Question of the Day, Sunday the 23rd of February, 2020

[Mia6]

Hello and Happy Sunday!!

What were some of your worst faux pas? Or just one. Where you wish you could just disappear?

Once I called the police because I thought someone had broken in and stolen my hand bag. At that point in time, my slider didn't lock and I hadn't put the stick in, so anyone could've come in. He asked where did you last see it, blah, blah, blah. The handbag was black. Within about three minutes he shined his flashlight in a corner and there it was, in the corner where I kept it so I could take it upstairs for the night. I felt sooo foolish but he was very kind.

What are some of yours?

 

[jcat]

Back when I first started dating my husband, my German left a lot to be desired. We went out with a group of his friends - most of whom I was meeting for the first time - and I overheard part of a conversation at the next table. There was a word being used that I'd never heard before, so I asked what it meant. It was a very vulgar word describing part of female anatomy, so my query was met with astonished silence followed by hysterical laughter. As it turned out, one of his friends knew the equally vulgar English equivalent and told me. My husband picked up a German porn novel after that and told me to read it and ask him about words I didn't know - in private.

 

[verna davies]

My most recent was thursday. I took a short cut to get to the library, stood on a small wall and stepped over to the lane the other side. My ankle turned over and I went down like a sack of spuds onto a gravel lane banging my face, knee and hands. My glasses flew off and things fell out of my bag. I lay there using extremely bad language and lots of it when a voice said "are you ok". Oops I must remember to think it next time and not say it aloud.

 

[Mia6]

My husband picked up a German porn novel after that and told me to read it and ask him about words I didn't know - in private.

Sounds very, very fun!!!

 

[jcat]

Sounds very, very fun!!!

When I was teaching English here I had an elective "What not to say...." lesson for my classes every semester so they didn't find themselves in the same situation. You never saw more attentive students!

 

[maggiedemi]

My entire early twenties when I was just drunk all the time and acting ridiculous. You know that saying "Youth is wasted on the young"? Wish I could have those years back and do more with them.

 

[susanm9006]

When I started using a memory typewriter (pre computer) to do form letters at work I sent out a huge stack to the “Department of Pubic Safety”. Probably the other is catching the “love” virus on my work computer which then sent an email headed “I Love You” along with the virus itself to everyone in my very long business contact list.

 

[neely]

My family will never let me forget our visit to Madame Tussads House of Wax in London. There was a wax figure behind a desk at the entrance to an exhibit and it looked so realistic that I walked up to it and asked if we had to pay to enter. Needless to say my family stood back and was laughing hysterically at me - they still talk about it to this day.

 

[EmersonandEvie]

I can tell my favorite one from when my grandmother was much younger...

She was a receptionist at the county courthouse in the 1960s. Part of her job was dealing with people wanting to obtain different licenses, certificates, etc. One day, a couple came in with a baby who was the spitting image of the man. They were getting a marriage license. While she was typing it up, she commented something like, "Oh, look at that handsome little boy! No question who his daddy is" and the guy replied, deadpan, "yes, that's why we are getting the license." Cue my grandmother wanting to crawl under a rock and finishing the license application in record time

 

[Mia6]

When I started using a memory typewriter (pre computer) to do form letters at work I sent out a huge stack to the “Department of Pubic Safety”. Probably the other is catching the “love” virus on my work computer which then sent an email headed “I Love You” along with the virus itself to everyone in my very long business contact list.

Pubic,

 

[susanm9006]

Pubic,

I know. But it was the 70’s then and we probably could have used one.

 

[Mia6]

I know. But it was the 70’s then and we probably could have used one.

LMAO!!!!

 

[MonaLyssa33]

In high school, I was talking with my band teacher alone in his office and I let rip a silent-but-deadly body function not expecting it to be that way. He was the only other person in the room so I couldn't blame it on anyone else. It didn't help that I also had an innocent crush on the guy. Yeah, I was pretty mortified.

 

[aliceneko]

Too many to note!

 

[Tik cat's mum]

This is really bad I was talking to a ex of mine and called him by my first husband's name But that's never going to happen again my now husband has the same name.

 

[Silver Crazy]

Well...this morning instead of getting ready for work I was reading TCS, jumped up realising I was running late, had a rushed shower, got half dressed and sprayed air freshener instead of deodorant under my arms.So gonna be late!!!

 

[Elphaba09]

I put myself through school by working at a restaurant where I started off as a server. When we walked up to tables, we had two options for table introductions after "Hi, my name is Blah Blah. I am going to be your server today. Those options were "Can I start you off with some [insert appetizer]" and "Can I get you any [insert appetizer]." Now, combine the two by removing "start" and adding "get" to the first option and using "cheese sticks" for the appetizer. Thankfully, they just laughed it off.

 

[Mia6]

In high school, I was talking with my band teacher alone in his office and I let rip a silent-but-deadly body function not expecting it to be that way. He was the only other person in the room so I couldn't blame it on anyone else. It didn't help that I also had an innocent crush on the guy. Yeah, I was pretty mortified.

Oh my!!! That is a great one, the SBDs are deadly, ha!!!! Did he say anything?? I most spewed tea
on my keyboard, hee, hee

 

[Winchester]

Well...this morning instead of getting ready for work I was reading TCS, jumped up realising I was running late, had a rushed shower, got half dressed and sprayed air freshener instead of deodorant under my arms.So gonna be late!!!

I did almost the same thing one afternoon. I had taken a shower and was getting ready for work. I was in a real hurry that afternoon and was pushing it. Grabbed a can of Indoor NO! and sprayed my hair. Stood there wondering why there was white foam on my hair. And kept spraying! And then, it finally hit me. Swearing loudly (it was just me in the house), I got down, bent over the bathtub and re-washed my hair, dried it with the hair dryer and took off. You never saw somebody move so fast. I made it to work with one minute to spare.

Indoor NO! was a can of cat repellent that was supposed to stop cats from peeing in the house. It never worked.

Oh, and then there was the time when a GF and I were coming from a bar around 1:30 in the morning. We were driving through time and she yelled, "The light's green!" and I squealed on the brakes to stop. When the light turned red, I drove through. She started laughing and I had no idea what was so funny. Then she told me. We were drunk and we were high; thankfully, no cops saw us. That was back in my way younger days. Sometimes, thinking back, I wonder how in the world I ever made it home in one piece.

 

[margecat]

When I was teaching English here I had an elective "What not to say...." lesson for my classes every semester so they didn't find themselves in the same situation. You never saw more attentive students!

There's nothing like having a native speaker of a language laugh when you say something serious (so you think) in their language. Many years ago, I taught English to some students from Laos. My Lao wasn't good. I would take them to the local mall after lessons so they could learn about American culture--I'd show them around the stores and point out objects in English. I once pointed to something and they laughed. I had called the thng a frog. To be fair, whatever it was, the word did sound similar!

I also was self-taught in Spanish, and tutored people who wanted to learn English. I had to be VERY careful, as Spanish is a minefield of of common words, especially food words, used as x-rated slang. And the slang varied by country, making it even moe dangerous! Just don't say, "I want to CATCH the bus"...LOL