Venting....

tarasgirl06

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My sister is definitely not well. Today she was sending me a message that because of some dream she believes i wont be saved, and that im going to fail some test. I do believe in God and consider myself a christian. But my sister uses her religion to manipulate people. She told me God had let her know no one in the family would get COVID, and then she supposedly got it. lol Oddly enough she took three tests, only one came back positive, the rest negative. So who knows if she actually had it.

The middle brother has helped me out a few times. He is the only child that actually offered my mom a car, but she felt bad taking it. I can try asking him again and explaining the situation. Just worried he will tell me to move in with him and his wife. That would not be a good thing. She is the worst of all my SILs. I would rather live under a bridge with my cats at that point.

I dont know if a change of diet would help since what my sister has is asthma. Just being near litter supposedly sets her off. The problem is that they will continue finding ways to blame things on the cats. Today she was lecturing the niece i live with that her son can end up with breathing problems too because of the cat hair. She was going to call her other daughter to lecture her too since she has pets.

People in this family have such an obsession with blaming everything on the cats. The baby is coughing? Its the cats! The baby has the flu? Its the cats!

I have to reach out to my brother, just feel bad because i know he is broke. I hope this somehow leads me to a better place where i dont have to feel stressed anymore, and the cats are safe.



Sadly, i agree with you. I will continue to be there for my family because i feel my mom is watching over me. She always expected better from me. But i have seen what family can do to you.

My own father didnt care if we had food growing up, and now acts like he was a great father to me growing up. I have learned to let things go, but i do not forget when someone hurts me.
The thing to bear in mind is that parents are people. They weren't always parents. They were human beings, like we all are, and they grew up informed by everyone and everything around them. There's no manual for parents. (Well, actually there are a lot of them. But bottom line, we all carry the baggage of our ancestors, and if we have bad baggage...you know how this goes.)
It took my parents' passing for me to really get all of this. I was fortunate to have what I consider to be the BEST parents; but they were human, too, and before they became parents, they did all kinds of things and lived all kinds of lives. If kids grow up in dysfunctional households, the odds are they will be, too. My folks were both exceptions, for which I am so grateful. But they had their faults.
My parents helped various people in their families. But at some point, people have to help themselves. I've had all kinds of problems and at some point I threw a lot of them off, because I had to or I wanted to. We all have free will.
We say that there are as many paths to the Creator as there are seekers. Just something to bear in mind.
As for cats, they are the cleanest beings on earth except for marine animals. They're far cleaner than humans. They certainly do not cause flu or asthma!
 

terestrife

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The thing to bear in mind is that parents are people. They weren't always parents. They were human beings, like we all are, and they grew up informed by everyone and everything around them. There's no manual for parents. (Well, actually there are a lot of them. But bottom line, we all carry the baggage of our ancestors, and if we have bad baggage...you know how this goes.)
It took my parents' passing for me to really get all of this. I was fortunate to have what I consider to be the BEST parents; but they were human, too, and before they became parents, they did all kinds of things and lived all kinds of lives. If kids grow up in dysfunctional households, the odds are they will be, too. My folks were both exceptions, for which I am so grateful. But they had their faults.
My parents helped various people in their families. But at some point, people have to help themselves. I've had all kinds of problems and at some point I threw a lot of them off, because I had to or I wanted to. We all have free will.
We say that there are as many paths to the Creator as there are seekers. Just something to bear in mind.
As for cats, they are the cleanest beings on earth except for marine animals. They're far cleaner than humans. They certainly do not cause flu or asthma!
I understand what you mean. Everyone has faults, and i dont consider myself free of faults. I have my bad moments too. lol I've just realized that for my own sanity i need my own place. To have peace and quiet.

Not sure what will happen with my sister moving. Shes now saying shes upset because she cant even visit during summer, that i dont understand what she is going through. That i dont understand that she gets to the point she cant breathe. I do understand that, and do feel bad. But i also cant just rehome my cats, or throw them into the streets. Kitty has been an indoor cat since she was born. I care enough that i would gladly leave if i could afford it.

