Trust

[losna]

I was just rubbing around Sinbad's eyes, and reflecting on how much he's changed since we adopted him.

When he first arrived, he would only take scritches on the top of his head, right between his ears. Any body touches or attempts to touch anywhere else on his head would scare him off. Now he wants full body rubs, and he'll sort of slide along my hands when I pet him to make sure he gets them. He loves it when I rub his face now, particularly around his eyes. He'll even sit still for me when I wipe his nose when he's sick to avoid cat snot getting everywhere, and when I clean the discharge from around his eyes. More than that, when he sees me coming his way with the cloth he starts to purr and angles his head up to make it easier for me - it's as though he sees it as me grooming him.

He used to sleep curled tightly in enclosed spaces; behind his cat post, in boxes, under the bed, etc. Now he sprawls belly up and throat exposed wherever he happens to be. Literally - he'll just flop out wherever, even in the middle of the hallways or rooms, in doorframes. We have to be careful about walking because we never know when he'll be underfoot snoozing. He has his favorite sleeping places of course, but that doesn't mean he won't sack out anywhere else when it's time for a nap.

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• losna
• Aug 3, 2015

Tempest is very similar - it took her weeks before she would come out from hiding, now she wriggles around happily all over the floor when I go in to her room. I was super excited the first time she let me pick her up (although she still won't trust me to hold her outside her safe room). Tempest actually trusts my husband so much that she let the vet bury her face against her belly! She was so excited by the softness of Tempest's fur she couldn't resist, it was pretty unexpected both that she did that and that Tempest let her! Tempest is a glutton for belly rubs, but it was clear she allowed it because my hubby was there.

I'm curious what are other things that cats do to show their trust. Share some stories!

 

[macha 143]

Sinbad is adorable, I love that pic, great story...

As for Macha, still very cautious with strangers, once she heard the door bell she will be hiding under the bed. I am trying to comfort her and will keep telling her that there's no danger. I want her  to be comfortable with others, sociable and maybe it would take sometime but I am sure she would someday.

She trusted me enough by carrying her around on my shoulder, she would stay there few minutes. She allowed me to clean her teeth, clean her ears and clean her precious backside lol she would walk between my legs, so worried sometimes I might hurt her without noticing she's there. She would trust me too by checking her fur if there's some fleas, she would allow me any inspections that needs to be done...poor baby her eyes so huge and looks like telling me "enough please" She enjoyed kissing her on her chain and her belly, too cute and of course purring like a motor,

Cats are so smart, intelligent and amazing, they know whom they can trust. :-)

 

[Anne]

It is so rewarding when you can the trust of a shy or timid cat. Taming feral cats can be very gratifying in that sense. I had a timid cat who was rescued after probably having been abused and dumped in a pit. He was very scared of people in general so gaining his trust and having him spend time in my lap was so wonderful. He passed two years ago 

 

[feralvr]

I am so happy to see that photo of Sinbad. There is NO other feeling on the planet, (IMO ), that is a greater or more rewarding, fruitful and gratifying than the love and trust from a once feral cat.

When I had my horse, years back, I took care of the feral barn kitties making sure they were all altered. There was one - Chloe, a brown tortie kitty. It literally took her SEVEN years (seriously....) before she allowed me to look at her for more than a minute AND for her to begin to approach me (within 10 feet) while I set down her food bowl. Day in and day out, we had the same exact routine. THEN, ONE DAY, she must have been about 10 years or so, I drove into the barn and she was sitting right next to the door into the lounge room. The door I came out of day after day, year after year to feed the cats. From that day forward, she waited by that door. We decided to leave the door open a bit and she soon ventured in about two feet and would just sit and watch the going's on. As the weeks went on and winter was approaching - end of November at this point - she decided to come in further and get up on an old couch we had near the door where she was coming. I put a nice thick blanket on that couch for the next day's visit. Soon enough, and to make a long story short, she stayed INSIDE and never left. Eventually, I could sit on that couch next to her and gently stroke her under the chin and behind her ears. She never allowed me to pet her body though. That was perfectly fine with me. My heart exploded with joy the day I sat next to her and I filled up with tears - streaming down my face. I couldn't believe that after ALL of these years she was ready to give in to love and give up the treacherous life of the outdoors, never wanting to endure another COLD winter...... I will never forget that kitty, Chloe.

 

[losna]

Yeah, Sinbad's trust is kind of humbling. He trusts my hubby too, but not nearly as much as me. He won't even move when I approach him sleeping, and if I touch him, he'll just purr a little and roll to make his tummy more available. I think that plus letting me rub around his eyes are the two things that display his trust for me the most.

I can't get any pics of Tempest sleeping because she wakes up when anyone approaches her. But she was abandoned 4 times that we know of, so she is still learning to trust us. The more she trusts us the more adorable she becomes though. There are times she is downright kittenish in her delight, then she remembers herself and backs off.

