Will my stray friend trust me again?

[dizkneephreek]

This is normal as he is used to the outside but nevertheless, now that he is in and I mentioned a few post up, let him get use to being indoors as this will take awhile.

One thing you can do is distract him each time he goes to the windows and doors and meow. Talk to him and reassure him. Get a cat wand and start playing with him each time he does that and that'll take his mind off about the outside for awhile and do this till he does not ask to to let out.

Please do not blame yourself. What you are doing is best for him and he'll know it eventually. This is the usual process of time that you and Elwood have to go through and it's just a phase. Give it time and give up and now that he is in, never let him out else it'll be hard to get him in the next time or there may not be the next time.

If you have the time, give this thread a read and it may encourage you :- Feral in my garage. Do keep us posted of the progress but just don't give u

Thank you for that! It's just so hard when he's by the door or window and looks at me and gives me the most pitiful meow. Honestly, a part of me misses seeing him outside happily lazing about and the routine we had. But I know both of us will eventually be much happier with him indoors. I'm just very much a creature of habit, so it really affects me when something disrupts that. Even if it's a good change that I want. But I know he's not to that point yet and we both have to hang in there until he is. Like you said, it's a process. And I have to remember it won't be exactly like this for the next few weeks or months. It will gradually get better.

 

[tabbytom]

Thank you for that! It's just so hard when he's by the door or window and looks at me and gives me the most pitiful meow. Honestly, a part of me misses seeing him outside happily lazing about and the routine we had. But I know both of us will eventually be much happier with him indoors. I'm just very much a creature of habit, so it really affects me when something disrupts that. Even if it's a good change that I want. But I know he's not to that point yet and we both have to hang in there until he is. Like you said, it's a process. And I have to remember it won't be exactly like this for the next few weeks or months. It will gradually get better.

Yes, they always look and sound pitiful but for this case, you must not give in. You have to break his wanting to go out routine.

Is that him sleeping indoors? If he is, he's kind of getting used to it. Look at the way he sleeps. If something is bothering him, he won't sleep this way and he'll be like half asleep.

Talk to him all the time. He'll understand you. Just observe in the coming days, I think he'll meow less.

 

[dizkneephreek]

Yes, they always look and sound pitiful but for this case, you must not give in. You have to break his wanting to go out routine.

Is that him sleeping indoors? Of he is, he's kind of getting used to it. Look at the way he sleeps. If something is bothering him, he won't sleep this way and he'll be like half asleep.

Talk to him all the time. He'll understand you. Just observe in the coming days, I think he'll meow less.

Yes that was him yesterday morning. I'm trying my best not to give in. It's hard... especially at night when I'm so tired and just want to sleep But I keep reminding myself this is all short term and temporary. I've been trying to talk to him in soothing whispers. I tell him all the time that he's a good boy and how good he's doing with everything.

 

[tabbytom]

Yes that was him yesterday morning. I'm trying my best not to give in. It's hard... especially at night when I'm so tired and just want to sleep But I keep reminding myself this is all short term and temporary. I've been trying to talk to him in soothing whispers. I tell him all the time that he's a good boy and how good he's doing with everything.

Keep it up this way. Give him the best assurance and comfort and love. All cats are different. I know my boy is different but I just give him the best as and when he needed it even at the sacrifice of sleep.

Praise Elwood all the time. Praise him for doing the right things. Tell him you love him very much and keep your slow eye blinks with him. My boy is a rescue and he's coming to 8 years old and everyday I talk to him telling him how much I love him and also asking him who he loves most but of cause he can't answer that but I can see that in his affectionate response. I also praise him for doing the right things and things I don't want him to do, I tell him no and I distract him.

I know you can do it but just don't give up.

 

[Kwik]

Yes that was him yesterday morning. I'm trying my best not to give in. It's hard... especially at night when I'm so tired and just want to sleep But I keep reminding myself this is all short term and temporary. I've been trying to talk to him in soothing whispers. I tell him all the time that he's a good boy and how good he's doing with everything.

Sorry I've not replied in awhile-I'm thrilled to hear your back from your trip,Elwood has been nuetered and he is officially a permanent indoor family member-YAY!

