Adopting A Third Cat- Yes Or No?

[Catmom24]

Hi everyone, I need some help! My husband and I are having some trouble making a decision on when/if we should adopt a third cat. We rent our apartment, which is a medium sized apartment. We have one bedroom, living room, kitchen and bathroom with two small rooms- a mudroom and a room we use for storage. We currently have 2 cats, both spayed females, both about 1 1/2 years old- Luna (very sweet and easy going) and Gail (more independent and energetic). We adopted Gail very recently, just a few weeks ago, but her and Luna are getting along very well! They play and eat together and the introduction (after a few days of isolation) was very easy. Gail has warmed up to me very quickly, but not my husband. He is very easy with her, but she runs from him when he tries to give her attention. I know that she will come around, but he had his heart set on a cat that would love him like Luna does. We are obviously keeping Gail so we started talking about adding a 3rd, and having my husband pick the cat. He is not sold on the idea, so I thought asking a forum for more info may help us make a good decision, whether it's a yes or a no, or a maybe later (since we have just brought Gail in). We are financially able to have 3, and have room for enough litter boxes (at least 3). Does anyone have an opinion, or been through a similar situation? Thank you!

 

[verna davies]

There is no guarantee that another cat will be a lap cat. I have three and none of them will sit on my lap although they like to be in the same room as me. By having another one it could cause friction between the two you have.
Why not wait a while and see if Gail warms to your husband. You have only had her a short time so she might decide she likes him. Cats are very independent and do what they want which is not always what we want. I hope she decides she likes the look of his lap soon.

 

[Catmom24]

There is no guarantee that another cat will be a lap cat. I have three and none of them will sit on my lap although they like to be in the same room as me. By having another one it could cause friction between the two you have.
Why not wait a while and see if Gail warms to your husband. You have only had her a short time so she might decide she likes him. Cats are very independent and do what they want which is not always what we want. I hope she decides she likes the look of his lap soon.

Okay, thank you! I really hope she warms up to him, too. We have decided to wait to adopt, to give it a few months, and then see where we are (I think). In the meantime, he is going to try playing with her more often instead of trying to cuddle or pet her. She LOVES to play, and I am hoping it will help them bond.

 

[Kieka]

It sounds like your current cats are open to other cats. Not all cats are as willing to accept a new fur family member. I know in my household my boy would gladly be in a home with a dozen cats but my girl wants nothing to do with any animals outside her current family.

I would agree with the other poster that there is no guarantee that any cat will become a lap cat. Out of the three in our home one loves laps, one likes laps most of the time and one likes laps once in a blue moon but don't touch him when he is on your lap. If she is younger she might settle into a lap after she works out the play. Remember that the hunt, catch, kill, sleep hunting cycle works best when it comes to play. I always finish play time by tossing treats or with a meal and my cats naturally want to just sleep right after that.

 

[verna davies]

The odd treat now and again might win her over. I really hope she becomes his lap cat, theres nothing better. Please keep us updated.

 

[Kieka]

I would add, that if you decided to get a third go to the shelter or rescue and have your husband sit on the floor or a chair. Wait for the cat or kitten that climbs into his lap and settles in. That should be an indicator that the cat will be a lap cat.

 

[haleyds]

If you do decide to adopt a third I would recommend the above. If a cat will sit in his lap at the shelter it will at home too. Even if you have to wait to find that perfect match, it'll be worth the wait in the long run.

 

[Catmom24]

It sounds like your current cats are open to other cats. Not all cats are as willing to accept a new fur family member. I know in my household my boy would gladly be in a home with a dozen cats but my girl wants nothing to do with any animals outside her current family.

I would agree with the other poster that there is no guarantee that any cat will become a lap cat. Out of the three in our home one loves laps, one likes laps most of the time and one likes laps once in a blue moon but don't touch him when he is on your lap. If she is younger she might settle into a lap after she works out the play. Remember that the hunt, catch, kill, sleep hunting cycle works best when it comes to play. I always finish play time by tossing treats or with a meal and my cats naturally want to just sleep right after that.

