Took In Two 1 Yr Old Ferals

calicosrspecial

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The main reason the water works in places like Canada but not Texas is because the way they design piping is different. In Texas older homes it goes through the attic and along the exterior walls. In Canada they will often times heat the plumbing with an electrical circuit. That’s what I have heard anyway.

I have bad news.... and I’m writing this in tears.

I had to put Ginger down today. I’m crushed over it. It all came suddenly and very unexpectedly. In the past I’ve made post about being concerned that Ginger had hypothermia of which I took him to the vet several times for, had blood work and X-rays but nothing came of it. Well yesterday he was breathing very hard and acted like he wanted to vomit but he couldn’t. I waited a day and sure enough his breathing was just as bad so I took him to a vet. After seeing him they became so concerned about his condition they told me to come inside even despite Covid.

Well... ... the vet gave me his XRays and showed me his lungs were heavily compacted by fluid and were only 1/3rd of the size they should be. They found fluid between his abdomen and lungs and his stomach had a tumor and they suspected cancer. The anxiety of the vet visit pushed him and he could no longer breath normally and they had to put him on oxygen. When I saw him he was struggling for life. They told me he would need to see a hospital and the chances of his survival were extremely low. They would have to first sedate him and drain the fluids, which they didn’t expect him to survive, then the hospital would have to remove the tumor and perform chemotherapy on which they also didn’t expect he would survive and.. heavily recommended me putting him down.

I went in the room with him remembering when I got him as a kitten 10 years ago. When he was a kitten he and his brother Marshmallow were sick with a flu and they were about 2 or 3 months of age. The animal shelter didn’t expect either of them to survive it and recommended I adopt other cats but I took them anyway. It was a struggle but I managed to get him back to health ... I could tell how grateful he was because he would come and sit on my lap and aggressively knead me and when I was laying down he would come to me and knead me. I did a whole bunch of things I shouldn’t have done like taking him cross country to Seattle with me when I moved there, then stashing him and myself as well as Marshmallow in hotels (family issues, we went through periods of homelessness). I just wasn’t willing to let him go and he was basically like my child and was willing to risk my safety and break rules to be with him and keep him. Today that didn’t pan out though because I didn’t want him to suffer that way. It was by far the most painful thing I have ever done.

I stayed there with him and comforted him as best I could but he was hardly coherent at this point, he was coughing out fluids and couldn’t catch his breath. I put my hand on his head and told him I loved him.. repeatedly .. again and again as they gave him the lethal injection...I felt him slowly slipping away.. becoming from the pet I held close and deeply to me to ... lifelessness... it killed me... I’ve never felt anything like that before... I stood there till the end where he passed away... because I was the one who was there for him from the start, I couldnt leave him to suffer this alone.. ..but it doesn’t make anything feel better.. I’m pretty crushed right now.
Last night he barged into my bedroom where I keep Sandy away from the other cats and he badly wanted to be with me and I put him back outside because I can’t trust what may happen with Sandy and other cats whiles I’m asleep. He wanted to sleep with me because he knew his time was coming.. I didn’t even know anything was wrong. I didn’t even hold him one last time.

R.I.P Ginger.

View attachment 370875

😭 I am crying as I read this as well. Loss is so hard. He is such a handsome fella.

But he had the greatest gifts of all. LOVE and LIFE. Your love you had for him. Your love gave him life and a great life full of love. The fact you saved him from the shelter, got him healthy. And 10 years of life that would not have happened without you. The bind, the love we have with them and they have with us is indescribable but amazing. They very much are our loved ones. Family.

Sadly, the last thing we experience is the most traumatic. Loss is the worst. But I have been through this too many times to recount and have found that focusing on all the good times, all the love, helps somewhat. I truly believe they never leave our heart, they are always with us. And all the good times and experiences and love remain with us.

It is horrible and no words can ease the deep pain we feel going through this. Life is precious and Ginger had a great life. And whatever length we get with them it is a treasure. And enjoying and treasuring that time is important. I think there are many cats in the world that wished they could have led the life of Ginger. He was lucky as were you to find him.

Please be proud for saving his life and giving him a great 10 years. And never forget that the love will always be there.

