You are still very early in your grieving process. It takes at least two years to even come to terms with the pain. You are not alone,though each of us grieves in our own way because each loss is so personal and ours alone. I lost my little girl ten years ago and still cry when i think of her. Its too easy to lose yourelf to the pain, its much harder to learn to live with it. But life is for the living, and i know my Chrissy would want me to be happy. Just as your Sonic wants for you. Hold on to Jakey, he needs you too, just as my three need me. Love is neverending, and our hearts are big enough to share.....