What's on your Mind Thread - 2023

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muffy

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Do you guys think it is gross to wear a pair of socks all day and then wear them to bed when I change into my pajamas? Or should I put a fresh pair on for bed? What do you do?
I sleep with the same socks that I walk around in all day. I guess that is gross but it is a thing I do. I don't sleep between the sheets. I sleep on top of the bed spread with a throw. I think you do to.
 

iPappy

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I sleep with the same socks that I walk around in all day. I guess that is gross but it is a thing I do. I don't sleep between the sheets. I sleep on top of the bed spread with a throw. I think you do to.
That's exactly what I do, too. If it's hot, I go without socks but when it's cooler I wear the same ones I wore that day.
muffy muffy I sleep on top of the bedspread, too, it makes making the bed so much easier!
 

FeralHearts

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Okay, I need to vent a bit so I don't end up doing or saying something unprofessional and hurtful to people who I probably should not. Once I start, I might lose control, and I might say some cruel things - some of which could be true, while others, though partially true, would be unfair.

Today, I had to call the vet clinic and ask a question about the possibility of getting an advanced GI panel done for one of my kids. I was triggered - and I don't like using that word, but it's the most fitting. Twice during the conversation, I almost lost my composure. To me, this should be a straightforward question: what's the cost, and do you offer this service? (because I know that not all places do). It should be simple.

There's a valid reason behind my question. In 2021, she had an ultrasound that showed possible emerging small cell lymphoma (SCL) and likely pancreatitis. Even though the snap test came back negative for pancreatitis, I trust the ultrasound results and my vet's judgment on this.

Without going into too much detail, she has gained some weight lately, her eating habits aren't the best, and she's transitioned from a thin cat to a plumper one, with a noticeable increase in girth, like you'd see in a pregnant cat. Not obese, still within a healthy range. It's not an emergency, nothing that would require immediate action or an ER visit - more of a watchful waiting situation. My inquiry is justified. She had a checkup a few months ago, and her blood and urine tests were fine. I get that. I should also mention that her sister, who was apparently a "perfectly healthy cat other than cancer," is now gone... and for years of my saying, "She is fat but not eating enough to maintain that weight" and being brushed off about it... you can imagine hearing "blood tests are fine, nothing is wrong" means absolutely nothing to me anymore. I don't care what basic tests say. If there is something not fitting right - look deeper. Changing a cat's food , lessening calories over and over and over again with no results should be a red flag when there are no results.

Anyway...

The technician I spoke to on the phone was talking about sending her two hours away for MRI or CT scans, which is where her sister was sent to see an oncologist who ultimately did nothing for her but involved a lot of hesitation (hmming and haaing -literally for 5 -10 minutes - and no actual tests. ) The doc rattled off statistics and treatment options. Kitty wasn't eating at the time either. The first priority should have been getting her to eat again and running tests. Then they could have discussed treatment options and whether she was even a viable candidate for treatment or if it would be more caring to do palliative care. But no, they did nothing, and she passed away just eight days later. My immediate reaction to the suggestion was, "She'll go there when hell freezes over." - I even said it out loud. I'm usually not like that, but it just struck a nerve - hard.

Secondly, how can a two-hour drive for a CT scan or MRI be considered less invasive than a simple blood test? I had to hold my breath. So now we're considering ultrasounds and scans, which I understand are often used in conjunction with the advanced GI panel, but someone explain to me how that's less invasive than just a blood test. Rhetorical as I know it's not.

The technician mentioned something about jumping to conclusions that it's the same thing as her sister had. I bit my tongue again and explained that I completely understood their concern because I would think the same thing. However, there's an ultrasound from before her sister's diagnosis that supports the current suspicion, along with observable symptoms. I took another breath, and I can't recall exactly what I said, but it revolved around the well-being of the cats, and she responded with an "aww" sound, as if cooing over a cute kitten.

There was my second trigger.

This same "aww" response was given when her sister was ill, when I had called to inform them that her bladder and tummy were very sore, and she was in pain. Yet, they did nothing but offer that sympathetic "aww" sound, and that was my second trigger. Who thinks that a sick or pained cat warrants such a response? Certainly not me, and it infuriated me. It's a minor thing, and it shouldn't have affected me so much, but it did. All it did was bring back a memory of when her sister was in pain, and someone on the other end responded the same way - that same "aweee" - with no action to help. it took a lot for me not to rip into them asking if they thought a sick or in pain cat was somehow cute? BTW it was the kind of wwee sound you would use when playing/looking at a cute kitten - that tone.

One day, I'll vent about what happened to her sister and why I hold her vets, that oncologist, and even myself responsible for her early passing - and responsible for the way it happened. But I can't do it just yet. It still feels too raw.

I hope this all makes sense, and thank you for letting me get this off my chest.

Anyone who read the whole thing I have to ask:

Am I being oversensitive and need to give my head a shake because I'm still grieving - or is something wrong with this picture?
 
