I do not know much about my Bella's past. I do know that she had a family that ignored her health problems, resulting in a "cabbage ear" and a badly damaged tooth that needed to be removed. I know abandoned her, sealed in a cardboard box, in freezing temperatures. And I know that they must...
My Bella complained when I trimmed her nails, and tried to bat my hand away with her paws, but she never used her claws on me. She has not tried to scratch me when I have had to give her medication either.
If anyone suggested declawing I think /I/ would be trying to scratch them up.
Admittedly...
Bella will use her cat bed occasionally, usually when she is snubbing me. From time to time, she will nap on her cat tree or perch on the window seat. Usually, however, she is on the bed. And she often likes to position herself right in the middle, so the I barely have room no matter which...
I remind myself how unfair it would be to the cat(s) in question if I bit off more than I could chew. And then from time to time I pick up an extra can for the local shelter.
It is entirely possible that loneliness is the issue. If my kitty is vocal, it means she wants food, her litter box cleaned, or attention. Would it be possible for your cat to have a place to sleep in your bedroom?
Also, is she spayed? If not, she may be signaling that she is fertile.
Definitely try the "taking them at the same time" thing when you can, but be aware that if your older can has to have something done, the discomfort might make her aggressive anyway.
Regarding the Mexican Vanilla, the confusion is that tonka beans, which are also sold under the name vanillin...
It depends on what the cat likes to scratch, as well as what you make clear is available for the cat's use. My cat will only use cardboard scratchers, not carpet or rope. Some cats might not like to scratch wicker at all. Spray or sprinkle catnip on what you DO want your new cat to use to...