RIP Ginger. A life well lived!!
 
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MikeAW2010

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😭 I am crying as I read this as well. Loss is so hard. He is such a handsome fella.

But he had the greatest gifts of all. LOVE and LIFE. Your love you had for him. Your love gave him life and a great life full of love. The fact you saved him from the shelter, got him healthy. And 10 years of life that would not have happened without you. The bind, the love we have with them and they have with us is indescribable but amazing. They very much are our loved ones. Family.

Sadly, the last thing we experience is the most traumatic. Loss is the worst. But I have been through this too many times to recount and have found that focusing on all the good times, all the love, helps somewhat. I truly believe they never leave our heart, they are always with us. And all the good times and experiences and love remain with us.

It is horrible and no words can ease the deep pain we feel going through this. Life is precious and Ginger had a great life. And whatever length we get with them it is a treasure. And enjoying and treasuring that time is important. I think there are many cats in the world that wished they could have led the life of Ginger. He was lucky as were you to find him.

Please be proud for saving his life and giving him a great 10 years. And never forget that the love will always be there.

RIP Ginger. A life well lived!!
Do you think that the cold weather we got could have did this? He was kept inside only and although it did get cold in my house it stayed well above freezing. Maybe at the lowest we got to 50? Maybe that’s why he wanted to come in so I could keep him warm.
 

calicosrspecial

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Do you think that the cold weather we got could have did this? He was kept inside only and although it did get cold in my house it stayed well above freezing. Maybe at the lowest we got to 50? Maybe that’s why he wanted to come in so I could keep him warm.
I am not a vet but my sense is no. It sounds like there was an underlying issue so the timing was probably the issue rather than the environment.

Were the other cats treating Ginger a little differently lately? Sometimes when a cat falls ill the other animals act a little differently towards the animal and just in general.

We often make decisions in the moment we believe are the best. Of course, not everything is always known BUT I believe people like us tend to want to make the best decisions based on what we know. I think you did everything the best. The last thing you would want is a fight between cats and multiple injuries potentially. I would have done the same. I know it doesn't make it easier but I hope that you aren't hard on yourself. There is no reason you should be. In fact, I hope as time goes by you see how great you have been to him.

You gave Ginger a wonderful life, the best life he could have ever wished for. Once the near term pain and trauma ease you'll be able to focus on all the love and happiness you had together and remember the good times and the positives. And Ginger will always be in your heart, he will never be gone.

Hang in there and please feel free to share the emotions you are feeling. It is really important to talk it out among friends that have felt all those emotions you are now feeling. Having support is really helpful and important.

Thank you so much for being so great to Ginger!!!
 
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MikeAW2010

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I am not a vet but my sense is no. It sounds like there was an underlying issue so the timing was probably the issue rather than the environment.

Were the other cats treating Ginger a little differently lately? Sometimes when a cat falls ill the other animals act a little differently towards the animal and just in general.

We often make decisions in the moment we believe are the best. Of course, not everything is always known BUT I believe people like us tend to want to make the best decisions based on what we know. I think you did everything the best. The last thing you would want is a fight between cats and multiple injuries potentially. I would have done the same. I know it doesn't make it easier but I hope that you aren't hard on yourself. There is no reason you should be. In fact, I hope as time goes by you see how great you have been to him.

You gave Ginger a wonderful life, the best life he could have ever wished for. Once the near term pain and trauma ease you'll be able to focus on all the love and happiness you had together and remember the good times and the positives. And Ginger will always be in your heart, he will never be gone.

Hang in there and please feel free to share the emotions you are feeling. It is really important to talk it out among friends that have felt all those emotions you are now feeling. Having support is really helpful and important.

Thank you so much for being so great to Ginger!!!
It’s very difficult to cope with right now. I’ve cried off and on all day. I woke up in the middle of the night calling for him and telling I will see him again in the afterlife which I’m praying I do. I miss him to death. I went scrolling through pictures I have of him through the ten years we’ve been together from his kitten hood till now and found a few where he was snuggling with me and I broke down. I don’t know how to really cope with it. Every time I go to the living room it’s like something is missing and you know you will never see it again. I took this day off of work to grieve. I’m still not really ready to go back but don’t have a choice. I watched him go from a living and breathing creature to lifelessness. I have spent the whole day with Marshmallow, he is Ginger’s brother. It’s been tough doing that too because it brings up the memories. I can’t help but wonder if Marshmallow notices it or feels anything.