I just want to encourage you that Elwood is going to get over the desire to go out very quickly as long as you get it out of your head that it is where he'd prefer to be- lol Elwood doesn't know any better,that is what he was used to,he established a territory and was familiar with that territory-thats what makes a cat tick,familiarity.... believe me it's not about " happy" so don't think he was "happier:" living outside,that's simply untrue

As he gets more and more familiar and establishes the inside of the house as HIS territory he will no longer yearn to go out,it takes time..... you are so far ahead of tye game because Elwood has a terrific temperament,was highly likely an indoor,outdoor cat at one time and you are not going to face tye many obstacles there are with a cat that has not been socialized or has never been indoors--- basically you only need to NEVER let him out of the house -always remember that if you do it might be the last time you'd ever see him ,anything can happen- that always worked for me to never give in

4months ago I took a completely feral(F1) 7 yr old boy in- he'd never seen the inside of a house so the best approach was to confine him to an indoor enclosure (6x6x6) rather than him bouncing off walls,banging into windows and tearing the house to bits and possibly hurting himself---I had the enclosure built,a second door & hallway constructed so he cannot escape once he was released from confinement etc etc

His name is Timmy,and now I knighted him "Timmy the housecat",lol So you asked to hear others experience and whether they ever get used to being indoors.....so the answer is "Yes,absolutely"- if wildcat Timmy hardly looks out the windows and enjoys laying in the middle of the living room then any kitty will.....

He knows where the litter box is,keep it clean and he'll be fine-Id get at least one more ( 2 more preferebly) for different rooms so he always has a nearby place to go-put "Ultra" in it,DrElsys litter attractant and he'll be fine- I wouldn't pick him up and put him in it because thats not necessary once they know where it is and it might be frightening ,you don't want him to associate the box with anything unpleasant.....Just stick to routine,cats gain confidence and are creatures of habit,stick to schedules and you'll have a self assured well balanced Ellwood.....he's already fond of you and he "chose " you as his person...... you're doing a fantastic job and you can stop worrying,you are Ellwoods Blessing and he is yours,enjoy that!

 

[dizkneephreek]

Keep it up this way. Give him the best assurance and comfort and love. All cats are different. I know my boy is different but I just give him the best as and when he needed it even at the sacrifice of sleep.

Praise Elwood all the time. Praise him for doing the right things. Tell him you love him very much and keep your slow eye blinks with him. My boy is a rescue and he's coming to 8 years old and everyday I talk to him telling him how much I love him and also asking him who he loves most but of cause he can't answer that but I can see that in his affectionate response. I also praise him for doing the right things and things I don't want him to do, I tell him no and I distract him.

I know you can do it but just don't give up.

Thank you! I have started telling him how proud I am of him. He really is doing so much better than I thought he would. My supervisor is allowing me to work from home this week, so I'm grateful for that. Hopefully having a little over a full week with me here constantly will help him feel more settled before I have to go back to the office.
I have closed the window blinds downstairs. I just felt like having them open was too enticing for him to want to go out. He still tries to mess with the blinds and meows at them, but it doesn't seem as bad. I just hope that doesn't hurt in the long run when I eventually open them up again.

Sorry I've not replied in awhile-I'm thrilled to hear your back from your trip,Elwood has been nuetered and he is officially a permanent indoor family member-YAY!

I just want to encourage you that Elwood is going to get over the desire to go out very quickly as long as you get it out of your head that it is where he'd prefer to be- lol Elwood doesn't know any better,that is what he was used to,he established a territory and was familiar with that territory-thats what makes a cat tick,familiarity.... believe me it's not about " happy" so don't think he was "happier:" living outside,that's simply untrue

As he gets more and more familiar and establishes the inside of the house as HIS territory he will no longer yearn to go out,it takes time..... you are so far ahead of tye game because Elwood has a terrific temperament,was highly likely an indoor,outdoor cat at one time and you are not going to face tye many obstacles there are with a cat that has not been socialized or has never been indoors--- basically you only need to NEVER let him out of the house -always remember that if you do it might be the last time you'd ever see him ,anything can happen- that always worked for me to never give in

