Toilet habits

[Kayamarie]

I moved back into my mums with my cat bella a year ago and she’s very on and off with deciding when she poops in her litter tray or not. It’s a 50/50 chance that she will either take the litter tray or the stairs to have a poo on and it’s getting me down because I get a lot of grief from my mum and her partner. I’ve just bought her a covered litter tray yesterday and she’s ignored that straight away and did a poo on the stairs so I took the hood off the tray and popped her in it a few times and greeted her with a treat each time. It might be worth noting that my mum has banned my cat from going in my room because she’s controlling and says it’s unhygienic for my cat to be in my room where my one year old baby sleeps (even though I pay her £400 a month)
anyway, please hit me with suggestions. I’m desperate and will try about anything.

 

[Furballsmom]

Hi! I think you are on the right track trying an additional litter tray, and you might look at different litter.

I also think your cat is stressed, see if you can find some time/a place for your cat to hear some low volume cat music such as Cat In My Arms, on spotify and elsewhere.

 

[neely]

It might be worth noting that my mum has banned my cat from going in my room because she’s controlling and says it’s unhygienic for my cat to be in my room where my one year old baby sleeps (even though I pay her £400 a month) anyway, please hit me with suggestions. I’m desperate and will try about anything.

I completely agree with Furballsmom that your cat is stressed. Therefore, this could be the reason why Bella is going outside the litter box. Here's an Article that might have some helpful information about how to solve litter box problems:
How To Solve Litterbox Problems In Cats: The Ultimate Guide – TheCatSite Articles

It might also be helpful to show your mom this Article that discusses some of the more common questions about cats and babies:
Cats And Babies: All Your Questions Answered! – TheCatSite Articles

 

[Kayamarie]

Hi! I think you are on the right track trying an additional litter tray, and you might look at different litter.

I also think your cat is stressed, see if you can find some time/a place for your cat to hear some low volume cat music such as Cat In My Arms, on spotify and elsewhere.

Thank you for replying! I didn’t know that was such a thing, cat music! That’s amazing. I’ll definitely give that a try! Thank you so much

 

[Kayamarie]

I completely agree with Furballsmom that your cat is stressed. Therefore, this could be the reason why Bella is going outside the litter box. Here's an Article that might have some helpful information about how to solve litter box problems:
How To Solve Litterbox Problems In Cats: The Ultimate Guide – TheCatSite Articles

It might also be helpful to show your mom this Article that discusses some of the more common questions about cats and babies:
Cats And Babies: All Your Questions Answered! – TheCatSite Articles

I also agree that bella is stressed. I totally understand that she is too. My mum has banished her from not only my room but her room and the living room too so she hasn’t got a great quality of life at the moment. It’s brought be to tears. It makes me feel like a terrible owner but no matter how many times I ask nicely, or scream and cry at her about it, she just stands her ground and says no way it’s her house and she’s not letting my cat in places she doesn’t want her. Bella sleeps just outside my bedroom door too poor baby. I miss her as much as she might be missing me!

 

[neely]

she just stands her ground and says no way it’s her house and she’s not letting my cat in places she doesn’t want her. Bella sleeps just outside my bedroom door too poor baby. I miss her as much as she might be missing me!

You're not a terrible owner since you want the best quality of life for Bella but right now there are obstacles that stand in your way. I don't know the configuration of your mom's house but is there somewhere you could sleep where she could be with you? Or is there someone you know who could talk to your mom on your behalf, someone else she might listen to? For the time being try to give her as much play time and affection as you possibly can. It breaks my heart too.

 

[FeebysOwner]

HI. In addition to the good advice you've been given above, please make sure to clean the stairs with an enzymatic cleaner to get rid of the smell. If Bella can smell her poo there, it is like an invitation to continue to go there. If there is a specific place she goes all the time on the stairs, you could also consider placing a puppy pee pad there after cleaning to help with future cleaning. This 'habit' has gone on long enough, it could take some time to break.

What if you were to propose to your mum that you can probably break this habit by setting up an isolated area in your bedroom so that Bella doesn't have free reign to the entire bedroom but yet can spend the night with you in there? A large crate that can house Bella, food/water dish, and litter box? If you are allowed to close your door at night, you can choose whether or not you want to go the extra step and leave the crate door ajar. Not saying I advocate for lying, but sometimes it seems like a reasonable 'compromise' in a situation like yours. I hope you are the one cleaning your room...