I dont understand what she wants from me. I told her i would keep the cats locked up when shes here. But she claims the ER doctor stated the cat allergens will travel through the AC and get to her. First she wanted me to pay for some catio outside. Now shes saying that she'll pay for it. Shes obsessively nagging at her daughter about the risks of cats. My niece said shes become obsessive about it. I get the feeling her husband is pinching her about it.

Theres something really wrong with these people. I am going to just start looking for work. I just dont know what to do because work isnt easy to find where i live. It took me a year to switch last time, and i only went up in pay by $2 which isnt enough to live alone here.

Ive been worrying about my health too. My doctor wants to keep up the hormone medication for the abnormal cells in my uterus. i have been on treatment since 08/2019. I dont know if this should still be going on. I want a second opinion but its hard to find a doctor to trust. They want to increase my medication and insert an IUD on top of that. It feels like they just want to make as much money as possible.
 

tarasgirl06

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I understand what you mean. Everyone has faults, and i dont consider myself free of faults. I have my bad moments too. lol I've just realized that for my own sanity i need my own place. To have peace and quiet.

Not sure what will happen with my sister moving. Shes now saying shes upset because she cant even visit during summer, that i dont understand what she is going through. That i dont understand that she gets to the point she cant breathe. I do understand that, and do feel bad. But i also cant just rehome my cats, or throw them into the streets. Kitty has been an indoor cat since she was born. I care enough that i would gladly leave if i could afford it.

I dont understand what she wants from me. I told her i would keep the cats locked up when shes here. But she claims the ER doctor stated the cat allergens will travel through the AC and get to her. First she wanted me to pay for some catio outside. Now shes saying that she'll pay for it. Shes obsessively nagging at her daughter about the risks of cats. My niece said shes become obsessive about it. I get the feeling her husband is pinching her about it.

Theres something really wrong with these people. I am going to just start looking for work. I just dont know what to do because work isnt easy to find where i live. It took me a year to switch last time, and i only went up in pay by $2 which isnt enough to live alone here.

Ive been worrying about my health too. My doctor wants to keep up the hormone medication for the abnormal cells in my uterus. i have been on treatment since 08/2019. I dont know if this should still be going on. I want a second opinion but its hard to find a doctor to trust. They want to increase my medication and insert an IUD on top of that. It feels like they just want to make as much money as possible.
Your sister needs to discuss Rx and OTC "allergy" and asthma medications with a doctor who is qualified and who understands that this is a treatable problem and that your cats are FAMILY. I can't even begin to express how upset I am with these people, as it wouldn't be printable. Plenty of people with pulmonary conditions live with their beloved cats. My mother had COPD and no way would she give up her cat. She had a lot of different meds and near the end of her life, oxygen as well. It's doable. Many people make adjustments. You just have to CARE and WANT TO be part of a solution, not an ongoing problem. *PRAYERS* for you all, and for me not to lose it on this situation.
Also *PRAYERS* for you to find a workable solution in terms of livelihood and a place to live where you are not constantly in fear, anxiety and stress because other people are too self-absorbed and unwilling to realize they live with others and are not the only ones:fuming::fuming::fuming: worthy of consideration.
As for your health, I believe it will improve, probably greatly, when you get out of this nest of vipers once and for all.
 

Lari

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I wonder if you could see a midwife rather than a gynecologist. One of the reasons I chose one for my pregnancy is that they aren't as quick to suggest too many interventions and see things in a more holistic way.

Hopefully you can find a new job soon.
 

terestrife

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Your sister needs to discuss Rx and OTC "allergy" and asthma medications with a doctor who is qualified and who understands that this is a treatable problem and that your cats are FAMILY. I can't even begin to express how upset I am with these people, as it wouldn't be printable. Plenty of people with pulmonary conditions live with their beloved cats. My mother had COPD and no way would she give up her cat. She had a lot of different meds and near the end of her life, oxygen as well. It's doable. Many people make adjustments. You just have to CARE and WANT TO be part of a solution, not an ongoing problem. *PRAYERS* for you all, and for me not to lose it on this situation.
Also *PRAYERS* for you to find a workable solution in terms of livelihood and a place to live where you are not constantly in fear, anxiety and stress because other people are too self-absorbed and unwilling to realize they live with others and are not the only ones:fuming::fuming::fuming: worthy of consideration.
As for your health, I believe it will improve, probably greatly, when you get out of this nest of vipers once and for all.
Sorry to have disappeared, been feeling down these past couple of weeks.

