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Thinking About Adopting Sylvester's Sister, Part Ii

Discussion in 'The Cat's Meow' started by les26, Nov 7, 2018.

  1. les26

    les26 Thread Starter Sylvester's daddy Super Cat

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    Awhile back I posted how we were thinking of getting Sylvester's sister Charlotte out of the house from the same woman that took Sylvester in, she (the cat) is not very social but it also is a very small row home, the woman seems to be a hoarder, I was never in her house but looked in 1 time and all I saw were boxes of stuff and she said "I have a problem", the cat lives with Rains who is her and Sylvester's father cat, and another cat Milo. I did see the two males and they were in very good shape, but she said Charlotte doesn't come out much, isn't as friendly as Sylvester is, and we were wondering months ago if we should take her too, but then all hell broke loose when Sugar almost died from that terrible allergic reaction to anesthesia months ago so this was put on the back burner, but I talked to Virginia the other day and she told me that "the grey cat" she took in after I took Sylvester died, and her daughter had moved out and a cat showed up but her landlord said they couldn't keep it so she gave it to Virginia, she took it to Peaceable Kingdom a local shelter to have it checked out but 2 days later they called and told her it died but wouldn't tell her from what? I wonder since it was a Persian and was declawed it was someone's cat if someone there decided to keep it but that is not the point, the point is she has cats that have fleas and worms, is trying to help them but doesn't have the means to do so properly and said " I don't want to call you and tell you Charlotte died too", so this is very upsetting to me, she has a heart of gold and takes these cats in, without her I would have never gotten Sylvester, but she really has to get a handle on these issues or they will get sick and die, I feel like I wish I could help with money but hesitate to start that, I did tell her to call and make arrangements to take her to No Nonsense neutering, she is not spayed so that is part of the problem too, I called today and left a message asking if she did that as I hadn't talked to her in about 10 days, I hope that she did so they also could deworm her and treat the fleas. Deb and I talked about if we should take her in or not, it would be a BIG project to get her accustomed to us here, she would probably hide for months but like Deb said "it still would be better than where she's at", but Deb also said what if she is already weakend (her heart) from the worms, what if we would take her and spend much money on her and she would die on us? We also are expecting some new furniture next month, and you know when a new one comes in they pee all over the place until they get used to each other, and on top of this Deb's 85 year old father is dealing with some health issues that are not quite clear what they are yet so now is not the best time to try to pull this off....

    So there you have it, part II....I think since it is my baby boy's little sister I feel more for her, plus I am wondering if by telling me this it was Virginia's backwards way of asking for help? She has said "I wouldn't give her to anyone but you", so I don't know. Again, she means well by taking them off the streets of Allentown, PA., but can't by her own admission take care of them properly and I do understand. I and Deb, but mostly me, am going back and forth with this for the above reasons, please feel free to weigh in with your thoughts.

    Thank you,

    Les
     
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  2. Furballsmom

    Furballsmom TCS Member Top Cat

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    Hi!
    If it were me, I'd get that kitty out of that situation :redheartpump:
    There will always be situations that happen (such as new furniture, or more importantly, ill health) that make a person say "maybe not" but yet on the other hand, an opportunity to help a cat is a golden, wonderful thing.
     
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  3. les26

    les26 Thread Starter Sylvester's daddy Super Cat

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    Virginia left me a phone message and said that she tried a few times to catch her but couldn't, I don't know why her son doesn't help her I'm sure the two of them would be able to catch her, but she says that she is afraid of her now and is "losing fur" thanks to the fleas so it is like it was with Sylvester all over again, I'll never forget how I had tears in my eyes at the vet when I saw the shape that he was in.....I feel badly for this cat, I don't know what to do, should I try to get one of the women that helped us with TNR go in and net her and take her to a vet and get her checked out? I would go in and get her but she said they are so loaded with fleas I can't do that and bring that home! I am also concerned about how her health is if she has worms plus the fleas, could she already be in a weakened state, could she be beyond help? How long can a cat deal with these things before it does them in? Again, we have pressing issues at home, especially worrying about Deb's dad, her mom told her a few hours ago they went to the doctor and he could hardly walk today, he needed a wheelchair, and said he got worse since the other day when we saw him which is not good and they still don't exactly know what is wrong with him, so taking this on now might not be a good idea to bring more stress upon ourselves.....

    Like Christopher Robbin said in the latest movie "what to do, what to do?" to which Pooh replied "what to do indeed?".....

    I really have to think on this, I feel badly for the cat, and being Sylvester's sister and all...I wonder if they would even know each other after almost 3 years apart?
     

