Sugar, our "miracle" cat has crossed the Bridge

les26

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Well, we just got back from the vet and we had to put our girl Sugar down, she was worse than we thought, the vet said it looked like the tumor on the left side of her face was bigger although to me it looked like the swelling went down but she said it also was moving down towards her neck more and thought it was affecting her eye, thats why her third eyelid was showing and she said the eye most likely was painful so we felt badly about that but also knew we were making the right decision. Her body weight index thing was a 1 which is the lowest it could be, and when I was sobbing and asked the vet "are you sure it is time?" she said "yes, if this was my cat I would do it", so we held her as she was injected and she went peacefully in a matter of seconds which told us that she was ready to go, she was weary and ready to go and have her sweet soul released, no more tumors or mouth issues or eye issues, that is all gone now and she is fine now, just fine, and when we see her again I told her "it will be tears of joy not sadness" and I think she knew what we were doing and why, she couldn't have gone on like that any longer, but it is so so sad, we were crying our eyes out, this one really hurt, I think because of what she went through when she almost died 4 years ago at that same vet, she was getting a cancerous tumor removed from under her chin and some dental work and she had a HORRIBLE reaction to the anesthesia, they had to drive her to a specialty vet hospital 50 minutes away, and a week and MUCH money later she came home, she lost some eye sight because of a drug they had to give her, it took a few years off of ALL our lives, but she was pretty good until about 2 months ago, she had issues eating but we discovered that she had a mass on the left side of her face, they didn't know if it was a tooth/gum issue or if the cancer came back, but it must've been the cancer returning, they wanted us to take her to a vet dentist 50 minutes away to do a biopsy and we said no, we weren't going to put her through anything at 17 years old and if it was cancer we wouldn't have done chemo or radiation so what was the point? But she lived her time out here, she was getting so thin and the last few days she stopped jumping up onto chairs or the recliner, she would just lay around and we had to bring her food to her, she would wander into the kitchen to drink but then couldn't find her way out, her eyesight was getting really bad, and she would pee in the kitchen, so we knew it was time to get her checked and we did but we knew what was to come....but she is free and fine now, no more pain, no more suffering, just fine.

"Be free sweetheart Sugar, we love you and will miss you but we will see you again someday and it will be wonderful! Have fun at the Bridge with Smoke, Sassy, Serenity, Simon, Skipper, Sebastian and Sabrina" and Sabrina we just lost 9 weeks ago which is really hard too.

"WE LOVE YOU SUGAR!!!!!!" :rbheart: :hugs: :tabbycat: Until we meet again.......
 
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Norachan

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I'm so sorry les26 les26

:hugs:

I think they know when it's their time to go. I lost one of my cats to cancer just before Christmas and she was acting the way Sugar did at the end too. They get so tired and lose interest in food and even if you can manage to get them to eat a little they just get thinner and thinner by the day.

Sugar knew it was her time to go, that's why she came to say goodbye to you. You did the right thing by letting her go without having to suffer too much.

Rest in peace Sugar
 

Mamanyt1953

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Rest you gentle, Sugar, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

I think that the kindest, gentlest, most loving and so dad-gummed difficult thing we ever have to face is setting our own heartbreak aside to do what is best for a loving friend, a family member who has shared our home and our hearts for so long. This I know...Sugar lived, breathed and had her being wrapped in your and Deb's love, and she left This Adventure for her Next Great Adventure still wrapped in that love. Now from her new home in That Place Where All Things Are Known, she blesses you both for every moment of your care and love, and she sends her own love, purified and translated into Love, back to walk with you down through all of your days. Because Love abides. Always, forever, Love abides.
 

Antonio65

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I have no words to ease you pain les26 les26 .
Your Sugar went through so much but kept loving you until it was time for to leave. But we all know it's just a temporary separation, and one of these days we will be al together again.

Sugar is now with all your other cats who left you and are waiting for you.

RIP Sugar, you are free from pain now, but the love from your family will last forever.
 

Caspers Human

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I'm sorry your Sugar passed away.

I've had so many animals; dogs, cats, horses, goats and all sorts of small critters that you think I'd be used to it but I still feel sad every time. Whether it be my old dog, "Sam," or my cat, "KC" I still have fond memories of each one.

Whether it happrns after dinner at a family gathering, sitting around a campfire, drinking beers or just hanging out in the living room, I often find myself recalling stories about old pets, long since passed away.

There was the time when the dog was carrying a balloon in his mouth and he popped it.

There was another time when I was asleep in bed and I had a dream that I was walking barefoot through a briar patch, only to wake up and find my cat clawing and toying with my feet.

