The loss of my beautiful cat brought me here..

[lbailey]

So I lost my cat a month ago, she was fifteen. I got her when she was eleven, and we developed a great relationship. She was so personable, and would go on road trips with me, hang out at a cafe, settle into a hotel room... I thought she was one of the most amazing creatures, ever... would have made a great human as well. I feel terrible about how she ended... and I guess in my research about cats, to understand them better, and see what I did wrong, I found this site. There was another heat wave here in L.A. in the beginning part of September, and my cat started to get really distant and distressed, I took her to the emergency room on a Thursday night, they sent me home with fluids to administer. I did that the next morning, then later that morning she had a seizure... she had another that day. I took her to the emergency room again, she was given fluids and calcium(apparently had very low levels of calcium sending her to seizure), she was discovered to have thyroid problems. It was discussed that she had a lot going on, and would be medicated and treated for the rest of her life which could be short or longer. I tried to medicate her, but she was resistant, and stopped eating. She was still drinking water, but that decreased. I took her to the hospital again on Monday because I couldn't get medicine or food down her. On Tuesday the vet called and said she had another bad seizure, we talked and my cat would be a cat that needed treatments and medicines, tests, and more tests.... I decided to bring my cat home that night, I was scared by the vet, they were not giving me straightforward answers about wether I should put my cat down or if she had a decent life in her still. I had wondered about slight problems in the few years I had her, I tried finding a homeopathic vet, but didn't find one I liked... I changed my cats diet to real food, it seemed to help a bit, and it felt better to feed real food. It seemed a lot better than the food the vet fed her when I hospitalized her. And, when I brought her home from the vet on that Tuesday night, my cat was in a state of retardation, couldn't control herself, didn't know what she was doing, nor where she was going, couldn't talk or respond to my calls, I thought she was going to die that night. I later talked with another homeopathic vet, and she thought that sounded like Laurel Pet Hospital tranquilized my cat, but didn't discuss the true state of my cat, rather tried to appease me with compliments about my cat eating ravenously and that licking herself (uncontrollably, in a drugged out state) was a sign of being happy. My cat walked right over the food bowl the vet set down... I felt duped. Basically after all of this, I thought my cat was on her way out, I didn't want to subject her to many treatments, and medicines to stave off the inevitable... so from Tuesday night to Friday, I tried to feed her with little success.... she wasted away, and got weaker by the half day. On Thursday night we had special moments, and she seemed stronger, walked better, and stayed close to me. Friday we had a good moment where I think we were saying good bye... I had a euthanasia appointment set for that day but chickened out.... later, she scared me when she crawled into the bathroom sink and slept... impulsively I picked her up and put her in the sun on the patio... I was debating what to do about her, and was going to take her to another emergency room visit at another vet, and when I went out to retrieve my cat, she was gone. Many friends said she probably walked off to die, but in fact someone in my apartment complex had picked her up and took her to a shelter (the West LA shelter). I found this out later, and it doesn't rest well with me, I have been able to talk with these people briefly, but still I had no real closure with my cat. It has taken a month for the shock of all this to fade away, and now I can feel the loss. I feel inexperienced in cat ownership, and don't know if my actions were poor, it seems I could have done better to have decided on a vet that I liked, but I am natural driven, and many conventional medicinal establishments worry me... I guess though, some homeopathic vets worried me too. I needed better guidance and support through this experience. It feels like I didn't do this right, was I supposed to put her through the medicine route, or let her go like I did? It seemed to happen so fast, and when I look back... I thought she was just bored, or didn't like me much anymore, when in fact she was probably feeling bad, and I didn't observe signs for what they were... Though this is a long, it is the story about my cat, and hopefully I can gain a better understanding of cats, and perhaps bring another into my life. I cannot stress enough how much I loved and respected this cat, I tried to share her with everyone, of course they would see how amazing she was..!

 

[addicted2cats]

Hi,

I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't believe that someone would take your cat like that. I think you did everything right. We have to trust our guts when it comes to our health, but especially when it comes to our cats. I know your baby would have preferred to be with you when she left this earth, but she knew you loved her. 

I think you should get another cat. They are so wonderful to have around. This seems to be a great site where you can learn so much and share funny, sad, and inspiring stories. Please continue to post here and let us know if you get another kitty. You know we are all here for you. Any one of us on this site can help you through tough times and answer questions regarding cat care.

Best of luck on becoming a new kitty mom.

 

[lbailey]

Thank you for the kind words, kind of a lot to read... yah, this site looks like I can learn some stuff, and get more into the world of owning these neat animals.

