Pallina's Final Battle

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Antonio65

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On last Sunday afternoon Pallina was hospitalized for the fourth time in 22 days.
This time I picked the Veterinary University Hospital rather the her usual clinic, because their vets seemed a bit "shy" lately and didn't want to go further.

Pallina had a blood test done right away as soon she was admitted, and the reports showed her hepatic enzymes very high, and her bilirubin was 4.3 (the max is 0.26, in May it was 1.93). They also ran an ultrasound scan that showed a bad liver and an inflammated pancreatic area. So they hospitalized her and put her on IV with a med for nausea (Ondansentron).

I would receive daily update over the phone, and every night I was allowed 1-hour visit where the vet would talk to me about her case, and sometimes things were going fine, sometimes they weren't.

Pallina was released yesterday at 8 pm, because basically there is nothing they can do for her.
Her liver is compromised beyond recovery, they say, the causes are unknown.
They could have done a needle aspiration, but they thought it might have led to nothing. Whatever was the cause of her liver disease, it couldn't be treated, especially at this age. The ultrasound scan of her liver shows a right lobe completely different than the left lobe.

She was discharged with a prescription for an antibiotic and nothing else. No pain med, no anti-nausea med, no appetite stimulant.
This morning I went to a vet I know and asked him the favor to hand me some syringes with an anti-nausea med, and he gave me them for free. It's a med similar to Cerenia, but they said it stings less. Pallina didn't agree.

Pallina is fighting her last and final battle, but she's going to lose it. According to the vet at the university hospital it's a matter of days, probably within the end of the next week :bawling:

I can't believe it, I can't believe that in a few days my beloved cat will be at the Bridge.
I keep asking what I did wrong, or what I didn't do for her. Why did her liver failed? Did I feed her some wrong food in the past? Was it the suncream for her white ears that she would lick off? Was the HT that destroyed her liver or the meds that the vets were giving her because they didn't want to treat her with I-131?

She doesn't want to eat, I'm forcing her with a syringe. I'm also giving her all the supplements I have at home, double dosage. I still hope in a miracle, but I did the same with Lola, and I had no success...
At the hospital she would eat fine, or at least so they did tell me. I bought any kind of different food for her. So far nothing draws her attention. She just sleeps.
She's not as perky as she was at the university, she's slow, tired.

The doctor at the university told me not to insist to keep her alive, but my heart aches, and I don't want to let her go. Not again :bawling:

Please, any advice, please!
 

silkenpaw

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I am so sorry about Pallina. I had to euthanize my Frangi a couple of weeks ago, so I do know how you feel, everyone here does. It’s very hard to say goodbye to an old friend, you can’t imagine what life will be like without them but at the same time so difficult to see them suffer.

But, wonderful as our animal friends are, they do die before we do. The one thing we can do for them at that inevitable time is to make their passing easier. One of the wisest things I have heard about euthanasia is “it’s a thousand times better to be one day too early than one day too late.”

I will be keeping you and Pallina in my heart and thoughts. Let us know what happens.
 

jcat

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:hugs::hugs::hugs: I'm so sorry you're going through this and hope that Pallina's last days are peaceful. You did nothing wrong. At 17, she's an old cat, and her body is simply giving out.

When our last cat was dying of heart disease at almost 14, it was a question of letting him go before he was having more bad days than good ones. It's a tough time and a difficult decision, and my thoughts are with you.
 

PushPurrCatPaws

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oh Antonio65 Antonio65 , I am so sorry to hear this. This is heartbreaking. It sounds like her liver has really been struggling. Sometimes everything converges and the body just really struggles, and there is nothing more to be done. I know she is about 17 years old, and in some ways you are experiencing, I have been where you are with a sick, aged kitty. It is so terrible to go through. I know you do everything you can for your cats, they are so very dear to you! I am a bit shocked that the vet(s) did not send you home with any palliative care meds, like a pain med. My heart goes out to you and Pallina and your family...
 

orange&white

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I'm so sorry to read about Paulina's health. She's extremely lucky to have such a caring owner as you. There is nothing you did that could have prevented her health issues. Seventeen years is a good long life for a cat, longer than average. Your care and love have been the very best any cat could ever hope for. I'm sure she knows how loved she is, and has given her love back to you in return.

I'll hope for a miracle for Paulina as well. :grouphug2:
 

denice

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I am so sorry. You have done nothing wrong and you did not fail to do something. Our beloved companions go through the same process we go through, our bodies age and organs don't work like they used to. With cats we hear a lot about the kidneys being what fails but any organ can fail simply from age.
 

FeralHearts

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XOXO I'm so very sorry to hear this. My heart breaks for you.

I agree with everyone else. You did nothing wrong. In fact, you did everything you could do and then some.

She knows you love her. They feel this, they know it.

