Squee

Moz

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A few people may have seen two posts I made in the cat lounge yesterday. My 11 year old cat, Squee, had chronic lung problems since she was about 3 or 4. She visited the vet yesterday and seemed okay last night, but she took a turn for the worse a few hours ago.

We were able to take her to the vet where she was able to pass away peacefully with my mom and I by her side. :rbheart:

Squee was such a funny cat. I always said she was the least cat-like cat I've ever had, because she never really cared about watching birds through the window, but she certainly loved getting in trouble.

It's weird that I have to talk about her in the past tense, considering she was here less than an hour ago. It's also surreal that I'm making this post - if you went far back enough in my post history, you'd see the post I made the night I got Squee when I was a teenager. I was so excited!

She gave me a lot of laughs and funny memories - so many that I can't even begin to list my favourites - as well as grief when she'd get into trouble, but that's what made Squee, well, Squee. She was notorious for being a troublemaker. Just the other day she thought it would be fun to scratch the screen on my new bedroom window. That was my silly Willy!

Tango and Indy weren't able to say goodbye, though, oddly enough, Indy took time to walk right up to Squee's face and smell her nose this afternoon. This was weird because they never really cuddled or interacted with each other very much. Maybe that was Indy's way of knowing and saying goodbye.

Tango has already been looking for her old buddy. Tango really loved Squee, and so did I. I'm going to miss my crazy girl so much.

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I took this photo of Squee last year.

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From left to right: Squee, Indy, and Tango.
 
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di and bob

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What a beautiful girl, and I'm sure you miss her very much. For 11 years, with your care and love, she managed to live through her lung problems, a testament to what love can do. There comes a time in every living thing's life that it is time to say goodbye, and if we are fortunate we have those we love surround us and give us comfort and the courage to say goodbye.
Squee traveled with you for eleven years , alongside you on the path of your own life's journey. During that journey she developed a bond with your soul, link by link, forged strong with the love you shared. That love can never be taken from you, because love is spiritual, therefore forever. She will never be far from your side, for the new path she follows will always parallel your own, until the day it crosses once more. A love that strong doesn't just disappear with the death, the 'essence' that was your dear Squee will live on forever in your heart and your memories.
Be thankful you got to know that little girl, that she returned your love a hundred fold.She was in your life for a reason and wants you to go forward into the future with joy in your heart, not pain and sorrow, just as you would want for her. because she loves you, and only wants the best for you.
I know the pain of a broken heart. I can assure you that time is the only thing that helps to soften the sharp edge and to bring the happy memories forward to make her life more important than her death. Please know I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers,she is a precious little girl that will be dearly missed. Take care....... RIP sweet Squee. You will never be forgotten, you will have a secure place forever in a loving heart. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!
 
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les26

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I am so sorry for your loss of your little friend, you gave her 7 or 8 "extra" years of living with the lung problems though that she would not have had so you should be proud, but it is always so very tough to lose them at any age. Please try to remember the good times that you shared, and know that she has no health issues now, she is just fine and you will be reunited with her many years down the line and it will be wonderful....

"Their last breath on Earth is their first breath in Heaven" :rbheart:

I hope your heart heals a bit more each day, God Bless......:alright: :grouphug: :rbheart:
 

Mamanyt1953

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Rest you gentle, Squee, dream you deep. You walk in someone's heart forever.

Your love and devotion gave her a long and happy life. I know that she blesses you for that. Love never dies, it only changes form, and she is with you still. Love abides.
 
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Moz

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Thank you all for your kind messages.

The guilt is starting to creep in. It feels like the reason why Squee went downhill so fast was due to her reaction to the liquid antibiotic. She took it fairly well on Thursday night. She spit out a little bit of it, but she swallowed most of it. When it was given to her yesterday morning, she immediately started spitting it out, much more violently than the night before. She walked into one of the bedrooms and I could see that she was struggling to breathe.

She went under a little table outside of that bedroom where she began breathing with her mouth open a little bit for a few minutes. (We called the vet who saw Squee; she said we could switch to a pill version of the same medication, but that idea was scrapped a few minutes later after the vet thought the pill could get stuck in her throat.) After her breathing went back to normal, Squee had a nap, then ate a bit of wet food, then she went and slept behind our TV stand, which is a place where she almost never went. I'd seen her behind there maybe a few times in her entire life. At that moment I thought she was behind there because I (and Tango) kept checking on her and maybe it was bothering her, but now I wonder if that was her attempt at hiding.

