Adopting/socializing Adult Semi-feral

[loalar]

We had been feeding a lone stray or feral cat who was living outside for the past couple of years and we were at the point where he would wait for me during meal times and he even sniffed my hand once. I'm not sure how old he is, but my best guess is 3-4 years. The first time we saw him was in July 2015 and he looked like a young adult.

At any rate, a month and a half ago, a fumigation tent was going up on one of the houses where he would hang out so we knew we had to capture him. I was heading out of town so a friend who had connections with a TNR group brought him in to get neutered and treated for worms, mites and fleas. I came back a week and a half later and he has been indoors with us since. He spent the first week in an X-Pen and the last 4 weeks in a guest room cordoned off from the rest of the house (the friend who brought him in to get fixed forgot to get him tested for FIV and FELV so we can't introduce him to my other two yet ). I think he's happy indoors as he has shown no interest in trying to escape the room (we have a camera in the room with him so we can watch when we are not inside). The first few days, he would growl, hiss and lunge at me when I cleaned his litter and changed out his food/water. But he progressed to eating treats from our hands and enjoying a good scratch with a back scratcher. My husband and I each spend an hour or two each day hanging out in the room with him and he will sometimes sleep very close to our feet as we sit in a chair and work. When we're not in the room, he hangs out on the cat tree looking outside, scratches his scratching post, bats a catnip ball around and wrestles with a catnip banana and generally looks very domesticated and acts kitten like. He has also become quite vocal, meowing and excitedly running over to us when we bring in his food. He's still a bit skittish though and large or sudden movements can scare him so we try to move very slowly and have not touched him with our hands (aside from him licking the treats out of our hands).

All seemed to be going well. But yesterday and today, he started lunging at my husband and I, cornering us and hissing when start to leave the room. He hasn't physically attacked either of us, but he can be quite scary (he is about 14 pounds, has a very large head and neck and looks like he could be a Bobcat mix). We then stay perfectly still, talk in soothing tones and get him to back off either by tossing treats away from the door, or the person not in the room will have to distract him by knocking on a window or making some other kind of noise.

My questions are, is this normal? Is there something we should be doing to get him to stop cornering us? Is there a better way to handle it when he does? I'm starting to feel a bit fearful around him now which makes me sad and which I'm hoping he can't sense. Also, we need to get him back to the vet to get tested for the contagious diseases and he has also been sneezing so I'd like to get a full exam, but at this point I'm afraid to get too close to him and he won't go anywhere near the cat trap again. Any advice on getting him back into a carrier to go to a vet?

Thank you for any advice!

 

[msaimee]

It sounds as though his patience is running out, and he no longer wants to be confined to a room. Has he had any interaction with your resident cats yet? Have they been sniffing or pawing at each other from underneath the door? Once he gets a clean bill of health, you have a few options. You can begin to allow him access to other parts of your house so he has more room to run and play and like a normal cat, or you can release him back outside and care for him as an indoor outdoor cat, or if he chooses not to come inside again, care for him as an outdoor only cat. Not all cats can adjust to being indoor only, especially if they were once feral. His behavior right now is normal because he is feeling trapped and frustrated. I would get him to your vet ASAP to get SNAP tested for FIV and FelV. Now, regarding how to get him to a vet. This worked for me once, but it requires two people. Bring a pet carrier into the room and place it on the floor vertical, with the opening on top with the door open. One person throws a towel over him, picks him up and scoops him into the carrier head first while the other person closes the door to the carrier. He won't like it, but it's all for his own good. Be sure and wear thick gloves, work gloves that you can purchase at a hardware store. You don't want to get bitten. Good luck. It sounds like you've made a lot of progress so far, and only time will tell if he can adjust to being indoor with the full run of the house, or indoor and outdoor, or outdoor only. You will know in your heart what to do.

 

[Draco]

Do you have other cats outside that may be agitating him too? It also seems like redirected aggression.

Leave the carrier in the room with the door open. put treats inside and walk away. do this daily until he's comfortably entering on his own and hopefully you can close the door with him inside.

