What's going on with me

[maggiedemi]

I don't know where we both will end up. Maybe we will end up in the same assisted living facility. Maggie finally came out and I grabbed her and put her in dad's bedroom. I heard him say "Beautiful, I missed you so much!" It's quiet in there, so hopefully she remembers him. He said that it's a load off his mind seeing that me and the cats are safe and that he can finally try to get well. I knew it! He does love us and I'm still the favorite. My brother said his heart is getting stronger, I think he said almost 30 percent. I didn't even know that was possible. He has to fill out a chart every morning, weigh himself, take blood pressure, 6 pills in morning, 1 at night, drink no more than 64oz water, a certain amount of sodium. It's a lot. Thankfully he is able to pretty much do it himself. I just have to watch over him. He walks with a walker most of the time.

 

[rubysmama]

M maggiedemi : how are things going today? Did everyone sleep well last night?

 

[Jcatbird]

I guess you are very busy but we are hoping for a good and calm day for you, Dad and kitties.

 

[strider rose]

M maggiedemi just wanted to let you know that you have a friend in me and im here for you if you need someone to listen to you , ok ?

 

[maggiedemi]

Today went well. Dad made himself an egg sammich for lunch and heated up soup for dinner. My cousin came over for an hour and a half. She is a home healthcare aid. She checked him out for me. She said he looks good! He really enjoyed the visit, but it really wore him out. He and Maggie are sleeping. She remembers him finally. He said she jumped up on his bed like 20 times last night and stared him in the face and licked him.

 

[iPappy]

Today went well. Dad made himself an egg sammich for lunch and heated up soup for dinner. My cousin came over for an hour and a half. She is a home healthcare aid. She checked him out for me. She said he looks good! He really enjoyed the visit, but it really wore him out. He and Maggie are sleeping. She remembers him finally. He said she jumped up on his bed like 20 times last night and stared him in the face and licked him.

I am so happy things are looking up for you and your Dad, and am very happy that Maggie remembers him.

 

[maggiedemi]

Dad can't really cook much yet. He just makes eggs on the stove and heats up some of mom's soup that was in the freezer. He won't let me cook for him. He wants to do everything himself. What can I get for him to heat up that is healthy and low sodium? Frozen meals and canned soup? I unthawed some black angus stew beef and boneless skinless chicken thighs. But he doesn't feel like cooking them. He says they are probably freezer burnt. They do say 2020 on them, from Mom's hoarding stash. Do you think my cousin could cook up a nice soup or stew for him? He hates my cooking, plus I'm vegetarian. I don't really want to cook meat ever again, but he's the one person I would do it for, but he won't let me. He would probably let my cousin though. She's a great cook. She is a home healthcare aid, but I think she still works part time at Walmart in the bakery. Her cakes are famous at family gatherings.

 

[neely]

What can I get for him to heat up that is healthy and low sodium? Frozen meals and canned soup?

Does he like pasta? There are many different types of pasta dishes that can be made into a casserole and you would have multiple servings to heat up. There's even an easy recipe for spaghetti pie that we made with our students at school in home ec. class. Regarding frozen meals or canned soup they are usually high in sodium so look for a low sodium version. Sorry your dad doesn't like your cooking but more importantly he loves you. If your cousin is willing to do some cooking that's a good idea.

 

[iPappy]

Dad can't really cook much yet. He just makes eggs on the stove and heats up some of mom's soup that was in the freezer. He won't let me cook for him. He wants to do everything himself. What can I get for him to heat up that is healthy and low sodium? Frozen meals and canned soup? I unthawed some black angus stew beef and boneless skinless chicken thighs. But he doesn't feel like cooking them. He says they are probably freezer burnt. They do say 2020 on them, from Mom's hoarding stash. Do you think my cousin could cook up a nice soup or stew for him? He hates my cooking, plus I'm vegetarian. I don't really want to cook meat ever again, but he's the one person I would do it for, but he won't let me. He would probably let my cousin though. She's a great cook. She is a home healthcare aid, but I think she still works part time at Walmart in the bakery. Her cakes are famous at family gatherings.

Amy's brand soups and casseroles have low sodium recipes, but can be pricey. I have never had the casseroles but the soup is very good!
Amy's Kitchen - Soups

 

[rubysmama]

As a fellow vegetarian, I understand you never wanting to cook meat again. But also understand cooking it for your Dad.

I'd suggest getting all fresh meats, as your Dad is probably right that whatever is in the freezer is freezer burned

Did he see a dietian before he left the hospital/rehab to get guidance on what foods he should be eating.

For meats, I'd think lean ones, such as chicken breast and fish, both of which should be able to be baked in the oven, without too much work by you. And if you don't want to touch the raw meat/fish, there's disposable gloves such as these:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B087PKS1P7/?tag=thecatsite

For menu ideas, maybe there's some here: Daily menus for heart-healthy eating

 

[maggiedemi]

Does he like pasta?

Yes, we both love pasta bakes. I should make some and maybe he can have some meat on the side.

