Annoyed With Vets

[Santanaddmorgantom]

Hi guys, first post but long time lurker here.

I was at the vet today to get two of my cats desexed and got really ticked off at being judged for owning four cats in an apartment.

I own two bengals and two mixed breeds.

The consultation went like this:

Vet: how many cats do you own:
me: 4
Vet: how many litter boxes do you have?
Me: 2
Vet: how big is your place?
Me: one bedroom apartment
Vet: you are going to have problems with behavior etc. Please let me know if you have any problems down the line(from the actual conversation I could tell she was asking me to let her know in the future if I no longer want my cats)

Obviously the conversation didn't go word by word with what I wrote. But the entire time I felt as if though the vet firmly believed I will not be able to handle the pressure of owning 4 cats in the future and let some of them go.

This conversation really left me a sour impression of this profession and a small minority of the cat owner community . I've seen the same attitude echoed in bengal cat forums. People being judgemental and thinking other people do not have the capacity to take care of their cats because they either have too many or they are of a breed which are less "behaved". An example of this is bengal owners warning others not to get one because they won't be able to handle the "issues" of owning one.

What these people don't understand is that not everyone is looking for a lap cat. Not everyone thinks cats jumping on the kitchen bench is a problem but rather a unique personality trait. Not everyone only plays with their cat once a week.

My four cats are well bonded, they groom, eat, sleep and play together. I love each of my cats to bits. I spend each day playing 30min with them after I finish work at 5. They get fed the best cat food I can find in this country after countless days spent researching each and every brand . I change their litter boxes at least once a week and scoop daily.

Instead of assuming that I'm incapable of raising my kitties and will let them go, it would be more productive to give me advice on how to make it even better for cats in their existing situation.

I guess it's the same feeling you will get if someon said you are incapable of raising your kids so let them know in the future if you are going to give one of them up.

I've already decided to go bck to my original vet who was understanding rather than being a judgemental prick. Majority of vets either push Hills Science diet or uninformed opinions about cat behavior down your throat.

Rant over. This is my message to vets and the cat owner communities.

 

[foxxycat]

sorry you had to deal with an inconsiderate whatever. I think if people used different ways to communicate the message in a different way-maybe people wouldn't get so upset. Personally as long as the cats are healthy and happy who cares if it's only a 1 bedroom apartment?! I say this vet is out of line.

 

[babiesmom5]

First, you are to be applauded for being a very responsible and caring cat owner. Everyone should be like you; unfortunately Vets see too many who are not. I think this is why this Vet had a "knee jerk" response...4 cats, 2 litter boxes in a 1 bedroom apartment...and this Vet, (not knowing you) sensed problems ahead, probably based on experience.

The #1 reason people give up cats to shelters, (or worse) have them put down is "inappropriate elimination"...going outside the litter box. Just look on the "Cat Behavior" forum on this site...on any day there are several pleas for help dealing with litter box issues. People get frustrated. As you know, cats are very territorial by nature. Even among siblings, there are rivalries, territorial disputes which manifest themselves in litter box issues. I have dealt with this issue myself...and have resolved it...and have advised others on several posts in the behavioral section how to do likewise. I could write on this topic everyday, but I would get nothing else done.

Then there is also the issue of breed. As you know, Bengals are an energetic breed and are not for everyone. Fortunately, you know the characteristics of this breed and enjoy them. If only everyone who adopts a Bengal was like you! Unfortunately too many are given up because people think it would be neat to have an "Exotic" not realizing characteristics of the breed. This Vet may have dealt with irresponsible people like this.

Multiple cat households pose many challenges as I can attest...and not everyone is tolerant, understanding, patient, or thinks of their cats as members of their family as you and I do.
How I wish they were!

This being said, I do think this Vet was too quick to react without knowing your background and all the facts. This immediately created a negative impression in your mind which would hamper any future dealings. I really think you must have implicit trust in your Vet because they may be making life or death decisions for your cat. There must be good communications between the both of you as your cats welfare is depending upon it. Just like human doctors, some are good communicators, some are not. I would not stay with a doctor with whom I could not have good communications. I would look elsewhere. Same with a Vet.

Your four cats are lucky indeed to have such a loving, caring parent as you! Now, go out and find them the very best Vet you can find! You...and they deserve it!

 

[Kieka]

I completely 100% understand where you are coming from. I have indoor/outdoor cats and the sheer number of time vets (and even people on this board) have judged me negatively for that is overwhelming. My current vet even gave me a hard time the first time I met her.