 

[loalar]

It sounds as though his patience is running out, and he no longer wants to be confined to a room. Has he had any interaction with your resident cats yet? Have they been sniffing or pawing at each other from underneath the door? Once he gets a clean bill of health, you have a few options. You can begin to allow him access to other parts of your house so he has more room to run and play and like a normal cat, or you can release him back outside and care for him as an indoor outdoor cat, or if he chooses not to come inside again, care for him as an outdoor only cat. Not all cats can adjust to being indoor only, especially if they were once feral. His behavior right now is normal because he is feeling trapped and frustrated. I would get him to your vet ASAP to get SNAP tested for FIV and FelV. Now, regarding how to get him to a vet. This worked for me once, but it requires two people. Bring a pet carrier into the room and place it on the floor vertical, with the opening on top with the door open. One person throws a towel over him, picks him up and scoops him into the carrier head first while the other person closes the door to the carrier. He won't like it, but it's all for his own good. Be sure and wear thick gloves, work gloves that you can purchase at a hardware store. You don't want to get bitten. Good luck. It sounds like you've made a lot of progress so far, and only time will tell if he can adjust to being indoor with the full run of the house, or indoor and outdoor, or outdoor only. You will know in your heart what to do.

Thank you! Yeah, you're probably right about him feeling confined and frustrated. We will try the towel method to get him into a carrier and to the vet tomorrow. When he was outside, he would lay in front of one of my windows and one of my cats (Monet) would always come running and they'd lay on opposite sides looking at each other. No hissing. Now Monet will roll around outside his door and look under the door at him and sometimes when she does that he will stand at the door listening to her, almost like they are having telepathic conversations. So I'm hopeful it will be an easy introduction once he's cleared of FIV and FelV.

 

[loalar]

Do you have other cats outside that may be agitating him too? It also seems like redirected aggression.

Leave the carrier in the room with the door open. put treats inside and walk away. do this daily until he's comfortably entering on his own and hopefully you can close the door with him inside.

He has never demonstrated aggression that I've seen towards other animals. I've seen a couple of the neighbor cats go after him and he defended himself, but I never saw him initiate. One time I even saw him watching a squirrel eat his food. He waited til the squirrel was done, then went over and ate what was left.

Good idea with the treats in the carrier. We have left it in the room and he does occasionally go in it to sleep, but when he hears us coming towards the door he comes out. But maybe if we put treats in it while we are in the room, we will be able to get him. Between that and the towel method suggested by msaimee hopefully we will have success getting him to the vet! Wish me luck...

 

[weebeasties]

@ loalar
Hi! I was curious about your post. Are you saying that he seems generally friendly and enjoys your company and that he becomes aggressive only when you are leaving? If that is the case, it makes me wonder if he is doing something similar to what our Rocky would do.
Rocky was an adult feral that we took in. While he was in "isolation" we would visit him many times during the day. He was friendly and happy during the visits, but when we would walk to the door to leave he would come at us and bite and swat at our legs. I don't think he ever broke the skin, but sometimes those bites would hurt! It seemed like aggressive behavior, but we had known him for several years before we brought him in and I just knew he wasn't an aggressive cat. It turned out that he was just upset that we were leaving. It was his only way to show displeasure at being left alone. He gradually stopped this behavior when he realized that we WERE going to come back. We gradually introduced him to our other cats and the whole house. That was about 7 years ago. He is the most cuddly of all our cats! I don't know if this is what your cat is doing, but I thought I would mention it. Good luck with everything and thanks for giving this boy a home!

 

[loalar]

@ loalar
Hi! I was curious about your post. Are you saying that he seems generally friendly and enjoys your company and that he becomes aggressive only when you are leaving? If that is the case, it makes me wonder if he is doing something similar to what our Rocky would do.
Rocky was an adult feral that we took in. While he was in "isolation" we would visit him many times during the day. He was friendly and happy during the visits, but when we would walk to the door to leave he would come at us and bite and swat at our legs. I don't think he ever broke the skin, but sometimes those bites would hurt! It seemed like aggressive behavior, but we had known him for several years before we brought him in and I just knew he wasn't an aggressive cat. It turned out that he was just upset that we were leaving. It was his only way to show displeasure at being left alone. He gradually stopped this behavior when he realized that we WERE going to come back. We gradually introduced him to our other cats and the whole house. That was about 7 years ago. He is the most cuddly of all our cats! I don't know if this is what your cat is doing, but I thought I would mention it. Good luck with everything and thanks for giving this boy a home!

YES! That sounds exactly like what he's doing. He seems really happy when we are in there interacting with him. Actually it's almost impossible to just sit and do work while in there because he comes running over to us and wants us to pay attention to him. And when we go towards the door to leave, that's when he comes after us in a seemingly aggressive manner. But I have noticed his ears never go back flat like a truly aggressive cat. Thank you so much for posting. It makes me feel so much better about the situation. I would love to hear more about your experiences with bringing Rocky in if you have time to share!

