being what you mentioned as grumpy.

I thought this Article about different signs that show your cat loves you might have some helpful information for you:
23 Signs That Your Cat Loves You - TheCatSite

 

[Renne]

~ When I notice one of my cats moping I fuss over them more. They like their human to pay attention to them.

Fussing over has an opposite effect on my cat, she becomes annoyed and walks away...

Just out of curiosity, when is the last time she had an exam or bloodwork by your vet? The reason I asked is because maybe she has a health related issue and that's the reason for her being what you mentioned as grumpy.

Our last vet visit happened quite a while ago. I know it's typical to take cats for a check-up once per year, but in my country vets don't really understand what a check-up is. They understand when you come with a problem. If you ask for a general check-up, they look at your strangely and ask: what do you mean? So technically if I want a check-up, I need to make a list of all that I want done to my cat on my own and give it to the vet.

I don't have to get her any yearly vaccine, either, since the only truly serious disease it saves cats from is panleikonepia, and she already has immunity for a lifetime from being sick with it as a kitten. Other two diseases that a general vaccine treats, I was told, aren't worth it on their own, since they aren't lethal and there are as many variants of their respective diseases as there are of flu.

Thanks for the article. I didn't know about love bites Indeed, when she plays with my hands she mostly 'bites' so gently that her teeth touch my skin only barely. I can't even call that biting, it's just 'touching with her teeth'.