Merlin's death from pneumonia or something else

[Meowmee]

I keep thinking of the last times I saw Merlin alive. When they brought him to see me at the hospital before I left him there they carried him out and he was meowing at me asking me:
“What am I doing here”, and then he started breathing faster and they took him right back to oxygen. I just gave him a kiss etc.
And then when he was in the oxygen a few hours later, I think, I can’t remember now how much later it was, and his breathing looked so awful…he was clearly uncomfortable. He didn’t even look at me, although I think he heard me. I was just thinking I should let him go that night cause it didn’t look like he was gonna make it out and I feel so terrible.

It’s not what I wanted for our last moments to be and for him to suffer for no reason. I certainly didn’t expect two weeks before that any of this was going to happen. I think there’s a long history of these hospitals trying to convince you they know what they’re doing and they can help, etc. a lot of time they’re just being dishonest or so incompetent and they’re just going for as much money as they can get from you because you’re desperate to help your cat.

Some of them kept saying how well he was doing, and he was their best patient, but it was obvious to anybody with a brain that he was doing terribly.

 

[Meowmee]

I finally have a preliminary necropsy report. I’m still waiting for an addendum report. I’ll start a thread in the lounge when I get that and have had time to read it.

I have to say that so far anyway it leaves me with a lot of questions and no real answers yet. Angie’s autopsy / necropsy report was very clear about what was going on whereas Merlin’s seems to be a bit all over the place and is more complex.
Still Angie’s report would not state how much of a role convenia played in her death and they only said they had not heard of it at the time causing anemia so they refrained from taking a clear stand then. However they did determine which type of cancer she had and which anemia.

Again with Merlin they said they can’t tell how much of a role telazol may or may not have played in his death.

A brief synopsis from what I have read so far is they think pneumonia caused by toxoplasmosis caused his death- on the other hand, they also said that he could’ve had bacterial or viral pneumonia and they can’t tell for sure whether it was aspiration pneumonia. I don’t know how they could say all this at the same time. It sounds a bit crazy to me.

His blood work done a week before he died did not show signs of bacterial infection as I recall.

They also said there were effects in his brain, his kidneys, his pancreas and his spleen, that could be caused by Toxoplasmosis. But they don’t seem sure. I don’t know if they actually tested him for that. I can’t tell yet to be honest. They also said they thought he had a tumor in his pancreas, but they’re not sure.

They seem to be saying something severe was going on in his spleen also. Which I remember the second xray radiologist report also said maybe

I certainly hope the addendum is going to clarify things a little bit more because it just seems all over the place to me. I’m not sure what to think really.

I feel very depressed that if he did indeed have all of this going on that it doesn’t seem like he received the right treatments for any of this, and I should’ve just let him go instead of torturing him. Certainly the sedation did not help anything that was going on with him and made it all worse imo.

It’s just all so heart breaking. I wish I had let him go and not taken him to the er, but I would have felt awful if the psycho dvm was the one to do it. Maybe the addendum will give me some more answers, I hope so.

The only take away from all of this is I will never trust any of these dvm anymore.

I just wonder if it’s worth having my cats because I have to deal with all these horrible people- seriously that is how badly traumatized I am from this and from what happened to my father also.

I also need to find a new Dvm immediately because Quinn and Zena have been coughing or sneezing a bit. They don’t seem sick. The last thing I want to have to deal with now is finding another veterinarian who I will have to try to trust on some level.

I’m scared that they could all maybe have toxoplasmosis. Supposedly that is something that most cats will just overcome on their own unless they have some immune disease going on. Merlin was tested numerous times for FIV and FELV and it was always negative. I asked Cornell to figure out if he had FIP and they don’t seem to have done that. I wonder why?

I am wondering if I could have toxoplasmosis too because I have something going on with one of my eyes and I read that can cause symptoms like that as well, I don’t know what to think about any of this really.

Yesterday when I woke up from sleeping after eating, Quinn and then Zena had a mouse cornered. I locked them away and the mouse escaped behind the refrigerator. I think it’s time to get our pest control in to try and get rid of the mice. I have tried to do that for years, but they always seem to keep coming back no matter what I do. I don’t know what can safely be done without endangering the cats.

We have been inundated with Chinese crickets in the garage and I had them come in and set some baits outside because I did not want to spray inside.

I read about them because I was wondering if eating them could’ve affected Merlin but it says they’re not toxic if cats eat them, and they don’t seem to cause disease in cats.

 

[Stormy accepts you]

Rest easy, gentle wizard. You cast your spell upon your friend, now it’s time for a new spell. Guard your human well. Remind them all you remember is the love. That was the true magic, and you had it.