The "what's On Your Mind?" Thread -2021

[MoochNNoodles]

I could use a little advice.

DS's birthday is coming up and I was thinking of texting MIL to see if she wants suggestions for presents. Normally around the holidays she will ask me to do that and give me a "per kid" budget (I often chose things under). DD's birthday is not too long after the holidays so she asks for an idea for he birthday at the same time and has both shipped to me to wrap.

DH said not to text her in case they are on a budget right now. The thing is...it's been a while since she gave DS something for his birthday. But she always remembers DD!

It started about 5 years ago. DH's oldest sister was hospitalized in late April and ended up passing in early June. That year she had been texting with me about getting him a fire truck and then when things got so crazy with SIL it never happened. I wasn't offended of course. I never said another thing because we were all grieving. But since then; his birthday has been forgotten more often than not. And hes old enough to notice now that DD gets a birthday gift from Grandma but he doesn't. I really do not think it's intentional. She's a very sweet person. I imagine this time of year is still hard. Almost a year later my nephew was killed in a car accident and I know how that still gets me!!

So how would you handle it? We used to e-mail and then instant message several times a week but that stopped as my kids got into school years. She is on Facebook so DH suggested posting something and tagging family but tagging seems worse than just asking her privately and casually. I really don't like the idea of kids asking for or expecting gifts... But being treated differently will deffinitely be noticed! And resented.

I do think losing her oldest changed her. I'm not sure DH sees it though. But even if it's unintentionally hurting DS he's not going to understand.

 

[Lari]

We bought a house last November, interest rates are super low right now. It’s our first home, and we cobbled together the down payment by raiding savings, borrowing from my 401k, husband borrowing from a life insurance policy and me selling a mutual fund started back in high school. With all that our mortgage is roughly the same as the rent we were paying. Rent in some areas is so high that sometimes it makes sense to buy.

We really benefited from the low interest rates when we bought last year as well! And I think our mortgage rate they gave us was slightly less than we were paying for rent in our last apartment, so I believe we're paying what our rent was so we could finish a bit early.

MoochNNoodles I would bring it up to her. Even if she's not meaning to show favoritism, it'll come across that way to your kids. In her place, I would be super embarrassed to be told that, but I'd feel terrible for ds and do whatever I needed to remember (write notes or alarms).

 

[susanm9006]

My first maskless dinner party coming up in a couple hours. I must say the benefit of masks that we don’t think of is that it hides all those stray chin hairs. A little tidying up required before I can be seen mask free.

 

[Margret]

We tried feeding them warm oatmeal last night but they didn’t eat very much. They likely aren’t used to warm gooey oats.

They don't actually have to be gooey to be warm, you know. Put them in a pot on the stove, with no water, set the burner on Low, and stir constantly to prevent burning. Without water the oats won't hold onto the heat too long, but every little bit helps.

The chickens might also benefit from a few rice socks radiating heat in the coop.

And now I"m having issues with the SSA office. What the heck? Why always just me

It isn't just you. I've lost my Medicare because last year when my husband sent them a check to cover both of us they applied it only to him, cashed the check, and have been sitting on the $1300 surplus. And now they want me to jump through hoops to get reinstated.

Margret

 

[KarenKat]

My first maskless dinner party coming up in a couple hours. I must say the benefit of masks that we don’t think of is that it hides all those stray chin hairs. A little tidying up required before I can be seen mask free.

How exciting though, must be nice to breath an actual sigh of relief and enjoy some important time with friends or family

 

[muffy]

RIP Walter Mondale: Walter Mondale, former vice president, dies at 93

Margret

Mr. 13 electoral votes.

I was sorry to near that. He was a good man.

 

[WillowMarie]

Not sure exactly how much bigger they get, but I don’t think they are full sized yet. They should get to 8-10 lbs at full size and they might be about 2/3 of that size now? They are definitely one of the bigger breeds

What a cutie!!! Thanks for sharing the picture!

I could use a little advice.

I would be open about it and let her know she either has to gift them both or not gift either, whatever her choice. Agree that children notice these things and it can hurt. Maybe she doesn't realize what she is doing or the consequences, but I would for sure lay out this boundary very straight forward so there is no room for misinterpretation. It may feel awkward to bring up, but better in the long run than one seeing favoritism and being emotionally affected by it long term. Glad you were able to notice and can imagine the impact it can cause. Your family is lucky to have you. <3

A little tidying up required before I can be seen mask free.

Oh, yes, those pesky little hairs. Feels like they get thicker with age and hurt much more plucking them out this past year. Does pandemic stress thicken hair...?

 

[susanm9006]

How exciting though, must be nice to breath an actual sigh of relief and enjoy some important time with friends or family

Yes, thank you it is. A year with hugging my son is way too long.

 

[Margret]

Oh, yes, those pesky little hairs. Feels like they get thicker with age and hurt much more plucking them out this past year. Does pandemic stress thicken hair...?

I got fed up with plucking several years ago. I bought the cheapest women's electric razor I could find and use it regularly. (It may be meant for legs, but it works just fine on my chin and throat.) If it starts to hurt it means it's time to change the batteries.