I told her the same thing I tell everyone else, these are my cats and my life. Indoor/outdoor works for us and I fully know and appreciate all the risks it entails. I probably spend more on vet care then most, flea medicine, tracking collars, microchip enabled doors, and replacing collars twice a year. I am home every day at dusk to make sure the cats come in so they are in every single night. I take them to the vet more then I see a doctor. Just this past weekend I took Rocket in for a preventative antibiotic shot because she got scratched by a stray. Over the past two year south my vet has come to see that I am hyper vigilant when it comes to my cats health and that I have healthy well cared for cats. So she stopped bringing up the indoor/outdoor as an issue and works with me to keep them healthy. She even called me a few weeks back to let me know the fleas are out in force this year so I should do every three week flea treatment until August.

I don't blame my vet in the least (or many people on here who don't take the time to understand my situation or the level of care I give my cats) for her initial reaction. A lot of people don't go to the levels I do and don't provide proper care to account for the dangers of outside. I have the same knee jerk reaction every time someone on here says that they have a pointed cat or a bengal that is distructive or a cat not using the litter box when they have multiple cats with one box. There have been a few times where you can just tell they got a "pretty cat" expecting it to be your stereotypical lazy Garfield cat.

It sounds like that vet was just concerned about your cats given past experiences and not a reflection directly on you. That vet was worried about your cats wellbeing. Maybe in a few visits the attitude would change. Although, I have had those vets and others who don't care what precautions I take or how my home is. I had one person on these boards tell me I was killing my cats and that they aren't really my cats. That someday they just won't come home because it isn't there home and I am just being used for food. But I ignore them. Because I know my little girl waits for me to get home then follows me around before sleeping every night curled up next to me. I am her family. I am her home. Nothing anyone else says will ever change that.

If I have a vet who truly isn't listening to me and treats my cats poorly because they think I don't care then I completely agree with you. And I have had one who brushed off my concerns and said my cat was fine and it was because he was outside (it was cancer). Those are the prick vets who don't deserve me as their client.

 

[NilsCherch]

Don't listen to them. They don't understand. As long as you are taking care of your cats in the best way you can, that is all that matters. As for vets, it's best to find someone who will listen to you and give you advice instead of putting you down because of how many cats you are taking care of. Yeah, I know they're also concerned that you might not be able to take care of that number of cats, but you've already proven that you are able to do so, right?

 

[kittens mom]

Just don't go back to this veterinarian.
I have been in 3 bedroom homes that have less sq. footage than some of the studio apartments I used to live in. We are all now educated on how to catify our spaces to maximize their living space. Cats are vertical animals you add footage with every tree, shelf or walkway. My cats can travel 100 feet or more in my living room alone without touching the floor and more if you add all the up spaces.
I'm not a fan of breeding wild animals to make domestic pets but owners of hybrids are now aware they are not just like your house cat with a fancy coat and have learned to accommodate their special needs.
If you haven't find a vet that loves, and I mean loves Bengals. I had a horse vet once that wouldn't treat a horse unless they were registered. Just like negative friends and relatives you have to purge people like this veterinarian out of your life. Enjoy and love your cats and if you do have a problem down the line you don't need a judgmental attitude meeting you at the exam room door.

 

[1CatOverTheLine]

.
I hate to agree with the original post, but sadly, it's the prevailing attitude with quite a few veterinarians these days. It took three tries to find my current veterinarian (and now close Friend), and it was, in part, owed to this attitude. I suspect that it can, in part measure, at least, be attributed to the fact that veterinarians do see quite a bit of irresponsible behaviour in our community, and they doubtless likewise see far too many owners who simply haven't the resources when faced with major health problems (in this respect, many U.K. cats owners are miles ahead because of the prevalence of Pet Health Insurance there).

I'm currently a ten cat household (though with sufficient room that if they didn't choose to sleep in a three square foot pile, each cat could have his or her own bedroom), and it took a little time (and cultivation) to find a vet willing to take the time to understand his clients. My current vet "gets it" - comes to the house when I need him (or on week-ends, when there's pizza and Guinness Extra Stout), participates in the four local TNR programs, continues his education and keeps up with the journals and research associations, and is a multi-cat, multi-dog household himself. I'm not at all suggesting that you change vets, but having a chat with other local veterinarians - or asking the local feral focus groups, shelters and cat advocacy groups which vets they like - can go a long way toward finding a veterinarian who'll go the extra mile, and who understands multi-cat households.
.

 

[foxxycat]

all good points above. Thank you all for chiming in. Good to see this feedback!

