Struggling With Play Time

[Animal Freak]

I think it's anxiety. She's always been a bit clingy, especially with me. And my aunt wasn't working so Stella wasn't left alone much. Then, even when my aunt did leave, there were other dogs. I doubt they were very good company, but it might have helped. Before we took her in, we were bringing her with us every other weekend to let her and the cats adjust, but she would actually get depressed when we took her back. She would whine at the door for close to an hour and didn't want to eat. After a few times, we just kept her. And when we leave she won't touch her own toys. They'll be exactly where they were left, but if I don't give her a play session and/or something to do while we're gone, she'll tear up cat toys, tissues, napkins, etc. Fortunately, nothing important. However, she does have a nasty habit of getting in the litter boxes every now and then. I have yet to figure out how to break that habit.

Yeah, I can only imagine. Sometimes I wonder why I want to get myself into that. But then I think of all the animals those shelters can't help and all those that I could. The more shelters we have, the better because that can help take the strain off of the existing ones. And decrease the amount of animals going into kill shelters.

I'm glad too. My life would be much more boring without them. Which is saying something since it's not all that exhilarating. But they make sure I have something to do. Ember has been especially needy today. She goes around the house meowing like Ash. So I have to get up and go follow her. Normally she gets a toy and carries it somewhere, then starts meowing until I get up and follow her. She'll usually show me her "kill" and then demand attention. And she'll keep meowing until I do that or just pick the toy up.

Well, so far so good. The only thing I noticed is that Ember got agitated when Ash was in my room last night. She didn't attack, but she looked like she wanted to. He was on the ottoman (after scratching both scratchers) when she came in. She only came a few steps into my room before stopping and she started lashing her tail. After a moment, she walked up to the base of the ottoman and stared at him. I was just about to break it up because it was getting to the point she looked like she'd attack when Ash jumped down and ran out of my room. I was surprised Ember didn't go after him. Usually the sudden movement would set her off. I brought him back in though and set him on my bed and petted him. I don't want him to think he can't go in my room. Though, honestly, I don't know why I refer to it as "my room." I get to decorate it and sleep in it, but it's really "Ember's room." But Ash didn't stick around. I let him leave and he walked right past Ember. She seemed to be calmer when I brought him in there.

 

[calicosrspecial]

It could be anxiety. Poor thing. But you will help her. I used gates to keep the dogs away from the litter boxes. That was the only way I figured out how to stop it.

Your mindset is exactly he right one. One has to be doing it for the animals. Otherwise it is so difficult I think. Not everybody is able to do it but thank goodness people do devote their lives to saving animals.

Yep, they do that. They love attention and love and play. One of mine has been real clingy as well. It is cute they love their attention.

That is a good encounter. Ember could have been bad (territorial) but she chose not to. Terrific. And it sounds like Ash was pretty good (I would like to see him walk away normally and confidently). When a cat runs they can give the misinterpretation of being prey. But if they walk confidently away then they tend not to be attacked.

Think of it as "our room" or "their room" as opposed to "Ember's room". A small thing but how we think of things and how we act can have an impact sometimes. But that is small, you are doing a great job with them!!

 

[Animal Freak]

We have the advantage of Stella being afraid of doors. Well, maybe not so much afraid of them, but she doesn't like to touch them. So we keep the doors shut enough she can't get in, but open enough that the cats can. The only problem is that if you close them too much, the cats will throw them wide open. Gates would probably be better, but also a bit of a nuisance. One is in my room and I'm a klutz. Another is in the storage room which we have to take Stella through to get to the backdoor. I worry about Ash too. He jumps fine and his legs don't seem to bother him much, but I don't like making him do it continuously.

Well, I hope I'm one of those people who can. I get stressed easily and have anxiety, but I'm hoping to get over a lot of that. I think it's easier to deal with it when it comes to animals though. It's worth it.

They seem to be getting along all right for the most part. Ash has been in my room today with no problems. Ember was in a bit of a playful mood today. She went absolutely crazy playing with Stella's elk antler. She was jumping around and would run off all of a sudden. Then she was meowing and running and meowing some more. She go after the dog a big twice today, but nothing serious.