Amy's brand soups and casseroles have low sodium recipes

We do have some of those that my mom left behind, but he likes meat. I'll ask him if he wants them!

Did he see a dietian before he left the hospital/rehab to get guidance on what foods he should be eating.

Yes. He can only have 2000mg sodium per day I think.

My cousin said she will cook for him! She only lives a few minutes away. We are going to clear out all the meat from the freezer this month and see if we can use any of it. We might be moving anyway, so best to get rid of it. I'm so glad I don't have to cook dead animal.

 

[maggiedemi]

Did I tell you guys that mom called me the other day and said "We are not supposed to talk to each other. So don't tell anybody that I call you. If we don't tell anybody we should be okay, if we're careful." She's nuts! No way am I being sneaky like that, it will only get me in trouble. I'm gonna tell my brother that she calls me almost every day, or every other day.

One day I called her back and I was asking her laundry questions, and I heard the lady she lives with lecturing me in the background. She said "If you had helped your mother around the house then you would know!" I was so mad! I had no idea she had me on speakerphone every time I call. You are not supposed to put people on speakerphone without their permission. So they must be monitoring my calls. They better not be recording me. Anyway, I said "Mom you know that you never let me use the washer and dryer!"

 

[maggiedemi]

I was on the phone talking to my brother. Then I couldn't find my dad. He was out in the breezeway sorting the trash! He said we sorted it wrong! He's not supposed to be doing that, he's supposed to wait for my brother to do all that on Friday. He said I heard you guys on the phone. You're trying to put me in a home! I said no dad, it would be assisted living, not a nursing home. He wants to stay here so bad, but I just don't know if he can. It's so far out in the wilderness and we would have to hire somebody to plow the snow and take the trash every week. I'm willing to try it if my brothers will let us. I wouldn't mind moving to town together though. As long as we are together and have the cats.

 

[maggiedemi]

I guess my cousin doesn't have to cook that meat I unthawed for dad. I just went out in the kitchen & he has the instapot & breadmaker going! Holy crap. He's out there cooking that meat & making bread! He was also sorting the trash. He said we did it wrong. Ha! My brothers said it's okay as long as I make sure he doesn't fall down those 2 steps in the breezeway.

 

[neely]

I just went out in the kitchen & he has the instapot & breadmaker going! Holy crap. He's out there cooking that meat & making bread! He was also sorting the trash. He said we did it wrong.

I'm sure it helps to make him feel he can do these things for himself and will ultimately aid in his recovery too. Good for him for not sitting around and complaining. He sounds like a remarkable guy.

 

[Willowy]

Wow I just found this thread and caught up! That's a lot going on!

You've gotten a lot of good advice so I don't have much to add, but I don't think it's realistic for the 2 of you to continue to live out in the country. Your dad would probably hurt himself trying to mow or something like that, and it would take too long for the ambulance to get there if he needs it. Talk to your social worker about the possibility of getting a nice little 2-bedroom apartment in town. That way you're close to medical care, no lawn/snow care, garbage and other services are taken care of, etc., but you can still stay together, with the cats of course. She can make recommendations about handling it financially and all that.

 

[Maria Bayote]

I also just read about this thread and had a lot of catching up to do. Oh sweetie M maggiedemi , I wish I could do anything for you. Hang in there. You and your cats deserve only the best, and I pray it turns out that way in the end.

 

[maggiedemi]

Your dad would probably hurt himself trying to mow or something like that,

OMG. You certainly called that one right. I just looked out the window and dad is out there on the tractor plowing the driveway/yard! What do I do?! He knows that my brother is coming tonight to do all that! He must be trying to prove he can stay here and take care of himself.

 

[neely]

I just looked out the window and dad is out there on the tractor plowing the driveway/yard! What do I do?! He knows that my brother is coming tonight to do all that! He must be trying to prove he can stay here and take care of himself.

Can you go out there and ask him to stop without hurting his feelings? Maybe tell him he'll end up back in the hospital if he does too much too soon. Or let him know your brother is making a special trip to do it tonight. Good luck!

 

[Jem]

Have you had a nice talk with him about finding a small, low maintenance living situation for the both of you? He may be trying really hard to prove he can stay because he is also scared about losing you and your cats, or scared of what will happen to you if he is no longer able to keep up with where you currently live. If he is assured that you will go with him wherever he goes, he may be more inclined to take it easy and simply work on getting better.
Has he been presented with retirement home options where the both of you can go? Have you been looking into a new living arrangement for yourself...and hopefully for your Dad as well?
You need to start being proactive...it's the only way you can have some sort of control of your life and not end up having to settle when the time comes where your Dad needs to move where he can get all the help he needs.
Not to scare you, but once the renovations happen (if they ever get to it)...from what I've read in the posts so far....I have a sneaking suspicion that your brothers or Mom (or both) are planning to put the house up for sale and place your Dad in a home...regardless of what your Dad wants. What will happen to you in this scenario will depend on how prepared you are.