The "what's On Your Mind?" Thread -2019

[Graceful-Lily]

Thank you everyone for your kind words and support. I didn't mean to take over the thread with this. The auditions for the role of Graceful-Lily's significant other are still open and the director/writer will continue to take anyone who's willing to audition for the lead role. The show must go on!

 

[Mia6]

he show must go on!

Indeed, love you brave girl!!

 

[GaryT]

I'll just tell you in detail what happened so that it's better understood.

Okay, so I had called him back Wednesday afternoon but he didn't pick up (was at work). I left a voicemail. He called me back in the evening. He said the letter was "cute". He called me a sweetheart and told me that I'm a very nice person. We talked for a bit. He asked me about school and seemed interested in my program. Then, he said I should "definitely" come by to say 'Hello' and so that he can thank me in person. He said I should whenever I'm free within the next week or "even tomorrow" (that being the Thursday I went to see him). He told me what time he would be finished.

I wasn't sure at first but my best friend encouraged me to go. So, I texted him earlier in the day on Thursday to let him know that I'd be coming and he said it was fine. I got there and he was still working. It was very awkward because I know his shift was almost done but he continued to pack even while we talked and it was super distracting. He thanked me for the card and told me he'd be keeping it for a while because it meant a lot to him. He hugged me pretty tight. I was going to pull back but he held on for longer than I expected. He checked his phone mid conversation and just continued to work. Eventually, he says, "I gotta finish up here. See you around." I walk off because he just didn't look at me again after he said this. And I did make sure to go when he was almost finish work because I thought he wanted to sit and talk to me. I was wrong.

I went back to school to study and I get a text from him saying that he's sorry we couldn't talk more. Blah blah blah. He told me that the world needs more people like me and whatever (he said this multiple times).

That's when I texted him back and I said, "After all these years of saying nothing, it would be silly to not continue talking." Because the text he sent felt very cut and dry almost like a "nice knowing you okay bye". I said "after all these years of saying nothing" because I told him that I've always gone to the store and I noticed him but was just too shy to say anything to him.

That's when he sent this long text about having a busy schedule and his own endeavors in life to follow as well as his ex-girlfriend wanting to get back with him and him wanting to give the relationship another try. And not wanting to lead me on. He ended that text with a "Merry Christmas and happy new year!!" So I just say, "Same to you." And that was it.

I hope this clears everything up. Sorry, I should have explained better but my head was all over the place.

I can understand where you are coming from. Been there. I was married for almost 20 years. Ex wanted kids but just couldn't seem to carry. She had several miscarriages and gave up (started drinking). She shopped for a doc who would perform a complete historectomy at her young age (she was determined). Then, I was diagnosed with PKD and taken out of work. Moved back to my home state where I had bought land. We started building home. Her drinking got bad and one day she decided that since she can't have kids, she didn't need me anymore. Took a LOT of money with her (being together for almost 20 years gave her half). I now sit alone in an unfinished house but, at least I still have the house and it's paid for. My cat keeps me good company. He is my anchor.

I now steer clear of ANY relationship. I have friends, my cat, and my music. I am almost 64 with health issues so, I ain't anything to brag about. I really do not feel alone most of the time. After my experience, I am fearful of letting ANYONE in too close.....

I totally understand.

 

[GaryT]

I dunno how many of you have had to live with or deal with an alcoholic but, it is not fun. My ex was one and I did not know it until we had been married for a few years. She was VERY good at hiding it. Once I discovered it, she kept bottle for me to monitor (never touched it) and still had her stash. I worked nights and she would steal my money while I slept and run to the corner bar. I know his because she confessed during her going thru treatment which she told them when she was done instead of them saying she was done. I tried to fix things but you can't with an alcoholic. We did last 18 years before she left and I let her go. She is 11 years my junior.

There is a song a do when I play out by John Prine titled "The Speed of the Sound of Loneliness" that fits her.

"You come home late, you come home early.
You come on BIG when you're feelin' small.
You come home straight, you come home "curly".
Sometimes you don't come home at all.

The irony here is, I never was a drinker myself.....

 

[Lari]

Graceful-Lily - when I was 18, I met a guy at a church youth group retreat. He was a year younger, and we got on really well and he had the most beautiful sapphire eyes - I swear to god they looked like gems. And I thought he was sending me signals that he was interested and we would date and I'd get my first kiss and we'd have beautiful blue eyed babies. And then when I expressed my interest, he also let me down. Maybe he didn't realize he'd been sending mixed messages, or maybe I read them wrong. Either way, I was devastated. And it kept me from trying to make moves.

Looking back, I can say it's good it didn't work out because something much better was waiting for me about fifteen years later, but I didn't think so at the time. But you're right in knowing your worth and I feel absolutely certain that there is someone out there who will see and appreciate it.

---

In other news, I basically crashed last night after a busy week with the school Christmas concert, and I'm honestly ready to go back to bed before attempting to tackle decorating this year's gingerbread house. Yes, I'm thinking a late morning nap is sounding like a good plan.