I dug up a lot of photos and emailed them to myself. I was thinking of capturing one of them on my desktop to always remind me. I’m not sure if it’s a good idea because it also brings pain but at the same time I don’t want to forget
 

calicosrspecial

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It’s very difficult to cope with right now. I’ve cried off and on all day. I woke up in the middle of the night calling for him and telling I will see him again in the afterlife which I’m praying I do. I miss him to death. I went scrolling through pictures I have of him through the ten years we’ve been together from his kitten hood till now and found a few where he was snuggling with me and I broke down. I don’t know how to really cope with it. Every time I go to the living room it’s like something is missing and you know you will never see it again. I took this day off of work to grieve. I’m still not really ready to go back but don’t have a choice. I watched him go from a living and breathing creature to lifelessness. I have spent the whole day with Marshmallow, he is Ginger’s brother. It’s been tough doing that too because it brings up the memories. I can’t help but wonder if Marshmallow notices it or feels anything.

I dug up a lot of photos and emailed them to myself. I was thinking of capturing one of them on my desktop to always remind me. I’m not sure if it’s a good idea because it also brings pain but at the same time I don’t want to forget
It is VERY difficult to cope. Your reaction is totally normal. That is part of the grieving and healing process. It is intense because of the love for him. Very often we have dreams about them that seem to real we wake up. I know, the missing is so great and though we never stop missing we end up being able to accept it more in time. Personally, I do believe we reunite in the afterlife.

It is good you have the pictures to look at. To remember the good times. Sometimes we forget to take the pictures so the fact you have some helps a lot in my opinion.

I know, we never really know how to cope. We just have to follow our feelings and talk them out. It is a process, it is not easy or fun but we tend to find acceptance that the gift of life comes with an end (physically) as well BUT they remain with us in our hearts, in the way we live. The impact they have on us lasts all our lives. I do know Ginger would not want you to be sad but to be happy that you had a great 10 years together.

I know the feeling. We remember them sitting looking out, or in a bed, or chasing around, or begging to eat. We miss that. But remembering those times helps.

It is good you took a day off but I do think getting back to work tends to help. Sometimes being busier can help us cope better. It is easy to just rethink everything and get into a rut that has no positive endpoint. Rather, being busy, then thinking about the good times, then focusing back on being busy tends to ease the pain. Each person is different but it is important to remember the good times.

I know. I have had animals die in my arms and the trauma is off the charts. It is shocking and it never is easy. But that is because of the love we have. And sometimes we have to chose the humane route that eases the pain and improves the quality of life. I have had to make very hard decisions that are always second guessed or we wish were different. BUT the reality is the reality and the love drives the best decisions. It is never easy but when done from love I think it is the best decision. We wish it could be different but life is never easy or simple or ideal.

It is good to spend time with Marshmallow as he shares the DNA with Ginger. He knows the change so he needs your support and love. It is difficult as the memories come back and the missing gets intense BUT the love will carry you through. And Marshmallow needs you as do the others. It is not a slight to Ginger. He wants you to take good care of them as you have and as you did with him.

I think it is good to see the pictures. I do it all the time and I do believe it helps us remember the good times. Don't worry, you will never forget him.

We know exactly what you are going through and feeling. The ups and the downs, the feeling of heartbreak. The missing, the sadness. Having people to talk it through helps a lot. There are definitely stages that we go through and those initial stages are horrific but the love and the fact they remain in our hearts and have impact our being help immensely. Even though loss is horrific I truly believe the gift of the life we have with them is truly beyond special. And once we realize that gift is greater than the loss it helps us accept to some degree. We always miss them but they always stay in our heart and we never forget. Love lasts forever.

Hang in there. I am crying on and off writing this thinking of all mine I have lost but I also feel lucky to have had them in my life for as long as I did. I am going to give my some extra love and attention today. To celebrate the gift I have with me now. When you look into Marshmallow's eyes or Sandy's or Panda's the love will help you move forward. Ginger would want that and would want you to be happy of your time together. It was a true gift to be given that love.
 