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maggiedemi

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Thanks guys. I guess I won't worry about wearing them to bed then. I don't have enough socks right now! I need to get more. I got a new fleece blanket, but it wasn't warm enough, so I got a 2nd one, and it's still not warm enough! Might have to get a stupid bulky comforter again. I threw my old one out.
 

iPappy

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Thanks guys. I guess I won't worry about wearing them to bed then. I don't have enough socks right now! I need to get more. I got a new fleece blanket, but it wasn't warm enough, so I got a 2nd one, and it's still not warm enough! Might have to get a stupid bulky comforter again. I threw my old one out.
Did you ever find something suitable in a synthetic down? I really like how warm yet lightweight they are.
 

maggiedemi

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I looked at some comforters at the stores, but they were all this crinkly wrinkled material that looked ugly to me. I want something smooth, all gray with no white on it, not too bulky.
 

maggiedemi

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That one looks nice. Thank you! I was also considering a merino wool blanket, since my aunt bought me a pair of socks that were so warm. But not sure how I feel about using wool, since I'm vegetarian. I know the sheep doesn't have to die though, but some people think it's cruel.
 

Kat0121

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That one looks nice. Thank you! I was also considering a merino wool blanket, since my aunt bought me a pair of socks that were so warm. But not sure how I feel about using wool, since I'm vegetarian. I know the sheep doesn't have to die though, but some people think it's cruel.
Sheep have to be sheared. It's not good for them to let their wool keep growing and growing. It's no worse than a haircut. Their wool gets very heavy and if it gets bad enough it limits their ability to move.

Why Do Sheep Need To Be Sheared? | Northwest Veterinary Clinic of Stanwood
 

kashmir64

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Anyone who read the whole thing I have to ask:

Am I being oversensitive and need to give my head a shake because I'm still grieving - or is something wrong with this picture?
I truly believe, and have run into this, that they think that because they have 'formal' training and have a license that they know everything there is to know about any and all animals. That 'we' are uneducated and jumping to conclusions. Which, in some cases, we are. But not this one.
I would seriously talk to another vet, and then another until you get the answers and response that you deserve and require. Anyone in position saying 'aaww' to a sick or in pain animal (ie. vet, tech etc.) should be fired and/or lose their license.
 

FeralHearts

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kashmir64 kashmir64 Thank you. XO

*nods* this is exactly the plan. I will wait for her vet to call me back and discuss and if I don't think it's an acceptable answer, or reasonable approach then she is going for a second opinion. History will not repeat itself. It's some of the reason I blame myself for Mia. I should have followed my gut. (and btw the people on this site were more helpful than her vets. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't have even gotten as much help for her as I was able to as I didn't know what to ask for. I hate to think about how much worse it would have been without this site.)

I've looked up a vet close by me that appears to have a really good reputation. (Mine is considered the best in the city and they are certainly smart - but it seems that they have issues thinking outside the box and after what happened - this is a definite issue in my mind.) There is another that I know is a good vet (from experience) in the next city over who is also an option.

Thank you for making me feel less crazy. I know during grief we can be really sensitive to things so we have to be careful not to overreact etc. but this felt all wrong all over the place and I was doubting if it was me being way to sensitive (which I'm sure it is a little) or if something else... or even a bit of both.

For those who don't know - sudden weight gain in a cat is a sign of Cancer in the GI and the blood work can be perfectly fine. It's not common but it happens more than is listed.
 

iPappy

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How come I’m always feeling the most “snacky” when there are no real snacky foods around? Nothing munchie anyway. I tried a spoonful of almond butter and a few baby pickles. Maybe i should just go take a Sunday nap! :lol:
For me it's a mental thing. If I have snacks galore, I'm like "Nah, don't want them" but tell me I can't have them/don't have them, it's all I want!
 

MoochNNoodles

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For me it's a mental thing. If I have snacks galore, I'm like "Nah, don't want them" but tell me I can't have them/don't have them, it's all I want!
I’m that way with sweet things! It’s much easier to control my eating treats when they don’t feel restricted. DH is the opposite! But the more I think about it because we don’t have it; the more I want it!

I better wait till after dinner to make our grocery order. :lol:
 

iPappy

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I’m that way with sweet things! It’s much easier to control my eating treats when they don’t feel restricted. DH is the opposite! But the more I think about it because we don’t have it; the more I want it!

I better wait till after dinner to make our grocery order. :lol:
I have gone to the grocery ravenous before. BIG MISTAKE!! I came home with so much stuff and spent WAY too much money!
 

iPappy

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Friday was one year since Tag passed. That morning, I was having my coffee and looked over and saw Lila settle into his favorite chair. She doesn't usually lay there. It was almost like she was observing a moment of silence. With the little sunbeam on her, I found it very touching, and so sweet. Lila was definitely Tags kitten.
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