 

[PushPurrCatPaws]

As several posters have pointed out, many vets probably have seen way too many negative scenarios of "people-with-their-pets" where a lot of bad things have happened and where owners were not as responsible or adept with any of the many pet issues that can crop up. It's my view that most of those vets need to be forgiven if they live in that "bubble" of being exposed only to the more thoughtless pet owners over the years. We all have judgments against people, and I think it's important to break out of "bubbles" when possible. You do need to have good communication and trust with your pet's vet, and like-mindedness too... it is important to hold similar opinions. But sometimes, if you are willing and if you are confident in the way you raise your pets and that you make a good example for them and for you, it could help vets to have a more well-rounded group of clients if you stick around and be one of the true blue few who can show vets that a good quality of life exists for people and animals living a lifestyle different from the problem-prone ones that the vets sadly often have to observe and deal with.
Just my two cents.

 

[kashmir64]

It's even worse when the vet tech comes right out and tells you that she thinks you are incapable of taking care of the kittens recovery because you asked them a question.

Try not to listen to your vet on this. ( I know, it gets under your skin) You know that you can handle 4 cats and give them the care and attention they need.

 

[kittens mom]

The majority of veterinarians don't know you past the exam room door. It would have been smarter for the veterinarian to ask questions that didn't make you feel defensive of the way you care for your cats. I have had honest conversations with my vet over everything including the fact that we couldn't afford to pay almost 1400$ for two spays and were taking the kits to a clinic we had used before. She checked out how they monitored the surgery and asked to have their records updated at her clinic and we've had visits since then where there are no hard feelings. She'll do Mercy's dental in a few months because she may cost twice as much but she has mad skills in this area and Mercy has a special mouth. If I email her right now I'll have an answer in my mailbox no later than tomorrow morning. If your veterinarian dismisses you ,looks down on you and acts like you are launching a personal attack by asking questions you are not in the right place and neither are your cats. Veterinarians are becoming more like pediatricians since many of us consider them our children and health care is started early and aimed at keeping our pets healthy throughout their lives.

 

[ReallySleepy]

What these people don't understand is that not everyone is looking for a lap cat. Not everyone thinks cats jumping on the kitchen bench is a problem but rather a unique personality trait. Not everyone only plays with their cat once a week.

I think you put it quite well. My own cat is very laid-back, downright passive whenever he is indoors. I actually wish he would jump on the kitchen bench now and then and be a little more "crazy". He has other peculiarities as well. And then, he is a great comrade who brightens my day, every day. Judging his behavior is a matter for him and me and no one else, and that's the way it should be for all cats and their owners.

 

[kittens mom]

I think you put it quite well. My own cat is very laid-back, downright passive whenever he is indoors. I actually wish he would jump on the kitchen bench now and then and be a little more "crazy". He has other peculiarities as well. And then, he is a great comrade who brightens my day, every day. Judging his behavior is a matter for him and me and no one else, and that's the way it should be for all cats and their owners.

Well put again. I consider it perfectly normal to find a cat sitting on a pantry shelf. While my cats are usually reasonable in the exam room I would hate for any veterinarian to assume some of the less than stellar behaviors are common at home.

 

[josiegirl]

I had four cats (3 have passed from old age, 1 still thriving at 15) and have been judged, also. I've had many vets and a lot of them were incompetent, I hate to say. They were critical of my rotational diet of wet food and raw, trying to push their expensive high carb crap food on me. Last year one of my cats was having trouble pooping and acting lethargic. Vet said nothing was wrong, ignored my concern of the orange-like urine, and told me he would live to be 20 years old. A couple days later I took him to a different vet who said he was dying of liver failure. He passed 10 days later. I have never been so devastated and ANGRY.

My new vet I feel blessed to have. No judgement. Best of all, he also feeds his cats raw food and is very happy of my kitty's diet. He was the vet who diagnosed my kitty with liver failure and was very compassionate. Keep searching for a vet you feel comfortable with. It may take a while. But the vet works FOR YOU. He has no business pushing his views on your 4 cat household. I live in a 1 bedroom apt with 4 cats and they were the happiest cats ever!!

 

[josiegirl]

The majority of veterinarians don't know you past the exam room door. It would have been smarter for the veterinarian to ask questions that didn't make you feel defensive of the way you care for your cats. I have had honest conversations with my vet over everything including the fact that we couldn't afford to pay almost 1400$ for two spays and were taking the kits to a clinic we had used before. She checked out how they monitored the surgery and asked to have their records updated at her clinic and we've had visits since then where there are no hard feelings. She'll do Mercy's dental in a few months because she may cost twice as much but she has mad skills in this area and Mercy has a special mouth. If I email her right now I'll have an answer in my mailbox no later than tomorrow morning. If your veterinarian dismisses you ,looks down on you and acts like you are launching a personal attack by asking questions you are not in the right place and neither are your cats. Veterinarians are becoming more like pediatricians since many of us consider them our children and health care is started early and aimed at keeping our pets healthy throughout their lives.

I just read that your kitten died from a negligent vet. Not to be a little off-topic, but what happened?