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MikeAW2010

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I have been in tears off and on, work was almost impossible... ...I made this for my baby...
I hope I will see him in the end.
I love and miss you Ginger.
I-love-you-ginger.png
 

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calicosrspecial

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I have been in tears off and on, work was almost impossible... ...I made this for my baby...
I hope I will see him in the end.
I love and miss you Ginger.View attachment 371099
That is BEAUTIFUL!!!

I am in tears reading it. I see all the love and all the good times you two had together in that. It is really special.

It is normal that you are feeling what you are feeling. Letting the emotions flow is good. It isn't easy but you'll remember the good times more and more.

Hang in there. Try to focus on work as I do believe it helps to focus the mind. The trauma will subside. I truly believe we do get reunited.
 
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MikeAW2010

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Gingers loss and the pain thereof has been a heavy contendent to my heart. I miss him deeply and there isn’t a single day that goes by and I don’t think or pray for him.

I took Marshmallow to the vet for tooth extractions to help ease him and his pain as well. Meanwhile Baxter and Louis somehow caught a cold and have been sick for the past week and a half. I had to get them medicine and also eye ointment as their eyes became infected. I don’t know if Ginger has been spiritually paying me visits but every once in awhile Marshmallow will dig his paws into my heart area like Ginger used to do. I don’t remember Marshmallow doing that before. Marshmallow would usually only lay on my side or leg. Then once in awhile usually late at night all the cats in my bedroom will look up at the ceiling for seemingly no reason and gaze it seemingly nothing for long periods. Either way I miss Ginger deeply.

I have been letting Marshmallow sleep with me because I don’t want him to be alone since Ginger is absent. He for the most part has been tolerating Sandy but they do take long fixed gazes at each other. Sandy at first would avoid my bed or my side of the room but she wants to come near me so bad she will run by Marshmallow and come onto the bed so I can pet her. She has interestingly enough been a lot more cautious about swatting me while Marshmallow is in the room. She laid down with me and Marshmallow last night, just above my head and she fell asleep. Later she moved to my side and was comfortable sleeping right next to me even with Marshmallow on the bed. I don’t know if she can feel my grief or not but she seems like she wants to be near me even when she knows there’s potential danger for her although fortunately Marshmallow hasn’t done anything.

She did swat me earlier today while petting her and Marshmallow immediately perked up and glared at her and she glared back and backed off. Nothing happened though and I am keeping them both in check.
 

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Thank you for caring and saving their lives.

I have 4 former feral s from my work living with me, 2 adopted, 3 still going through socialization.

It’s all a matter of time and indifference
 

calicosrspecial

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My neighbor gave this to me

View attachment 373243
THAT IS SO WONDERFUL!!! What a fantastic neighbor!!!

"Gingers loss and the pain thereof has been a heavy contendent to my heart. I miss him deeply and there isn’t a single day that goes by and I don’t think or pray for him." - Awwwwwwww, that love is very special. Hang in there.

"I took Marshmallow to the vet for tooth extractions to help ease him and his pain as well." - Poor Marshmallow. How is he doing?

" Meanwhile Baxter and Louis somehow caught a cold and have been sick for the past week and a half." - Oh my, when it rains it pours. :(

" I had to get them medicine and also eye ointment as their eyes became infected." - At least they should be on the road to recovery.

"I don’t know if Ginger has been spiritually paying me visits but every once in awhile Marshmallow will dig his paws into my heart area like Ginger used to do. I don’t remember Marshmallow doing that before. Marshmallow would usually only lay on my side or leg. Then once in awhile usually late at night all the cats in my bedroom will look up at the ceiling for seemingly no reason and gaze it seemingly nothing for long periods. Either way I miss Ginger deeply." - I have a feeling Ginger is watching over.

"I have been letting Marshmallow sleep with me because I don’t want him to be alone since Ginger is absent." - That is great.

" He for the most part has been tolerating Sandy but they do take long fixed gazes at each other." - Yes. Just reassure them to let them know all is ok. Try to distract them because anytime a cat looks away it shows trust. Try to make their encoutners as positive as possible so they can build trust.