 

[loalar]

Update: We have decided to postpone the vet visit for another week as we seem to have made another big step with him and don't want it to be tainted by stuffing him in a carrier and taking him to get poked and prodded. Last night, he rubbed against my husband's legs! And then he played with me with a wiggly toy for almost an hour. Between the two of us, we spent about 3 consecutive hours with him and altho he came after my husband when he left (he was the first shift), I think he was too exhausted from playing with me to come after me when I left. I think he may be ready for a pet with a real hand... wish us luck!

FYI, here is a video of what he does when we leave:

And yet, when we are in there, this is how friendly he is:
Getting scratched with a back scratcher:
Playing like a kitten:

 

[weebeasties]

After watching your video it really seems like he doesn't want you to go. It's so similar to Rocky's early days. He definitely enjoys the pleasure of your company (as your other videos show) and he doesn't want it to end.
Social interactions can be awkward and difficult with two parties of the same species so a cat trying to learn how to interact with humans must be a bit overwhelming for him. Not to mention being neutered and going from outdoors to indoors. He must feel like he was dropped on another planet! Lucky for him it was a planet so loving and good as yours!
It is so great that he rubbed against your husband's legs. He must be walking on cloud 9 right now!
Anything you want to know about our adventures with Rocky just ask. I love talking about my babies.

 

[loalar]

After watching your video it really seems like he doesn't want you to go. It's so similar to Rocky's early days. He definitely enjoys the pleasure of your company (as your other videos show) and he doesn't want it to end.
Social interactions can be awkward and difficult with two parties of the same species so a cat trying to learn how to interact with humans must be a bit overwhelming for him. Not to mention being neutered and going from outdoors to indoors. He must feel like he was dropped on another planet! Lucky for him it was a planet so loving and good as yours!
It is so great that he rubbed against your husband's legs. He must be walking on cloud 9 right now!
Anything you want to know about our adventures with Rocky just ask. I love talking about my babies.

That is so good to hear! I have been so stressed out thinking I'm inadvertently doing something that is causing a setback.

I keep searching for taming adult ferals and strays and most of what I find says not to even try if they are over 2 years old. Some even say it's cruel. But I really feel like Bob is enjoying being fed regularly and having a nice place to sleep and that he is going to end up being an awesome indoor kitty so I am completely ignoring that advice. He has never once given any indication that he wants to get back outside.

How old was Rocky when you brought him inside? How had your interactions been prior to bringing him in? And how long did it take before you could pet him and hold him without fearing bites and scratches?

 

[weebeasties]

But I really feel like Bob is enjoying being fed regularly and having a nice place to sleep and that he is going to end up being an awesome indoor kitty so I am completely ignoring that advice.

Good for you! Don't get me wrong, I always try to listen to the advice of others and to see things from their perspective, but sometimes you need to go with your gut. From the beginning with Rocky I said it was a leap of faith. He had to have faith that this human wouldn't hurt him and I in turn had to have faith he would't hurt me.
BTW - 2 of our 8 cats were adult ferals when we decided to make them part of our family. I am by no means an expert. Not at all! But I am more than happy to share my experience in the hopes that it might be a little help.
So, your questions. We are guessing Rocky was about 7 years old when he finally became a housecat. It was 4 years from the first time I put out some food for him to the day he moved in. We lived on 3 fenced-in acres surrounded by woods. I first started by putting food in a dish at the woodline and I would catch glimpses of him eating at dusk. Then sometimes during the day but always trying to stay hidden in the woods. After a while I moved the dish a little closer to the house so he would have to come out in the yard to eat and I could finally see him. We had a screened porch so I could watch him from there but as soon as I stepped outside he would dart away into the woods. Eventually, he would stay in the yard and watch me from a distance. 75 feet, 50 feet, 25 feet. I would spend lots of time gardening and he would watch. I acted like I was ignoring him and went about my business. He watched. If I had to go from point A to point B and he was directly in my path I would do a WIDE circle around him. He would still jump up and run away but only about 10 feet now. Then 5 feet. Then just politely move to the side as I passed. ( Can you tell this was PAINFULLY SLOW) Then I began putting down his food but not walking away until he got up the courage to walk up to me to eat. Then I would leave him in peace to finish his meal. (Again SLOW) Then I would just stand there while he ate. He was nervous and jumpy but he did it. I began talking to him. I would make eye contact. As I did anything outdoors. He would meow to me. We were socializing! He began to actively follow me around. He would do this roly poly thing in front of me. Just roll around at my feet. I would reach out to touch him but then he would run away a few feet and meow. I just felt like he badly wanted affection, but was too scared. So then I took the leap and one day while he was eating and distracted I reached down and touched him. He jumped, hissed, ran away 10 feet. I just spoke calmly to him and he came back. This was repeated a lot. Then he stopped running away. Then it went from a momentary touch to a full pet. Eventually I could pet him when he wasn't eating. He discovered he liked it! Then I took another leap and picked him up. It was very quick. He was eating and I just put my hands around his middle and lifted him about 6 inches and immediately put him back down. He was surprised and his body went all stiff when I did it, but he was ok. Wierded out but ok. No hissing. No scratching. No time to react before he was back down on the ground. This was repeated over months. Gradually lifting him higher, holding him a little bit longer. He always would go stiff, but he never hurt me. It was just this strange thing I was doing and he tolerated it. Finally I was able to handle him and we knew we were going to be moving soon so it was time to make him an indoor kitty.
So he was tamed before he came inside. I know it's not the way most people recommend but there were other things going on and that's just way it had to be in our situation.
Rocky is very sweet and loving. He loves to nap with us. When you sit on the couch, he has to be on you. Not near you. ON YOU. Maybe he is still trying to make up for all those years he didn't have love in his life. I get really upset when I hear people say a cat is too old to socialize. It just takes time, commitment, empathy, and patience. Those are all things you seem to have in abundance. Bob is a very lucky boy indeed.
I am so sorry for this book length post. It is hard to fit a journey of years into a few sentences. If you are still awake, I want to wish you the very best for Bob. Please keep posting about his progress. And if you have any more questions I PROMISE I will make my responses brief!