I predict it won't be long before you start telling stories about the times you shared with Sugar, too. :)

I think you did the right thing. It takes courage. :alright:
 

di and bob

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My soul is so sad for you and Deb having to go through all of this yet one more time, yet knowing that what you gained for having so much love in your life is so much more precious. She was in your life for a reason, she knew she would receive the love and the care of such a loving family, and even 4 more years after her horrible reaction. You knew deep down in your soul she was suffering, there was no cure, there was no future except one full of pain.
You are so fortunate to have one such as her in your life. One that gave you so much love that filled your soul with happiness and gave you one of this world's most precious treasures, the gift of a cat's love.......
Unfortunately, their life spans are not as long as ours. There comes a time when they must say goodbye, especially when their lives are painful or have lost all meaning and happiness. It was her time, she was ready, and she now soars free and happy, sending her thanks and love back to a hurting heart, one that is broken into a thousand pieces because of her departure. Time is the only thing that helps with matters of the heart. and it takes a lot of it. Time will dull the sharp edges of grief and turn your memories of sorrow into the ones that are so much more meaningful, the happy ones of your time with her and the sharing of your love.
NOONE can take away the bond of love you hold with that precious girl. Not even death can take something that never dies.
She will forever be as close as your thought and prayers, pray to her and she will send you comfort.
She now joins all your other little ones in that glorious place beyond the stars. There she will wait for your glorious reunion, she is in perfect peace because of your love that she holds in her heart. "Do not cry because it is over, smile because it happened".
RIP precious Sugar. You will never be forgotten, you will always have a secure place in loving herats. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!
 

epona

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It's such a huge responsibility to release them from suffering and know when is the right time to do it - you absolutely did the right thing for your darling.

I am so sorry for your loss. Knowing that you did the right thing does not necessarily make it any easier to bear or come to terms with your loss. Much love to you and yours.
 
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les26

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Thank you all for your kind messages and heartfelt words, they really mean a lot to Deb & I. :rbheart:

She is the 8th cat that we have lost, so we know the routine of grief and sadness and the panic and anxiety and depression that it brings, but it doesn't make it any easier but we are dealing with it. We both said while we were at work and busy and our minds were busy we were pretty good, but when you had time to think and thought about it the flood gates opened. And especially when we came home from work, we BOTH started to look for her and then we realized it and lost it again, but we keep saying that we can't dwell on the sad ending and last moments and how she looked last night, but to know she is happy and healthy again and can see again and see clearly, no more eye issues, and can eat without pain, no more cancer, no more pain EVER again, and it eases our minds and hearts...but it will go back and forth a million times, being okay to very sad and everything in between, but with time it will ease.

We both said that the "real" Sugar had been gone for awhile now and she was, she wasn't the same but we held on to hopes that she would rebound. But it turns out she was sicker than we knew, but when it became obvious to me was the last few days she wasn't jumping up on chairs anymore and just laying around so we knew it was time, and we think she knew it too and was/is relieved that we helped her out of this pain riddled body and set her beautiful soul free.

And Deb looked it up, she was 14 not 17 as I stated, but that wasn't too bad. And she might have lived a bit longer if she never went through that horrible episode 4 years ago.

But one thing that I am struggling with is I keep seeing her sweet little head bobbing around when the vet brought her back into the room after taking her out to put the tube in to put the sedative and medicine to put her to sleep, just the look on her little face and her eyes looking around, that image really bothers me for some reason, I don't know if that is what the grief is focusing on but that image comes into my head and I get so sad and upset....but I try to think that she is fine now, she CAN SEE and she isn't doing that anymore, every time I dwell on that image, I try to "shift gears", but if anyone has any ideas how I can stop doing that please let me know as it is VERY upsetting to me....

We truly appreciate it, thank you all and God Bless......:rbheart:
 

di and bob

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There is ALWAYS a 'last' vision you hold on to and it tears you in two. For me it was my precious little girl lifting her head up for the last time when she got ran over and i was running towards her. There is no way to ever forget it, it is burned into your mind and soul. I had to purposely grasp on to anything to get the image out of my mind, it seems to help to have people around to distract you. Laying in bed at night was the worst.
Time will fade the emotions, they are much more manageable as time goes by. Reading helped me a lot, get something you are interested in. It is when you are alone with your thoughts that it is the worst. Ive had SO many horrible images this last ten years. So many deaths. If i let my mind stay there i would go insane. You have to try to push them to the side when they come up. Say a prayer for them, ask them to accept your prayers and to rest in peace. Tell them thank you for the wonderful times you had together and that you are so sad they had to leave. Dont put human emotions to them, they just simply knew and felt your love deep inside their soul. Thats all that is important.
Im so sorry, i know how much this takes out of you, you are not alone, I and any member on this site will be here any time you need us. Les, hold on to your wife, let her and your remaining babies help you through this. GOD BLESS YOU.
 