"Sandy at first would avoid my bed or my side of the room but she wants to come near me so bad she will run by Marshmallow and come onto the bed so I can pet her." - Awwwwwwww

" She has interestingly enough been a lot more cautious about swatting me while Marshmallow is in the room." - Great

" She laid down with me and Marshmallow last night, just above my head and she fell asleep. Later she moved to my side and was comfortable sleeping right next to me even with Marshmallow on the bed. " - FANTASTIC!!! She is learning to trust him. Just reassure them that all is ok. If nothing bad happens they will learn to trust.

"I don’t know if she can feel my grief or not but she seems like she wants to be near me even when she knows there’s potential danger for her although fortunately Marshmallow hasn’t done anything." - She knows you are grieving. They are VERY good at knowing what our emotions are.

"She did swat me earlier today while petting her and Marshmallow immediately perked up and glared at her and she glared back and backed off. Nothing happened though and I am keeping them both in check. " - Very good. Just try to reassure them, stay as calm and confident as possible. Try to make their encounters as positive as possible. Distract them when they are staring to de-escalate. And when they look away it shows the other trust which helps.

We'll help you get them to get along. It is all about building trust through positive associations (food, love) and positive encounters. Showing them that the other cat is not a threat to their physical safety or food or water or litter box is the key. Also, try to keep them on a routine and stay calm and confident around them.

Ask any questions.

And hang in there. Loss is never easy but the love carries us through.
 
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MikeAW2010

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It’s been pretty rough dealing with the loss of Ginger. I wasn’t spending a great deal of time with him in the end. I did get moments where I would lay down in the living room and let them lay on me but I was giving Sandy more attention mainly because she was in my room and I’m still socializing her. I keep thinking of how he felt during that time, being rushed into a kennel and to the vet to be handled by strangers and... the next thing he knows he is being put to sleep and doesn’t know why or what happened in this sudden vet visit and he didn’t get to spend very much time with me. I deeply miss him and wish somehow I could make it all up to him. I just thought it was going to be an ordinary vet visit but I ended up putting him to sleep. I didn’t get many words to him either when I signed the papers (they were packed and very busy) ... I saved his life when he was a kitten and he had so much trust in me and then suddenly just... abruptly... I took his life away.
 

calicosrspecial

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It’s been pretty rough dealing with the loss of Ginger. I wasn’t spending a great deal of time with him in the end. I did get moments where I would lay down in the living room and let them lay on me but I was giving Sandy more attention mainly because she was in my room and I’m still socializing her. I keep thinking of how he felt during that time, being rushed into a kennel and to the vet to be handled by strangers and... the next thing he knows he is being put to sleep and doesn’t know why or what happened in this sudden vet visit and he didn’t get to spend very much time with me. I deeply miss him and wish somehow I could make it all up to him. I just thought it was going to be an ordinary vet visit but I ended up putting him to sleep. I didn’t get many words to him either when I signed the papers (they were packed and very busy) ... I saved his life when he was a kitten and he had so much trust in me and then suddenly just... abruptly... I took his life away.
"It’s been pretty rough dealing with the loss of Ginger." - Yes, it is horrible. Loss is horrific. And I have bad news, it doesn't get easier the more you go through it. BUT the times before it with them makes it tolerable. But it is hard to understand that when in the process of grieving. :(

"I wasn’t spending a great deal of time with him in the end." - We ALWAYS feel like we never spent enough time. It is hard. To balance, etc.

"I did get moments where I would lay down in the living room and let them lay on me" - That is very good.

" but I was giving Sandy more attention mainly because she was in my room and I’m still socializing her." - Understandably.

"I keep thinking of how he felt during that time, being rushed into a kennel and to the vet to be handled by strangers and... the next thing he knows he is being put to sleep and doesn’t know why or what happened in this sudden vet visit and he didn’t get to spend very much time with me." - Remember, he wasn't feeling well before that though. So I am guessing he felt that you were helping him. I KNOW we second guess things and are WAY TOO HARD on ourselves BUT you did everything I would have and all of us would have. You did your best but you can't heal everything. Only try your best. It is the hardest thing to make the humane and ebst decision for the animal BUT we tend to hate making that decision. I have done it too many times, cried too many times, felt guilty too many time, felt ill. But we have to do what is best for the animal, what is most humane. We don't want them to suffer. It is hard, I wish it was different, but it is the way it is. :( Life is wonderful but physical life has to end at some point. BUT I do believe cats have souls and they are in heaven safe and happy.