Margret

 

[Mamanyt1953]

DH said not to text her in case they are on a budget right now.

You could text her with several suggestions that would fit most any budget, and the gift card idea is excellent. Even a bit of cash in a card! Some people think that cash is "too impersonal," but the younger kids on my gift list would rather get a $5 bill than a $20 gift! God help me when they outgrow that age!

 

[strider rose]

the weather is very chilly here and so i may have to bundle up for my appt later

 

[MoonstoneWolf]

How is it that my Mom thinks a Wyze Cam V3 minus a spotlight is shining a light 10 feet up from the ground into her bedroom window. She's on verge of busting each one and even called the police on me for spying on wildlife. She's lost her mind and not getting help from Alz dot org because of the visiting doctor situation (her not me). I have reached the end of my rope with this woman. The least her nephews and nieces can do is help out since she helped with them when they were young. I'm getting fed up with my life. I really am. I must have been the most horrible living being in a past life because I am paying for it now.

 

[MoonstoneWolf]

It makes it easier for management, not customers. This way, every complaint report can be settled by copy/pasting "suspended delivery to this neighborhood".

But like I said, they do have to make your mail available somehow. Here's the PO locator, if you click on your local branch it should have the current phone number underneath the 1-800 number: PO Locator | USPS

I tried calling the "current number" yesterday before the Post Office closed. The current one that is located from the site you provided. The phone is disconnected. I'm sorry. I don't know what to do but we now are on verge of having utilities shut off as a result of this. I don't understand why USPS just ignores this situation. There's a lot of people (me included) who do not pay electronically as people steal from you that way. I really am still not in the best of health to get in my car and drive down there to find out what's going on. And now I have the irate crazy woman here to deal with and on phone with Alz org and SSA about other issues so this just gets worse by the minute.

On phone now with SSA. They sent documents that obviously were lost at my local post office so therefore tough luck on me. I will never ever be able to collect SSA as a result. This is just absolutely horrible and I'm crying.

 

[susanm9006]

I tried calling the "current number" yesterday before the Post Office closed. The current one that is located from the site you provided. The phone is disconnected. I'm sorry. I don't know what to do but we now are on verge of having utilities shut off as a result of this. I don't understand why USPS just ignores this situation. There's a lot of people (me included) who do not pay electronically as people steal from you that way. I really am still not in the best of health to get in my car and drive down there to find out what's going on. And now I have the irate crazy woman here to deal with and on phone with Alz org and SSA about other issues so this just gets worse by the minute.

Do you have mail Informed delivery? If so there is a link at the bottom to report missing mail. Click it every day and report your mail that hasn’t been delivered. A read person does read those reports so you will get someone’s attention.

 

[MoonstoneWolf]

Do you have mail Informed delivery? If so there is a link at the bottom to report missing mail. Click it every day and report your mail that hasn’t been delivered. A read person does read those reports so you will get someone’s attention.

Yes I do. And I've been reporting that at the bottom every day and nothing is being done. SSA states that I have to sign the documents within 30 days or I have to start the process over again. I need my medicare and a doctor. I may have a serious illness here that will need medicare as I don't have money or insurance.

Going round and round with both USPS and SSA. SSA insists on sending documents through us mail and yet I'm not getting delivery. I'm not sure what other options I have. I guess it's tough luck on me, I wind up in nursing home and Mom in assisted living. Hope I have better luck finding someone to take over the care of these cats but I sadly have no more faith and trust in anyone as a result of all of this.

 

[MoonstoneWolf]

Update, just called the Main Post Office in St. Louis. Told them what happened and was told "That's not our problem" Excuse me? You are USPS aren't you? Isn't it your job to ensure people get their mail. Unbelievable.

 

[WillowMarie]

I got fed up with plucking several years ago. I bought the cheapest women's electric razor I could find and use it regularly. (It may be meant for legs, but it works just fine on my chin and throat.) If it starts to hurt it means it's time to change the batteries.

I've been hesitant to try that. Worried when it was growing back it would be different than if I plucked. Plus, I like how when plucked it takes more time before I have to mess with spending time on touch ups. Glad the electric razor works well for you.

 

[Katie M]

Cleaning out my closet-there's less stuff in there now, but it somehow looks worse. It's like a mini-Hoarders episode.

 

[Margret]

I've been hesitant to try that. Worried when it was growing back it would be different than if I plucked. Plus, I like how when plucked it takes more time before I have to mess with spending time on touch ups. Glad the electric razor works well for you.

Yes, by pulling out the root plucking changes how the hair grows back, and shaving doesn't. But shaving doesn't cause the hairs you've been plucking to somehow revert to normal.

Yes, plucking lasts longer. But unless you do them all at once it doesn't seem to make much difference — I found myself needing to pluck continually. I'm putting less time and effort into shaving, and a lot less pain. But we each have our own preferences, so whatever works for you.

Margret

 

[Margret]

Update, just called the Main Post Office in St. Louis. Told them what happened and was told "That's not our problem" Excuse me? You are USPS aren't you? Isn't it your job to ensure people get their mail. Unbelievable.

Did you ask them for the correct number to call?

Margret