Young Kitten, Going away on Vacation, need advice.

[catquestions232]

Hey All!

A few weeks ago I got my first ever kitten at 10 weeks old.  I have now had her for about 4 or 5 weeks and she awesome (will admit I kinda hated her at first due to all the things she was doing).   It has  taken a while, but she is finally seeming to start to like me.  She will purr when I pick her up and come jump on my lap when I'm on the computer.  Its super cute.  She also greets me at the door when I come home.  (She is a Siberian by the way, if you would like, ask me to post  some pics and I will post some!)  

Now I know, from experience and from your advice, that  cats take time to become adjusted to you and grow affectionate.  My question is whether or not  it is a bad idea  to take a 1 week trip this December.  She will be about 18 or 19 weeks old at that point.  I got the opportunity to go to Vienna, Austria and I've heard its beautiful in December.

There are several solutions for  her placement while I'm gone.  One, she could stay at my gf's friend's house.  She has  a grown cat though and I have never introduced her to the kitten (shots are not  complete as of yet).  I really don't want a situation where the cat hurts my kitten though.

Two, I could leave her in my old bedroom at my parent's house.  It is quite large and totally kitten proof.  The problem is she would be in one room for the duration of the week.  My dad would play with her throughout the day, but I'm nervous she wouldnt appreciate being stuck in one room.  She does like my dad though and purrs loudly when he pets her.    I cant  let her free roam his house because they have a dog (a cockapoo).  The dog is SUUUUPER sweet  and gentle (except to chipmunks)...which has me a bit scared.  I took the kitten to my parents house and left her in the carrier  and let my dog approach and look in.  I kept it very calm and reassured her the whole time and she was very gentle and calm.  I then took the kitten out and held her so that the dog would know the kitten is something I care about and once again spoke calmly and assuringly.  The dog seemed very calm....but the kitten on the other hand...not  so much.  She actually growled and hissed at the dog and tried to leap at her!  Dog got scared and wouldn't come back near her.  I put her back in the carrier and if dog came anywhere near she growled and hissed again.  I'm nervous that if I let the kitten on the floor, she may attack the dog and the dog may defend herself to the kitten's and my own's dismay =/.  Am i doing the socializing wrong or would it just take many visits?  Is there enough time to socialize them between now and December 16th?  Their dog is actually really good with little dogs, in fact she leaves them alone and doesnt really care to play with them lol, they are too energetic for her and she only likes big dogs ( she's so calm its  catlike haha....except with chipmunks).  Also, one side point is that the dog did shake a chipmunk to death at one point.  I know this is instinctual and I dont hate her for it, but I'm nervous this instinct could translate to a kitten.  She has NEVER shown aggression to  other small dogs, or even when I tried to let her  meet the kitten.  

Three, I leave her at my apartment for the week and ask my neighbor (who has a cat) to stop in and feed her  each day.  The only issue with this is she would be alone for most of the day/week and might get lonely.  Also, though he seems super sweet, I dont know him very well and am not sure how I feel about giving him a key to my apartment.  This also assumes he will be around and willing to feed her.

My main concern with the trip is that when I come back the kitten  will not be affectionate or personable anymore.  It took basically 4 or 5 weeks to get her to this point and I dont want to  lose that progress.  At this age, can that time apart be a bad thing for our relationship?  Is it fixable or would it  result  in  a kitten that is stressed out, flighty and wants nothing to do with me as she gets older?  I dont want to have to tell my gf we cant go due to the kitten (she wasn't super happy about getting her but did it for me...now she really likes her but I dont want to giver her a reason for resentment).

Please help me out.  I know I wrote a novel, but I tend to obsess about things I care about.  If you need any extra clarification, please let me know and I would be happy to provide it!

 

[Kieka]

I'd go with option one or two. 

1. As to the home with another cat. Kittens usually don't have problems with cats; its the other way around. If you've already started on shots and the resident has shots you'll be fine on that front. Just let the person know that if there are problems you are fine with them having to lock the kitty in the bathroom while your gone. The kitten would still get more attention than home alone and hear sounds. 

2. I understand your worry with the dog but if you take time to introduce them between now and then it should be fine. By 18-19 weeks your kitten should be about 4-5 pounds and able to hold its own if the dog gives it trouble; my sister in laws 13 pounds cat swiped her 100 pounds pit bulls nose once and the pit bull now gives the cat space. If the dog in your case is giving the kitten space the hissing is working in telling the dog to back off. I'd not worry about the hissing and allow them to interact; since you are saying the dog is mellow. Let the kitten get it out of its system and learn to be around the dog and things will be fine. 