My sister will only take Benadryl before sleep. I offered a non-sleep allergy med that works for me and she said no. She says she doesnt want to gain weight by taking allergy medications. :rolleyes: Her husband is into fitness and shes gotten insanely thin. She hasnt asked me to get rid of the cats, she just wants to build a catio on the porch and shove them in there. I understand that shes worried about her health, i dont like the thought of someone being unable to breathe. She thinks i dont care, and she doesnt want to be on medication.

I got into a big fight with my niece today. I have been trying to work with her to teach her child to leave the cats alone and today she just got annoyed. I never treat him badly, if anything i just try to divert his focus as that usually works best with children. She has no idea how to discipline a child. I am no expert, but smacking a childs butt (she doest do it hard) for everything and the constant hysterical yelling is just making him more aggressive. He screams and hits because thats what he is being taught. Shes too ignorant to realize this.

She started complaining again about the cat hair and complaining that she does most of the cleaning. Which she should do since she lives here for free. I used to do most of the cleaning in my old home because i was one of the people not working. I still help out here, but the ones making the most mess are her and her son.

The cats hairs do get around. I cant run the robot vacuum twice a day anymore because her son chases/turns it off. I bought the device because i have back problems and cant use the big vacuum.

She actually told me i should move the cats into my room when her son is downstairs. And that her mom agrees with her. I told her it was up to her to teach her child how to treat animals. She says shes teaching him but she cant watch him all the time. Which is complete BS. I helped raise many nieces and nephews. You have to be present and teach them things. Not sitting on your phone on the kitchen table because you cant be bothered.

I know this sounds awful, i have never wished anyone harm, and i dont wish my niece harm. But i sometimes wish she would just disappear. She actually slipped and said this was HER house. I told her it was my home too and she kind of stuttered as if she felt she had more rights. I told her the cats shouldnt be less important than her child, and they shouldnt be locked up to make things more convenient for her.

I told her not to bother asking me for help with her son, or to borrow my car. I help with her child all the time. I just hope she doesnt start treating the cats badly because i know how horrible she can be. She can be kind if you are fake and treat her kindly. But she hides a very ugly personality. The other day she was saying a neighbor is abusive to their dog because they were yelling at their dog. Meanwhile she had her dog in a hot garage, bleeding from ticks and fleas. She doesnt see her own ugliness.

Her bday is coming up next week and i want to be a jerk and not even give her the gift i got her. Thankfully shes wasting her stimulus money on a disney trip so i will be rid of her for 3 days. It will be a relief not to hear her and her son screaming at the top of their lungs all day long.

She has no idea how lucky she is that she gets to stay home for free. Her bf doesnt always pay rent (due to health issues.) Shes delusional.

I kept being stubborn and not wanting to leave my job, but i think im going to have to start applying everywhere. My job is letting us stay remote through summer. But the money i make just isnt enough. I texted my brother for help. He read my text and ignored it. I was telling him not to forget me that i really wanted to be able to move in with him when possible.

I considered talking to my sister, but i dont want to escalate things. I keep thinking about moving the cats into my room, but i know how miserable that will make them. My cat Kitty cries for hours when i have to lock her up. And worse, i already struggle badly with insomnia and being sleepy all day. They dont let me sleep when theyre in my room. My mood is less stable the more sleep deprived i become.

Im not perfect and dont like inconveniencing others. Just want to be on my own so i wont need to deal with anyones mood swings.

I wonder if you could see a midwife rather than a gynecologist. One of the reasons I chose one for my pregnancy is that they aren't as quick to suggest too many interventions and see things in a more holistic way.

Hopefully you can find a new job soon.
I can look into it. Thanks for the suggestion. I just had a bad experience with a regular gyno. She got panicky when i told her what i had and she said i should only go to a gyno/oncologist. What i have is precancerous, so im not sure why she acted the way she did. She made me and my niece so nervous that we didnt even ask her any questions.