 

[Draco]

I am sorry to hear about your cat

Welcome to TCS. Feel free to stick around and learn!

 

[cat-astrophe]

I am so sorry you had to go through that and that you have lost your baby, perhaps the people in your complex

saw a really sick cat and not knowing what to do thought it would be better to take it to someone who might know, I certainly hope there was no malice in it.  There are alot of people who know just how you feel about losing your beautiful cat, me included, I hope the days get easier for you.

 

[lbailey]

I meant what I wrote was a lot to read..

 

[kookoo4kitties]

Hi,

I just joined the forum about ten minutes ago and came in to introduce myself and my fur baby when I stumbled upon your story. Let me share with you the fact that tears are pouring down my face at the moment. I am so, so sorry for your loss and I agree, you should get another baby to love, but always being sure to allow yourself to grieve the one you lost. I have a little insight on this, a story that is in a round about way similar, though it didn't involve pet death. I won't double post it, since I plan to post it in my own thread, if you are interested, please visit.

But please, know that it will get easier. Above all, believe in your heart that you did everything you could. When the doubts start to surface, say it out loud "I did all that I could" do it until you believe it, and then remember a happy time you shared together. Hold onto those moments and cherish them always, but when you do feel ready to bring a new baby home, don't go into it with false expectations. No kitty will ever replace the one you lost, they are all wonderful in unique ways. Gentle thoughts and best wishes to you in your time of mourning, may you find peace.

 

[cat-astrophe]

Wise words, you are so right, they say time heals and it really does and nothing can take away the memories or

the way our fur babies made us feel.. I am fostering 12 kittens at the moment, 4 of them are being fed by bottle

it is the most wonderful privilege to care for them until they are ready to go to new homes.  I hope that these babies

get wonderful forever homes with people like the people on the cat site.

 

[lbailey]

Hi All, thank you for the support, thanks for reading my long scroll, this site will help to release and relieve sadness I have for Lucy the cat... and prepare me for the next cat I will probably get. You're right though, none will be Lucy, slight sadness, but many felines are amazing animals! Nice to see some of yours with photos and stories!

 

[whisperer]

I so sorry about your girl. She was obviously very loved and you did everything in your power to give her a good life. Although she was not with you when she left, she spat ill knew she was loved. She still knows she is loved. Se is still there, just without a body.

It is never goodbye; just I'll see you later.

Welcome to TCS and I hope you stick around

 

[whisperer]

Still*

 

[lbailey]

Thank you... Today I finally had a chance to go in person to the shelter and try and track down my cat's last moments, it's harder to track when the animal was probably put down right away. One thing though, is this little trip allowed me to be motivated to volunteer at the shelter, and perhaps spend time with some of the kitties in there... it will be good to spend time with cats where my cat was last. I would recommend some of you getting some of these kitties, many seemed very pleasant and eager to get out of those cages, and find a human to love them! Dogs too, are there, and look eager to find a home... I'm partial to the feline though!

Miao... like Ciao!

 

[cat-astrophe]

That is wonderful, good for you, that is what I did to help my heart heal, I started fostering cats and kittens and it has helped heal my heart and

given me a new passion.  Sometimes out of terrible experiences comes good, hope you enjoy your volunteering at the

shelter.

 

[kookoo4kitties]

Hey - I was just thinking about you and wondering how you're doing? Hope you're doing well. = )

 

[kookoo4kitties]

Hey - I was just thinking about you and wondering how you're doing? Hope you're doing well. = )

 

[kookoo4kitties]

Hey - I was just thinking about you and wondering how you're doing? Hope you're doing well. = )

 

[kookoo4kitties]

Jeeze, sorry about the multi-post. The site or my computer hiccuped or something.  = (

 

[lbailey]

Thank you for checking in, I am fine, still trying to figure out what exactly happened to my cat, didn't want to bother the people again as there was some tension about them picking up my cat, couple friends have said to let it go... so I'm trying through the shelter to figure out what happened. I have more sadness, like the void is settling in... but the good memories are also there. I went to the shelter a couple of days ago, and that gave me a little more finality, and saw some other kitties which was nice. I want to volunteer now at the shelter, though I work every day, and spend some time petting cats, just spend time at the last place Lucy was!

 

[kookoo4kitties]

That sounds like a really neat idea! A way to be close with caution, and maybe in time you'll fall in love again.

If you ever need an ear, feel free to pm me.

 

[margecat]

I'm so sorry to bear about your kitty.

Welcome aboard.