Remembering Krista

tarasgirl06

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 19, 2006
Messages
24,708
Purraise
64,894
Location
Glendale, CATifornia
The sad and guilty truth is that I did know the fish flakes were no good for her. Sometime last year I correlated head shaking and other GI stuff with the flakes and stopped giving them. Before she was taking the chemo, I could convince her to join me in the office with the door shut for our nightly pred wrestling match. Then she could have her raw food dinner as a treat. She loved that food so much that she consented (but did not submit so easily) to that routine. When she started chemo, I felt hesitant to continue the raw with her immune system being actively suppressed. This is when I switched to the “devil’s bargain.” I knew the flakes weren’t the best for her. But she needed to take her medicine and our options were limited. She wasn’t going to consent to a nightly wrestling match for just a plate of regular food. I mentioned my concern to her doctor but he didn’t have any answer for me about whether using a small amount of a known trigger to get her to self medicate was detrimental. I didn’t get that answer until her ear surgery forced us to rethink the nightly routine and switch to the transdermal wet willy. All her poop nonsense stopped! For as bad as I feel for how long I prevented her remission, I am grateful and relieved that her final month or two she did enjoy a remission and had the most perfect poops this side of raw.

I was overworked, under-sleeping, and not thinking straight in her last year. I was throwing everything against the wall to see what stuck. And I wasn’t getting any good answers from her vet except, “maybe increase her pred dose?” 🤦🏼‍♂️

I know spending thought or feelings on this now doesn’t change the outcome. But it still haunts me from time to time.
I know. And you can't undo any of that. But you've filed it away. And that's both a bad thing and maybe, somehow, a good thing, too. Because we just never know when information is needed.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #443

daftcat75

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 7, 2018
Messages
12,642
Purraise
25,128
Fun thought of the day:

Cabbie was pts at 8 years old.

Krista lived to 16.

If the pattern holds, NC should live over 30 years!

😹 😻
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #448

daftcat75

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 7, 2018
Messages
12,642
Purraise
25,128
November 19, 2019

Krista thinking those deep thoughts again.
2EE8356C-C542-40A3-8CAF-ACA96F6878B2.jpeg
Like “don’t stop!” 😻😹
8E956870-DDA0-4F24-B6B8-F7BF779D92DC.jpeg


I think I erected a shield or barrier so I could keep her out of dinner. A common practice since I relented on the tabletop and desktop ban.
48B672F1-7C1F-4D40-B331-315EA15A585E.jpeg

"Whatchoo got there? Is that tuna?"
"Yes. Yes it is and you can’t have any!"

Ahi Tuna burger. Mmm. That sounds really good for lunch today!
D80B7A78-5D83-49F7-A8D8-9B22009F8D54.jpeg
 
Last edited:

tarasgirl06

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 19, 2006
Messages
24,708
Purraise
64,894
Location
Glendale, CATifornia
November 19, 2019

Krista thinking those deep thoughts again.
View attachment 359278
Like “don’t stop!” 😻😹
View attachment 359279


I think I erected a shield or barrier so I could keep her out of dinner. A common practice since I relented on the tabletop and desktop ban.
View attachment 359280

"Whatchoo got there? Is that tuna?"
"Yes. Yes it is and you can’t have any!"

Ahi Tuna burger. Mmm. That sounds really good for lunch today!
View attachment 359281
*But DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!* :kneading:*I WANT! I WANT! I WANT! (This is one big reason why I don't eat at the keyboard anymore.)
What a beautiful little face. IDK how you could be so hardhearted. :insertevillaugh:
 

MissClouseau

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Feb 20, 2019
Messages
1,733
Purraise
2,126
Location
Istanbul, Turkey
The sad and guilty truth is that I did know the fish flakes were no good for her. Sometime last year I correlated head shaking and other GI stuff with the flakes and stopped giving them. Before she was taking the chemo, I could convince her to join me in the office with the door shut for our nightly pred wrestling match. Then she could have her raw food dinner as a treat. She loved that food so much that she consented (but did not submit so easily) to that routine. When she started chemo, I felt hesitant to continue the raw with her immune system being actively suppressed. This is when I switched to the “devil’s bargain.” I knew the flakes weren’t the best for her. But she needed to take her medicine and our options were limited. She wasn’t going to consent to a nightly wrestling match for just a plate of regular food. I mentioned my concern to her doctor but he didn’t have any answer for me about whether using a small amount of a known trigger to get her to self medicate was detrimental. I didn’t get that answer until her ear surgery forced us to rethink the nightly routine and switch to the transdermal wet willy. All her poop nonsense stopped! For as bad as I feel for how long I prevented her remission, I am grateful and relieved that her final month or two she did enjoy a remission and had the most perfect poops this side of raw.

I was overworked, under-sleeping, and not thinking straight in her last year. I was throwing everything against the wall to see what stuck. And I wasn’t getting any good answers from her vet except, “maybe increase her pred dose?” 🤦🏼‍♂️

I know spending thought or feelings on this now doesn’t change the outcome. But it still haunts me from time to time.
If I may share my personal opinion because I just talked about this with a friend on the phone too, I give free pass to the elderly when they are in the late years of their senior years. I really, really love sweet baked goods a lot myself right. I would rather still enjoy them when I'm old than to live a few longer years. My philosophy is that we all live once and I don't find it right to prevent someone from doing something they love and maybe can never do again. It almost feels selfish. Like I watched my late dog like a hawk all his life, protecting him from everything I could. But by the time I knew he only had couple more years at most realistically, he got a free pass for all the treats, foods, etc if it wasn't going to take him to the ER. I did clean some diarrhea, yes. Now with my mom I make less and less comments about her unhealthy habits that she loves.

