Stray supposedly not a stray?

kamijo

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We've been feeding the strays of our neighborhood for years. Normally once we've got a stray coming up daily we trap them and have them fixed and then return them. Doing this had cut down on the strays around.

One of the fixed strays we've been feeding for 2 years brought up a new cat. After a couple of weeks that cat has brought up kittens around 3 or 4 months old.

We named them all and plan on doing the same catch, fix and release for them. Until today...
My neighbor came over to tell me a women has been telling others at the church down the road that we have "stolen" her cat and kittens.

Now these kittens are very feral to the point if they even hear the door crack they take off. Now the mother has become friendly but you can't pick her up or you will get hurt. I had wondered if she was an abandoned cat for awhile now. It took a bit but whenever I would tend to my farm animals she would follow me but not get close and I would talk to her.

Now she comes running whenever she sees me and follows happily at my feet. I've checked my security cams and indeed seen a women coming by my house a lot. She never stops her car but she does call kitty kitty.

I'm wondering if I should stop her and talk to her? If she is the cats owner then why hasn't the cat been cared for? The cat was very skinny when she started coming up and would always be seen hunting birds around my back yard bird feeders. When she eats she does it so fast she chokes and is always on guard.

I'm just wondering if it would be right of me to catch, fix and release her when we do the kittens or if we should even fix the kittens as my husband is worried this women will become angry.

What are everyone thoughts? Also, lastly, is it wrong of us to be keeping the food available for the cat and her kittens if she has an owner?
 

jefferd18

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I have never heard of an adult moaning that somebody had stolen their mother cat and her kittens. A little kid maybe, but not an adult. She not only sounds like she is an incompetent cat owner but also may have a few screws loose too.

I personally think it would wrong of you to discontinue feeding her, since she has gotten so dependent on those feedings.

That cat chose you- end of story.
 

Sylvia Jones

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I would ask your neighbor who the woman is and if she knows how to contact her. Since you have been told the mom and kittens belong to her then she should be contacted. That is what I would hope someone would do for me. You will not know the situation until you have given her this courtesy. I also do not think you should have the kittens fixed. Who knows at this point she may well be planning on doing that herself or would be open to your help with that if she needs it.. But at this point you have been told they have an owner so it is not your decision to make. As for feeding since you have already been doing so I would continue but contact the owner as soon as possible. It’s great that you have been helping them you obviously have the best intentions and a Big heart! Talk to the owner and then you will know so much more Good luck
 

Jcatbird

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Hi! I applaud you for all you are doing to help the kitties around you.:clap2: I wish everyone was as caring and kind! I don’t know where you live but most places have laws that consider neglect to be abusive and illegal. I see no reason why you should stop feeding an animal that comes onto your property. That said, If the cat is running loose , perhaps she ran away from home? Got lost? If she is not spayed she could have left to mate. Is there any way you can find out why the woman thinks you stole the cat? I know that if I thought that my cat was at another home, I would inquire about her but maybe the woman is timid. I think I would try to talk to the woman. Just ask if she is missing a cat and get the information straight from her. She may have a good reason why the Mom appears neglected. Perhaps someone accidentally let her out. The woman could have been sick, out of town or in some way incapacitated and others neglected that cat. It would be sad if she had lost a beloved pet and is just scared to come forward. If the woman can not give you a clear description, photos, vet reference or information about the kitties etc. then you can proceed further. Checking for a microchip might help too. It’s always best to get good information before making a judgement. If the woman is simply claiming a cat that she tossed food to outside without providing decent care, it should become clear after a little bit of investigation. I’ve often had to go through this process myself when dealing with cats that appeared here. A few times I found an owner and they had a very good explanation as to how their cat got out. In one case there were two little girls who had taken the kitty out to play when they were not supposed to do that. Stuff happens sometimes. In most cases I never located an owner and I went through proper channels to Spay/neuter, vet and establish myself as owner or find the kitties a loving home. Either way, the cat and kittens need a safe life and it sounds like you are the key to their rescue. You’re a kind and loving human, ask questions, trust your heart and instincts.
 

fionasmom

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There are a lot of great ideas posted for you to follow, but have plan B if it ends up that she is a nut who wants her cat to have kittens, does not believe in spaying/neutering, etc. I believe you can finagle your way around that kind of situation with common sense and charm, but over the years that I have worked with ferals, and even just pets who should be fixed but have not been, I have been told to my face that the owner likes the cat to breed, wants kittens, has homes for them, is afraid of surgery for the cat, etc.
 