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• losna
• Oct 31, 2015

My hubby is amazing with scared cats. They call him the Cat Whisperer at the shelter where we volunteer, and have him socialize the most traumatized kitties. Even cats that do nothing but hide and run away from the slightest noise will trust him enough to let him pick them up and purr and snuggle him. This little sweety for example, was so terrified she wouldn't even come out to eat.  But he had her like this after just an afternoon!

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• losna
• Oct 31, 2015

Chloe sounds amazing. I know from how it felt the first time Tempest let me pick her up, and the first time Sinbad flopped belly up in front of me that I'd have been crying all over the place too.

 

[bodisha]

Congratulations on socializing your cat  

I took my cat in as sort of a rescue.  His original owner was a drunken jerk from what I've been told.  Going as far as breaking Merlin's read leg (He walks with a limp these days), and laughing about how tough he was for taking it.  I got him thru his sister, who took Merlin in when her brother went to jail for something.  I guess he promised to get Merlin after he got out of jail, but never took him back after he got out.  Her family had him for about 2 years, but mostly just fed him and ignored him.  He had a reputation for being a mean, anti-social cat while they had him, and her kids never really liked him much.  With their teenage son kicking him and throwing things at him.  When I would visit my friends, I would play with him if he approached me.  Granted when he played he played rough.  Her husband was always amazed that I was one of the few people he would let pick him up.  Although he never wanted to be held very long and would jump down almost immediately.  At one point her husband got tired of him clawing at their furniture and wanted to get rid of him.  Because he had such a bad temperament, and reputation no one wanted him.  I felt bad for the cat when he started talking about putting him to sleep because he couldn't find a home for him and my love of "underdogs" kicked in and I agreed to take him.

After I got him, I would make a point to pick him up and pet him.  For the first few months, as soon as he started purring he seemed to freak out and always jumped down.  Sometimes biting or scratching me in the process.  From what I've read, purring can be a very stimulating thing for a cat.  My best guess is he was never pet'ed to the point anyone got him purring and he never got use to this.  When I would get him to start purring, it was simply to much for him and he'd freak out a bit.  I didn't give up and kept picking him up and petting him.  Always letting him jump freely down when he wanted.  Eventually he got to the point he was comfortable with purring, and would let me hold and pet him for an extended amount of time.  He's still not the most affectionate cat, but today I can count on a couple good petting sessions a week that he seems to absolutely love.

One of the things he likes is to flop down on the tile in my kitchen.  He rolls over on his back exposing his belly and neck to me when he does this.  At first, I use to pet him while he laid there, which he seemed to enjoy up to a point.  When I first got Merlin, when he was done being petted he would bite me.  Not horribly hard, but hard enough he made his point. These days he let's me know he's done being petted by just sort of moving towards my arm like he's going to bite... it but he doesn't actually do it (Usually doesn't at least).  After a while of him flopping down on my kitchen tile like this, I realized he didn't want to be petted.  Rather he just enjoyed me being with him as he laid there.  I'll get down on all fours near him (Yes I feel dumb doing this) and he'll rest his rear paws on my hand or arm and he just lay's there.  I've come to the conclusion that this is somehow his idea of cuddling.  

Normally he's not an overly affectionate cat, and when he wants attention it's on his terms.  The exception to this is after he's woke up from a good long nap, or if I've been gone a couple hours.  Both times he seems to want to assurance that everything is ok and will lay on my chest as I pet him.  He particularly loves being petted around the temples, cheeks, chin, and neck.  I always find it cute when he sticks his chin up and exposes his neck to me because he wants me to scratch him there.

He's still a rowdy and ornery cat.  But like I tell a friend of mine.... He's my little furry pain in the ass. 

 

[muircat]

Your stories are all so nice! 

With my cat, I adopted him when we was around 4 months old. He was apparently found outside probably a couple weeks before this, so I don't really know his background, although I assume he at least lived outside for part of his live because of how skittish he is. For the first couple weeks I kept him closed in my room (maybe it would have helped if he stayed in a room by himself for at first, but there wasn't really any other room to close him in), and the first night he was hissing and growling the whole night. He stayed under my bed for the first few days and wouldn't eat or let me touch him. After four or five days, he finally let me pet him and he loved it so much. Maybe no one had ever pet him before. =P I spent probably fifteen minutes petting him, and he was purring the whole time, and really wanted me to pet him, although I think he was still terrified too.

After that it still took another week or so before he was comfortable with me, and would play with me. I even taught him to sit on command after that.

Now he follows me around the house, except for when he's really sleeping, and he still loves it when I pet him. He always has this expression he does when he wants me to pet him, which of course he does several times a day. He knows a few more tricks now as well! He's still pretty skittish though, isn't comfortable with some of my family members who live with him, and is terrified of strangers. But we have lots of time to work on that, since he's only about a year and a half old!

He's my first cat, so I don't really have any idea if a lot of cats are like this or not, but I think he's quite special.