She was so lucky to have you. She's had such a nice long, well-loved life with you. XOXOXOX:grouphug2:
 

duckpond

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I am so sorry to hear about Pallina prognosis. I very much doubt that her illness is due to anything you did, or did not do. But i think its human nature to second guess ourself. We often do not know the why in situations like this, and that can be hard to accept as well. :alright:

She is loved, and well cared for, she is not facing this alone.. She knows this, and this is the main thing any of us can wish for, love and care, not to be alone. Take care of Pallina, and yourself. We will be here with you and Pallina. Hugs to you both! :grouphug:
 

Dickie

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Hello Antonio
I have been following the Pallina case, I never wrote because I had nothing new to contribute.
Today I am writing to tell you to please don't feel guilty, don't look for any more reasons for your illness, don't twist your head . You have made EVERYTHING HUMANLY POSSIBLE for the good health of Princess Pallina, it is incredible how much you have fought for her.
I hope for a miracle to happen.... but if not, enjoy your Princess Pallina as long as you can, and when necessary let her go in peace. Sometimes, not even fighting that hard, you can't go on.

Feel my full support for you , and my heart with your beautiful Pallina:hearthrob:
 

artiemom

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Oh Antonio, I am so sorry to hear this news.
:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:

You have to know, in your mind, that there is absolutely nothing you did or could have done to prevent this.
Sometimes it is just the aging process-- things just happen.. sometimes it is genetics.. who knows.. sometimes we just cannot prevent badness from happening..

There is NO ONE, in the world who could have loved and cared as deeply as you have for Pallina. She is loved...

It is so hard to deal with. It stinks, it is unfair, it is heartbreaking... but, that is what happens when you love-- and believe me, you LOVE.. with all your heart and soul..

Pallina has 17 years of LOVE, from YOU!!
You and Pallina have gone all over Europe, in order to find the Best Veterinary care for her~~~ who else would do that?????

My heart is breaking as I write this.. Please know we are all here for you.. all of us...
:redheartpump::grouphug::grouphug2: anytime of the day...


I know you are trying so hard for a 'miracle'.. but sometimes it is best just not to fight, but to just love, and let Nature, God, do what needs to be done.. sometimes we have to assist that direction. Listen to your heart.. not your head...

Make Pallina as comfortable as can be.. love her.. she knows you love her..

If syringe feeding is too much, then perhaps you may think it is 'time'.. If she is fighting it, or spitting out the food--then..... I know it is so heartbreaking...

I do not know how you feel about it, but, sometimes things are just out of our hands, and in the hands of God.... take his cue..

May you know that we are loving you, and Pallina... all of our hearts are breaking at this news...

With Love,
:redheartpump: :hugs: :grouphug: :grouphug2: :vibes:
 

Timmer

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I'm not sure there is much more that I can add to what everyone else has already said. You are a wonderful dad to your cats. 17 is a fantastic life. My heart aches just thinking about what you are going through. I'm still so very sensitive to having lost Timmer in January. I know what it is like to so deeply love someone and not be able to help them. Then to see them not their robust self, not even wanting to really be around us anymore and there is nothing we can do about it. Just give her lots of love right now.
 

foxden

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Antonio65 Antonio65
You have given Pallina so much of yourself.
artiemom artiemom says this so well...

Oh Antonio, I am so sorry to hear this news......[...]

There is NO ONE, in the world who could have loved and cared as deeply as you have for Pallina. She is loved...

It is so hard to deal with. It stinks, it is unfair, it is heartbreaking... but, that is what happens when you love-- and believe me, you LOVE.. with all your heart and soul..

Pallina has 17 years of LOVE, from YOU!!
You and Pallina have gone all over Europe, in order to find the Best Veterinary care for her~~~ who else would do that?????

My heart is breaking as I write this.. Please know we are all here for you.. all of us...
:redheartpump::grouphug::grouphug2: anytime of the day...


I know you are trying so hard for a 'miracle'.. but sometimes it is best just not to fight, but to just love, and let Nature, God, do what needs to be done.. sometimes we have to assist that direction. Listen to your heart.. not your head...

Make Pallina as comfortable as can be.. love her.. she knows you love her..
......

May you know that we are loving you, and Pallina... all of our hearts are breaking at this news...

With Love,
:redheartpump: :hugs: :grouphug: :grouphug2: :vibes:
:yeah:

I don't know of many owners who would do all the things you have done for Pallina and for Lola. My thoughts are with you at this difficult time
 
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Antonio65

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Dickie Dickie ,
I do appreciate your green candle, I really do.

I'll have fresh news in a few hours.

Yesterday the vet told me he had found what is very likely wrong with her, and he said it is treatable, provided she survives the surgery.

I'm praying that everything is going to be fine!
 
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