scared but in love

Joannie17

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I fell in love with a cat that has been showing up in my backyard. I've been feeding here for a week and just trapped her. Vet tomorrow. My heart is breaking since she seems so sad to be in the trap. I've never had a cat before but I just couldn't let her live outside. I hope I am doing the right thing. Hope she won't hate me cause I'm the one who trapped her. I have a lot to learn. I will take her to the vet in the trap but will bring her home in a hard case. How to get her from the hard case into the big crate? I feel that a crate for a week or so might be best.
 

mani

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Your thread title went straight to my heart.. how lovely that you are taking this girl on. I'm going to move this to our 'caring for strays and ferals' forum as there are people there who would love to help you on this adventure. 💗
 
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Joannie17

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Your thread title went straight to my heart.. how lovely that you are taking this girl on. I'm going to move this to our 'caring for strays and ferals' forum as there are people there who would love to help you on this adventure. 💗
Thank you. Scary, but I hope she will be happy. I don’t know what I’m doing😬
 

tabbytom

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I fell in love with a cat that has been showing up in my backyard. I've been feeding here for a week and just trapped her. Vet tomorrow. My heart is breaking since she seems so sad to be in the trap. I've never had a cat before but I just couldn't let her live outside. I hope I am doing the right thing. Hope she won't hate me cause I'm the one who trapped her. I have a lot to learn. I will take her to the vet in the trap but will bring her home in a hard case. How to get her from the hard case into the big crate? I feel that a crate for a week or so might be best.
:hellosmiley: Joannie, welcome to TCS!

Thank you for taking in this kitty and for giving her a warm and fur-ever loving home and a safe sanctuary to live out her life :clapcat:

You are doing the right thing and I'm sure the cat won't hate you for that. It just take some time for her for adjustments and getting used to you and the environment. It may seem hard in the beginning but don't give up. We are here to help you.

Do it step by step since this is your first time having a cat. Just don't rush through the whole transition.

Is there a spare room that you have rather than use the cage? If the cage is the only option, then the day you bring her back from the vet, open the cage door and place the carrier with the opening partly inside the cage. If the cage is big enough, maybe leave the whole carrier inside the cage for the time being.
Once the carrier is somewhat partly in the cage, open the carrier and let the cat out and quickly close the cage door.

You also need to place a litterbox in he cage away from her food and water. Visit her often and don't just leave her alone in the cage all the time. Interact with her and leave one or two pieces of your clean non-perfumed unwashed garments and leave them in the cage with her so that she can can use to your scents and be comforted by the scents. Also prepare some towels for her so that her scents may be transferred to the towels so that in the week or weeks to come when you let her out of the cage, you can use the towels that has her scents and place it around the room or house rot that there is familiar scents and she don't feel so spooked out. You can do likewise with your garments too.

Please feel free to ask questions as there are no such thing as a stupid question. Like I mentioned earlier, we are here to help you so if you have any questions, just shoot.
 

Jcatbird

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You havedrawn more than the love of a kitty to you. You have brought many of us who have shared the same feelings and experience. You have our hearts as well. You will find many of us who will bevy your side whenever you have a question, concern or need. Getting her from the hard carrier to the crate? Can you put the door of the carrier just inside the crate and open it towards the back of the crate? She is likely to either dash towards the back and away from your hands or try to slip past you but the first option is more common. Make sure you are in a room with a closed door when you transfer her. If you have a piece of stuff cardboard bear to hand you can pull the carrier out and block the crate door until you close it. A blanket can work to block her too. You can also put a yummy bit of food beside the back of the crate to tempt her in that direction. Just be aware of her as you open the carrier. She may hesitate to move out to. If the carrier is small enough, you can leave it inside the crate as a small hiding cave for now. If she is very nervous at first, use a light sheet to drape over the crate to make her feel more secure. You can gradually fold it back as she becomes more relaxed. There is a process that many of us use to help kitties as they adjust but you are very well along the way already. She loves you and trusts you. That is the beginning of a lasting and amazing relationship! Your first kitty? Congratulations! You have a bond that many only dream of having. Thank you so much for giving her a safe home. You have just saved a life! :clap2::goldstar::heartshape:Every kitty guardian is a kitty hero. Please do keep us updated.
 

