Remembering Krista

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daftcat75

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A toothy, fang-y Krista! So cute. I really like the bottom pic. Adorable. Red was a really nice color to show off HER colors, too.
Yeah, it's so important that we record our loved ones! I wish I had more videos, too -- but because I told myself that I sucked at videos, I haven't made many until recently, when I decided to become determined to hold the phone as steady as possible and not care if my videos weren't professional quality. After all, they're for me, not Spielberg, right? ;)
When video is all you have left, I promise you that you won't mind if the sound is off or the picture shakes. I seriously considered getting a GoPro to record more candid footage of Krista. NC (next cat) won't have any privacy!
 

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When video is all you have left, I promise you that you won't mind if the sound is off or the picture shakes. I seriously considered getting a GoPro to record more candid footage of Krista. NC (next cat) won't have any privacy!
I know. I look at my videos of Tarifa almost daily. I love to hear her voice. I play these for Elvis, too, and he knows her voice. Sometimes people don't have the patience to view others' photos, videos, home movies etc., but WE DO. They are so precious to us.
 
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I know. I look at my videos of Tarifa almost daily. I love to hear her voice. I play these for Elvis, too, and he knows her voice. Sometimes people don't have the patience to view others' photos, videos, home movies etc., but WE DO. They are so precious to us.
I took pictures of Krista almost everyday and certainly every week last year. Part of what's helping me feel a little less lonely right now is looking back through media from this general period of time across the years (mostly the last two.) Next month will be bittersweet as we go back to Santa Rosa for her two dentist visits. I had hoped we would do more road trips after remission if she could have put back some weight. I would have loved more Krista on hotel fridge pictures. 😹 😻
 

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I took pictures of Krista almost everyday and certainly every week last year. Part of what's helping me feel a little less lonely right now is looking back through media from this general period of time across the years (mostly the last two.) Next month will be bittersweet as we go back to Santa Rosa for her two dentist visits. I had hoped we would do more road trips after remission if she could have put back some weight. I would have loved more Krista on hotel fridge pictures. 😹 😻
I do that too. I change my PC and phone wallpapers to photos at the same general time in past years, mostly; but right now I just have very recent pictures of Tarifa up. Sometimes I wish for VR of her, and so many others, and that I could just spend a lot of hours every day there.
 
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September 26, 2018

I went back through my food journal to remind myself how she was doing back then. It appears we tried both Rawz and Rad Cat this week in 2018. This would be when we started to truly turn the corner on her IBD and pancreatitis. Before these two foods it was Fancy Feast, Tiki Cat, and Tiki Cat Velvet Mousse. The Moussening! Mousse in, Mousse out! 🤦🏼‍♂️ She was about 7 lbs here. And we were still struggling with food intake. But after Rawz and Rad Cat introduced this week, it all got better until her next teeth episode. If Rad Cat was still with us, I’m confident Krista would be too.😿

Krista was never interested in this busy box until I put a fish flake inside it.😼

https://thecatsite.com/media/fish-flake-busy-box.423758/
 

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daftcat75

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This is the equivalent of having voicemails from the recently deceased. Krista is on the previews of two cameras that I have not had a reason to look at since before she passed. 😿🤧
F29C91DD-1F43-4498-B4C9-625A75F98D49.png
 
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Inaccessible via desktop. :hearthrob::kneading::hearthrob: Glad you have them!
Changed to include image in thread. The previews are too small to provide any real comfort. They’re more like ghosts. But I still don’t have occasion to view those cameras. So why change the previews just yet?
 
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daftcat75

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Mostly there isn't tears or pain anymore. Just emotional landmines of sadness. It isn't crying at my desk anymore or getting misty at a tender thought. (Not as much or strongly anyway.) It's just sad. A million little things remind me of her and the holes left behind. It doesn't seem dark and hopeless as much as sad that I won't see her again. Not on this plane. I can look at pictures and videos, and remember the joy and the love. But still the sad is always there. I hope that will fade with time as the pain is fading. Because, gosh! That face and those goofy and endearing antics of hers! I don't always want the joy and love to be mixed with this heavy sadness.
 
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Mostly there isn't tears or pain anymore. Just emotional landmines of sadness. It isn't crying at my desk anymore or getting misty at a tender thought. (Not as much or strongly anyway.) It's just sad. A million little things remind me of her and the holes left behind. It doesn't seem dark and hopeless as much as sad that I won't see her again. Not on this plane. I can look at pictures and videos, and remember the joy and the love. But still the sad is always there. I hope that will fade with time as the pain is fading. Because, gosh! That face and those goofy and endearing antics of hers! I don't always want the joy and love to be mixed with this heavy sadness.
True. Each of us experiences our own personal grief *and joy* but in my experience, there is always a feeling of loss in conjunction with the joy of having been privileged to share life with my beloved Tarifa and each of my loved ones. I'll always miss them until I am with them once again. But would I trade any of it? Never. I look at the photos and treasure the beauty and sweetness. I watch the videos and chuckle, and then I miss her so much.
 
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True. Each of us experiences our own personal grief *and joy* but in my experience, there is always a feeling of loss in conjunction with the joy of having been privileged to share life with my beloved Tarifa and each of my loved ones. I'll always miss them until I am with them once again. But would I trade any of it? Never. I look at the photos and treasure the beauty and sweetness. I watch the videos and chuckle, and then I miss her so much.
I understand I’ll always miss her. I still miss Cabbie. But it doesn’t hurt or make me sad to think of Cabbie anymore. Well, sad that I can’t remember much of her. But that’s a different issue. And a much softer sadness. I guess there’s still a lot of pain to feel around Krista’s passing. But I’ve entered a new stage where its release is not so readily and easily accessible. 😔 It’s gone from a tissue paper bag of tears—doesn’t take many to break it open—to the thin stretched opening of a balloon barely letting anything escape. That awful sound, if it had a corporeal feeling, that’s what springs up in my heart when I think about Krista now. The love and joy is there. But a grinding sadness is also still there. It’s more powerful than just missing her.

This just takes time to dull the pain. 😔😿🤧
 
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tarasgirl06

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I understand I’ll always miss her. I still miss Cabbie. But it doesn’t hurt or make me sad to think of Cabbie anymore. Well, sad that I can’t remember much of her. But that’s a different issue. And a much softer sadness. I guess there’s still a lot of pain to feel around Krista’s passing. But I’ve entered a new stage where it’s release is not so readily and easily accessible. 😔 It’s gone from a tissue paper bag of tears—doesn’t take many to break it open—to the thin stretched opening of a balloon barely letting anything escape. That awful sound, if it had a corporeal feeling, that’s what springs up in my heart when I think about Krista now. The love and joy is there. But a grinding sadness is also still there. It’s more powerful than just missing her.

This just takes time to dull the pain. 😔😿🤧
Yeah. And in my experience anyway, there comes a time when most of the sharpness is dulled. But never all of it.
 
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I don’t do Facebook anymore and never did Twitter. I follow cats on Instagram. Much kinder feed. No politics. 😹

This is one adorable night fury! She’s doing the paw thing Krista used to do. I needed to see this to be reminded. 😻

 
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