Seeking help and advice for older feral kittens

catpaw

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About a week ago, I took in four feral kittens who are probably three to four months old at this point, but I cannot keep them forever. My hope was that they could eventually be adopted, but the more I read, the more worried I get about whether this will be possible. They weren't entirely unfamiliar with me when I took them in, as I had been feeding them and their mother on my doorstep since they were born. However, they are definitely feral and have never come close to me. I live in a small apartment with a combined living room/kitchen, a bedroom, and a bathroom. The kittens have been here only about a week and are confined in a cage in my living room that is about three feet wide, three feet tall, and eight feet long. I keep a sheet over it at night but have been leaving a good part of one side exposed when I am home to let them get used to the sight and sound of me moving around. For the first few days, they made good progress and would come to the side of the cage when I brought food. Three of the four were also letting me pet them while they ate, although they were clearly just tolerating it.

Over the past few days, I've made some very stupid mistakes that have set us back. One of the kittens escaped the cage and was loose in the apartment, I made the mistake of catching him, and he is now terrified of me. When he escaped again, I was at a loss and decided to be patient and try to get him back in by waiting until he was hungry and putting food in the cage. That resulted in two of the others' escaping, too. They enjoyed themselves immensely watching the fish in my aquarium and playing together in the living room if I was safely on the couch. They were wary but delighted when I used a cat toy with a ribbon on a wand. I thought this was great, so I allowed the fourth out, too, thinking that I had discovered the secret to making them comfortable. However, they were also overwhelmed by the large space, and they stopped interacting with me and began to hide more and more when I would move around. I became worried that I was having no contact with them at all anymore, so I ended up putting their food in the cage and was able to get them all in and close the door without any trauma. All of this happened over the course of about three days. Since going back in the cage, they have been angry and vocal about wanting out. Tonight, I opened the door to feed them, and all ate next to me at the door, but they all backed up if I tried to touch them. One finally came and pushed next to me, and I instinctively grabbed her, fearing another escape. She hissed and scratched and bit me before I got her back in the cage (I did not let go). However, the interaction was ugly, and I fear I have lost any little trust I had from any of them. I realize now that I should never have tried to catch any of them with my hands, but I can't undo this now.

I am unsure about what to do, going forward. None of the rescues around here seem to have people available to socialize kittens, and I am being encouraged to try to do it myself. However, I am frightened of ending up with four unadoptable cats. I don't know whether to keep these kittens in the pen, or to let them loose in the cottage again--and when to make such a shift. I have seen posts here about using a bathroom, but my bathroom has a hole in the drywall that worries me. I could cover it, but it still makes me nervous. The place overall is small, and I'm wondering if they would eventually come to trust me if we all just lived together. Or do I need to keep them in the cage and try to socialize more gradually with feedings? I would greatly appreciate any ideas you have for how best to move forward. They are dear little cats, but I worry that my inexperience is putting them at risk for failed socialization and an uncertain future. Thanks in advance for any ideas you have for me.
 

tabbytom

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Over the past few days, I've made some very stupid mistakes that have set us back. One of the kittens escaped the cage and was loose in the apartment, I made the mistake of catching him, and he is now terrified of me. When he escaped again, I was at a loss and decided to be patient and try to get him back in by waiting until he was hungry and putting food in the cage. That resulted in two of the others' escaping, too. They enjoyed themselves immensely watching the fish in my aquarium and playing together in the living room if I was safely on the couch. They were wary but delighted when I used a cat toy with a ribbon on a wand. I thought this was great, so I allowed the fourth out, too, thinking that I had discovered the secret to making them comfortable. However, they were also overwhelmed by the large space, and they stopped interacting with me and began to hide more and more when I would move around. I became worried that I was having no contact with them at all anymore, so I ended up putting their food in the cage and was able to get them all in and close the door without any trauma. All of this happened over the course of about three days. Since going back in the cage, they have been angry and vocal about wanting out. Tonight, I opened the door to feed them, and all ate next to me at the door, but they all backed up if I tried to touch them. One finally came and pushed next to me, and I instinctively grabbed her, fearing another escape. She hissed and scratched and bit me before I got her back in the cage (I did not let go). However, the interaction was ugly, and I fear I have lost any little trust I had from any of them. I realize now that I should never have tried to catch any of them with my hands, but I can't undo this now.
:hellosmiley: and welcome to TCS!

Ok, first, don't panic. Firstly, one or two stupid mistakes is not the end of the world. Secondly, kittens are easier to socialise.

Kittens are very inquisitive but their inquisitive behaviour does not last long. Imagine being cooped in the cage all day and once let loose, definitely they'll explore, that's how a kitten behave.

My guess that it'll be better for them to be let out of the cage so that they have more interaction with you. Always associate them with food, be it treats or main meal.
Some kittens are more out going than others and so you may have different kittens warming up to you at different times which is normal.

Please do not go around chasing them and catching them and this will only instil fear in them and they loose trust in you but don;t worry, you can gain back their trust.

Always keep yourself low and not standing up while approaching them. You don't want to appear like a giant and that is very intimidating to them. Make yourself as small as possible. sit on the floor and approach them slowly and no sudden moves. Have a treat or two in your hands and never show them an open palm. Clench your palm into a fist as a fist looks like another cat's head and cats like to head bump.
Always let them make the first move and not the other way round. Do slow eye blinks with them. Leave your clean, unwashed non-perfumes garments with them so that they can soak up your scents.

Don't give up. Remember, love, patience and routine rules the day.