After she woke up from sleeping behind the TV stand, she ate her supper. I fed her and went into the bathroom. I guess while I was in the bathroom and after she finished eating, Squee turned around to come back into the living room. She was walking like she was drunk and she suddenly fell over. She laid on the floor for an unknown amount of time (it sounds like it was maybe a minute, at the most) before getting up and continuing to walk like that. That was when I was alerted and a phone call was made to the vet clinic. I was hoping that they could do something for her, maybe give her some oxygen... anything.

I know that medication was prescribed to help her, and we gave it to her to help her, but it makes me feel so guilty feeling that if she hadn't tried to spit it up, that maybe it wouldn't have stressed her lungs out so much that it made it even more difficult for her to breathe, and maybe she still would've been here tonight.

Ugh. I hate this. I knew we made the right choice to prevent any more suffering for Squee, but I can't help but think about what could have been. :(
 
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AbbysMom

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Ugh. I hate this. I knew we made the right choice to prevent any more suffering for Squee, but I can't help but think about what could have been. :(
We ALL think this when a pet dies. I have regrets about my last cat as well, but you really did your best by Squee. Think of the many people that wouldn't have even brought her to the vet. I know it's so easy for me to say and so hard for you to believe, but it's true. :grouphug:

I'm sorry for your loss. So many of the cats from my TCS early days have been leaving us now, Scratch and Squee included. :frown:
 
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Moz

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We ALL think this when a pet dies. I have regrets about my last cat as well, but you really did your best by Squee. Think of the many people that wouldn't have even brought her to the vet. I know it's so easy for me to say and so hard for you to believe, but it's true. :grouphug:
:grouphug2: Thank you.

That's very true.

Last night I was thinking more about it and how we always did the best we could with Squee and her asthma. I'm feeling a little less guilty today, especially after re-reading all of the replies I've received.

My other cats who've passed had illnesses (like cancer and kidney failure) that allowed me to prepare for the end. Since this was so quick, it threw me off and brought so much guilt that I wasn't used to experiencing after a loss.

I'm sorry for your loss. So many of the cats from my TCS early days have been leaving us now, Scratch and Squee included. :frown:
It's definitely sad when that happens. It really feels like you get to know other people's kitties around here, especially when you can read about them year after year. There are so many people from the "old days" who I hope are doing well, too. :crossfingers:
 

Mamanyt1953

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You did all that you could, the best you knew, the best the vet could do. You adored Squee, and Squee returned that. There is no need for guilt, no matter how normal that may be. Sometimes, sadly, the best we have is not enough. Sometimes the best anyone could have is not enough. And that is a reason for sorrow, perhaps regret, but not for guilt, Darlin. Squee knows how hard you tried.
 
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Moz

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Squee's urn is now right beside Scratch's urn. Scratch was Squee's cat soulmate. I think that's exactly what Squee would have wanted. :rbheart:
 

Mamanyt1953

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And I am sure that you are exactly right about that. And I'm also sure that they are chasing butterflies at the Rainbow Bridge together, occasionally peering back so that they don't miss you when it is time for you to join them someday.
 
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Leomc123

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I am sorry for your loss, squee looks so cute. Squee loves you and she will be watching over you every day, she will be walking with you and will be near you all the time. Her soul will be in your heart forever and the bond that you share will always be with you. Tango and Indy are also needing your love as they will also be missing Squee as well :( I know its hard and sudden that Squee has passed on and it is very raw the emotions you are feeling inside. Squee will be looking after Tango and Indy as well she will be there to comfort you, tango and indy in this hard time. And i know Squee right now is in gods arms with his angels comforting squee, in a place where there is peace, immense love and comfort and squee will be playing with all the animals in the world that has passed on, and she will be there waiting for you when its time.
 
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WinniesMomma

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She was adorable. I am so sorry for your loss. I find it is still hard to think of Winnie being gone. Unfortunately I think it takes some time to even get used to that idea.
 

doomsdave

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I've had so many cats and kittens over time, and lost most, the way it is, since we're longer-lived than cats are. And, we don't get eaten by coyotes, at least not that I've heard of.

But the times I had with all of them were lovely, and I remember them fondly. And appreciate the ones I have now.
 
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