fionasmom

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Thank you for helping this cat. I have only ever brought strays or ferals in as pets and it absolutely can be done. My avatar, currently sleeping on the bed, was part of a feral litter born under a house on my street. You can get a lot of help here as you work through the stages of making her an indoor pet.
 

dustydiamond1

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:hithere::welcomesign:Almost 5 years ago the former neighborhood stray decided to allow us to become her beloved minions. We had no experience with a cat let alone an indoor one. I was researching how to handle things and found the needed information and support here on TCS and you will too. Just be very patient, don't get discouraged and let her set the pace (to a certain extent) Don't allow yourself to feel guilty if she acts unhappy. That will change and she is safer inside with you and will come around. How are things going? We love lots of photos so don't be shy about posting. :hangin::vibes::vibes::vibes::catrub:
 

kittychick

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Nobody laugh —- I SO want to keep this short….but see my willpower slipping … :flail:

First —- YEAH to you for not just caring but taking ACTION that’ll make for a complete life change for this kitten - and you! GO YOU!!!:cheerleader::rock:

Second — you’ve already gotten great advice from some really seasoned members!!!!!

Some tips I think I’m too late for, but I’ll give them anyway — anytime I have a kitty in a trap OR a carrier, I cover it completely (use a light blanket or sheet so kitty can breathe!!!). Top, all sides, front & back should be covered - kitty’ll feel safer in car, at Clinic & for ride home. Definitely lowers kitty (& Driver!) blood pressure. 🐈⬛


🐈 TIP (prob too late): Many vets/clinics here charge far less if cat coming to be fixed is feral/antisocial stray AND: 1. comes in a humane trap to be fixed, 2. letting them be eartipped & 3. Leaves in same trap. IF $ doesn’t matter & IF (and ONLY if) kitty will be 100% inside, I’d ask vet not to eartip, and take kitty home in a nice carrier (& leave trap in your trunk!).

Since it sounds like you’re not sure how house-knowledgable she is —- I’ll tell you a bit about the beginning of how I do things (usually-but there are always variables!). Site members do many things a bit differently— but that’s what’s great here is you’ll find people who can help in almost any way you feel comfortable!

Best kind of room, if possible, is a quiet room (we use a large unused guest room) that can be closed off for the time-being - it’s her “safe room.” I’d take her straight to that room first, not let her see around the house yet, or meet other pets or pe pool. (her world will get bigger before you know it so best to keep things simple at first :) but her world will get bigger quickly….in a few days…few weeks….. however long feels right)….limit her to “her room” she’

When we bring a new foster or TNR kitty home, we have the room ready to go before we get home. We use a huge wire Great Dane crate to start—we cover it completely w/a big sheet or 2, leaving front part of crate only part exposed). And of course already have all she needs in her “temporary digs” like bowls, litterbox, etc. So then all you need to is put kitty IN her carrier at the back of the crate (w/carrier door closed!) We then use 2 people: one of us is inside crate w/carrier door shut, other of us is outside large crate, w/a broom handle -or similar- (that we’d pre-tested to make sure it fits thru the crate wires)! Inside, I unlatch the carrier, while hubby still holds carrier door shut until I back out of the crate. After crate’s shut & FIRMLY latched, use the broom handle to let carrier door swing open, & latch it open by twisting the door to side of wire crate.