They all (except Stella) got their nails trimmed today and did pretty good. Ash bit me, but not hard. Then Frost bit me too, but even softer than Ash. It was new though. He doesn't usually bite. However, we had some issues brushing. Ash was giving me a hard time with his back legs, one in particular. I don't know if I should just give up and hope he lets me next time or if I need to get it brushed even very quickly. But he end up slapping at me. The motion itself isn't all that uncommon as he did it fairly often before we got him on glucosamine, but it wasn't just once. Every time I moved my hand towards him, he'd do it and he did get me with a little bit of claw once. Nothing bad and I don't think he really wanted to hurt, but it is a bit concerning. He hissed at me as well which, of course, made Ember agitated.

 

[calicosrspecial]

Is Stella about the same size as Ash and Frost? Or is she bigger? Some gates have a kind of criss cross that cats can walk through yet dogs can't (or are afraid to).

It would be wonderful if you are but it is ok if you aren't. I think I know you pretty well by now and I am VERY confident that you will get over any anxiety and be able to handle stress in the future. You are too intelligent and have so much going for you. I know you will with animals and anyone or anything. I think you are going to great things in life whatever path you choose.

That sounds like they are doing really well. Ash in your room, Ember happy playing. Wonderful. I love when cats play like Ember did.

I am not an expert on grooming so you may want to start a post getting expert opinion but ......... If the cat starts to get funny just give them a little time to calm down and try again. I am guessing there is some discomfort going on but it isn't always necessary. He/they were just saying "knock it off". If they wanted to hurt you they would have but they didn't. Some cats get funny if you pet them to much (over-stimulation). It just depends but anytime you sense they are getting "funny" just back off and give them some time to relax. I know it is hard when you have to do things (brush) to keep them from getting knots etc.

 

[Animal Freak]

That's interesting. I would need one that opened like a door though because I'd still have to get Stella and myself through. Stella is around the same height as them, but shorter in length. She's a bit of a coward though so I doubt she'd go through it if it was small enough that she even might touch it. Like I said, she refuses to even so much as touch the doors.

Well, I'd really like to. I don't know what else I'd do. I like the idea of traveling and have considered a writing job that would let me do so, but I could never give up animals.

It was cute to watch. I wish I got it on video, but it was dark and I figured she'd stop the second I moved to turn the light on. They've been doing good. I guess maybe that knot really did create some tension.

I'll post if it happens more than once, but there has been one or two occasions since he's been on the glucosamine that he got a bit defensive and he rarely tolerates much more than a few seconds before starting to get agitated. It was just that he seemed to react worse this time. I'm hoping it's just a one time thing, but if it keeps up then I'll definitely get some other opinions. He seems fine otherwise. He gets on the cat trees and on the bathroom sink even if he does normally slide off the other side because it's probably no more than an inch thick and curved.

 

[FordChick]

Laser Light. Period.

 

[calicosrspecial]

The gates are like an accordion. You can slide them sideways and then slide back. My cats would go through them some dogs will go through them but maybe Stella wouldn't.

I think you could do pretty much anything you choose. Just choose something that you enjoy. Oh, I know, you will always do something with animals whether it is volunteer or run your own.

I can imagine how cute it was. Yes, anytime a person turns the light on or moves etc they stop.

I am glad they are doing well, maybe it was that Ash was a bit uncomfortable?

It is tricky. At least it seems like he is better. If he is jumping up he must feel pretty good which is great. Just keep an eye on him.

 

[Animal Freak]

That's cool. I doubt she would, but she could surprise me. I did pay more attention to her height and she has about an inch or so on Ash, but she's much more wary of things like that than any of the cats.

Yeah, I don't think I could do anything else. Sometimes the idea of not having to worry about them or make sure I'm home in time to feed them sounds nice, but I know I'd be miserable whenever I didn't have something to occupy my time with. They're worth it.