4months ago I took a completely feral(F1) 7 yr old boy in- he'd never seen the inside of a house so the best approach was to confine him to an indoor enclosure (6x6x6) rather than him bouncing off walls,banging into windows and tearing the house to bits and possibly hurting himself---I had the enclosure built,a second door & hallway constructed so he cannot escape once he was released from confinement etc etc

His name is Timmy,and now I knighted him "Timmy the housecat",lol So you asked to hear others experience and whether they ever get used to being indoors.....so the answer is "Yes,absolutely"- if wildcat Timmy hardly looks out the windows and enjoys laying in the middle of the living room then any kitty will.....

He knows where the litter box is,keep it clean and he'll be fine-Id get at least one more ( 2 more preferebly) for different rooms so he always has a nearby place to go-put "Ultra" in it,DrElsys litter attractant and he'll be fine- I wouldn't pick him up and put him in it because thats not necessary once they know where it is and it might be frightening ,you don't want him to associate the box with anything unpleasant.....Just stick to routine,cats gain confidence and are creatures of habit,stick to schedules and you'll have a self assured well balanced Ellwood.....he's already fond of you and he "chose " you as his person...... you're doing a fantastic job and you can stop worrying,you are Ellwoods Blessing and he is yours,enjoy that!

Thank you so much for your encouragement and sharing your story! Sounds like Timmy acclimated like a champ! And it does give me hope that Elwood will settle into his new life soon. Like you said, we're already so far past so many of the hurdles I've read about with other kitties.
I did buy some of the Cat Attract litter! I'm not sure if it helped, but he has used the litter box multiple times now and no issues. I also have a cat pheromone diffuser plugged in...I had it above his litter box, but just switched it to a plugin in the living room where he mostly hangs out, and where the back door and windows are. So maybe that will help him settle more quickly.
I have discovered when he's meowing at the window, if I brush him and stroke him with a kitty wet wipe, he seems to calm down a lot faster. I don't know if the wet wipe makes him feel like I'm grooming him or what, but he seems to really enjoy it.
I have stopped picking him up to put him in the litter box. Once he used it the first time I felt better that he knew where and what it was. So I felt there was no longer a need to place him in it.
And you're absolutely right about the territory thing. I guess that's more my concern, is that he's missing his territory and he's unhappy that he can't go explore it. I would feel sick if I let him out and something happened to him. So I don't think I would ever let him out intentionally at this point, since we've already come so far. But I do worry that the first time we open either the front or back door he'll slip out. And he's way to strong for me to hold him back. I don't know how I'll know he won't try to make a run for it though.

 

[Kwik]

Thank you! I have started telling him how proud I am of him. He really is doing so much better than I thought he would. My supervisor is allowing me to work from home this week, so I'm grateful for that. Hopefully having a little over a full week with me here constantly will help him feel more settled before I have to go back to the office.
I have closed the window blinds downstairs. I just felt like having them open was too enticing for him to want to go out. He still tries to mess with the blinds and meows at them, but it doesn't seem as bad. I just hope that doesn't hurt in the long run when I eventually open them up again.



Thank you so much for your encouragement and sharing your story! Sounds like Timmy acclimated like a champ! And it does give me hope that Elwood will settle into his new life soon. Like you said, we're already so far past so many of the hurdles I've read about with other kitties.
I did buy some of the Cat Attract litter! I'm not sure if it helped, but he has used the litter box multiple times now and no issues. I also have a cat pheromone diffuser plugged in...I had it above his litter box, but just switched it to a plugin in the living room where he mostly hangs out, and where the back door and windows are. So maybe that will help him settle more quickly.
I have discovered when he's meowing at the window, if I brush him and stroke him with a kitty wet wipe, he seems to calm down a lot faster. I don't know if the wet wipe makes him feel like I'm grooming him or what, but he seems to really enjoy it.
I have stopped picking him up to put him in the litter box. Once he used it the first time I felt better that he knew where and what it was. So I felt there was no longer a need to place him in it.
And you're absolutely right about the territory thing. I guess that's more my concern, is that he's missing his territory and he's unhappy that he can't go explore it. I would feel sick if I let him out and something happened to him. So I don't think I would ever let him out intentionally at this point, since we've already come so far. But I do worry that the first time we open either the front or back door he'll slip out. And he's way to strong for me to hold him back. I don't know how I'll know he won't try to make a run for it though.