"I deeply miss him and wish somehow I could make it all up to him." - You saved his life as a kitten and gave him a WONDERFUL life. I think he is very thankful. AND you probably saved him from suffering.

" I just thought it was going to be an ordinary vet visit but I ended up putting him to sleep. I didn’t get many words to him either when I signed the papers (they were packed and very busy) ... " - I know, it happens all too fast and typically is a blur. It is shocking and horrible. But I think I know you well and I know your heart was in the right place and you did the right thing. I know that doesn't ease the pain but I hope you see that in time.

"I saved his life when he was a kitten and he had so much trust in me" - And you gave him a life full of love. THAT is special and wonderful!!!

" and then suddenly just... abruptly... " - Yes :(

"I took his life away." - No, the illness did. You saved him from pain and suffering.

All the feeling you are feeling is what we all have gone through. And sadly, you will go through again and again. But the life and love is all worth it. We learn how to heal but I know the feelings remain but we learn to handle them and accept them and look on all the good times and the love.

Hang in there. I KNOW all the feelings you are going through but let the love you have for him and he has for you carry you through. He doesn't want you to be sad he wants to to celebrate the times you had together. He wants what is best for you, I know that.
 
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MikeAW2010

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Marshmallow has seemingly become more and more recluse. He does sleep with me at night and I let him in my office when I’m studying or working but I’m concerned he misses Ginger more than I initially thought. My mom came by a week ago and she had a duffel bag Ginger used to lay on while she was crashing with me. Marshmallow instantly picked up the scent and began rubbing himself on it and laying on it and we generally couldn’t get him off of it. It’s still a shock to me as well. It was just supposed to be an ordinary vet visit, or atleast that was what I intended. I had no idea that day I would be returning without him. Just the memories of shuffling him into the kennel and taking him to the vet while Ginger was crying in the kennel having no idea what was about to come to past (and I didn’t either) ... didn’t get much in the way of saying good bye or even holding him one more time ...

anyway here is Marshmallow...


98DC1536-33FF-4FA2-B751-07BECA9AB6C4.jpeg
57D0A54E-3E56-43BD-831B-FA3D03231EAD.jpeg
EDDCD8AB-2C2E-444E-B6A2-82784DDA6E40.jpeg
DF6EFB3D-80C8-4C14-8715-A9441E9F4263.jpeg
 

calicosrspecial

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Marshmallow has seemingly become more and more recluse. He does sleep with me at night and I let him in my office when I’m studying or working but I’m concerned he misses Ginger more than I initially thought. My mom came by a week ago and she had a duffel bag Ginger used to lay on while she was crashing with me. Marshmallow instantly picked up the scent and began rubbing himself on it and laying on it and we generally couldn’t get him off of it. It’s still a shock to me as well. It was just supposed to be an ordinary vet visit, or atleast that was what I intended. I had no idea that day I would be returning without him. Just the memories of shuffling him into the kennel and taking him to the vet while Ginger was crying in the kennel having no idea what was about to come to past (and I didn’t either) ... didn’t get much in the way of saying good bye or even holding him one more time ...

anyway here is Marshmallow...


View attachment 375247View attachment 375248View attachment 375249View attachment 375250
Marshmallow is gorgeous!!!