All i wanted was for her to give me an IUD and she refused. I had to specifically go to a gyno/oncologist. Not sure if a midwife would be willing to help me.

I have another appointment next Thursday. They are switching me from megestrol to an IUD (mirena) the doctor is hoping this will help finally clear things up. He is worried that its been over a year. Even though things have greatly improved, he want things completely cleared up.
 

Lari

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I'm so glad you stood up for yourself! I hope it doesn't backfire on the cats, either, but they couldn't just keep pushing you.

Keep applying! Even outside Miami! Like if you were able to get a job in another city, your cats would manage a few hour drive.

I hope the Mirena works.
 

terestrife

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I'm so glad you stood up for yourself! I hope it doesn't backfire on the cats, either, but they couldn't just keep pushing you.

Keep applying! Even outside Miami! Like if you were able to get a job in another city, your cats would manage a few hour drive.

I hope the Mirena works.
I have started looking. Just worried because the only job i have had is secretarial and those dont pay so well. My first job paid $13 and my current one $15. I dont think i could handle taking on a second job. Im tired all the time, and randomly fall asleep during the day. The medicine i am on causes fatigue. When i was working on campus i had to use my lunch hour to sleep in my car just to make it through the day.

Not sure what kind of job i can switch into that would pay enough for an apartment.
 

rubysmama

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wasting her stimulus money on a disney trip
Yeah, that sounds like the best way to spend the money. :rolleyes3:

However, speaking of Disney, are there any decent paying jobs with them, or any of the parks? Or hotels? Restaurants? Is the cost of living in Orlando higher or lower than Miami?
 

Lari

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Yeah, that sounds like the best way to spend the money. :rolleyes3:

However, speaking of Disney, are there any decent paying jobs with them, or any of the parks? Or hotels? Restaurants? Is the cost of living in Orlando higher or lower than Miami?
Or Tampa? I don't know much about cost of living in Florida, but I have relatives over on the west side near there, and I know they're not super rich.
 

terestrife

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Yeah, that sounds like the best way to spend the money. :rolleyes3:

However, speaking of Disney, are there any decent paying jobs with them, or any of the parks? Or hotels? Restaurants? Is the cost of living in Orlando higher or lower than Miami?
I know. She owes back taxes, and has an expired license along with unpaid tickets. But she decided to go to disney. lol

I will look into disney i hadnt thought to do that. I thought i had read an article that stated disney fired many employees due to the pandemic, so i would be a little nervous to be unstable in an unknown area.

Or Tampa? I don't know much about cost of living in Florida, but I have relatives over on the west side near there, and I know they're not super rich.
Oddly enough this website says orlando is cheap to live in. I am going to look for jobs around these areas.

10 Cheapest Places to Live in Florida | Affordable Cities


-

Havent really spoken to my niece today. Not sure if she plans to ignore her son when he chases the cats, but he was following them around a few minutes ago and she said nothing. I had told her not to ask for my help with anything anymore and shes vindictive enough to not watch him.

I might talk to my sister to see if she lets me enclose an area upstairs (that my niece wants as a second play area.) I have the feeling she will say no as she doesnt want the cats upstairs. Or downstairs for that matter. The only other solution is to lock them up and i figure out how i get to sleep.

This will make me sound awful but at this point i am annoyed with everyone, my niece, her son, and even the cats. I just had to eat dinner standing up near the cats gate, so the cats wouldnt obsessively follow me for attention.

Im starting to think i should look around to see if i can do therapy. Im starting to worry about my mental health. I dont know if its the hormones i am on, or the stress, thats causing my mental instability. I dont like that i feel annoyed when the cats try to rub my legs and meow for attention.

It scares me that i was so annoyed with my niece that i had the negative thought that i wouldnt care if she disappeared. Since i was young i struggled with unresolved mental health issues. But no matter how angry i got, i never wanted anyone to go away. I'm a strong believer in karma and think you can bring bad things to yourself by having such negative thoughts.

I do know that when i am completely alone in the house, i feel at peace, and get along with the cats. I think its the stress thats really triggering my irritation because i feel powerless.
 