 

[Kayamarie]

HI. In addition to the good advice you've been given above, please make sure to clean the stairs with an enzymatic cleaner to get rid of the smell. If Bella can smell her poo there, it is like an invitation to continue to go there. If there is a specific place she goes all the time on the stairs, you could also consider placing a puppy pee pad there after cleaning to help with future cleaning. This 'habit' has gone on long enough, it could take some time to break.

What if you were to propose to your mum that you can probably break this habit by setting up an isolated area in your bedroom so that Bella doesn't have free reign to the entire bedroom but yet can spend the night with you in there? A large crate that can house Bella, food/water dish, and litter box? If you are allowed to close your door at night, you can choose whether or not you want to go the extra step and leave the crate door ajar. Not saying I advocate for lying, but sometimes it seems like a reasonable 'compromise' in a situation like yours. I hope you are the one cleaning your room...

Ooh what is an enzymatic cleaner please? I’ll definitely invest in that as I’ve heard cat’s sense of smell is something like 100x the sensitivity of ours. The amount of times I’ve scrubbed that carpet is unreal
My mother is the most stubborn woman to have ever come across and I know that makes me sound like I’m just putting her before my cat, but I had bella in my room once, she was in there for five minutes before my mum noticed and came into my room and literally picked bella up and took her out. Naturally that got my back up and I had a screaming match that got completely out of hand with my mum and yet after all of that I didn’t win. She stood her ground. It’s got me so down but I can’t find anywhere else to live. Me, my partner and my one year old pay her £400 a month and I do most house chores (including my own room) and she won’t even let me do what I want with my own cat. Toxic household alert huh. Anyway my only hope is that my partner gets some money soon as he had a road accident 3 weeks ago and broke his hip, then we’re getting the hell out of here and I can have my fur baby back
I really appreciate your reply

 

[Kayamarie]

You're not a terrible owner since you want the best quality of life for Bella but right now there are obstacles that stand in your way. I don't know the configuration of your mom's house but is there somewhere you could sleep where she could be with you? Or is there someone you know who could talk to your mom on your behalf, someone else she might listen to? For the time being try to give her as much play time and affection as you possibly can. It breaks my heart too.

Thank you, it means a lot as I beat myself up a lot of the time that I let my mother have such a hold over me even at 23 years old. And with my own child for god sakes. She has made her mind up and I or nobody else will change that and it has brought me to tears. I’ve had bella for 4 years ever since she was a baby. She is my baby I’ve been spending as much time as possible with her lately. Even though I have my baby to look after and my partner who has recently been in a road accident. I wish I could have Bella around me like I did when I didn’t live with my mum, then I would have to go into seperate rooms to do so and it wouldn’t be such a hassle with everything else I have going on

 

[FeebysOwner]

Ooh what is an enzymatic cleaner please?

Here is a link to enzymatic cleaners that will at least explain how they work. Perhaps, one or more of them are available to you to order online?
5 Best Enzymatic Cleaners - Jan. 2021 - BestReviews

 

[Kayamarie]

That’s awesome. I’ve just ordered some from Amazon! Maybe if it stops bella from going poo on the stairs my mum won’t be so against her and I’ll have a chance at letting her in my room. By any chance do you know of the best brush or way that will get rid of excess hair? That’s another one of my mums issues with Bella. If I can keep on top of it and there’s less hair about the place then that will help my case also. Thank you

 

[susanm9006]

That’s awesome. I’ve just ordered some from Amazon! Maybe if it stops bella from going poo on the stairs my mum won’t be so against her and I’ll have a chance at letting her in my room. By any chance do you know of the best brush or way that will get rid of excess hair? That’s another one of my mums issues with Bella. If I can keep on top of it and there’s less hair about the place then that will help my case also. Thank you

Try a Furminator. A little expensive but works really great at reducing shedding

 

[FeebysOwner]

By any chance do you know of the best brush or way that will get rid of excess hair?

Or, if you don't like the Furminator, as mentioned above, you can try a simple metal brush like I use (see attached pic). There are a ton of different ones on the market (and Amazon), and all kinds of different ones are used by members on this site. You might just have to try a few to find one you - and, Bella - like.

 

[wily1]

Try a Furminator. A little expensive but works really great at reducing shedding

I agree about the furminator....first time I used it I got a literal handful of hair off of Tim.....also noticed a lot less hair on my clothes etc lately