Whoops. Bad behaviour three months in

Willowwombat

TCS Member
Thread starter
Adult Cat
Joined
Nov 5, 2021
Messages
157
Purraise
149
We adopted 9-year-old Dude three months ago to join our 8 year old female. We had a great intro phase and three months of peace between the two cats, even signs of friendliness. Dude was even showing hesitant signs of wanting to play with Willow, and he was definitely trusting her.

But all of a sudden Willow, our original cat, has started to jump on Dude, causing him to hiss and even growl at her.

Last time we saw this behaviour, I clapped my hands and said "Willow, no" several times. I think she got the message, but now I'm concerned that maybe things are deteriorating. Or does she think this is play? He obviously doesn't, and he was only just sarting to feel fully comfortable around here.

I have Feliway Friends al over the house already. Is there anything else I can do? I was so happy that the cats were getting along, but now I'm worried again.
 

ArtNJ

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jun 1, 2017
Messages
5,485
Purraise
6,957
8 year olds are definitely still capable of wanting to initiate play. If there was no hissing by Willow, that seems likely what it was. So if Dude is just hissing and trying to back off, then there is reason to hope this won't escalate and Willow can get the message. Usually cats her age, even if they want to play, aren't as pushy about it as younger ones. And certainly its not as constant.
 

danteshuman

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 27, 2017
Messages
5,030
Purraise
6,077
Location
California
It sounds like unwanted play & maybe some mild bullying. Out of the three “kittens” the girl sometimes gets picked on when her brother is bored. (They are 3 years old.)

What helps is giving her a break from the boys sometimes, playing 1 on 1 with each cat every day & finding ways to entertain the cats. Interactive toys you rotate helps. Maybe try hanging a bird feeder or two outside a window. The daily play will help the most. Play builds up confidence and tires them out. I get the wand or fishing pole toys to climb up, down & around furniture. It tires them out to make them climb and challenges them to think of ways to get the toy. You are looking for the sweet medium of not to hard & not to easy. ⭐ You may need to play with them with one cat locked out of the room if you have a toy hog who can’t wait their turn.
 

Maria Bayote

Mama of 4 Cats, 4 Dogs , 2 Budgies & 2 Humans
Top Cat
Joined
Jan 15, 2018
Messages
4,171
Purraise
12,686
I think it's quite normal. I have 3 cats currently with me n the apartment and they have been living together for years. Every now and then, there is hissing and there is growling and even swatting, usually by the older cat to the younger cat. However, there are instances that the younger cat seems to get annoyed by the older cat's version of "play" and they end up growling at each other, sometimes the younger one chasing the older cat. I ignore them at most times even when they ricochet on my face. But when it starts to seemingly get serious, I yell at them and they stop.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #5

Willowwombat

TCS Member
Thread starter
Adult Cat
Joined
Nov 5, 2021
Messages
157
Purraise
149
I can't rally play with them very much at th moment. My husband is in a health crisis and my attention is on him. Trying to decidde whether to put him in hospice care.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #6

Willowwombat

TCS Member
Thread starter
Adult Cat
Joined
Nov 5, 2021
Messages
157
Purraise
149
So, where we are at now is a very good place.

Dude has started to turn tables on Willow a bit, which seems to be exactly the reaction she wanted.

Every now and again he chases her right back and even takes the odd swat at her, which she, apparently, loves. The last time he swatted her she rolled over on her side and proceeded to lick her tail, which means she wants to play.

Yesterday he was staring off into space, the way cats do, and she sneaked up on him and nudged him in the side with her nose. I thought he might back off or get upset, but he just looked at her, and she plopped over and rolled on her back, at which point he plopped down and rolled over onto his side right beside her.

Now they are actuelly hanging out together. Dude chooses to sit near her all the time instead of on the opposite side of the room, so the four of us all hang out together in the living room.

I think they may end up being BFFs.
 

ArtNJ

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jun 1, 2017
Messages
5,485
Purraise
6,957
A 65 year old woman and a 70 year old man slowly became friends. The woman wanted more, and started going for some cuddles. The man was initially freaked out...it had been so long...so he pushed her away. She persevered, and, slowly, love blossomed.

Special. Two cats this age have a hard time getting here, and its a wonderful thing that they managed it.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #9

Willowwombat

TCS Member
Thread starter
Adult Cat
Joined
Nov 5, 2021
Messages
157
Purraise
149
Yes, that is about right. LOL. I think we adopted him in mid-October, so they were definitely a good match.

Last night they were playing pawsies under the full-length curtains. Very cute. Like two kittens.

Dude is also getting to be way more cuddly with us, and more outgoing in general.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #11

Willowwombat

TCS Member
Thread starter
Adult Cat
Joined
Nov 5, 2021
Messages
157
Purraise
149
I have yet to get a good shot of them together. Typical cats -- they do something cute, but the second you stand up to take the shot, they are outta here.
 
Top