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kamijo

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Update for everyone:

I was able to get a name, number and address from my neighbor as she's in her reading group. I tried to contact her but she was very loud and aggressive over the phone. Shortly after a man showed up at my home saying he was her son. He told us that the mother cat's name is Bella, she is a year old.

They got her off a Craigslist ad for free kittens. She's been outside her whole life and his mother does not spend much time if any with the cat. She takes care of her 8 year old inside dog who doesn't like Bella.

He thanked me for feeding her and asked me to be forgiving to his mother. We talked about fixing her and her kittens. He had no problem with the kittens as they didn't even know she had any. He doesn't know about fixing Bella and he will be talking to his mother about it.

For now we will keep feeding all the strays as normal and we will make plans on fixing the kittens.
 

Jcatbird

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You did very well! Poor Bella! Maybe you can work through the son to get her spayed. If his mother spends no time with her then chances are, she will return to you. If she has never had any vet care, most places in the States , by law, require a rabies shot. Perhaps you can use that to help convince them to allow you to work with Bella if they resist. I’m time, they may just let Bella drift away and there will no longer be an issue. I have seen this problem before. Neglect is unacceptable. When things settle, perhaps some form of friendship ,or at least understanding ,can be developed and they will just focus on the dog. I have even known people who were able to purchase a cat for a small sum. If the dog was not properly introduced to the cat, it’s slightly possible that this could be accomplished later. I have to wonder if the woman simply does not know anything about cats. Education can often solve many things. Peace between you is best for everyone. Thank you for taking the time and effort to help these kitties and prevent unchecked breeding. Please do post back with updates.
 

tnrmakessense

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Update for everyone:

I was able to get a name, number and address from my neighbor as she's in her reading group. I tried to contact her but she was very loud and aggressive over the phone. Shortly after a man showed up at my home saying he was her son. He told us that the mother cat's name is Bella, she is a year old.

They got her off a Craigslist ad for free kittens. She's been outside her whole life and his mother does not spend much time if any with the cat. She takes care of her 8 year old inside dog who doesn't like Bella.

He thanked me for feeding her and asked me to be forgiving to his mother. We talked about fixing her and her kittens. He had no problem with the kittens as they didn't even know she had any. He doesn't know about fixing Bella and he will be talking to his mother about it.

For now we will keep feeding all the strays as normal and we will make plans on fixing the kittens.
I know it risks conflict, but I've fixed other people's cats that showed up for feeding and were outside more than inside after I'd tried to talk to the owners about their being outside and intact with no luck. It sounds as though the owner is not "all there", and in the couple days it would take to have the kitty fixed and keep her inside for recovery, she probably wouldn't even notice the absence. If you're not financially able to have her spayed right now, there is oral birth control containing megestrol acetate that you can add to the food once a week. By the second week they will not come in to heat. It's prescription only here in the US, but I order Nonovulin through EBAY from Bulgaria. I've used it for over 10 years in colonies and for inside cats where surgery would be risky. I've seen no side effects and it does prevent the cats from going in to heat.
 
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kamijo

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I'll have to check with my vet on Tuesday about seeing her. I'd like to get her health checked as well as the kittens once we can livetrap them. STDs are bad within the cats around my town and I always have them checked.

I think it would be best to get her fixed even if it goes against their wishes. Bella is a good mother but it's just safer for her health and the kittens. We had a stray a year ago that had kittens, turned out she had feline herpes which was past down to her kittens. They all were very sick before we found them. I was so saddened by it.