That is a concern and you're going to have to stay on your toes,always keeping him in mind when you are entering and exiting the house to deter him from those doors...... you can purchase foldable pet play pens that come 48" high to surround the door,cats can jump that high and a very determined cat will leap that no problem but I don't believe Elllwood will be bent on looking to escape ,I believe by distracting him and staying alert to where he is when your cominh and going you can avoid any issues...... 2 sided sticky tape ,prickly underside of overturned mats and tin foil are all things cats do not like to step on.... think of ways to keep him clear of those areas by using the environment vs yelling,chasing,hand clapping,bursts of air or squirts of water.... those things only scare the cat from you,not an area..... so make those areas unpleasant to be near-thetes also products like Scratch No,Cat Away & others that smell unpleasant to a feline ......if you have a hallway you might consider a pet gate or pet net..... hope that helps

As I said I had a partition built with a door to make a closed in hallway so I can enter & exit safely without having to worry about door dashing---- whatever it takes for ' prevention 'rather than a day late and a dollar short

 

[IndyJones]

You could try gently pushing him back with your foot if he tries to bolt out the door. I'm not sure how he reacts to treats but eventualy you could train him to sit/stay.

It might be a good idea to try putting a collar on him if he tries to bolt. Both my cats wear collars (no bells) and tags.

 

[dizkneephreek]

The past two nights have actually gone really well. I was able to sleep all night in bed. He'll join me and snuggle up for a little while, but he mostly stays in the living room laying on the floor or his bed. He's been playing with his toys more on his own, which is great because at first he didn't seem interested in playing at all. He hasn't gone up to the doors or windows acting like he wants out. I still haven't opened the blinds or tried to open the front of back doors yet...I want to give it some more time to make sure he realizes inside is his home now. He has started having some issues with diarrhea after I gave him some digestive aids (Sunday night I was getting worried because he hadn't had a bowel movement since his surgery). But I called the vet and she said just to give him a little more time to see if things firm up, and that it's possible it's stress related. But otherwise he seems to be adjusting well and I'm so proud of the progress he's made in such a short time.

Also, is it me or is he smiling here?

 

[Kwik]

The past two nights have actually gone really well. I was able to sleep all night in bed. He'll join me and snuggle up for a little while, but he mostly stays in the living room laying on the floor or his bed. He's been playing with his toys more on his own, which is great because at first he didn't seem interested in playing at all. He hasn't gone up to the doors or windows acting like he wants out. I still haven't opened the blinds or tried to open the front of back doors yet...I want to give it some more time to make sure he realizes inside is his home now. He has started having some issues with diarrhea after I gave him some digestive aids (Sunday night I was getting worried because he hadn't had a bowel movement since his surgery). But I called the vet and she said just to give him a little more time to see if things firm up, and that it's possible it's stress related. But otherwise he seems to be adjusting well and I'm so proud of the progress he's made in such a short time.

Also, is it me or is he smiling here?
View attachment 460036

Definitely smiling-rofl!

 

[tabbytom]

The past two nights have actually gone really well. I was able to sleep all night in bed. He'll join me and snuggle up for a little while, but he mostly stays in the living room laying on the floor or his bed. He's been playing with his toys more on his own, which is great because at first he didn't seem interested in playing at all. He hasn't gone up to the doors or windows acting like he wants out. I still haven't opened the blinds or tried to open the front of back doors yet...I want to give it some more time to make sure he realizes inside is his home now. He has started having some issues with diarrhea after I gave him some digestive aids (Sunday night I was getting worried because he hadn't had a bowel movement since his surgery). But I called the vet and she said just to give him a little more time to see if things firm up, and that it's possible it's stress related. But otherwise he seems to be adjusting well and I'm so proud of the progress he's made in such a short time.

Also, is it me or is he smiling here?

What a great smile and great progress Yes, keep doing the same things and get him used to it. You can break his will rot getting out again.