  4. Furballsmom

    Furballsmom TCS Member Top Cat

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    I'm too much of an action type person, I'd be in there, out and off to the vet :)
     
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  5. Antonio65

    Antonio65 TCS Member Top Cat

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    Due to my recent experience, one of my first concerns would be if Charlotte and Sylvester get along.
    I mean, being siblings doesn't mean that they recognize each other, and they could even fight or not tolerate each other.

    Of course Charlotte needs an intervention to save her from a situation that smells like neglect, although with all the good intentions from that woman. It is clear, by what you say, that the poor girl is not living fine in there. She needs a place of her own, with the proper care, with enough means to give her what she needs and deserves.
    The woman has you in mind, and I think she's trying to send you a "subliminal" message. It is something that I did before, and I have to admit that it worked fine :)

    This said, I think that your heart might lead you to consider taking her in with you. You know Sylvester and can imagine how he could react.
    As I said previously, from my recent experience I would fear having two adult cats in the same house without a proper introduction.

    Anyway, I would take her, at the moment it is the only way to give her a decent life.
     
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  6. di and bob

    di and bob TCS Member Top Cat

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    No, they would not remember each other at all.....I have had mama cats not recognize their own babies when a few months go by. But being genetically tied together they may be predispositioned to more easily get along. Since she is in such bad shape, and knowing you, :) , I would urge you to get her and help her, even if things don't work out, you would be in a much better position to rehome her.
    There will ALWAYS be something that comes up. There always is, that is just life. you are worried about her health, both physically and mentally, but even if something does develop that you couldn't devote much time to her, where is she now? She is hiding. She will be hiding at your place. At least she will be flea free, worm free, and have food and a nice place to sleep. If she doesn't survive from her neglect, she will at least know what love and care is at the end. I think you will always have regret if you don't help her. Even if you end up rehoming her, I know you will find her a wonderful forever home. I say don't let another minute go by, this poor, undersocialized, underloved girl needs you. Just do it!


    I'm so sorry about your father in law.....we went through pretty much the same thing with my own father three years ago. It was so sudden and dramatic, but started out as him losing interest in the things he used to love and then physically deteriorating. It turned out to be small strokes that ended with a big one. He was on coumadin for leg clots too! i know how painful it is to not know what is happening and see them deteriorate like that. He was 85 too. I'll definitely pray for your family to get through this and for him to find strength and health again, God willing. May God find it in his mercy to watch over and help you all!

    PS Not all cats pee on furniture when it is stressful for them, even new furniture. I only had two cats that did that out of twenty or so.
     
    Last edited: Nov 8, 2018
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  7. les26

    les26 Thread Starter Sylvester's daddy Super Cat

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    Thank you all for your replies, it is a very tough situation with not an easy answer. I told Deb about it last night at bedtime and she said she feels like going over there right now and getting her but also said "I just can't deal with any more stress, with my Dad and all I feel like I will explode now" so I don't want to put any extra stress on her either and have something bad happen to her, but we feel so badly for this cat! I am going to call Virginia and ask her what happened to the original "plan" we talked about from about 10 days ago, to have her son and daughter there and help catch her and take her to Non Nonsense neutering to get her spayed and taken care of? She said nothing about that in her message? And I also have thought about going in and trying to catch her but that place must be so overloaded with fleas it isn't funny, and I can't bring that home here with 9 cats?! So I don't know what the answer is but we are praying on it and dealing with it along with the other immediate issues like her father, and in a few hours Deb will be having her first colonoscopy so we are a bit distracted right now, but I definitely will stay on it. And she also said "it's too bad we don't know someone looking for a cat, someone who would be quiet and patient and work with her".

    I said "I wish I could wave a magic wand and all would be fine", but I know that isn't going to happen, but like the math teacher said on the "Wonder Years" tv show many years ago "every problem contains it's own solution" so the answer is in there somewhere!

    Thank you for taking time to comment, this is a tough one for us right now.....
     