Thank you! Yeah, I agree they are open to meeting a new friend. Luna has always been an easy going cat, and Gail came from a home with 3 other cats before we adopted her. In the meantime, I will tell my husband about the play (hunting) cycle. That may help him understand Gail's behavior a little bit. She is very receptive to play and some odd pets thrown in while she is having a brief rest. And she does like treats, so we will try that after playtime.

 

[Catmom24]

I would add, that if you decided to get a third go to the shelter or rescue and have your husband sit on the floor or a chair. Wait for the cat or kitten that climbs into his lap and settles in. That should be an indicator that the cat will be a lap cat.

That is the strangest thing about this situation actually. When we met Gail at the shelter, she was SUPER affectionate with us and climbed into both of our laps and laid there for awhile and got lots of pets. She was even like that the first couple of days in isolation. But once we opened up the house to her, she seemed very skittish (which is understandable) but never warmed back up to my husband. We will do this again, though, if we visit the shelter. It's just hard to figure out why Gail's behaving the way she is.

 

[Animal Freak]

Give Gail time. You haven't had her long at all. It normally takes a few months for everyone to settle in, if not a year or so. Even if she seems to be fine, it could still be a bit intimidating her for. One room is very different from a whole house - especially when that whole house contains another cat. They could still be working things out. She has to find her place in the household. Do you know anything about her previous home? Often times animals bond more easily with someone of the same sex as their owner. My dog, for example, absolutely loves most men because her previous owner was a man and he suddenly disappeared from her life. She loves everyone, but the two people she really bonded with were my uncle and me. He's now gone and she seems to look for a sort of replacement.

Also, shelter life is different than home life. Even at the best shelter, it can be hard to give all those animals the proper care and attention. It's this strange place full of other cats and even the occasional dog depending on the setup and they may or may not be getting enough attention. So personalities might vary slightly under different circumstances. Either way, I would definitely wait on getting another cat. It's way too soon to say for certain what the situation between these two as well as between Gail and your husband will be.

 

[danteshuman]

I would advise against another cat ... at least for now. It doesn't sound like there is a lot of space, and cats love to own territory. (However with creative building and MANY cat shelves that could be compensated.) One of my cats (Dante) is not super cuddly but LOVES to be laying on my laps. So when he starts to get antsy, I respect his wish and stop petting him. From the time I first got him, I always gave him 15 minutes minimum if he got on my lap. When he was a hyper little kitten I use to put a comforter over my lap ... then entice him on it with toys. I never forced him to be a lap cat but I did encourage it. You can encourage it to (***hint keep the house a little cold, they will flock to your body heat)

Even our semi-feral cat now demands nightly attention/cuddles on my roommate's lap. It took him years and a neutering to get there but there is hope.

 

[MegAH2]

I'm not sure about this, but now might be the time to get another one IMO, because if you wait then maybe the other two will bond so much that they reject a third in the future? Not sure about this, my sister had a problem with a third (all were male though), and had lots of peeing going on. When I had four cats, one became the odd-man-out, though she was my oldest, and around the longest.. sometimes it's just personalities and not number.. good luck trying to get a cuddly one! I stalked my cat max 6 times at petsmart, and just observed him in different settings.. I wanted to make sure he was super laid-back like a cat I had before him.. and he is! Good luck!

 

[Draco]

Consider fostering! If your two current cats accepted each other easily, they may be open to other cats coming and going. Once you find the right cat that'd fit your family, you can adopt then. Or you can learn that a 3rd cat is a mistake, and there'd be no pressure if it doesn't work out.

There's always cats needing foster homes and it's a win/win with you and the shelters, IMO!

 

[arouetta]

Some people have touched on it but have not been really clear. Right now Luna has the dominant scent in the house. Immediately after you opened the house to Gail, all it had was Luna's scent. Basically the scent means to Gail that she is deep inside another cat's territory and that is a frightening thing to a cat. Even with them getting along it's still a major intimidation factor. That in turn will likely cause a new cat to be very cautious and very low key until all the scent is equally mingled and primary territories are worked out between them.

On top of that they are both very young with a lot of kitten energy still in them. So it could be a year or more before either settles into wanting to be still long enough for cuddling.

Give it time. Lots of time. The more disruption the cats go through, the longer it's going to take for everyone to chill out and calm down.