As for his diarrhea, hope it is just a passing one. If it's a bad one, here's an article for you to read :- My Cat Has Diarrhea - What Do I Do?. You can also give him probiotics just to maintain his gut system daily at a lower dose.

Do keep us updated

 

[dizkneephreek]

What a great smile and great progress Yes, keep doing the same things and get him used to it. You can break his will rot getting out again.

As for his diarrhea, hope it is just a passing one. If it's a bad one, here's an article for you to read :- My Cat Has Diarrhea - What Do I Do?. You can also give him probiotics just to maintain his gut system daily at a lower dose.

Do keep us updated

Thank you for that article! He's still having issues with soft stool. I started him on probiotics (Fortiflora) and a sensitive stomach dry food made with prebiotics. Hoping that will start helping him soon. If I don't see improvement in the next few days, we'll be making another visit to the vet to see what's going on. Since he was treated for worms a month ago, and has had two doses of Revolution, I can't imagine it's parasites. I'm still hoping it's just stress and the probiotics can straighten him out.

 

[tabbytom]

Thank you for that article! He's still having issues with soft stool. I started him on probiotics (Fortiflora) and a sensitive stomach dry food made with prebiotics. Hoping that will start helping him soon. If I don't see improvement in the next few days, we'll be making another visit to the vet to see what's going on. Since he was treated for worms a month ago, and has had two doses of Revolution, I can't imagine it's parasites. I'm still hoping it's just stress and the probiotics can straighten him out.

My boy has chronic diarrhea for about 2 months early this year and I got him on the probiotics from the article and his diarrhea was resolved and now he poop are nicely formed and also I continue to give him the probiotics once in the morning and once in the evening at a smaller dose for gut maintenance and I'm also taking the same probiotics as he is.

If you are getting this probiotics for him, stop the Fortiflora and the dry food.

 

[tabbytom]

D dizkneephreek

Updates please!

 

[dizkneephreek]

D dizkneephreek

Updates please!

Elwood is doing well! The bathroom issues have seemingly resolved. They did reappear briefly after we used the vacuum cleaner for the first time. He has started getting a bit more mischievous though, playing with things he's not supposed to...like electrical cords and toes I'm trying to figure out how to best direct him away from those behaviors. He's also way more playful in general than I expected. Outside he seemed to sleep and laze about all day. I rarely saw him play, except for when a lizard would catch his attention. But now he plays all the time. I was worried he might be under stimulated indoors, so I tried buying him all kinds of toys and playing with him with a laser pointer. Maybe I did my job too well Then again, my Dahlia was 16 when she passed. She was still playful, but obviously much different than a younger cat is. So I'm really not used to having a young cat anymore. Not sure if he'll calm down a bit after a few months or if this is just his personality. But if I could just teach him to focus on his toys and not things he could hurt, or that could hurt him, I'd be happy.

 

[Kwik]

Lol- you saw him during the day- he was busy all night,lol. Now that he's adjusted to your hours he's active during the day.

The photo is darling,such a cuddle bum! Happy to hear he is doing so well.... how about some puzzles with treats or other interactive type toys? Orrrrrrrrrr- a little playmate? Lol

 

[dizkneephreek]

Lol- you saw him during the day- he was busy all night,lol. Now that he's adjusted to your hours he's active during the day.

The photo is darling,such a cuddle bum! Happy to hear he is doing so well.... how about some puzzles with treats or other interactive type toys? Orrrrrrrrrr- a little playmate? Lol

Sure, I definitely understand that I wasn't around him as much when he was outside. But when I would watch him on my outdoor cameras, he was always so good about not messing with stuff. I didn't even see him go after birds. He would just stare at them and chirp. So this version of him messing with stuff he's not supposed to has caught me off guard a little.

He does have some interactive toys, and he loves things he can bat across the floor. I had avoided treats for a while until his digestive issues were good and resolved. As for a playmate...I would only get one if I was looking for a divorce My husband has made it clear he does not want another cat...he wasn't really onboard with Elwood to begin with. Plus Elwood is FIV+ so getting him a playmate may not be possible.

