Playing Or Fighting

GalifreyGirl

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Hi All

I'm looking for some advice if possible?

I adopted my two bundles of joy in November. Very little is known about their background other than they are father and daughter (Tommy is around 4, Titch is about 1) and had been locked in a bathroom for most of their lives.

They are settling in wonderfully. Tommy is more confident and is such an affectionate boy. He will only sleep if he can feel part of me touching him. Titch is making massive progress and is now approaching us to be stroked.

My concern is that I think they may be fighting. It is usually Titch who initiates the fights, Nd she always goes back for more. There is never any hissing, or noise at all really, but it looks so violent and once or twice I've noticed some very small scabs on the back of Titch's neck. They're a bonded pair, they groom each other, they sleep cuddled up, they cry for each other when separated. But they also chase each other all the time and seem to do this wrestling thing almost constantly.

Is this normal? Any advice would be much appreciated as I am a first time cat owner.
 

lacy2000

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My cats also look super rough when they play. Fur flying, yowls of frustration, tackling and kicking each other in the face. But they arent in any real danger and still love each other. Some cats play rougher than others. You can try to interrupt it if it’s getting too rough, but just know they are probably playing.
 

susanm9006

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If they are sleeping together and grooming one another, they are friends and I am sure what you are seeing and hearing is play. It does get loud and rough sometimes but it is absolutely great exercise for both of them.
 

Gizmobius

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As long as there is no blood and no fur it is probably just playing. Here is a video of my two in a play session that may help...

View media item 420658
If anything, this helped me! My female kitten always makes such noise like this when my male cat initiates play but then she always comes running back for more when I separate them thinking he's being too rough.
 
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GalifreyGirl

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As long as there is no blood and no fur it is probably just playing. Here is a video of my two in a play session that may help...

View media item 420658
Thank you so much for this. It is really helpful. I tried to upload a video of my two but cant seem to get the file size right.
 

danteshuman

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Your kittens/teens are still young and like all teenagers they can get a little rowdy when playing .... and not respect boundaries. Rough housing teaches them how to behave in a "ow that hurts you jerk" kind of way. It is stuff they need to learn. They sound great together! I'm just happy if I see my boys sleeping together occasionally ;)
 

vyger

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I think a human equivalent is called sparing, like when people learning martial arts pair off to practice. Effective self defense fighting is something cats need to learn and practice because there are things that try and harm them in their environment. Learning the limits and capabilities of their built in weapons does take practice. All out battles are pretty hard to miss, among other things there is the defensive posture, the fur floofing up, the totally riveted attention and the obvious intent to do harm. Laying on your back with your feet in the air is not a defense posture but rather an invitation to play.
 

vyger

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Why were they locked in a bathroom? Where you given any background on it?

The bond between mom's and kittens is usually much stronger than between dad's and kittens since the mom's raise them. Often kittens when growing up will play attack their mom and she will tolerate it up to a point, like if they bite to hard and then she wacks them to let them know they crossed the line. It helps the kittens to learn the limits of play. Kittens growing up without a mom often have a hard time with "play" since they never learned manners and thus have boundary issues. The dads aren't going to be as nurturing as a mom but will still give education in playing. But there are always exceptions and surprises.
TinyKittens, a Canadian group, has an older feral cat that they call grandpa Mason who they discovered does an excellent job at fostering kittens. He tolerates all their antics and is very cuddly with them but every now and then he schools one if it goes to far. They have a lot of it on video. Here is a Google search with some of the videos.
grandpa mason - Google Search

And here is the short video they made of Mason, a bio of sorts.
 
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GalifreyGirl

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Why were they locked in a bathroom? Where you given any background on it?

The bond between mom's and kittens is usually much stronger than between dad's and kittens since the mom's raise them. Often kittens when growing up will play attack their mom and she will tolerate it up to a point, like if they bite to hard and then she wacks them to let them know they crossed the line. It helps the kittens to learn the limits of play. Kittens growing up without a mom often have a hard time with "play" since they never learned manners and thus have boundary issues. The dads aren't going to be as nurturing as a mom but will still give education in playing. But there are always exceptions and surprises.
TinyKittens, a Canadian group, has an older feral cat that they call grandpa Mason who they discovered does an excellent job at fostering kittens. He tolerates all their antics and is very cuddly with them but every now and then he schools one if it goes to far. They have a lot of it on video. Here is a Google search with some of the videos.
grandpa mason - Google Search

And here is the short video they made of Mason, a bio of sorts.
Thank you for your reply. Unfortunately we were given no further information on why they were locked away, or what happened to mum or the rest of the litter. We were told that they were very nervous, and that it would potentially take months before they were ready to come out of their cat room. In reality, it took a month before they were out and enjoying the space.

I think the reason I'm so nervous is I just can't judge whether their posture is playful or not. They can be fine with each other, and then spend an hour chasing, wrestling, chasing some more, have a quick rest and start again. Then once they're done they curl up together and sleep. I'm trying to upload a video or gif but for some reason I can't.
 
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