It's Hard Not Knowing.

I lost my cat Leia (Lymsleia) a while ago. I live outside of town, but not super far in the wild. I would let my two cats go outside every so-often, they really seemed to like it. They never really went out of the yard or anything. Leia was a scardy cat and shy so I never expected that one day she would just not return. She was even skiddish around her humans, let alone strangers.... I don't know for sure if she has crossed the rainbow bridge, but part of me hopes she did because if not she had to be so scared. She hates storms and it stormed all week after she disappeared... I feel like a bad person for 'hoping' she has passed, but I feel like it would be better than being lost and scared in a thunderstorm or 'kidnapped' by a stranger? Maybe I am just being selfish... She helped me through tough times... I had some bad depression but she got me out of bed because I needed to feed her. She was not 'perfect' but she was loved. I feel like it is my fault because I let her go outside... I really miss her.

You are right. Not knowing is worse than anything. I am so sorry. I can only hope that, where ever she is, she is happy, and loved, whether that is in someone's home, or at the bridge. My heart with yours.

Mamanyt1953 said:

You are right. Not knowing is worse than anything. I am so sorry. I can only hope that, where ever she is, she is happy, and loved, whether that is in someone's home, or at the bridge. My heart with yours.

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thank you <3

Sending you a friendly hug.
I know how terrifying it is to lost a fur companion, and just like you I am hoping that Leia is in a good place or maybe found a new loving family to take good care of her.

You actually know. You know that she either:
a) cross the rainbow bridge
b) roamed away - this is genetic to cats
c) adopted by another human
d) choose to be feral.

Lets then turn to the human world. When human babies grow up and left the nest for studies - or for work, as the case may be - we are sad, but think it is normal, it is the path of life. We think what is the bet for our children, in the manner they conceive the best, not ourselves. If a boy wants to be soldier, and passes in a war, that is because it was the boy's decision to be a soldier and we must respect this decision. Or the opposite: he can choose to stay home.

The same applies to cats- whatever decision the cat made, it is the best for her. Whatever happened to her, it is good, because it follows her decision. Whatever her Faith is, is for her good and we are not allowed to know the reasons.

I agree, the not knowing is the worst, but it would still be a good idea to ask around at the neighbors (even far away ones) and contact your local humane society, just in case.....
Sometimes we just never will get answers. A coyote, a pack of dogs, a horned owl, an eagle could have been present. In any case you love and miss her and it is very normal to feel such sadness. My heart goes out to you. I hope you can find comfort in knowing she was out and doing what she loved, and your wonderful memories will provide a link with her love. The bond you formed is spiritual, so eternal. "Death cannot take that which never dies"....
Thank you for letting others know about this wonderful little girl, now she will be thought of by many, as she deserves. Carry her legacy of love and friendship forward into your own future, and in this way she lives on through you. She loved life and would never want you to be so sad because of her. Go forward as you would have wanted her to live if you were the first to go, not in perpetual sadness, but embracing life and the wonders it brings. she would want no less.
I'll keep you all in my thoughts and prayers, sometimes it helps to just let your emotions spill out with others, do not hesitate to come here to share your sorrow with those who can empathize. To share sorrow is to lessen it's burden. take care and kiss that remaining little one, there is sorrow there too, although they accept it as a part of life better then we do....Sweet Leia. Wherever you are... may the good Lord watch over you and keep you, until you meet again!

I have that same feeling about a cat i used to look after named Atlas, he was sick at one point with an abcess and he was treated at the vet. He wasnt allowed inside as he was semi feral but was becoming more domesticated as he was able to sleep on my lap if he chose to. While he still had that abcess he was healing and one night he came home with a slight shivering symptom but wanted to lay on my lap all the time, that same night he was fine and took off like his usual self and then never came back i searched everywhere for him with no luck. 6 months later i beleived i saw him down the street sitting on the fence , i think it was him as he had all the same patterns and size, i went to go to find him but he was gone and i have never seen him again since the people down the street moved houses. I am hoping that he chose to live with them and he moved with them. It truly sucks not knowing what really happened to him, but i am praying to god that he is being looked after by someone becuase underneath all his feral behaivour he was really sweet cat when he was tamed . Maybe god asked him to come to me so that i would tame him down so that he would be able to be looked after the neighbours.

Thank you guys, this helps a lot. I know Lusi was missing her because she kept looking for her for a good while. I have never had a cat mourn like that. We did post online and ask around to our neighbors with no luck. Neighbors have seen coyotes around lately so I fear that is what happened.

We did get a 2nd kitten that bonded with Lusi very fast, and recently accidentally got a 3rd lol. So as bad as it was to lose her, we have two cats we would not likely have if we had her.

I still feel bad that I let them out where they could get hurt but they really seemed to like it. Leia would even cry at the door ( and for such a quiet and shy cat that was rare. She usually just slept in the window or her bed) I think going outside was Leia's favorite thing because I didn't often see her do much else, let alone " ask" for it.

to your new babies!

It may be silly but I kinda feel Leia is watching over these furbabies. I can't find it but there is a poem that is something like " will of the house pet" in the POV of a housepet leaving their humans, home, toys etc to a pet in need. Something like "don't say you will never have another pet because the pain is too much, instead take in another pet in need"

Leia, wherever you are, I pray you find your way home very soon. Do not be scared. Take those little steps, one paw at a time - and soon you will find yourself in the comfort of your loving home where your human waits for you.

Chibi-Miki13 , do not lose hope. Have faith she is still out there and also may be looking for you, or already taken by a loving home. It really is difficult "not knowing", but at least to provide you some consolation just think of her as someplace where she is safe, warm, and loved.

Hang in there.