Feel free to ask questions and we'll try our best to guide you. Do show us photos of the kittens if you can.
 

di and bob

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I have made MANY mistakes with ferals, and eventually they all came around. I too, would let them out for stimulation, which kittens badly need. and work on getting them used to your touch while they are eating. They are young enough they will forgive you soon, but this is something you cannot hurry. The bad thing is they will need to be spayed and neutered soon, at about 6 months, and you will have a set back then too. make sure to have FERAL DO NOT TOUCH on the side of the carrier so they don't get loose or bite someone. I have had ferals have kittens as young as 5 months. You will also need to get homes that will have people who understand they will be extra scared and skittish for quite a while.
Sit quietly and read aloud from your phone, leave treats when you go. this will all work out,you'll see, it just takes time and patience!
 
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catpaw

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Thanks so much for your replies! They are immensely helpful, and I have already adjusted some things based on what you both suggested. They do seem more comfortable with a clenched fist (I had actually been waggling fingers, thinking it might be a game), and one of them actually approached to examine it. I did not touch them during their dinnertime tonight, because they all seemed very skittish, but I did sit close by and talk to them while they were eating. Based on the advice both of you gave, I let them out of the cage this evening, and they have been zooming around the house playing ever since. They mostly avoid me, but in their zoomies they come pretty close sometimes, and they really seem startled only when I move toward them, which I am trying not to do. I ate a piece of pizza, and one of them actually approached me, begging. When I gave her a tiny bit of sausage, two more kittens appeared. I am trying to stay small as I can, which is no mean feat for me. I have not been able to touch any of them (and have not really tried) since the grabbing incident. These kitties were spayed/neutered a week ago. There are three girls and one little boy. In contrast to what I have read here about sex and personality of kittens, the boy seems shyest of the four. There is one kitten who is longer-haired and fluffy, and she is clearly the dominant of the four and also appears largest as a result of her coiffure. I tried to sing to them tonight, and one ran behind the aquarium.

This is a wonderful community. Thanks so much for your friendly words and advice.
 

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Mamanyt1953

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Spend a lot of time on the floor with them. Just think about how HUGE AND THREATENING you look to them when standing! I used to read aloud to mine, not making eye contact, just...reading aloud quietly, all while sitting on the floor. BTW...sitting with your legs outstretched is more effective than curled, or crossed, Indian-style. Cats are the most observant little things ever, and they know instinctively that "legs straight out" means you cannot rise and move quickly.
 

tabbytom

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Thanks so much for your replies! They are immensely helpful, and I have already adjusted some things based on what you both suggested. They do seem more comfortable with a clenched fist (I had actually been waggling fingers, thinking it might be a game), and one of them actually approached to examine it. I did not touch them during their dinnertime tonight, because they all seemed very skittish, but I did sit close by and talk to them while they were eating. Based on the advice both of you gave, I let them out of the cage this evening, and they have been zooming around the house playing ever since. They mostly avoid me, but in their zoomies they come pretty close sometimes, and they really seem startled only when I move toward them, which I am trying not to do. I ate a piece of pizza, and one of them actually approached me, begging. When I gave her a tiny bit of sausage, two more kittens appeared. I am trying to stay small as I can, which is no mean feat for me. I have not been able to touch any of them (and have not really tried) since the grabbing incident. These kitties were spayed/neutered a week ago. There are three girls and one little boy. In contrast to what I have read here about sex and personality of kittens, the boy seems shyest of the four. There is one kitten who is longer-haired and fluffy, and she is clearly the dominant of the four and also appears largest as a result of her coiffure. I tried to sing to them tonight, and one ran behind the aquarium.

This is a wonderful community. Thanks so much for your friendly words and advice.
B23897A4-51D3-4BD3-9BCF-7803C930DEA6$L0$001~photo.GIF


Yes, you are doing well. Inspecting your fist is gaining confidence for them. Keep doing this and once their confidence level is up, gently brush their face with the fist. They have to get real used to you. Now they are just checking you out.

I'm so happy to see them playing outside the cage. This will help them integrate tremendously. Interact with them while you are fitted on the floor. Have treats to reward them when they come near and have a toy partially hidden so hat they can come nearer to you and at all times, no sudden moves.
Touching and petting them takes time and don't rush into it. Build up a high trust level first.

Have cat treats standing by while you are eating. if they ask for food, give the cat treat or their food and not yours so that they don't get use to eating and tasting human food.

Sometimes you have to just accept their mischiefs and antics. They are cats after all. For me, I just enjoy the things my boy does but never get angry with him.

BTW, they are beautiful! :hearthrob::redheartpump: Do take more photos of them while they are still young. They grow up very fast.

Do keep us posted of the progress.
 
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catpaw

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I am so excited just by progress this morning! I have been sitting on the floor, as advised, working on my computer and talking while I work. Several kitties have come by and two of them have actually brushed me or stepped on my legs as they passed. The little fluffy kitten has been circling me and staring at me, peeking her head out from behind my monitor, and tilting her head when I talk to her, and she actually just climbed across my body! She is lying next to me right now, with her nose about a centimeter from my arm. The little black kitten is sitting about three feet from me and just staring at all this. The kittens are fascinated by the aquariums, and the fluffy kitten was batting at the fish/glass this morning. They are all active and don't seem very nervous at all. They don't always run anymore, even when I am walking just a few feet from them. They love to sit in the window. They spotted their feral family--mother and two older adolescent siblings (Dad wasn't around this morning) outside, though, and I felt a bit sad at the separation. I did have the older group inside (one at a time) after they were spayed/neutered, but they were all terribly distressed and were released after they recovered. I have a cat tree in a box and may try to put it together later today. Thank you so much for all your replies and suggestions! I'm so glad to have people who understand how exciting this is and to whom I can ask questions!
 

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