Willowy

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I read somewhere that something like 80% of jobs in Orlando are with the tourism/service industries. So obviously the pandemic will have had a major effect on Orlando, but once a lot of people are vaccinated they'll need to replace all the employees who wandered off when there wasn't enough work for them. And of course most service jobs aren't super high paying so the cost of living can't be too high. So that does sound promising, I hope you can find something you like! :vibes:
 

Lari

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Ooh, that's a good list. Gainesville sounds promising since it has a university and you're already working for one. But hopefully you can find something good.

I see my therapist via telehealth. Granted, I used to see her in person before the pandemic, but teletherapy is a good option.
 

Jcatbird

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I know that parts of that area of Florida are less expensive. I have friends just outside of Gainesville and they love it there on a budget. You are not alone in dealing with family stress. Talking to a therapist might make a huge difference for you. Just getting it out and having some positive feedback can release some of the tension. Writing it out here and having positive feedback too. I think many are under stress these days and having to deal with personalities that don’t necessarily match up with your own is hard. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other. You are a strong person and you will come out on the other side of this. Is there anywhere you can just go out for a walk away from everything for a little while? When I am most stressed, a little breather helps me. No talk, no stress, a few deep breaths and just a beautiful big sky or fresh air for a few minutes.
 

terestrife

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I read somewhere that something like 80% of jobs in Orlando are with the tourism/service industries. So obviously the pandemic will have had a major effect on Orlando, but once a lot of people are vaccinated they'll need to replace all the employees who wandered off when there wasn't enough work for them. And of course most service jobs aren't super high paying so the cost of living can't be too high. So that does sound promising, I hope you can find something you like! :vibes:
Thank you! I will start looking and applying today. :heartshape:

Ooh, that's a good list. Gainesville sounds promising since it has a university and you're already working for one. But hopefully you can find something good.

I see my therapist via telehealth. Granted, I used to see her in person before the pandemic, but teletherapy is a good option.
That crossed my mind, to look around universities in the area. Secretary jobs dont pay well and that worries me.

I know that parts of that area of Florida are less expensive. I have friends just outside of Gainesville and they love it there on a budget. You are not alone in dealing with family stress. Talking to a therapist might make a huge difference for you. Just getting it out and having some positive feedback can release some of the tension. Writing it out here and having positive feedback too. I think many are under stress these days and having to deal with personalities that don’t necessarily match up with your own is hard. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other. You are a strong person and you will come out on the other side of this. Is there anywhere you can just go out for a walk away from everything for a little while? When I am most stressed, a little breather helps me. No talk, no stress, a few deep breaths and just a beautiful big sky or fresh air for a few minutes.
The neighborhood i live in now is nice so i do go for occasional walks. I sometimes go to a little shopping center nearby and just walk around for a few hours. Thank you for your kind words, they mean a lot to me right now. This morning hasnt been a good morning.

UPDATE:

My sister called me up and told me they're coming to visit in 3 weeks. So she wants me to either stick the cats in a hot/tick infested garage thats full of poison (in miami heat). Or to stick them in my room. Says shes coming by more often because shes stupidly giving $100,000 to our youngest brother to do a business. Mind you, i love this brother, but he went to prison for racketeering, money laundry and theft. lol Shes a moron to give him money to do some business. He isnt a bad person and will help you when needed, but he cant change his past actions.

They plan on moving down soon, so i will be stuck dealing with her and her husband. My niece and i had gotten into a fight the other day where she was whining that she couldnt watch her son constantly to stop him from chasing the cats. So i thought she had something to do with this. She swears she didnt suggest that my cats get locked up, but im sure she kept complaining about not being able to control her son. They act like a 2 year old is impossible to correct and teach. My sister claims she wants the cats locked up to protect them from the baby and so her breathing wont be affected.

So, they are going to be in my room. I cant be so selfish that i shove them in a hot garage for my convenience. But I barely sleep and my room its the only place i can escape to. I dont know how i am going to handle having the cats in there 24/7 not letting me sleep and filling the room with litter. Dealing with kitty trying to dash out the door every time i go out. You guys know i get frustrated/overwhelmed very easily right now.

Its also not fair to them to be stuck in such a tiny room. Its not fair to them just because my niece would rather play on her phone than to watch her child. Then again, they can barely roam around as is because her son is downstairs 24/7. So maybe this will be an improvement.