It seems like that might have been the case. Ember is usually the one who starts something, but she seems to be the most sensitive to the moods of others. It wouldn't surprise me if his tension alone was what set her off. He was curled up on my bed when I got home today. It's kind of odd because it seems like there's these times where he isn't welcomed in there. He'll stop hanging out in my room and, if he does go in, Ember gets really agitated. However, all it takes is me getting him in there. Then it all goes right back to normal. Ember is fine with him there and he enjoys curling up in my blankets.

I definitely will. I have to admit, his arthritis is a concern to me. I worry about if it'll continue to get worse and how quickly. What the quality of his life will be. Right now it's minor enough that the glucosamine pretty much takes care of it and you can't even see a problem until I brush behind his legs. Even then it's usually very minor and he just gets a bit agitated.

 

[Animal Freak]

Laser Light. Period.

Yes, that's what seemed to work with Ember. The other two have little to no interest in it though. They seem to like being difficult.

 

[FordChick]

Yes, that's what seemed to work with Ember. The other two have little to no interest in it though. They seem to like being difficult.

Ahhh..yes, i have a cat who usually could care less

It is nuts how every cat is different..different personalities, quirks, preferences...etc

 

[calicosrspecial]

At least it might be an option that could work especially since she is that size and more cautious of things.

They are so worth, I agree!!

There is no question in my mind that cats can really sense emotions (of people or other cats) so it is very possible Ember takes that on and gets uneasy and is more on edge.

Some cats are more territorial and it can come and go in spurts. And if one is near and there is no issue then they can get comfortable. I am not sure if I am explaining it very well but I guess I am saying there is sometimes worry about what might happen that causes issues and then when a cat realizes the reality in the here and now and things are fine they then don't worry. It is the fear of the unknown thing.

I know, it is a concern but at least for now he seems to be doing ok with the glucosamine. Fingers crossed that it keeps working. All we can do is do our best and deal with things as they happen (and do what we can do to forestall any issues). Sadly with life there are always things to worry about. But you are giving him a great life and that is most important.

 

[Animal Freak]

Yeah, I might look into it. Of course, it would be ideal if she could just learn to stay out of the litter boxes. The initial plan was that, once the cats accepted her, she'd start sleeping with me. It's probably for the best that she isn't since that would be three sharing my bed and she likes to be very close, but I'm worried during the winter because it gets cold and my mom doesn't like her snuggling. The idea of any of my animals being uncomfortable even for a minute bothers me, let alone the time it takes for my mom to realize Stella's cold or for the whole night. I've considered letting her sleep with me anyway, but I don't want to encourage her to be in my room.

That's what I'm guessing happened. Ash doesn't usually start fights. Actually, he never has intentionally. He's given her a warning swat, but nothing more.

That makes sense. I kind of figured that me getting them in there together allowed both to realize nothing bad came of it, but it seemed odd that it just... sort of happened. No big fight, no issues whatsoever (that I know of at least). Just this unspoken rule that my room is off limits to Ash that's set in place at random intervals and eradicated simply by me causing this rule to be broken. It usually goes on for a few days before Ash dares to go in and I notice the tension. That's when I start looking back and realize he hadn't been going in there. To me at least, it looks as if he stops going in there before there's even an issue. But I suppose there could be some subtle messages that I'm missing.

Yeah, I'm glad the glucosamine is helping. I know I shouldn't worry about it. I'm sure I have at least a few more years to go before I really need to, but I'm a worrier and I tend to plan very far in advanced. That combined makes me think about if it gets worse, how much worse it can get and what kind of life I can give him. He loves being up on the cat trees looking out the windows so much. I'd hate to see the day he can no longer jump up there.

 

[calicosrspecial]

Some of the beds are really warm and maybe some fleece or something could be added to help her stay warm? I would guess if she was too cold she would let you know but it is good to be concerned.

That is pretty normal. Cats communicate between each other a lot and we don't always pick up on it right away. It is about making it positive for them but watching for any unease and if you see it distract with something positive to let them know it is ok. It is a process but I know you can do it.

Oh I know but I have absolutely believe you will give him a great life and that you will deal with anything in the future in the best way. Just do your best to focus your energy on things you can control. Planning for things is good but worrying too much just isn't productive. I know it is easier said than done but I too have that issue and try to deal with it in that way. I have gotten better but I know it is hard. Just do your best as it does make things better in my opinion.