 

[Kwik]

Sure, I definitely understand that I wasn't around him as much when he was outside. But when I would watch him on my outdoor cameras, he was always so good about not messing with stuff. I didn't even see him go after birds. He would just stare at them and chirp. So this version of him messing with stuff he's not supposed to has caught me off guard a little.

He does have some interactive toys, and he loves things he can bat across the floor. I had avoided treats for a while until his digestive issues were good and resolved. As for a playmate...I would only get one if I was looking for a divorce My husband has made it clear he does not want another cat...he wasn't really onboard with Elwood to begin with. Plus Elwood is FIV+ so getting him a playmate may not be possible.

Lol- the divorce has me chuckling but I get it! I didn't know he was FIV pos.....he's a playful guy to say the least so I suppose your going to have to let the environment teach him that some stuff ,though attractive,is unpleasant!

Imo,environmental training is the very best,you are not the bad guy,lol
Sticky tape for where you don't want him,sprays like Scratch No ,stop scratch and other deterrents and there are many other trips and tips that will help you and Elllwood to share the same living space without any issues

I had a kitten once who was fixated on my toes- the more I'd try to distract him the more he wanted those tootsies---- one day I thought why not spray the Scratch No on my toes- 2 or 3 times of him getting a wiff of that and tasting the bitter spray he decided toes were not very appealing. They do have 'cst proof" sleeves for electrical cords - I've personally never used them because my cords are very neatly tacked to the base boards,under carpets or hidden well but I hear they do the job

Hope that helps

 

[IndyJones]

Lol- the divorce has me chuckling but I get it! I didn't know he was FIV pos.....he's a playful guy to say the least so I suppose your going to have to let the environment teach him that some stuff ,though attractive,is unpleasant!

Imo,environmental training is the very best,you are not the bad guy,lol
Sticky tape for where you don't want him,sprays like Scratch No ,stop scratch and other deterrents and there are many other trips and tips that will help you and Elllwood to share the same living space without any issues

I had a kitten once who was fixated on my toes- the more I'd try to distract him the more he wanted those tootsies---- one day I thought why not spray the Scratch No on my toes- 2 or 3 times of him getting a wiff of that and tasting the bitter spray he decided toes were not very appealing. They do have 'cst proof" sleeves for electrical cords - I've personally never used them because my cords are very neatly tacked to the base boards,under carpets or hidden well but I hear they do the job

Hope that helps

RE: baseboards, don't pout cords near baseboard heaters. You could end up with a fire. They can get quite hot. I aslo have tripped on cords under carpets don't put it where people frequently walk. Indy has never bothered with cords outside of my headset and phone cords. I have a braided phone cord now. Braided cords can withstand a bit more abuse than rubber ones.

 

[tabbytom]

Elwood is doing well! The bathroom issues have seemingly resolved. They did reappear briefly after we used the vacuum cleaner for the first time. He has started getting a bit more mischievous though, playing with things he's not supposed to...like electrical cords and toes I'm trying to figure out how to best direct him away from those behaviors. He's also way more playful in general than I expected. Outside he seemed to sleep and laze about all day. I rarely saw him play, except for when a lizard would catch his attention. But now he plays all the time. I was worried he might be under stimulated indoors, so I tried buying him all kinds of toys and playing with him with a laser pointer. Maybe I did my job too well Then again, my Dahlia was 16 when she passed. She was still playful, but obviously much different than a younger cat is. So I'm really not used to having a young cat anymore. Not sure if he'll calm down a bit after a few months or if this is just his personality. But if I could just teach him to focus on his toys and not things he could hurt, or that could hurt him, I'd be happy.

It’s so nice to see him doing well and relaxed. He’s also getting used to lots of things and have become more confidence. Yes, a younger cat has more energy and therefore they keep you n your toes much longer. Just be stern with him when he plays with the electrical cords and toes. Tell him no firmly and remove him from the the cords and at the same time have a toy at hand to distract him. After a few times, he’ll probably get the idea and sometimes such things are just a passing and soon they focus on something else. As for the toys, you have to find out what kind of toys he likes and how he would like to play and interact.
He’ll calm down once he’s much settled in but cats being cats, they do what cats like to do.