Stepcats

[emelyssa]

Hi there,

My boyfriend and I each have our own house in the same town. I have two lovely 7 year old tabby boys. They are chill and wonderful in every way. My boyfriend has a very high strung female cat, about 3 years old. She is a lone cat. She hates other cats and actually vomits if she sees another cat out the window. She also has behavior problems such as peeing where she is not supposed to (she has three litter pans, btw). His cat loves me and my cats love him, so at least there is that.

The problem is we want to get married and buy a house together. I have always believed that all cats can be socialized if one moves very slowly. However, I have never known a cat like his (and I've had 14 cats in my lifetime).

I don't want our marriage to destroy our cats' lives. And I don't want cat drama to threaten our relationship!!! Any tips?

 

[Kris107]

Well, there are a lot of factors here... When you get any cat, you can't immediately know whether the cat will have behavior issues your not. I'd say what you should look at is, can you "raise" the cats in a similar way? Do you and your boyfriend have similar rules when it comes to the cats? Until you get married and buy a house together - this is all thinking pretty far ahead.

 

[emelyssa]

I am not sure what you mean here by "raising" them. Our cats are established in our respective homes and have been for some time. My question is can a cat who is high strung and hates other cats be socialized with other cats?

 

[Kris107]

Do you have the same "house rules" for the cats? Did you teach yours that hands aren't toys? Did you teach yours to not attack your feet? Does he let his on counters and you don't? Does he wrestle/rough house with his?

 

[emelyssa]

None of this is my concern. I am wondering if it's possible to socialize our cats.