I badly want to have at least a one bedroom apartment so the cats can have the living room, and i have my own space to escape to.

Work:
I didnt want to get a second job because of the fatigue from the medicine i am on. But i think i might not have a choice at this point. I was wondering if it would be a mistake to ask my boss for advice on getting promoted with MDC. But i worry this will be a huge mistake as no one wants their employees to leave and have to look for a new person.

I can also ask the assistant chair for help as we are friendly. But i was always advised not to mention at work when i am thinking of switching jobs.
 

tarasgirl06

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Thank you! I will start looking and applying today. :heartshape:



That crossed my mind, to look around universities in the area. Secretary jobs dont pay well and that worries me.



The neighborhood i live in now is nice so i do go for occasional walks. I sometimes go to a little shopping center nearby and just walk around for a few hours. Thank you for your kind words, they mean a lot to me right now. This morning hasnt been a good morning.

UPDATE:

My sister called me up and told me they're coming to visit in 3 weeks. So she wants me to either stick the cats in a hot/tick infested garage thats full of poison (in miami heat). Or to stick them in my room. Says shes coming by more often because shes stupidly giving $100,000 to our youngest brother to do a business. Mind you, i love this brother, but he went to prison for racketeering, money laundry and theft. lol Shes a moron to give him money to do some business. He isnt a bad person and will help you when needed, but he cant change his past actions.

They plan on moving down soon, so i will be stuck dealing with her and her husband. My niece and i had gotten into a fight the other day where she was whining that she couldnt watch her son constantly to stop him from chasing the cats. So i thought she had something to do with this. She swears she didnt suggest that my cats get locked up, but im sure she kept complaining about not being able to control her son. They act like a 2 year old is impossible to correct and teach. My sister claims she wants the cats locked up to protect them from the baby and so her breathing wont be affected.

So, they are going to be in my room. I cant be so selfish that i shove them in a hot garage for my convenience. But I barely sleep and my room its the only place i can escape to. I dont know how i am going to handle having the cats in there 24/7 not letting me sleep and filling the room with litter. Dealing with kitty trying to dash out the door every time i go out. You guys know i get frustrated/overwhelmed very easily right now.

Its also not fair to them to be stuck in such a tiny room. Its not fair to them just because my niece would rather play on her phone than to watch her child. Then again, they can barely roam around as is because her son is downstairs 24/7. So maybe this will be an improvement.

I badly want to have at least a one bedroom apartment so the cats can have the living room, and i have my own space to escape to.

Work:
I didnt want to get a second job because of the fatigue from the medicine i am on. But i think i might not have a choice at this point. I was wondering if it would be a mistake to ask my boss for advice on getting promoted with MDC. But i worry this will be a huge mistake as no one wants their employees to leave and have to look for a new person.

I can also ask the assistant chair for help as we are friendly. But i was always advised not to mention at work when i am thinking of switching jobs.
You must stand up for your cats and protect them! They are in your care and (rightly) depend on you for their wellbeing. NO WAY should they be in the garage. Period. As I've mentioned, I've had friends who are "allergic" who have taken drugs for that so that they could live with their beloved cats. My mom had COPD and told the doctor flat out that keeping her cat was non-negotiable. One good thing about a catio is that, in my experience at least, they will love being there. My cats were in their catio almost all the time except when I had to close the cat doors during snow or sand storms. They had food, water, litter box, lots of toys,climbing/resting furniture etc., and the rail around the room was wide enough for them to recline or sit on. They loved watching the desert creatures going about their lives.
 