I wouldn't want that to happen again so I think just following our plan would be best.
 

kittychick

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You've definitely gotten some good advice (and pats on the back - - which are sometimes what's needed most in a situation like yours!) from some wonderfully caring members. As Jcatbird Jcatbird said - -poor, poor Bella. And I agree with Jcatbird Jcatbird (and many above) that at least the sone can likely be won over by education. Often in situations like this, people simply don't know better because they've never been told. It wasn't too many decades ago that virtually everyone let their cats be outside only or inisde/outside....and TNR was just a glimmer in people's minds. So it does sound like talking g to the son - - and explaining (there are many articles on this site -- and some printouts you could give him from Alley Cat Allies site (alleycat.org) which might help him (and maybe even his mother) understand why what your doing is so important for Bella. It sounds like you're the biggest shining light in her life that she has - - and that she needs you (even the son sounds as though he understands that). You're the best hope she has for living a longer, happier, healthier life. And I've been where you are - - it's tough when you find out a cat that's seemingly getting no affection, shelter, or medical care is actually an "owned" cat - - -and of course they're usually "owned" (and I use that term VERY sarcastically!) by the one person who shouldn't have her!

I think too many of us have been in situations, if not identical, to what you're dealing with. Who among us who TNR don't eventually run up against someone who swears that THEY'RE the one caring for Buffy/Tiger//Peanut/etc. and how dare you TNR them! After all - Buffy/Tiger/Peanut (or Bella) is "their" cat and how dare you help "their" cat, even though they pay little if any attention to them, often provide little or no shelter or food or vet care or love? And sadly, sometimes this logic extends to "but they SHOULD have kittens - they were born to have kittens - plus it's my decision since it's 'my' cat! While this situation is obviously (and understandably) very frustrating...upsetting....hurtful for you (you name the emotion - - I'm sure you're feeling it), I hope you know that (again - as many members above already commended you for) you're making a huge difference in the lives of not just the kitties you're helping directly, but you're saving all of those kittens that would have been born into a life that's often very short and very difficult. You've obviously been a "lone soul" out there helping what sounds like a fairly constant flow from dumping and/or a large colony - - and I know from experience how hard it is when you feel you're doing the right thing - - - often even when the money/time/etc. isn't easy to come by, but you keep going, knowing what you're doing is beyond commendable.

I do think it sounds like - given what the son said - your neighbor's family (if not your neighbor herself) is actually happy Bella's finally being cared for. I certainly would never tell someone they should take someone's cat without their knowledge and having it fixed/vetted/feed it/offer it shelter/etc. (hopefully my sarcasm is coming through). But Bella obviously needs you - - and is even seeking you out. And it sounds like - since obviously Bella disappears often from her "home" with your neighbor - -I know it may not be right, but I would probably take her to get her fixed. It doesn't sound like your neighbor would even realize she's been gone for a few days.Seriously - - I don't recommend taking "someone else's cat" - - but Bella sounds like she's your neighbor's car only in the sense that they picked her up. As far as whether or not to tell the son everything - - (again - I hate to even slightly recommend doing this behind their back as it certainly can backfire) - I'd probably try to talk to him again, giving him as much information as possible (again - check out the articles section on this site, and on the handouts section of the Alley Cat Allies site), and explaining to him how desperate the situation will become very quickly. It's almost February, and before we know it- - -it'll be "kitten season" once again! So i'd try to educate first...but I personally would probably proceed with TNR'ing her. I hate even saying that as going behind your neighbor's back obviously can cause real problems -- but as said above -- she even needs a rabies shot in order for your neighbor to avoid large fines etc (depending on the laws in your town). So I'd probably be a bad, criminal person, risking a life being branded a thief, and take Bella in and fix her.

Please keep us posted - - -I know I'll be thinking alot about you (and Bella) as I'm sure many of us here will! Sending good vibes your way that all works out best for al involved!!! :vibes:
 

di and bob

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If the owner contacts you, or you have a chance to talk to her, ask her about her feeding strategies. Why is the cat coming and bringing her kittens to you? I had the same situation with my neighbor, most of his cats died coming across the street to eat, it was horrible. He said he threw a little kibble out once in a while but cats "should be hungry to hunt". When I pointed out how thin they were, and were eating a lot, and having a lot of kittens, he said he didn't care they were just strays anyway. I told him I was going to fix them and he said he didn't care. I took in two he had left, had them fixed and still have them to this day. He has had a few more which I did have fixed too, but they died on the road. I also found homes for a few. I say, inform the women what you have planned and if she doesn't like it, she can start feeding them better. Those poor innoents deserve better.......
 