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  8. Furballsmom

    Furballsmom TCS Member Top Cat

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    Bless your hearts-I have something going now also where I thought the same thing, that one of those magic wands would be SO helpful!!
    I'm sending you all EVERY good thought and my prayers that the cat(s) and health and stress and the holidays all find a positive outcome, and a level balance.
    Try @Mamanyt1953 's chamomile tea in addition to your holy basil :)
     
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  9. Antonio65

    Antonio65 TCS Member Top Cat

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    :grouphug:
     
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  10. Antonio65

    Antonio65 TCS Member Top Cat

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    :vibes::vibes::vibes:
     
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  11. les26

    les26 Thread Starter Sylvester's daddy Super Cat

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    Well Deb made it through the colonoscopy just fine, a little touch of Diverticulosis and a few internal hemmoroids but no polyps so that is good news Praise God....then we come home to a message from her mother saying the doctor called and said to get over to the emergency room right away, they are "very upset" because her father's blood levels dropped so low and they checked his stool for blood and he had some dark black in it, and his mother died from stomach cancer so of course now our minds are racing all over the place. They most likely will admit him and maybe hopefully FINALLY get to the root of what is going wrong with him, but it is so very upsetting and stressful....so you see now is definitely not the time for us to take another kitty in and that in itself upsets me, I have to try to get her help at least even if we don't take her in. Ugh.....

    Thanks for the kind words and well wishes and I will keep you posted!
     
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  12. Furballsmom

    Furballsmom TCS Member Top Cat

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    :vibes::alright: :grouphug:
     
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  13. Mamanyt1953

    Mamanyt1953 Rules my home with an iron paw Staff Member Forum Helper

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    I'm with @furball's mom...grab that cat! We have several very good articles about introducing cats, what to do if the introduction fails, and dealing with pee issues! Yes, she could "up and die on you," but it sounds very much as if this girl isn't going to make it without you.

    Have a cup of chamomile tea, keep some on hand for anxious pussycats, and do what you've been wanting to do deep down inside for a long time now. Jes' sayin'
     
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  14. les26

    les26 Thread Starter Sylvester's daddy Super Cat

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    Oh believe me I want to, but read my post above #11, we have some pretty serious issues going on with her 85 year old father so we aren't in position right now for more added stress, I can't see something go wrong with Deb's health over all this. But I did just email a woman who helped us TNR a bunch of them years ago, and most of them are inside with us now as we took them in eventually, and I explained the issues with her and maybe since she has experience with these things she might see something that I don't. But yes, I and even Deb would like to just go get her now, but things aren't allowing it right now, we don't know if this is the end for her father or just a huge bump in the road, so I can't push this right now, but I am going to at least try to get her some help even if she has to stay there with them.

    Ugh.....
     
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  15. Mamanyt1953

    Mamanyt1953 Rules my home with an iron paw Staff Member Forum Helper

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    Bless you. It's a hard one, isn't it?
     
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  16. les26

    les26 Thread Starter Sylvester's daddy Super Cat

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    We just got back from visiting her father in the hospital, and they learned that he has lung cancer and also is bleeding internally so they are giving him blood and are going to scope his stomach tomorrow and take a biopsy of the tumors and see how to treat it. While it isn't what we wanted to hear it is at least getting to the root of why he has been having all these issues the last 3 months, and he seemed relieved to know what it is and is in good spirits but that is how he's ALWAYS been, always upbeat and jolly, so we are hoping that will carry him through the upcoming procedures.

    And Virginia called and left a message in response to my message earlier today, told me "thank you for caring", that they "haven't given up and want to catch her and take her" but they are just spinning their wheels over there, so I will try to keep on top of that while dealing with all of this. We will see what happens but right now is definitely NOT a good time to try to bring a new cat in to our fold!!
     
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  17. Furballsmom

    Furballsmom TCS Member Top Cat

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    Wow. All my thoughts are with you-all!!
     
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  18. Antonio65

    Antonio65 TCS Member Top Cat

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    @les26,
    My thoughts and prayers are with you!
    Definitely not a good moment for you to take a new cat in your house.

    But, allow me to say, Charlotte is still in need and she can't go on living in that house like she's living now any longer.
    So my humble opinion would be if you can find a kind foster home for the period you are unable to take her in, just to take that poor girl out of what sounds like a very uncomfortable situation.
    Do you have a dear friend or a relative or a neighbor or a person that can do you a favor?
    They will have your reassurance that it is a temporary solution for what sounds like an emergency on all sides.
     
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  19. les26

    les26 Thread Starter Sylvester's daddy Super Cat

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    Yes I also mentioned that to the person who helped us catch our cats years ago, she said they are overrun with cats at the shelter as always but someone who wants a cat and who would be quiet and patient with her would be great. Virginia said on her message "I want to keep her but need to get her taken care of" which in her situation isn't the best thing but I will keep trying to solve this issue!

    Thank you all!!
     
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  20. Furballsmom

    Furballsmom TCS Member Top Cat

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    :hangin: hang in there!
     
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