3. At that age kittens want interaction and to play so being alone all day in an apartment probably wouldn't be best.... but if the friends cat doesn't like kittens and you are unsure about the dog as it gets closer it wouldn't be horrible. Lots of toys, make sure things can't fall or tip over (seriously, like lay chairs on their side if the kitten could knock them over I had a friend whose kitten got crushed by a chair it somehow tipped while she was gone overnight), and the kitten will survive. 

4. Does your vet board or is there a local cat boarding place nearby? It's not an option for all cats but my cat recently was hospitalized for an injury and he was fine being there. The techs checked on him throughout the day and they put him in the main exam room. He apparently had a blast watching everything they did in there. My vet also keeps their kitten boarders in the main waiting room so they get interaction from everyone who comes in throughout the day (cat only vet). But especially since you are talking a kitten and everyone loves a cute kitten it would probably get attention throughout the day without worry about other animal interactions. 

It really depends on you and whats best knowing your kitten. Personally, if you feel comfortable with dog interactions by that time; I'd go that way and just ask your dad not to leave the kitten unsupervised with the dog because of the chipmunk incident and fear or repeat (and don't go that route if dad seems hesitant or brushes you off). If you don't feel comfortable either the friends house or neighbor are acceptable (I lean more towards friend just because of age, if the kitten was older I'd do neighbor). 

 

[catquestions232]

Great reply!!

1.  So the cat would not hurt her?  And the only other thing is I dont really like how my gf's friend plays with her.  She basically does things to annoy her on purpose so that shes desensitized...which I dont really agree with.  I dont like holding my kitten for too long once she wants to get away, whereas my gf's friend will hang on to her and say she has to get used to it...She also does dumb things like hold her over her head etc etc...things i dont think a kitten likes. 

2. should i actually let the kitten down around the dog?  Will the dog every attack her if them alone?  Or will she leave her be since I showed her the kitten is ok?  Like I said, the dog is mellow (except with chipmunks).  There was one time a kitten came to my back porch though and the dog ran at the door barking.  I think it is a territorial thing, if an animal is in the yard that we havent explciitly shown is ok to be there, she freaks out.  Now that I showed her the kitten is ok, I think she understands.  Just a little nervous if they are alone.

3.  Yeah I kinda of agree this isnt the best option.  As far as the chair, should I be laying chairs down while I am at work as well?  If so, how long should I do this for?  She actually knocked over one of the kitchen chairs the other day.

4. I could check if the vet boards.  Didn't think of that, just thought it might be stressful for her.

One other thing, will she still be affectionate with me as she is finally being now (after about 5 weeks) or will she revert back to running away and not wanting my interaction?  I am just nervous on how much these early weeks matter for our relationship.  If this is the case, I would skip the vacation, even though itd stink.

 

[Kieka]

1. Sounds like not the best option. Older cats its depends on personality how they react to kittens. If the friend is comfortable I would hope she has experience; I wouldn't pet sit a kitten in my home I know my cats wouldn't react well. 

2. Dogs can get along wonderfully with cats, especially kittens. Yes, let the kitten on the floor around the dog they need to learn each others smells and interact if they are going to get along (assuming that is the goal). The kitten will either stand up for itself and hiss or not. If it doesn't you have to tell the dog no and set the limits on what is good behavior with the kitten and you want to establish the kitten as the dominate one in the relationship to prevent the dog from messing with the kitten. The kitten though will likely hiss and hop around but likely won't attack the dog, its usually just all show. Once they've been around each other supervised a few times you'll have a better feel for it and should know if you can leave them alone together. With the time you have I'd still say supervised only while you are gone but when the kitten gets older they would be fine unsupervised (assuming their time together is positive and dog respects the cat). I had a cat once who would actively attack dogs walking past our house (he was super protective of me so it only happened when I was around). We are talking large dogs too. To the point that people started crossing the street and walking on the other side past our house if I was outside. My sisters cat rules a home with 2 large pitbulls who would happily tear apart any small animals who fell into their yard. Cats have attitude to spare and many have not problem standing up for themselves when their humans are around or they are defending their area. As long as the dog isn't overly aggressive they should be able to work it out. 

3. The chair thing is just me being paranoid. We still don't know how the kitten knocked over the chair. It's not a worry if you have lighter chairs but my friends chair had some heavy metal on the top and that was what caught her kitten (basically a top heavy chair). I wouldn't worry about it when you are at work. My guess is the kitten was just nervous and anxious when it happened and jumped off the chair at an odd angle most likely startled too (my friend kept her kitten in a garage and it was alone for long periods of time, something was bound to happen, I told her that multiple times to no avail). I'd probably do it if I was leaving my kitten for an extended period of time just because they can be like kids and get in trouble when they are bored. But normal daytime leaving shouldn't lead to extreme behavior and the bigger the kitten gets the less risk. If you are going to leave her home for the whole week, yes I'd do it then just for peace of mind. But no, not everyday. But added with the lack of not knowing the neighbor well and her age I'd say not this time. But probably start talking more to the neighbor and see if you can get to know them better for next time when your kitten is older. Maybe start doing cat watching for each other?

