I feel like it's always ages between my posts. Sigh. Such is that of a busy life.
Since there's been so many people updating on what's been going on in their lives, I figured I'd jump in an give a bit of an update as well. I've not been around nearly as much as I'd like. So, I am just trying to catch up. And, since I know there may have been some individuals wondering where I've been, I feel as though I owe you all an update as well.
Work has been taking up a tremendous amount of my time. Which is good. Trust me, I'm not complaining -- I am so thankful to have a job that I love as well as the paycheck that comes along with it. I've been blessed with a raise at the end of last year based on performance (but out of the blue as it did not come attached to my review which should come in March). We did self reviews in November where we had to present ourselves to our supervisors and to the corporate "team" and then received ratings in January. According to my managers, I "exceeded expectations" and I have been receiving praise and recognition on a regular basis both before and since then. I'm grateful for that, of course, but it's also proven to be stressful. I've often felt as though I was placed on a pedestal since some of the others I work with have been difficult. And, because of that stress with my coworkers, I've felt like that pedestal has been purposely shaken in order to knock me off. I'm having a hard time accepting that I am a good employee and I am struggling even more with trying to maintain that spot at the top, so to speak. Along with that stress, I've also been putting in long hours. I regularly work 10+ hour shifts plus loads of overtime. There were a number of days last week that I worked 14+ hours. In fact, it's a rarity for me to work anything less than 10 hours. And, my shifts are often closing at 7:30pm (read: I leave no earlier than 8:30pm and often far later) and then opening back at 6:30am the next morning. So, that means I'm often falling over myself once I get home. I fall asleep on the sofa more often than not and veg out on my days off. Again, I'm not complaining as I do love my job. But, it is exhausting sometimes. Okay, a lot of the time.
Along with work issues, my health issues have kept me busy. My diagnosis was changed from Type II Diabetes to Type I. And, since November, I've been hospitalized in the ICU with ketoacidosis 5 times. Every time I have a slight infection, my sugar jumps and I can't get it down with reasonable measures. And, because of my crazy schedule and weak immune system, I am always fighting some sort of infection off. Since I do struggle with an eating disorder, that also plays a part in my health concerns. I am doing the best I can, but, apparently, it's not always enough. My diabetes has really changed my life in these last 8 months and I cannot believe how far down it's taken me. Now that I am properly diagnosed, I have more hope since my medications and insulin is better managed. But, it's been a difficult road. I also deal with a chronic issue that also causes me pain and discomfort on a regular basis. And, sometimes, it feels as though my conditions together create the perfect storm. I get resentful, angry, and upset sometimes, but I try to remain positive and take each day as it comes. My job has been understanding, but I've also bent backwards in order to keep the situation under wraps. Two weeks ago, I was in the ICU with ketoacidosis following a UTI and had my doctor discharge me just in time for me to find myself at work for a 12 hour shift and a 3 day long weekend at work. Thankfully, throughout everything, the bright spot has been that I am now insured. But, it's hard nonetheless.
I feel as though my post has been overwhelmingly negative and I do not want that to be the case. Despite everything, I am happy. I am grateful for everything I have -- despite what I may need to go through in order to maintain it. I may be sick, tired, or overwhelmed, but I am also thankful. And, I want to share that with everyone both here and directly in my life.
I should also mention that everyone else in my life is doing well too. My 5 (yes, five!) kitties are doing fantastically. Guinness has fit into our lives seamlessly. The dogs are also well and, while I just lost my hamster, Harley Quinn, yesterday, the others are hanging in -- including the gerbils, mice, and my geckos (leopard, crested, and gargoyle). But, that's for another post.
Now that I'm feeling well and am managing everything in a healthy way, I should be able to be around much more often. I've missed you all so much! I've missed TCS so much!
Since there's been so many people updating on what's been going on in their lives, I figured I'd jump in an give a bit of an update as well. I've not been around nearly as much as I'd like. So, I am just trying to catch up. And, since I know there may have been some individuals wondering where I've been, I feel as though I owe you all an update as well.
Work has been taking up a tremendous amount of my time. Which is good. Trust me, I'm not complaining -- I am so thankful to have a job that I love as well as the paycheck that comes along with it. I've been blessed with a raise at the end of last year based on performance (but out of the blue as it did not come attached to my review which should come in March). We did self reviews in November where we had to present ourselves to our supervisors and to the corporate "team" and then received ratings in January. According to my managers, I "exceeded expectations" and I have been receiving praise and recognition on a regular basis both before and since then. I'm grateful for that, of course, but it's also proven to be stressful. I've often felt as though I was placed on a pedestal since some of the others I work with have been difficult. And, because of that stress with my coworkers, I've felt like that pedestal has been purposely shaken in order to knock me off. I'm having a hard time accepting that I am a good employee and I am struggling even more with trying to maintain that spot at the top, so to speak. Along with that stress, I've also been putting in long hours. I regularly work 10+ hour shifts plus loads of overtime. There were a number of days last week that I worked 14+ hours. In fact, it's a rarity for me to work anything less than 10 hours. And, my shifts are often closing at 7:30pm (read: I leave no earlier than 8:30pm and often far later) and then opening back at 6:30am the next morning. So, that means I'm often falling over myself once I get home. I fall asleep on the sofa more often than not and veg out on my days off. Again, I'm not complaining as I do love my job. But, it is exhausting sometimes. Okay, a lot of the time.
Along with work issues, my health issues have kept me busy. My diagnosis was changed from Type II Diabetes to Type I. And, since November, I've been hospitalized in the ICU with ketoacidosis 5 times. Every time I have a slight infection, my sugar jumps and I can't get it down with reasonable measures. And, because of my crazy schedule and weak immune system, I am always fighting some sort of infection off. Since I do struggle with an eating disorder, that also plays a part in my health concerns. I am doing the best I can, but, apparently, it's not always enough. My diabetes has really changed my life in these last 8 months and I cannot believe how far down it's taken me. Now that I am properly diagnosed, I have more hope since my medications and insulin is better managed. But, it's been a difficult road. I also deal with a chronic issue that also causes me pain and discomfort on a regular basis. And, sometimes, it feels as though my conditions together create the perfect storm. I get resentful, angry, and upset sometimes, but I try to remain positive and take each day as it comes. My job has been understanding, but I've also bent backwards in order to keep the situation under wraps. Two weeks ago, I was in the ICU with ketoacidosis following a UTI and had my doctor discharge me just in time for me to find myself at work for a 12 hour shift and a 3 day long weekend at work. Thankfully, throughout everything, the bright spot has been that I am now insured. But, it's hard nonetheless.
I feel as though my post has been overwhelmingly negative and I do not want that to be the case. Despite everything, I am happy. I am grateful for everything I have -- despite what I may need to go through in order to maintain it. I may be sick, tired, or overwhelmed, but I am also thankful. And, I want to share that with everyone both here and directly in my life.
I should also mention that everyone else in my life is doing well too. My 5 (yes, five!) kitties are doing fantastically. Guinness has fit into our lives seamlessly. The dogs are also well and, while I just lost my hamster, Harley Quinn, yesterday, the others are hanging in -- including the gerbils, mice, and my geckos (leopard, crested, and gargoyle). But, that's for another post.
Now that I'm feeling well and am managing everything in a healthy way, I should be able to be around much more often. I've missed you all so much! I've missed TCS so much!