 

[weebeasties]

Ok, one more thing and then I'll shut up. While Rocky enjoys looking out the window, he has shown no interest in going outside. No lingering, crying, pawing at the door. No darting. Jasmine, our other former feral, seems genuinely terrified at the thought of going outside. She won't get closer than 4 feet to the door!

 

[loalar]

Ok, one more thing and then I'll shut up.

Please feel free to write novels, I really enjoy hearing about your experiences and will enjoy hearing anything else you want to share! It makes me feel like I'm not crazy or alone in taking this on. And it's really helping me to understand where we are, what to look for and what the next steps will be. I am curious about your first trip to the vet. It's taken so long to get to where we are that I'm hoping it doesn't set us back in the trust department. We were originally planning to go today, then we decided to wait til next week, but then I decided to get pet insurance on him today and there is a 14 day waiting period. So it looks like it will have to be two weeks.

I am super excited to report that during my visit this afternoon, he full on purred! There were a couple of other times where he was making some noises that may have been purrs, but I wasn't sure if he was purring or if his tummy was rumbling. Today it was very clearly a purr. I feel so excited! And he sniffed my fingers and played a lot again. Unfortunately he got so excited playing that he hit his head on the cage that's in the room (not too hard) which stunned him, but he did not hiss or lash out so I think that's a good sign too. And when it was time to leave, he allowed me to go without hissing or lashing out. I'm not sure if he's calming down because he's starting to realize that I'll be back or if he was too exhausted from his play session to put up a fight. Either way, it's looking like progress.

 

[weebeasties]

Ohhh yay! Sounds like progress to me too! I won't be much help with the vet visit because Rock was already used to being handled when he had his first dr. appointment. I was able to just pick him up and shove him in the carrier before he knew what was happening.
I would let the vet know ahead of time that he is feral so they are prepared for any...um...erratic behavior. And honestly two more weeks of building trust with you before he goes to the scary place isn't a bad thing.

 

[loalar]

Ohhh yay! Sounds like progress to me too! I won't be much help with the vet visit because Rock was already used to being handled when he had his first dr. appointment.

Thank you! I'm actually more curious as to his reaction to the vet (being a complete stranger as opposed to you who he had bonded with) and if he became stand offish after returning from the vet. Or if it all went really well? Hopefully with the additional 2 weeks, we'll be able to get to a point where we can pick him up. Fingers crossed!!!

 

[weebeasties]

I guess every cat is going to act diifferently. Rocky's first trip was for tests, neuter, vaccinations so we dropped him off in the morning and picked him up that evening. He didn't seem to harbor any ill will toward us and was happy to be home. Subsequent visits, he does his old standby of going stiff when the vet handles him but I've never seen him be aggressive. There have been a few times that they have taken him out of the room (for xrays and such). I think he has been difficult with the staff at that point, but nothing major. He always has returned to his sweet self when we come home. It could just be his personality. I always said he was a lover not a fighter.
I'm so excited for Bob and I love hearing about him. Do you know much about his life before you took him in? I know you had been feeding him for a couple of years. Did he hang out at your house all the time or just show up for meals? Do you live in an urban area where he may have come in contact (at least visually) with lots of people? Rocky came from a very rural, remote area so I think his contact/observations of people were limited. Unfortunately, during an xray they discovered that he has buckshot embedded in his abdomen. They chose not to remove it because it had happened years ago and was completely healed around it. They felt surgery would do more harm than good. It breaks my heart that someone did that. It had to have happened when he was pretty young because he never appeared injured since we have known him.