Furballsmom

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It's so hard, I know. When I took my angel Moffit in to be to be pts from advanced ckd, there were a couple of things that stabbed me right through the heart, but one in particular was when the vet tech got her out of the carrier, a back claw hooked on the carpet remnant on the bottom, the tech kept drawing her out and she meowed in pain/complaint.

Still gets me and it's been more than 10 years.

Say a prayer for them, ask them to accept your prayers and to rest in peace. Tell them thank you for the wonderful times you had together and that you are so sad they had to leave.
This really really can make a difference for that initial mental replaying.
 
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les26

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Thank you both for the last two posts, I really think that I am focusing on that image I described because I KNEW the vet was bringing her back into the room to start to administer the meds to put her down, I knew this was the last time that she would be carried into a room by a vet and that this was the end, it was going to be over and final in a few minutes. If the vet was bringing her in wrapped in a towel just to give her back to us to say "her she is, you can go home now" for any routine visit I might think how cute and helpless she looked, but knowing that this was to be put down I was hit with the "finality" of it, if that is even a word.

I also remember fixating on other things when some of them passed, Simon's little head and body going limp as I held him and he was put down, Sebastian with his front right leg caught in the mini blinds when I got home from work and me freeing like crazy to get him out and me looking skyward pleading "please God, not like this.....don't let it end like this" and him dying seconds after I freed him. I think the mind and the grief try to pick an image to fixate on so we remember that what we had happen was terrible, but we have to focus on the fact that they are fine now, just fine, and those images do fade with time, I can recall them with the boys that I talked about but it doesn't hurt my heart or put me into a panic attack like it did years ago, they aren't pleasant memories but I don't feel so gut punched from them like this new image is trying to do to me. Thank you both VERY MUCH for the replies, and I am sorry that you also have images stuck in your mind of bad things.

I don't have a picture to put on here of her, we aren't really that technologically advanced lol, but if you Google "tomlyn nutri-cal gel for cats" you'll see a picture of a grey cat that REALLY resembles what she looked like, just add a little tuft of white fur under her neck and green eyes and that is pretty much her, and we have that bottle at home, so when I feel badly or that bad image creeps into my mind I can just look at this bottle and say "this is what she looks like now", and that really seems to help, having a picture where she looks good again as I know that's her now again!!

THANK YOU BOTH!!!!! :) :rbheart:
 

Caspers Human

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we keep saying that we can't dwell on the sad ending
DIGNIFIED ending, more like! :)

It's not a very happy time. You have the right to be sad. You can also take a little bit of solace in knowing that you "done right" by your cat!

If there's any way for it to happen, IMO, this is the way it should be done.
Sad as it is, you can also feel some pride.

A little fun fact: The abbreviation, "R.I.P." is actually Latin for "Requescet in Pace."
(Pronounced: REK-we-es-chay een PA-chay)

Sugar: Requescet in Pace.

It sounds more dignified and important when you say it in Latin. Doesn't it? ;)
 

Furballsmom

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so when I feel badly or that bad image creeps into my mind I can just look at this bottle and say "this is what she looks like now", and that really seems to help, having a picture where she looks good again as I know that's her now again!!
There you are, bless your heart 💖❣

Lol, nice! I never knew how to pronounce that correctly :)
 

Antonio65

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A little fun fact: The abbreviation, "R.I.P." is actually Latin for "Requescet in Pace."
(Pronounced: REK-we-es-chay een PA-chay)
Actually it's Requiescat In Pace (or Requiescant in Pace if it's referred to more than one subject), in Latin.
And it's pronounced Rek-we-es-cat in Pa-che [ /re.kwiˈes.kat in ˈpa.t͡ʃe/ ]

What is really interesting is that the acronym RIP is the valid in a few languages, Latin, Italian and English.
 

Antonio65

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but if anyone has any ideas how I can stop doing that please let me know as it is VERY upsetting to me....
As di and bob di and bob said, all of us who have gone through such these terrible and desperate moments, retain one or more final vision that will haunt us forever.
At first, the pain seems to blind us and we can't think of anything else but the fact our beloved pet isn't with us anymore. Then, these visions set in and they will be likely the only think that will keep us company.

I have so may of these visions before my eyes, everytime I read of some pets who leaves to the bridge, or anyway a few times a day. Because I never let a day go by without thinking of all my beloved cats who left me in tears.
So far, I didn't find a way to keep those images away from my mind, I'm sorry.
 
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