tnrmakessense

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I know it risks conflict, but I've fixed other people's cats that showed up for feeding and were outside more than inside after I'd tried to talk to the owners about their being outside and intact with no luck. It sounds as though the owner is not "all there", and in the couple days it would take to have the kitty fixed and keep her inside for recovery, she probably wouldn't even notice the absence. If you're not financially able to have her spayed right now, there is oral birth control containing megestrol acetate that you can add to the food once a week. By the second week they will not come in to heat. It's prescription only here in the US, but I order Nonovulin through EBAY from Bulgaria. I've used it for over 10 years in colonies and for inside cats where surgery would be risky. I've seen no side effects and it does prevent the cats from going in to heat.
Forgot a very important point regarding Nonovulin dosage. I, and other feral cat caretakers, use a much smaller dosage based on a chart authored by a veterinarian for a nonprofit T/N/R group whose volunteers use megestrol acetate as they're waiting to spay and neuter their ferals. The group uses megace liquid, liquid megestrol acetate, so I converted the chart to MG because Nonovulin is a tablet.

Dosage PER COLONY using Nonovulin 10 mg tablets

Total # of Cats Dosage per colony

< 5 cats 2.5 mg ONCE a week
5-7 cats 5 mg ONCE a week
8-11 cats 7.5 mg ONCE a week
12-15 cats 5 mg TWICE A WEEK
16-19 cats 7.5 mg TWICE A WEEK
20-23 cats 8 mg TWICE A WEEK
24-27 cats 10 mg TWICE A WEEK
28-31 cats 11 mg TWICE A WEEK
32-35 cats 12.5 mg TWICE A WEEKc
 

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I’m sorry your conversation was hostile But what did she actually say?
 
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kamijo

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I’m sorry your conversation was hostile But what did she actually say?
I introduced myself, I told her my neighbor gave me her number as well as telling her which house I lived at. When she heard my address she got loud. She said I stole her cat and I needed to give her back. That I was a bad person for leaving food out to lure cats to my home and claim them as my own. I tried to tell her that I've been feeding strays for years but she then called me a "f****** b****" and hung up.
 

Sylvia Jones

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Well, not much room for constructive conversation there. It seem this kitty has come to you looking for food and affection. Since that is exactly what she found she also brought her kittens. I’m so glad they found you! Please be careful and observant since you are dealing with such anger from your neighbor. As other members have said she probably wouldn’t notice if momma and kittens have been fixed but who knows. Unless she comes to physically get them and keep them inside I don’t see them choosing to go back. Go with your instincts. Thank you for what you are doing for these and what sounds like many others.
 

kittyluv387

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The momma needs to be spayed as well. She can't just be running around and getting pregnant just because of her negligent owner. A lot of cities don't technically allow that anyway.
 

fionasmom

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I wonder if you can work this out through the son. He sounds sane and seems to know that his mom is around the bend, at least with cats. I once adopted an abused dog by dealing with a sympathetic daughter in law and everything worked out.

I trap and fix anything I can get my hands on...not that I am saying that you should just go full speed ahead with a crazy neighbor. On occasion, I have trapped females who were already spayed, maybe TNR cats, but they all went home, if they had one, with a shaved tummy and no one ever came to me and asked what happened. However, they may not have connected me to the incident and you are clearly front and center.

I agree that Bella needs to be fixed however you can get to that point. It is very kind of you to deal with this on the behalf of her and her kittens.
 

jefferd18

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That this person has problems does not come as a surprise to me. I hate to bring up the sad truth about cats, but most adults are tickled pink if someone else takes in their unfixed female cat and her kittens.

Please just adopt Bella and if you must communicate with anyone from that family- let it be the son. This woman sounds like she has some serious mental issues that are making her unreasonable. And if she is having problems, she is in no condition to take care of a cat, not to mention, kittens. Bella will be the one to suffer.
 
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