Know we’re here to help you! No question is dopey! And keep us posted — want to hear how things go!!!!!!!!!!!
 

dustydiamond1

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:clap::clap2: :cheerleader::goldstar:We are very happy she is progressing so well .:dance:What is her name? How old did the vet think she is? She's so pretty. Just remember, patience, patience and that the only dumb question is the one not asked! If you can't find what you need to know in the forums just ask here or even start a new thread. Keep us updated, I love her in your avatar, Mine is Gypsy soon after she started coming inside, before she shared her name.:vibes::vibes::bouquet:
 
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Joannie17

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Hi. Thanks for checking in. She is doing ok. She only lets us touch her when in her bed. Otherwise she tries to swat at us or grabs our hands. It’s been over 3 weeks, she seems comfortable, always hungry. I need to have her spayed. Hopefully she will become friendlier. Doesn’t hiss or bite.
 

dustydiamond1

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From what I've heard spaying will help calm her down, it may take awhile for her hormones to fade afterwards. Have you tried brushing rather than petting? That's the first way Gypsy let us do anything with her when she was still outside. Seems I remember a member on here used a glove tied on a ruler to pet their feral/stray. After almost 5 years Gypsy still usually has to be in one of her box lids (numerous cat beds, soft cushions etc.. and she prefers box lids with a plastic bag in it.. not the boxes just lids. I guess she likes to see what's going on around her) for us to pet, cuddle and massage her otherwise she just gets up and leaves. I'm teaching her to lay on my chest by patting it, saying 'up' to get her up there then placing my hand on her back and gently pressing while saying 'down' then once she's lying comfortably place a treat in front of her then I stroke her and calmly tell her what a good girl she is for a few minutes til she decides to step off. Always leave your girl an escape, don't try to hold her yet. It took several months for Gypsy to let us know her name after she decided to stop being the neighborhood stray and adopt us. Three weeks in a cats life isn't any time at all, stay patient. Not sure why she's always hungry. Whenallhellbreakslose Whenallhellbreakslose any suggestions?
you are doing great. Try not to get impatient.
:hangin: :vibes: :vibes: :vibes: :vibes: :catrub: :touched:

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Whenallhellbreakslose

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Hello. So the feral kitty is settling in and allowing you to pet her--but only when she lies on the bed? That is a good start! The fact she is okay with you petting her at all is a good sign. I alway say when you bring a cat from the outside in, always meet them on their terms. The fact she only allows you to pet her while in the bed is her terms (at least for now). Hopefully as she grows more comfortable in the home, she will let you pet her more and more. Outdoor cats are use to keeping there guard up because they have to deal with other cats and predators who may want to fight them or worse, on top of the threat of "stranger danger" with humans. Keep showing this cat, she can trust you. Speak to her in a gentle voice, praise her, give her treats, etc. You could brush her fur, but only if she allows it. I have used the brush mitt on semi ferals and some liked it, others not so much. So once again don't push anything she is not ready for or does not like at all.

Keep a routine with her with feeding, play and other activities. Cats deal a lot better with routines as they are creatures of habit. It makes them feel more comfortable dealing with something they are use to. They could get too over stimulated with too much being pushed on them. Perhaps you could look into calming sprays or treats to keep her at her calmest. Please get her spayed as soon as possible. A cat in heat can be very loud, annoying and frisky-- you don't want to deal with that with a half socialized cat. She may calm down after being spayed. I have seen cats who calmed down a lot and cats who didn't after being spayed. It may put an end to sexual based behavior, but a rambunctious or high- strung cat may not change that much--at that point you are dealing with personality, energy levels , possible behavioral problems, and in the case of high-strungness a very nervous cat. Because your cat was taken from the streets and is just getting socialized, it is not at all surprising. The socialization process takes much longer than kittens of socialization age, so please keep that in mind. Be patient. You will just have to earn her trust and that may take time.

Thank you for taking this kitty in. There have been plenty of examples of socialized semi-ferals. I feed outdoor cats and have petted quite a few and almost never been bitten or scratch because I earned the cat's trust. I would never have petted them, if I thought they would react hostile. I would love to get homes for these cats, but it is a bit difficult right now. Thank goodness there are people like you out there. You are a hero to this cat. Thank you once again for taking her in.🙂
 
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