Why?

Me again Shybaby is doing well. Still in heat? Who knows but has remained very visible and friendly. She loves to be petted with the feather wand. Purrs loudly when I do it and I can occasionally slip in a pat or 2 as she is walking away from rubbing on me. She now circles my legs and rubs as I sit in my office chair and doesn’t run to her hiding spot anymore when I stand up and walk towards her or enter the office. She rubs against me when i am sitting on the floor too. That’s when I like to sneak in the pets. She is still overall skittish and jumpy but definitely not the same cat from a couple weeks ago. She plays so much more with me and on her own now so I know she is feeling more comfortable. BUT every now and then she will fixate on my hand and pop me. She is not playing when she does it though I can tell by the look she gives me. And I’m not doing anything different when she does it. Thankfully her claws have not been out lately. Why is she doing this and how can I discourage it? She loves the feather wand pets so much I just know she wants to be petted but is still afraid.

Hi. I think it all sounds good! The occasional "fixation and pop", to me anyway, would seem to be the result of her suddenly realizing she let her guard down a little too much for her current comfort level. She is just reminding you that she still feels the need to be cautious. I'd let it play out a couple of more weeks before you get too concerned!!

Now that you know the look, just slowly (no sudden moves) back off a bit.

I have had more than one do that. In particular, a male named BJ. He was just trying to communicate with me. It worked! Lol I got the message that he still needed more from me. More time, more attention, sometimes more food. As he grew more secure and we got to know each other on a deeper level, including starting to have him climb in my lap as I sat on the floor, he did that less and less. Rarely now he will do that if one of the other cats makes him nervous. He has turned into the most loving and snuggly kitty of all. In the beginning , I never would have pictured him as a total lap cat. Far from it. Each kitty is different but I think you’ve made huge progress and that it will continue. I think it wonderful that she is starting to run against your legs and is less fearful. Thanks so much for being her friend. The love will just keep growing.

Thank you both for responding. I agree huge progress by this tough tough little girl! She goes for her spay on April 2 next week. Since I still can’t technically handle her she will have to go in a trap. How much do you think the trauma of all that is going to set her back? Should I reschedule her appointment for next month and see if she progresses to handling so I don’t have to use the trap (it’s the only way they will take her if not able to be handled) and can use a carrier?? My gut says no get her spayed now. Thoughts?

I think, go ahead and get her spayed now.
There may be a bit of a setback, but time and patience will bring her back

As much as it kills me to say it, go ahead and have her spayed (I know how I would feel). The amount of trauma that she may or may not experience is worth getting her spayed and could likely be offset by getting rid of the related hormones. She will be in your loving care while recovering (yes?), so that will help her know you are taking care of her needs. Good luck!!

Oh yes she is not going anywhere she will recover here and she is my 10th and final inside kitty.

So glad to hear Shabby continues to do so well!!!! Such progress in (I know it may not always feel like this) such a short time! My bet is she rebounds VERY quickly after the spay (we'll all keep fingers and toes crossed that it works that way for her!). SO very rarely have I had a cat "backtrack" much as far as socialization - - - and I'm trying to think if I've ever had one who "blamed me" (I know cats don't actually do that) afterward for even a bit. Granted, sometimes the VERY terrified ones that we've TNR'd in our neighborhood have run like the wind from our yard upon release.....but within 24 hours (or less) 99.99999% of them are back for the next meal! (It's almost like we can see the really skittish ones sitting in our shrubs afterward - around dinner time - looking at us, saying "was that YOU who released me from that trap? I KNOW you're then who gives me kitty treats and yummy stuff - so don't THINK it would be you.....you know what - if it was you, the buffet's so good at your place I think I'll take my chances."

So yes - - - I say 110% go ahead and get her spayed at the previously set-up time. (I forgot - are you going to micro-chip her when they do that? Or will they even do that? Our clinic doesn't - -- and SOOOOO wish they did!). The spay may even help the "bopping" you're getting!

She's probably got her own reason for the hand fixation and "bopping" (I'm guessing no one at your place does "hand play" with her? I've tried to convince hubby for - well, 17 years now - that even the smallest about of "hand play" can quickly ingrain that "your hand's a toy." The fact her claws aren't out when she does it is a great sign!!!

Have you tried doing a high-pitched "yip" or "ouch" when she does it? I do that (I started doing it more frequently when we had bottle babies or older orphans - - -particuarly ones without siblings). It definitely - with the right amount of "startle factor" and a sudden stopping of any hand movement - and my luck with it has been pretty much 100% when I start using that (if I have to). It's just enough like a sibling would do to her if she was playing with one - -- to say "stop - that hurts!" so she'd know when to back off. I've rarely had that not work.

Keep us posted on the spay!!!!!! Little boy - - now girl - -- - - has turned into such a big sweetie!!!!! Just think - YOU did that! Pat yourself on the back on this one!

FeebysOwner said:

Hi. I think it all sounds good! The occasional "fixation and pop", to me anyway, would seem to be the result of her suddenly realizing she let her guard down a little too much for her current comfort level. She is just reminding you that she still feels the need to be cautious

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~ I think you are a good kitty psychologist ! Sometimes I wonder if it's easier to figure out our pets behavior than people ...

JamesCalifornia said:

~ I think you are a good kitty psychologist ! Sometimes I wonder if it's easier to figure out our pets behavior than people ...

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Thanks! That could be debated either way. But, we do know that we don't have to factor in certain "human traits" when we assess our kitties!

From my experience, setbacks are short-lived. Unlike people, cats don't hold grudges. Get the spay done now. Her hormones may be out of whack for a bit and she may be sore for several days and not herself, but don't take this personally.

Some cats are have very sensitive skin and easily get overstimulated with petting, even with a wand. Her popping you may be her way of telling you she's has enough. Over time, these kinds of habits usually stop as cats become more socialized. It sounds like she's making great progress.