 

[Animal Freak]

Stella is a little too good of a dog at times. My mom has admitted that she's felt her and her fur was freezing. Then she's allowed up to get warm. I've thought about trying to find something to keep her warm, but I don't know what would be good for it. We got a pad that was suppose to retain heat, but she didn't like it. It's in the box for the feral now. She usually starts off warm and doesn't want to be under blankets. I can try look for some fleece though.

Yeah, I'll try keeping an eye on them. I might never see all the little signals, but I'd like to be able to catch that rule being set earlier rather than letting it go on for days.

I'll definitely try my best. I want him to be happy. I dread the day that he no longer can be though. But for now I'll keep trying to give him the best life I can. I might not always be able to keep him happy and comfortable, but right now I can. He's a good cat. They all are. They deserve the best.

 

[calicosrspecial]

Yeah there are beds that retain the heat but maybe she wouldn't like those either. Hmmmmmm

I think you will do fine. No one sees all the signals but I know you will work with them. It does take time though but you are able to do it.

They are and so are you. I do not worry one moment that you will not do your best for them. They are in great hands. They will be happy.

 

[Animal Freak]

I don't know. I'd like to find those gates you mentioned and see if they might work. If we got those, I could put a gate up in the bathroom doorway and she could come in my room. I can't promise it would work out since I'm not sure if I could sleep with her and the cats. I also don't want to stop the cats from sleeping in my bed during the winter, but I think we're beyond that now. I might get her a dog bed to put in my bed. Then I wouldn't have to worry about her. I could just reach over and feel her and let her snuggle if she's cold.

Well, I've put this much time into them. I'm not about the stop. I'd like to do whatever I can to help them all live in peace. I don't think I could handle it if they couldn't live together.

I'll do what I can to maintain and improve the situation. Hopefully Ash won't have to deal with any extreme discomfort for a long while.

 

[calicosrspecial]

Sounds like a plan. You can see. It will work out.

I have no worry, you will do a great job. You already have proven it.

I am highly confident you will. I hope so with Ash, he is a sweetie.

 

[Animal Freak]

I was looking at gates. Didn't find what you mentioned, but they do have some with a small door in them. However, they're quite expensive. I've never had to buy a baby gate before. And I need two of them.

He is. They're all sweet. They show their affection in different ways, but once you figure that out it's easy to see.

 

[calicosrspecial]

Sorry my computer died yesterday morning and I had to get a new computer. This keyboard is very difficult so please excuse any typos. My eye sight is not very good and it is pretty small and some of the buttons are in different places.

I don't know what they call the gates (accordian maybe) They are wood typically and look like Xs. They are really nice. I am old and have had these for decades so maybe they don't make them anymore?

Your cats sound amazing. I can see why you love them so much.

 

[Animal Freak]

That's fine. I understand about the keyboard. Yours sounds worse, but my current laptop was hard to adjust to. It's bigger than my previous one and the right shift key is hard to reach.

I guess it's possible. People are always updating things and getting rid of the supposedly old and outdated ones. I will keep an eye out for it though.

Ash had a bad night for brushing last night. I'm going to try again tonight (as long as I remember) and I'm hoping it was just a one night thing, but that was probably the worst yet. I could tell something was wrong right off the bat, but I underestimated the amount of trouble he'd give me. He's very good about laying on his side for me and will often even switch sides on his own. However, he laid straight down on his stomach. I pressed my fingers against one side by his spine which he takes as a signal to lay on his side. However, he immediately got agitated and a little nippy. He did lay on the opposite side with little trouble, but he got agitated about his back leg. However, once I got him on his other side, he wouldn't let me touch his that hind leg or even his back end. Hissing, growling, etc. He did slap me. I don't think it was his intention to hurt, but he would have if my sleeve hadn't covered my hand. I could feel the tips of his claws through the fabric and my hands are dry and sensitive. It wasn't quite so half-hearted as his usual attempts. I backed off though and he acted fine after that.