My little Pumpkin died today

[Kwik]

The love and devotion of a cat is a special thing. Pumpkin still loves you, he's just not here in the physical form. And remember, you have many friends here on TCS who care about you as well!

I was going to comment to Diana & say- " I truly care about you" because I do BUT I think I know what she means-?

I truly care about you D dianajune

 

[dianajune]

The love and devotion of a cat is a special thing. Pumpkin still loves you, he's just not here in the physical form. And remember, you have many friends here on TCS who care about you as well!

Thank you!

 

[dianajune]

I was going to comment to Diana & say- " I truly care about you" because I do BUT I think I know what she means-?

I truly care about you D dianajune

Thank you Kwik! I care about you as well! I appreciate everyone here at TCS. You're all like the family I always wanted to have!

 

[Kwik]

 

[dianajune]

I am struggling a lot with my loss today. This Saturday will mark the one month anniversary of Pumpkin's death and I still feel responsible even though the vet told me there was nothing I could have done to stop this.

The vet who did his heart tests pretty much said the same thing.

I wish that I asked for a necropsy but it's too late now. The thought did occur to me however, to contact his vet again and ask for a copy of Pumpkin's medical records. I don't want to be a pita but I desperately need closure. I'm still having a very difficult time accepting what happened.

In other words, I am a hot mess and can't find any peace. Is it normal to feel this way almost a month after the death of a pet?

 

[Mamanyt1953]

It is perfectly normal to feel this way a month after the death of ANY loved one. No matter how many legs they have. It takes time. How much time? Well, as long as it takes. Different for every person, and for every loss. And it seems to me that the longer/harder we had to fight for them, the longer it takes.

Having had necropsies done, and not done, I am convinced now that no matter what they may reveal, it does NOT take away the "I SHOULD HAVE..." at all. Because we always return to the, "If I had known/I should have known," when, in fact, we just cannot know what we do not know, and could not have known until a necropsy was done.

 

[dianajune]

It is perfectly normal to feel this way a month after the death of ANY loved one. No matter how many legs they have. It takes time. How much time? Well, as long as it takes. Different for every person, and for every loss. And it seems to me that the longer/harder we had to fight for them, the longer it takes.

Having had necropsies done, and not done, I am convinced now that no matter what they may reveal, it does NOT take away the "I SHOULD HAVE..." at all. Because we always return to the, "If I had known/I should have known," when, in fact, we just cannot know what we do not know, and could not have known until a necropsy was done.

I just hope that my baby knew that I loved him and still do, even though death now separates us. We were together for over 11 years and went through much adversity together (my health issues, his, dangerous neighbours where we used to live, etc).

Getting back to his medical records, I probably won't ask for them. Anything important has already been discussed. I just wish the pain of losing him would go away. I can't handle this anymore.

Thank you!

 

[Kwik]

I just hope that my baby knew that I loved him and still do, even though death now separates us. We were together for over 11 years and went through much adversity together (my health issues, his, dangerous neighbours where we used to live, etc).

Getting back to his medical records, I probably won't ask for them. Anything important has already been discussed. I just wish the pain of losing him would go away. I can't handle this anymore.

Thank you!

Of course he knew he was(is) loved-no doubt ,just by the way he was with you is proof of that- you don't have a cat respond to a person and bond with them as he did with you if they don't feel love

I don't know if some of us ever get real closure,I know eventually you come to accept more and adjust better- some people seem to move on with their lives more quickly than others- maybe they just don't show it or say how they feel,I don't really know as everyone has their own time line to process their grief and tp coping with loss....

I'm probably not a good example of " moving on" qith your life or "getting closure" but as Mamanyt1953 has said that the open wounds,,that raw fresh pain does scab over,the pain becomes less intense in time and then you have a scar,a wound that healed but the scar remains and we never forget

A month is a really short time,you had over a decade with Pumpkin-thats a really long time.Diana,it's perfectly normal to feel as you do

 

[rubysmama]

I am struggling a lot with my loss today. This Saturday will mark the one month anniversary of Pumpkin's death and I still feel responsible even though the vet told me there was nothing I could have done to stop this.

The vet who did his heart tests pretty much said the same thing.

I wish that I asked for a necropsy but it's too late now. The thought did occur to me however, to contact his vet again and ask for a copy of Pumpkin's medical records. I don't want to be a pita but I desperately need closure. I'm still having a very difficult time accepting what happened.

In other words, I am a hot mess and can't find any peace. Is it normal to feel this way almost a month after the death of a pet?

Tomorrow will be 2 weeks since I lost my Ruby, so I'm only halfway as far along as you are, but I am still missing her terribly, and having thoughts of "should I have done something differently, or sooner". So I think I know a bit of how you're feeling. I do believe it will get better in time. I also believe feeling this way is normal, as for most of us, our pets are as much members of our family as the humans.

 

[dianajune]

Tomorrow will be 2 weeks since I lost my Ruby, so I'm only halfway as far along as you are, but I am still missing her terribly, and having thoughts of "should I have done something differently, or sooner". So I think I know a bit of how you're feeling. I do believe it will get better in time. I also believe feeling this way is normal, as for most of us, our pets are as much members of our family as the humans.

Pumpkin was much better to me and closer to me than anyone else in my family. He was my baby. I was responsible for his care for more than 11 years. That's a long time. We bonded soon after we met before I adopted him.

QE2 once said that grief is the price we pay for love. Her Late Majesty said this after the 9/11 attacks but it still holds true, regardless of the circumstances.

I wish there was something I could do or say to take away your pain.

 

[rubysmama]

I wish there was something I could do or say to take away your pain.

Hopefully time will help for both of us.