4. I would never board my girl, Rocket, she is too skittish, too jumpy and does poorly with new situations. I also couldn't get someone to come in and feed her because she'd hide. Someone would just be coming over to clean the mysteriously self-filling litter box and self-emptying food/water dish with that cat (former feral and she only allows 3 of us to pet her). Link though loved watching the people walk around and what was happening. He doesn't like it when new people come to my house and usually hides on my bed (not under it, just glares from my bedroom at people). But some combo of him being medicated and seeing people walking around within the safety of the cage was soothing to him. I know the techs all loved him and were saying goodbye. I called for his followup yesterday and I just had to say his name and receptionist knew who I was talking about. But its also a small cat only practice. I've also had to board two cats in the past and they did not handle it well; but they also didn't like strangers and were 5 years old. For you, shes a kitten and kitten usually handle changes better than older cats. So she could be just fine being boarded and enjoy the attention of new people and the newness of it all. It really depends on her temperament.

After your response, I am leaning towards 2 if you can get a good feel for the relationship with the dog OR your Dad agrees to no unsupervised time with the dog. All things considered it would probably be your best option even if the kitten is alone in the room most of the day you'd feel more comfortable with the person and someone would at least be within hearing distance. 

 

[catquestions232]

Great advice Kieka! I think you are right about number 2 as well.  Thankyou so much!  And yes I am a bit paranoid ahah, my girlfriend hates it.

The one other thing I didnt see an answer for was that last point.

"One other thing, will she still be affectionate with me as she is finally being now (after about 5 weeks) or will she revert back to running away and not wanting my interaction?  I am just nervous on how much these early weeks matter for our relationship.  If this is the case, I would skip the vacation, even though itd stink."

Is this a possible concern?  It took a lot of work to get her to like me lol.

 

[Kieka]

Opps, sorry.

I had a kitten who was 10 weeks old and had only been with us for 3 weeks at that point. We left for 4 days and when we came back nothing was different with regards to how she felt about us. Link is 2.5 years old, he was missing for 4 days and hospitalized for 5 days. I did visit him at the vet but if anything hes been more clingy since he came home. My parents are retired and leave for a month at a time. I watch their cat while they are gone and he usually is a little standoffish for 24 hours when they get back. Her cat is a 3.5 year old bottle baby she got at 4 weeks old, her first month trip was when he was 12 weeks olds and no problems. He gives her the cold shoulder for a day then falls back into routine of following her around.

There might be an inital, "who are you?" Or "rude, you abandoned me" when you get back. But for the most part you should be fine a week really isn't that long. Leave a sweatshirt, pillow, blanket or something with your scent for her so she still has your smell to help lessen the inital reaction.

 

[MoochNNoodles]

I think; based on the options you've given, that your parents place would be best for her.  It sounds like she can get the most attention and be safe there.  If you decide to let her have run of their house; you could set your old room up as her safe space.  A baby gate can be good to keep the dog out of there while keeping the door open.  Tension mounted gates can be installed several inches off the floor to let her go under; but not the dog.  Bring her usual food and water bowls and litter box.  

I had to leave my girls at my mother's house for a week once.  Because she already has cats (as well as a dog) we set them up in my old room and Mom visited them several times a day.  Cats generally take too long to introduce to make going through that process worth it.  (Which is one reason I think your girlfriends house is ideal.  Cats know each other by scent so "trail meetings" can backfire too.)  We used a large piece of cardboard to set up the litter box and help contain the mess since it's a carpeted room.  I also brought along a blanket they sleep on at home and things like that.  I also leave one of my unwashed shirts out for the girls whenever we travel.  Usually I go with one I've slept in.  

When my 2 were kittens we lived closer to my mother's house so she would come by a few times a day to take care of them and play.  They had each other for company too.

 

[catquestions232]

Thankyou for all of the advice guys! I think I am going to leave her with my dad.  I actually took her over last night and the dog is scared of her lol.  The dog does nto seem to be in any way aggressive but instead playful.  She was wagging her tail and just very curious....until the cat hissed at her to back off haha.

 

[Primula]

Great reply!!

1.  So the cat would not hurt her?  And the only other thing is I dont really like how my gf's friend plays with her.  She basically does things to annoy her on purpose so that shes desensitized...which I dont really agree with.  I dont like holding my kitten for too long once she wants to get away, whereas my gf's friend will hang on to her and say she has to get used to it...She also does dumb things like hold her over her head etc etc...things i dont think a kitten likes. 

This woman sounds like a crackpot. Do not allow her to play with your kitten!

 

[catquestions232]

Agreed