"Marshmallow has seemingly become more and more recluse. He does sleep with me at night and I let him in my office when I’m studying or working but I’m concerned he misses Ginger more than I initially thought." - Yes, he is mourning. It happens all the time. :/ Just keep giving him that love and attention and do your best. It is great you are sleeping with him and hanging out with him. And just sit and give some love. It is hard for them to lose their loved ones. :(

"My mom came by a week ago and she had a duffel bag Ginger used to lay on while she was crashing with me. Marshmallow instantly picked up the scent and began rubbing himself on it and laying on it and we generally couldn’t get him off of it." - :( That is so sad but sweet at the same time. He misses his brother. :(

" It’s still a shock to me as well. It was just supposed to be an ordinary vet visit, or atleast that was what I intended. I had no idea that day I would be returning without him. Just the memories of shuffling him into the kennel and taking him to the vet while Ginger was crying in the kennel having no idea what was about to come to past (and I didn’t either) ... didn’t get much in the way of saying good bye or even holding him one more time ..." - I know. It is awful. The shock and the pain of that tends to overtake our minds over all the good times we have (because it is so shocking and traumatizing). I try to focus on the good times to help ease the pain of those last moments. It isn't easy and there is a lot of back and forth but it is best to try. It is hard but you should be proud of the life you gave Ginger and should celebrate that bond and love. I am proud of you for that.

"anyway here is Marshmallow... " - He is gorgeous. Love him twice as much to try to fill the void from Ginger for him. He needs you very much now.

Hang in there and please do not beat yourself up. We have to make difficult decisions and though we do not like to make them we have to. And to do what is best is done from love. Ginger does not want you to be sad and feeling badly. He wants you to celebrate the life you two had together.
 

calicosrspecial

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Marshmallow has seemingly become more and more recluse. He does sleep with me at night and I let him in my office when I’m studying or working but I’m concerned he misses Ginger more than I initially thought. My mom came by a week ago and she had a duffel bag Ginger used to lay on while she was crashing with me. Marshmallow instantly picked up the scent and began rubbing himself on it and laying on it and we generally couldn’t get him off of it. It’s still a shock to me as well. It was just supposed to be an ordinary vet visit, or atleast that was what I intended. I had no idea that day I would be returning without him. Just the memories of shuffling him into the kennel and taking him to the vet while Ginger was crying in the kennel having no idea what was about to come to past (and I didn’t either) ... didn’t get much in the way of saying good bye or even holding him one more time ...

anyway here is Marshmallow...


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How are things going? Just wanted to check in. Hope all is well.
 
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MikeAW2010

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How are things going? Just wanted to check in. Hope all is well.
Been super busy. When I got laid off from my job last year due to Covid I became financially wrecked so I'm working two jobs right now trying to catch back up but unfortunately I get absolutely no free time these days. Hoping this ends soon because its taking a major toll on my stamina.

So.. I picked up a new family member named Lana. She is a Savannah Cat about 6 months old. A neighbor gave her to me because she found her abandoned. My neighbor believes Lana was bred by a breeder but because of her size (she's tiny, especially for a Savannah cat. She's smaller than all of my cats.) they realized they wouldn't make a profit off of her and abandoned her. I bought her a new cat-tree and she is taking heavily to it. I'm working on her permits, vaccinations. She is super tiny though and we have coyote problems. I really don't want to keep her outdoors.

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Sandy is more affectionate to me than most of my cats except Baxter. She rubs her face on my face and hands when I'm laying down and sometimes she will even lay against me.. I can pick her up now to move her if I need to.

Baxter.. ..has been doing something pretty interesting as of late. When I'm laying down he will jump on my back and knead his paws on my spine and literally.. ..give me a back massage. A few months ago I was lifting heavy equipment and overstrained my left arm incurring Tendonitis. I haven't had time to go to physical therapy due to two jobs but Baxter will literally knead my left arm while I am laying down and it actually helps with the pain. I can't help but wonder if he knows my arm is in pain or not.

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Talien

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I don't know what it is about this site, but I keep having threads I follow stop giving me notifications. The last time I got one from your thread was around page 7 so I had a lot to catch up on. Seeing how far Panda and Sandy have come is amazing, I knew they would come around eventually but I didn't expect such a profound transformation in Sandy. You worked a miracle with her, especially knowing that she had been mistreated by people in the past.

I'm sorry to hear about what happened to Rabbit, and I know it's probably no comfort but karma really does have a way of destroying people like that. She harmed an innocent just to spite you, and that will come back to her in spades.

You will feel Ginger's loss for a long time to come, especially since it was so sudden. Marshmallow will as well so you'll have to be more patient with him. It sounds like him and Sandy had a confrontational relationship to begin with so that is probably why he is lashing out at her more now, he is in pain and grieving in his own way and it's likely he sees her as a way to vent his own frustrations.