 

[loalar]

OMG that makes me so mad! Why would someone do that to him???!!! It's amazing and a testament to you (and to him) that after his experience of being shot by someone, you were still able to get him to become a trusting, cuddly bundle of fur.

Good to hear the vet visits haven't had an effect on his temperament. Hopefully it will be the same with Bob. I just found out that the insurance company needs him to get a physical after all before starting his policy so it looks like we are back to next week as the goal date to bring him in.

I don't know much about Bob prior to him coming inside. I don't know if he was abandoned or if he was a true feral. The first time I saw him was July 2015 and he looked like a young adult. We are in a densely populated area so I'm sure he has seen many people and our neighbors used to feed him as well before they moved. I'm hoping no one was ever cruel to him but who knows? There are two houses in our neighborhood with a total of about 10 indoor/outdoor cats so those are the ones that he would try to hang out with (they weren't that accepting of him). He was the only one who didn't have people to call his own. At first I would see him very sporadically and sometimes go a week or two without a sighting. Once he got used to the feeding times, he started waiting on the wall (we have a 6' brick wall around our back yard and I would put his food on it). As time went on, he began napping outside my office window and one of my cats (the one in my profile pic) began what I like to call a love affair. She would sit on my desk next to the window on the inside and he would sit outside and they would watch each other. If I saw Bob sleeping and she wasn't already there, I would call out to her saying "Bob's here" and she would come running to the window to lay down and watch him. Occasionally I would see him sleeping in our back yard and unfortunately drinking out of our pool despite leaving him bowls of fresh water. In addition to my two female cats, I also have a male pug and every now and then he'd be let out back when Bob was in the yard. The pug would excitedly run towards him and he would very casually climb up the wall and nonchalantly look at the pug.

I had progressed to a point where I could get within two feet of him without him bolting and one time he even sniffed my finger. I was originally planning to continue building trust with him outside, but one morning I saw a fumigation tent going up over the neighbor's house and I knew he hung out there so I had to get him quick. After convincing the fumigators to stop, the trap was set and he was in it 15 minutes later. Almost like he knew... And the rest is history.

 

[weebeasties]

Wow! Trapping him within 15 minutes is amazing! Maybe chance, maybe fate. Either way, a good outcome for Bob.
I wondered about the area he was in because maybe the more different people he has seen, the less likely he would be freaked out by strangers at the vet? Let's hope so. It's a shame you have to get a physical for the insurance. It would have been nice to get him a little more used to contact first, but from your video you can see how much he cares for you already and when you bring him home just provide reassurance and comfort the best way you can. If it's with treats and a backscratcher, so be it. In 6 months time it will be cuddles!

We had insurance through PetPlan years ago, but we dropped it. They were very good when we had it though. They didn't require an initial physical, just yearly checkups and vaccinations. They may have changed thier policies over the years.
The stories about Bob's "girlfriend" are so cute! Just don't be surprised if when they get to meet face-to-face they aren't as friendly. It may take a little time before they are best buds.

 

[loalar]

Well, things did not go as well today I'm just trying to remember that it's 2 steps forward, 1 step back and that we are still overall making lots of progress. He came at me 3 times. Once when I came in and put his food down, once when he was enjoying a head scratch and once as I was starting to leave and filling his water bowl. We missed our normal 3:00 playtime and treat time because my husband and I both had to work so perhaps he was mad about that? He wasn't super vicious, but it makes me sad because I think we've gotten to a certain point and then this happens:

 

[weebeasties]

When I watch your video I still just see a boy who does't quite know how to deal with his emotions/behave with people. When he thinks you are leaving, he shows displeasure, when he is excited or overly happy he momentarily lashes out because he doesn't want it to stop. After his little outbursts he then just sits there looking slightly awkward. He just doesn't know what to do with these emotions. He isn't being continually aggressive. Does he understand the word No yet? Rocky knew the word no (or at least the change in my tone) when his similar behavior started. So I would let him know when he was doing something unacceptable. Never yelling. Just more firm than the normal tone. A lot of times I would just leave and come back in about 15 minutes to hang out.
Got to go to work now. Hang in there. I know it is SLOW going, but you guys have accomplished so much!