Social cat now terrified of strangers

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Finny used to be the most social cat I've ever met. He loved being in all the action, could be picked up by anyone and he'd start purring. It was honestly a pain in the butt when we needed repairs lol

And now after this whole quarantine thing, he's TERRIFIED of people who aren't me, my mom and brother. He runs and hides the moment anyone he doesn't live with comes over.

My best friend came over to pick me up for work one time and she's never met finny. I brought him up and he clawed out of my arms the second he saw her.

We currently have some men over to fix our sink and I had to bring finny upstairs in a blanket covered carrier just to get him passed the men to my room.

Can lack of exposure to strangers for a few months turn a once social cat into a shy one?

He behaves perfectly normal around me, my mom and brother. Nothing is out of the ordinary until someone he doesn't know comes over.

It makes me sad because he used to be my little social butterfly and now he's so stressed in situations he'd normally thrive in.

Any thoughts? Anyone experience something like this? Any advice on how to help him get back to normal? I'm at a loss :(
 

minish

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How old is finny? Maybe it's the change from kitten to cat.
Some cats take a lot of emotional cues from their caretakers. Maybe you were anxious when strangers came in during the lock down
If possible invite friends over and tell them not to directly engage with finny. As you chat, have a good time, maybe talk about finny in the conversation, it may help with getting accustomed to others again
 
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How old is finny? Maybe it's the change from kitten to cat.
Some cats take a lot of emotional cues from their caretakers. Maybe you were anxious when strangers came in during the lock down
If possible invite friends over and tell them not to directly engage with finny. As you chat, have a good time, maybe talk about finny in the conversation, it may help with getting accustomed to others again
He turned a year in March. No one started coming over until around last month. First it was someone to go over carpet deals and then we had construction in our kitchen (which stressed him out so bad) and then new carpet put in. So alot of construction. But the first person was just there to talk about carpet, so no loud noises.
 

minish

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Minish had no fear and was friendly with anyone until a year old. Then she became very cautious about strangers while she was chill with people who regularly came over. Once there was a loud work in the house (bringing couch parts and assembly) she not only hid above the fridge but also fell behind it. Stayed for hours and grumpy for about 3 days. Probably finny associated strangers with fear because of the noisy experience but I'm sure after a while he will see there is nothing to be afraid.
Since minish had the fright I have locked her in another room before any kind of repair jobs just in case
 
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Minish had no fear and was friendly with anyone until a year old. Then she became very cautious about strangers while she was chill with people who regularly came over. Once there was a loud work in the house (bringing couch parts and assembly) she not only hid above the fridge but also fell behind it. Stayed for hours and grumpy for about 3 days. Probably finny associated strangers with fear because of the noisy experience but I'm sure after a while he will see there is nothing to be afraid.
Since minish had the fright I have locked her in another room before any kind of repair jobs just in case
I'm hoping once my mom gets a steady amount of clients again he will get used to strangers again. I hate seeing him so scared. He's hiding behind my pillow right now.
 

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Hi. It may not be the case, but all it takes is one mean person coming into your house to 'upset the apple cart' for others. Perhaps, one of the people who came in either showed dislike for him or even said something angrily to your cat that scared/frightened him. It's not the same thing, but Feeby used to greet people who came to our house, now she avoids them. I believe it is all because one person who comes to my house a couple of times a year and has no regard for pets of any kind totally disregarded her. I think she could sense that he didn't care much for her presence, and so she obliges him - and, now anyone else who comes to our home.

I would try, as said above, to have friends over who are there just to socialize with you and let Finny do whatever it is that he wants to do. No one is approaching him, and you should be much calmer because it is just a friendly social call. Ideally, after a few times, he will realize it is OK to 'investigate' visitors again.
 
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Hi. It may not be the case, but all it takes is one mean person coming into your house to 'upset the apple cart' for others. Perhaps, one of the people who came in either showed dislike for him or even said something angrily to your cat that scared/frightened him. It's not the same thing, but Feeby used to greet people who came to our house, now she avoids them. I believe it is all because one person who comes to my house a couple of times a year and has no regard for pets of any kind totally disregarded her. I think she could sense that he didn't care much for her presence, and so she obliges him - and, now anyone else who comes to our home.

I would try, as said above, to have friends over who are there just to socialize with you and let Finny do whatever it is that he wants to do. No one is approaching him, and you should be much calmer because it is just a friendly social call. Ideally, after a few times, he will realize it is OK to 'investigate' visitors again.
Maybe, I'm at work all the time so I wasn't there when the first person came over to discuss carpet. My mom said finny ran and hid immediately though.

But I'll give that suggestion a shot.
 