I saved his life when he was a kitten and he had so much trust in me and then suddenly just... abruptly... I took his life away.
No, you did not take his life away. You took his pain, his suffering away. You gave him peace.
 

calicosrspecial

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Been super busy. When I got laid off from my job last year due to Covid I became financially wrecked so I'm working two jobs right now trying to catch back up but unfortunately I get absolutely no free time these days. Hoping this ends soon because its taking a major toll on my stamina.

So.. I picked up a new family member named Lana. She is a Savannah Cat about 6 months old. A neighbor gave her to me because she found her abandoned. My neighbor believes Lana was bred by a breeder but because of her size (she's tiny, especially for a Savannah cat. She's smaller than all of my cats.) they realized they wouldn't make a profit off of her and abandoned her. I bought her a new cat-tree and she is taking heavily to it. I'm working on her permits, vaccinations. She is super tiny though and we have coyote problems. I really don't want to keep her outdoors.

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Sandy is more affectionate to me than most of my cats except Baxter. She rubs her face on my face and hands when I'm laying down and sometimes she will even lay against me.. I can pick her up now to move her if I need to.

Baxter.. ..has been doing something pretty interesting as of late. When I'm laying down he will jump on my back and knead his paws on my spine and literally.. ..give me a back massage. A few months ago I was lifting heavy equipment and overstrained my left arm incurring Tendonitis. I haven't had time to go to physical therapy due to two jobs but Baxter will literally knead my left arm while I am laying down and it actually helps with the pain. I can't help but wonder if he knows my arm is in pain or not.

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"Been super busy. When I got laid off from my job last year due to Covid I became financially wrecked so I'm working two jobs right now trying to catch back up but unfortunately I get absolutely no free time these days. Hoping this ends soon because its taking a major toll on my stamina." - Good for you for working hard and getting back on your feet. I never doubted that you could achieve anything you want. Great job!! I know it is hard but hopefully when things get back to normal you can slow down a bit.

"So.. I picked up a new family member named Lana. She is a Savannah Cat about 6 months old. A neighbor gave her to me because she found her abandoned. My neighbor believes Lana was bred by a breeder but because of her size (she's tiny, especially for a Savannah cat. She's smaller than all of my cats.) they realized they wouldn't make a profit off of her and abandoned her. I bought her a new cat-tree and she is taking heavily to it. I'm working on her permits, vaccinations. She is super tiny though and we have coyote problems. I really don't want to keep her outdoors. " - Oh my. It makes me sick people do that to cats. Thank goodness for people like you. Savannah's are tough for a few reasons. No, you don't want her outdoors but indoors is a challenge. Can you find a rescue (no kill)? There are people that love Savannahs so she should find a home.

She has really taken to Baxter and Baxter has taken to her!!! WOW!!!

Those pictures are amazing!!! Baxter is such a sweetie!!!

"Sandy is more affectionate to me than most of my cats except Baxter. She rubs her face on my face and hands when I'm laying down and sometimes she will even lay against me.. I can pick her up now to move her if I need to." - FANTASTIC!!!! It is amazing how they respond to LOVE.

"Baxter.. ..has been doing something pretty interesting as of late. When I'm laying down he will jump on my back and knead his paws on my spine and literally.. ..give me a back massage. " - They will do that.

"A few months ago I was lifting heavy equipment and overstrained my left arm incurring Tendonitis. I haven't had time to go to physical therapy due to two jobs but Baxter will literally knead my left arm while I am laying down and it actually helps with the pain. I can't help but wonder if he knows my arm is in pain or not." - WOW!!! I think he may sense something is reason. Cats are intuitive and do know things. I thought he was just doing that because they are cats but knowing you have an injury suggests he may sense something.

Hang in there. Hard work and good people are eventually rewarded. I know you will be!!!

Great to hear from you and I am so happy things are going well!!! You deserve it!!

Talien - I know. Same thing happens to me. I follow a thread and don't get updates so I never know it continues. And my memory isn't so good nowadays so I forget so I really rely on those updates. Also, I agree with everything you posted!!!
 
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