 

[Graceful-Lily]

In other news, I basically crashed last night after a busy week with the school Christmas concert, and I'm honestly ready to go back to bed before attempting to tackle decorating this year's gingerbread house. Yes, I'm thinking a late morning nap is sounding like a good plan.

Are you on break now?

I understand what you mean about wanting to sleep. School threw off my sleep schedule so much. I couldn't fall asleep last night until 3am because my brain is used to the late nights.

 

[Lari]

Are you on break now?

I understand what you mean about wanting to sleep. School threw off my sleep schedule so much. I couldn't fall asleep last night until 3am because my brain is used to the late nights.

Nope, one more week of school. But at least the Christmas concert is over!

I'm going to decorate my gingerbread house and make that apple/pumpkin/pecan pie that someone posted here a while ago. That sounds like a good way to spend the rest of my Saturday.

 

[Graceful-Lily]

I'd love to see a picture of that pie when it's done.

 

[Lari]

I'd love to see a picture of that pie when it's done.

You can only see the top pecan layer now. It's for early Christmas with my family tomorrow, so I'll try to get a side pic of the layers once it's been cut into.

 

[Alicia88]

I dunno how many of you have had to live with or deal with an alcoholic but, it is not fun. My ex was one and I did not know it until we had been married for a few years. She was VERY good at hiding it. Once I discovered it, she kept bottle for me to monitor (never touched it) and still had her stash. I worked nights and she would steal my money while I slept and run to the corner bar. I know his because she confessed during her going thru treatment which she told them when she was done instead of them saying she was done. I tried to fix things but you can't with an alcoholic. We did last 18 years before she left and I let her go. She is 11 years my junior.

There is a song a do when I play out by John Prine titled "The Speed of the Sound of Loneliness" that fits her.

"You come home late, you come home early.
You come on BIG when you're feelin' small.
You come home straight, you come home "curly".
Sometimes you don't come home at all.

The irony here is, I never was a drinker myself.....

John is an alcoholic. It almost cost us our relationship. I actually did leave. For 2 weeks. He sobered up. Hasn't touched a drop since. He was never mean or violent. Not abusive. I didn't even see it as a problem for a long time. But he couldn't control himself. He thought he could have a beer and be fine. He was - that night. Within a week, he lost control. Got a bottle of whiskey and stayed drunk for 2 or 3 days. I just couldn't deal with it anymore. Let him know it was me or the booze. I'd like to think that he made the right choice.

 

[Mia6]

I now steer clear of ANY relationship. I have friends, my cat, and my music. I am almost 64 with health issues so, I ain't anything to brag about. I really do not feel alone most of the time. After my experience, I am fearful of letting ANYONE in too close

I feel as though I wrote your post but I do feel alone but I have my girl.

 

[Mia6]

John is an alcoholic. It almost cost us our relationship. I actually did leave. For 2 weeks. He sobered up. Hasn't touched a drop since. He was never mean or violent. Not abusive. I didn't even see it as a problem for a long time. But he couldn't control himself. He thought he could have a beer and be fine. He was - that night. Within a week, he lost control. Got a bottle of whiskey and stayed drunk for 2 or 3 days. I just couldn't deal with it anymore. Let him know it was me or the booze. I'd like to think that he made the right choice.

Oh Alicia,

I am sorry and yes, he did make the right choice,

How are you doing?

 

[Alicia88]

I'm ok, I guess. Having trouble getting excited about Christmas.

 

[Furballsmom]

Having trouble getting excited about Christmas.

Me too a little bit, no idea why, but I've got decorations up and music going (when football isn't on lol), and The Baking will be starting soon

 

[Willowy]

John is an alcoholic. It almost cost us our relationship. I actually did leave. For 2 weeks. He sobered up. Hasn't touched a drop since. He was never mean or violent. Not abusive. I didn't even see it as a problem for a long time. But he couldn't control himself. He thought he could have a beer and be fine. He was - that night. Within a week, he lost control. Got a bottle of whiskey and stayed drunk for 2 or 3 days. I just couldn't deal with it anymore. Let him know it was me or the booze. I'd like to think that he made the right choice.

My dad is a recovering alcoholic just like that. He hasn't touched a drop of alcohol since 1988. A few months ago he said he really wanted a beer, and I told him I'd buy him one beer and take his keys away, but he said that would just start the cascade. . .I'm glad he knows his limits. It never goes away.

 

[Alicia88]

A friend of mine hasn't had a drink in over 10 years. She was a pretty bad alcoholic. One night, she took a stop of a drink and immediately started throwing up. Took a pregnancy test and it was positive. Hasn't had a single drink since.

 

[Lari]

Cross section of the pie!

I'm pretty proud.

 

[Furballsmom]

Wow!!

 

[LTS3]

Would a tailor shop be able to sew a single button back on a sweater? Or is that a minor thing that's not worth their time doing? I have zero skills at sewing.

 

[Graceful-Lily]

Would a tailor shop be able to sew a single button back on a sweater? Or is that a minor thing that's not worth their time doing? I have zero skills at sewing.

Do you have a friend who knows how to sew?

If you lived closer, my mom could have done it in less than half an hour. It's not hard if you know what you're doing but that's what tailors exist for, right?