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Any chance the catio could be off your bedroom window? That could be left open for them to come and go and be out of the heat as needed. Miami is pretty hot in summer. A catio there should be well reinforced with a heavy mesh metal hardware cloth and plenty of high places for the cats as well as an outer layer of bug screen. I know having them in your room 24/7 is hard but better than risking their health which would cause far more upset.
I called my friends in the Gainesville area today. He happens to be in real estate. He says that cost of living in your area is higher. Further north in Florida is lower. He also says there are three colleges in his area. It might be worth exploring a little further up from Miami. He tells me that areas just outside of the towns are lower as well. I’ve been to their place and it’s a small town just outside of Gainesville. One county over. It’s really pretty and peaceful there with nice people. You and your kitties deserve a nice life.
 

terestrife

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y are in your care and (rightly) depend on you for their wellbeing. NO WAY should they be in the garage. Period. As I've mentione
Dont worry, the cats are going in my room. I have no other choice at this point. Not sure how they will handle it. I am also worried my sister will be dramatic and claim that their allergens are magically traveling through the AC and ask me to stick them in the garage. I am praying i can make the cats and myself comfortable in my room.

The catio cant be built until my sister can afford it, and who knows when that will be. Going to try to rearrange my room to fit all their things. I found on amazon some tents that you can put over a bed. I might buy it to keep them from jumping on my bed. Since i struggle with sleeping now.

My niece started speaking to me again. But i am still angry that my cats need to be locked up. My sister is magically allergic to the steroids she took and wont take any medication. Shes always been dramatic and gets sick easily. My mom always suspected she made herself sick for some reason. She just so happen to get hives from the steroids. I would personally just stay in a hotel if i could avoid causing problems. But this is her home after all, so i cant complain.

i still think my niece was complaining to her mom that she was incapable of watching her own son to keep him from hurting the cats. I am angry that shes so lazy and irresponsible. I hate that i have to put up a nice front to avoid living in a house where people ignore each other and theres tension.

Any chance the catio could be off your bedroom window? That could be left open for them to come and go and be out of the heat as needed. Miami is pretty hot in summer. A catio there should be well reinforced with a heavy mesh metal hardware cloth and plenty of high places for the cats as well as an outer layer of bug screen. I know having them in your room 24/7 is hard but better than risking their health which would cause far more upset.
I called my friends in the Gainesville area today. He happens to be in real estate. He says that cost of living in your area is higher. Further north in Florida is lower. He also says there are three colleges in his area. It might be worth exploring a little further up from Miami. He tells me that areas just outside of the towns are lower as well. I’ve been to their place and it’s a small town just outside of Gainesville. One county over. It’s really pretty and peaceful there with nice people. You and your kitties deserve a nice life.
The catio my sister wants to build is when she gets some random money shes been expecting for months now. So the cats either go in the garage, or my bedroom for now. They're going to have to go to my bedroom. I dont want them in a hot/tick infested garage. I'm not sure if i can attach a catio outside my window but i dont really want to be spending extra money right now.

The catio will eventually be in the front porch, my bedroom is upstairs.

I'll look into gainesville, oddly enough my niece also mentioned the area to me. Let me see if i find some colleges there to apply for. Thank you for checking for me! :heartshape: I've actually wanted to move somewhere that quiet with less people. Miami is full of people so we have a lot of traffic and chaos.
 

Jcatbird

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I spent a lot of time in Miami and many parts of Florida. Miami was getting rather crowded the last time I was there. It is pretty there but so much of Florida is lovely. I hope you can find someplace that will give you all you desire. Family is great to have but maybe you could enjoy them more if you weren’t having to deal with anyone who has allergies or worry about a small child. If anyone does say anything about the AC bringing allergens in, there are filters you can put on your bedroom vent! Of course there are heaps filters for the air return that should work pretty well for the house but I thought that taking it a step further and being prepared with a new answer might put you a step ahead if it comes up. ;) I have an allergic step sister. She doesn’t visit often but I am prepared.
 

rubysmama

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I'll look into gainesville, oddly enough my niece also mentioned the area to me. Let me see if i find some colleges there to apply for. Thank you for checking for me! :heartshape: I've actually wanted to move somewhere that quiet with less people. Miami is full of people so we have a lot of traffic and chaos.
I really hope you can find something at one of those colleges, so you can move away from Miami, and get a new start with your kitties. Good luck. :heartshape:
 

tarasgirl06

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Ever-thoughtful Jcatbird Jcatbird has some good suggestions! Being proactive is something very important to me, especially since my last divorce and having to DIY. Or, have you thought about moving out of Florida entirely and checking out states with better climate, lower cost of living/population/crime etc.? Just a thought.
 
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