If I were you, I would probably give the fish flakes too.
 

tarasgirl06

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 19, 2006
Messages
24,708
Purraise
64,894
Location
Glendale, CATifornia
*Agree with you 100%, MissClouseau MissClouseau -- our physical bodies are only the houses for our souls. They are temporary and they are not meant to last forever, contrary to what some may think. If we are comfortable or even happy with our own lifestyle choices, that's great. Actually I feel really good about adopting a good diet after not doing this in the past. But for someone in our care who is going to be leaving us shortly, I also think it's very important to allow them some latitude. That doesn't mean letting them eat junk all the time. But if they want some sweets from time to time, or something else they love, let them have it! *And those fish flakes are very pure, good, healthy food for cats. Most cats.*
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #457

daftcat75

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 7, 2018
Messages
12,642
Purraise
25,128
I believe there is a difference between allowing an old person their daily vice vs administering a cat’s IBD/lymphoma medicine with a known allergen/trigger food. It would be like giving insulin in a sugar solution. I should have known better. I did know better. Back in 2019, I knew the flakes were problematic. That’s why we stopped the fish flake hunts which she adored so so much! If there was going to be a pawspice period where I knew her days were limited, we would have gone back to that. But we were still trying to achieve remission. We were so close. All that poop nonsense and poop barfs that could have been prevented. I didn’t get any good guidance from my vets on this one either. My new vet didn’t even want to give her the chemo without a biopsy. Her boss relented. He understood the diagnosis was riskier than the drug for Krista. But even him, when I asked about the poop nonsense and poop pukes, his only answer was maybe she needs more pred. The middle ear infection she got, probably from built up reaction to flakes every night with her medicine was actually a blessing in disguise. It forced us to change the pred routine and that’s when she finally achieved remission. I’ll never know how much of a difference remission would have made. But all that poop nonsense and poop puking was avoidable. We could have found other ways to tickle her vices if we weren’t wasting so much time, effort, and grief trying to put out her gut fire with tuna kerosene. I would have loved to have gotten back to making her homemade rabbit food. I was also looking forward to trying turkey with her again once she was stable and gaining weight again. She loved turkey! She had more vices than fish flakes. I try not to dwell on this much. Because whether I’m right or wrong on this, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t change the outcome. It doesn’t remove a minute of her suffering or give her a minute more with me. 😿
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #458

daftcat75

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 7, 2018
Messages
12,642
Purraise
25,128
I’m thinking about getting a robot vacuum as a soft entry back into animal care. I know it will be underfoot. I know it will get into trouble. I know it will create a mess at least once. I know I will have to clean up after it—empty its receptacle. But maybe it will help me out around the home with chores—just one but hopefully it will do a good job. And it should provide entertainment and companionship. But I’ll be damned if I share my bed. I sleep sideways, diagonal, and starfish for as late as I like every morning. 👍😹
 

tarasgirl06

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 19, 2006
Messages
24,708
Purraise
64,894
Location
Glendale, CATifornia
I’m thinking about getting a robot vacuum as a soft entry back into animal care. I know it will be underfoot. I know it will get into trouble. I know it will create a mess at least once. I know I will have to clean up after it—empty its receptacle. But maybe it will help me out around the home with chores—just one but hopefully it will do a good job. And it should provide entertainment and companionship. But I’ll be damned if I share my bed. I sleep sideways, diagonal, and starfish for as late as I like every morning. 👍😹
Get it get it GET IT!!! *And I wouldn't sleep with it, either. I have to sleep with cats. I can't sleep without cats. And somehow, I don't think cats would like a robotic vacuum in their bed.* *I meant no offense by my post about the fish flakes, and you're absolutely right in your and Krista's case.*
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #460

daftcat75

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 7, 2018
Messages
12,642
Purraise
25,128
Oh wow! I used Settings-Accessibility-Touch to access my flashlight. *Exciting, huh?* because by the time I finish work, it's dark now and I have to navigate a dark hall with turns and then turn on lights in the master bedroom, wherein are cats, or the kitchen, wherein is cat food. That must be amazing to be able to bring Krista's voice up with a tap! I may do that with a Tarifa meow. Or maybe not. Because I'm a very emotional person.
Headlamp!

I’ve been trying for a week to remember to tell you something. I got myself a headlamp that also has a red light setting a couple years ago so that I could navigate my apartment at night without blinding cat or disturbing my night vision. Handsfree, phone free, no fuss. Or cleaning the cat box in the middle of the night. Or like this morning, to provide extra handsfree light for projects like rewiring the entertainment center and “server room” (the three small form factor servers that used to be on top of the bench instead of inside it.) I have a ton of home improvement projects ahead of me to improve home for me. But also to get out ahead of the next cat. Like moving cables and servers out of mischief’s reach. 😼

But yes. The flash light is a great use for the back tap.

And yes. It is still a great comfort to have Krista’s voice two or three taps away. I could almost always illicit a trill from her by simply touching her. I called it her trill button. And I knew I was going to miss that so much. So it’s beautiful in a Dark Mirror kind of way that I can reach across the void and still press that trill button. 😻 It’s also surprising and amusing when I sometimes accidentally trigger it by setting down the phone. 😹😻
 
Last edited:
Top