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My cat used to be completely fine with strangers. So fine in fact, that at 5 months old I picked him up from his previous home, and drove him home as the only other other passenger in my car without a carrier. When he came home, he adjusted immediately and settled right in. When my plumber came, I had trouble keeping him away from the sink they were servicing, because he was so curious he kept going under the sink to be part of the action!

Now he's 2 years old (this month!), he is much warier of people and vehicle (not much vehicles out here, just USPS and UPS once a day, lol!). I think it happened after our new neighbors tried to catch him and send him off to the shelter, they had a rope around his neck, like he was some rabid feral. Luckily I was home to hear the commotion and asked them to remove the rope, after which I called my cat, who came obediently over. He didn't seem super fazed by the incident, but that's definitely when he started being less trusting. Now, he shys away from strangers and hides when the deliveries come - he definitely stays away from the neighbor's yard now!

These days he also does the struggle and claw out of my arms thing when a stranger approaches, only he doesn't actually use his claws, because he knows that's a big no-no. I don't really mind the change, he has a great calm personality, so in the past I was constantly worried that he was too trusting for his own good and will get catnapped one-day. I'm more relieved now to think he will not approach an unfamiliar person.

Fortunately he's still a fairly confident kitty, it doesn't take him long to warm up to someone, and he has an amazing memory, once he warms up to a stranger, he will recognize them when they come again, whether it's a few days or a few months later.

Cats definitely change quickly due to a bad experience, usually in the name of self preservation...
Maybe you can have visitors give him treats (or give him treats when visitors come), so that when visitors come, he associate it with a positive experience..I think take it in small positive steps and he'll be able to recover his confidence again.
 

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whoops, double post. not sure how to delete...
 
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My cat used to be completely fine with strangers. So fine in fact, that at 5 months old I picked him up from his previous home, and drove him home as the only other other passenger in my car without a carrier. When he came home, he adjusted immediately and settled right in. When my plumber came, I had trouble keeping him away from the sink they were servicing, because he was so curious he kept going under the sink to be part of the action!

Now he's 2 years old (this month!), he is much warier of people and vehicle (not much vehicles out here, just USPS and UPS once a day, lol!). I think it happened after our new neighbors tried to catch him and send him off to the shelter, they had a rope around his neck, like he was some rabid feral. Luckily I was home to hear the commotion and asked them to remove the rope, after which I called my cat, who came obediently over. He didn't seem super fazed by the incident, but that's definitely when he started being less trusting. Now, he shys away from strangers and hides when the deliveries come - he definitely stays away from the neighbor's yard now!

These days he also does the struggle and claw out of my arms thing when a stranger approaches, only he doesn't actually use his claws, because he knows that's a big no-no. I don't really mind the change, he has a great calm personality, so in the past I was constantly worried that he was too trusting for his own good and will get catnapped one-day. I'm more relieved now to think he will not approach an unfamiliar person.

Fortunately he's still a fairly confident kitty, it doesn't take him long to warm up to someone, and he has an amazing memory, once he warms up to a stranger, he will recognize them when they come again, whether it's a few days or a few months later.

Cats definitely change quickly due to a bad experience, usually in the name of self preservation...
Maybe you can have visitors give him treats (or give him treats when visitors come), so that when visitors come, he associate it with a positive experience..I think take it in small positive steps and he'll be able to recover his confidence again.
I'm sorry your kitty had such a bad experience. That's horrible what those neighbors did. Thankfully finny didn't have a traumatizing experience like that. He just seems to have forgotten that these strangers aren't gonna eat him. Even people he knows but haven't seen since before this quarantine thing happened make him run away.

I'll definitely try the treats. I told my bff the next time she comes over I'll have treats and toys to hopefully win finny over.

This is gonna be a stressful year unfortunately. We've had alot of construction, we're putting the house up for sale sometime next month and will eventually be moving. I bought that stress stopper stuff from Jackson Galaxy in hopes it calms him down during the craziness.
 

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If your cat is nervous you don’t want to pick them up or force them in any way to come near something or someone that they find scary. This just makes them more nervous. Instead you want to let them hide and ignore Them. Sometimes if left alone they calm themselves and may sneak out to observe the scary thing so you can have treats or toys ready. But if they don’t, they don’t. This nervousness may pass over time or not.

My previous cat was a social butterfly who never met a stranger she didn’t love and my current cat is the total opposite. While I feel a little bad that friends and family don’t get to see her and appreciate her the way I do, I never have to worry about her annoying a repair person or sneaking out an open door. And I never have to say sorry and pick her out of a tool box or remove her from someone who clearly doesn’t like or is afraid of cats.
 
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