Non Socialized adopted cat

[Kieran333]

We adopted a 2 year old Siamese cat one month ago from a rescue org who told us our girl, Gabi, was socialized, sweet, and affectionate. When we met her she was in the back of her crate very shy but we thought she was just scared. We are new cat owners and did not recognize signs of a non socialized cat. Now that we've had her home for a month, she is still hiding all day, does not let us approach her, she does not purr or meow or rub her face or body on anything. She does play sometimes, she is active at night, she knows when feeding time is and comes out to eat. She occasionally approaches us but will not accept affection. She will eat a treat out of my hand but if I try to pet her while she is eating it she scurries away/turns her back on me. She has moments when we see what we think is her true personality but she disappears from 8 am to 5 or 6 pm every single day. She does not seek out patches of sunlight, she just started climbing her tree and looking out the window at night. We are using Feliway diffusers and VetriScience Composure treats. We have provided beds, blankets, scratching posts both vertical and horizontal and all textures (She will only scratch our bedroom carpet, she will not use a post), toys...everything we can think of. She was hiding under the bedroom dresser all day so we blocked it off and now she is under the bed all day. We are just heartbroken that we can't get close to her and earn her full trust. Any advice is welcome. Thank you.

 

[Elphaba09]

I would ask what sort of situation she was in before the rescue, but, since they lied about her socialization, they might not be completely honest about her past. We could speculate--I certainly have a couple of ideas concerning her previous life--but whatever it was, it is obvious that she was not used to three things: space, human attention, and being able to relax and play. You have started taking the right steps, and I am certain that you will have a sweet, affectionate cat when she is ready.

Firstly, can you isolate her to one room? She is likely afraid of having a lot of space to herself, so your kindness is actually causing her stress by overwhelming her. If you can, get her and all her stuff into one room and leave the door shut. Go in to sit with her, even if she does not come near you, and keep the area as calm as possible.You can spray or sprinkle the tree with catnip. If that does not work, try valerian. (It is extremely stinky, in my opinion, but cats tend to love it. Cats that do not respond to catnip will often respond to valerian.) After a couple of days, try to jingle toys. Wand toys are usually the best option for this application. If you need to, try using treats to get her to come out or to reward her when she comes out to play. Make sure to find some strong-smelling treats. I normally do not give my cats tuna, but when trying to convince a non-socialized or a feral that everything is safe, stinky tuna tends to do the trick. (My one cat only responded to raw beef, but he is a weirdo.)

If you have a crate or a carrier, you can put it in the room with her. She may want to cozy inside of it.

You can also give her the proper dose of calming liquid. Here is a link to the one that has worked the best on one of our wild girls. (Ask your vet, first, obviously. This is one that my vet suggested when we needed something stronger for our Juniper.) I just put her dose in a spoonful of some strong-smelling wet food to get her to take it.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003PQWU1S/?tag=thecatsite

After a few days or even a week, open the door and put up a gate if you can. (You can also just simply open the door since it seems like she is your only pet.) Start by moving her food dish just outside the door. Then slowly move her items out as she becomes more comfortable until they are where you want them to be in your house.

Eventually, she will start to approach you. When she does, do not force anything, and do not make any sudden moves. Let her lead how things go. Slow blink at her whenever she looks at you. (You can also spray some cat calming spray on your clothes. The smell will dissipate quickly for you, but she will be able to smell it.)When she is ready, you can slowly try to pet her after you let her smell your hand first. Or, if you are lucky, she will lie down close enough to you that you can slowly pet her. She will eventually figure out that it is nice.

Soon enough, you will have made her a happy house cat!

Some hints on "training" her. Do not spray her with water to get her as a punishment. Cats do not understand it, and it can lead to aggression and distrust. A better way is the clicker method paired with positive reinforcement. You do not even need a clicker if you can snap your fingers or get her attention some other way other than raising your voice. It has worked on various behaviors ranging from scratching furniture to aggression between cats.

My husband and I have 12 cats. We had three others, but my son took them when he bought a house because they were more bonded with him and his fiancee than with us. (We have also fostered many others.) All of our cats have been rescued from the street either as stray adults, feral kittens, and dumped kittens from a hoarder/bad breeder. Freya was a true feral of about 3 months when my daughter brought her home. She took nearly 5 years to become a cuddly cat! Haha! I doubt it will take that long for you! She sounds more like three of our younger babies, but not as bad. They were extremely skittish. Xanthippe still is, but, considering her and her brother's background, I am shocked only she is the only one who is taking a long time to relax. She recently started laying with her head on my foot and letting me pet her. It is a huge breakthrough!

How is she about going to the litter box?

 

[Kieran333]

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply! I so appreciate it! She is great with the litter box. No issues there knock on wood.

I did inquire about her life before adoption and the rescue org has not been forthcoming. I will try your suggestions. And thank you for confirming that spraying water is not the way to go. I've been doing tons of research, particularly about Siamese, and it seems that would be a negative reinforcement. And I will try Valerian. Gabi does not respond to catnip, silver vine, honeysuckle, or Feliscratch!

I have tried a carrier that she could cozy in, a cave bed, a box..she doesn't seem to want to be anywhere during the day except under a piece of furniture. Because she displays little to no confidence I am wondering if she was bullied by other animals when she was with the rescue org. My husband has taken to petting her when she is under the bed and she does allow this. Not all the time but he is good at reading when she wants to be left alone. I do not know if this is reinforcing that it is okay for her to hide? Or showing her that we are okay and she can enjoy being pet?

Giving up is not an option! We love this little girl so much. Thank you again. You've given me hope.

 

[Elphaba09]

I do not know if this is reinforcing that it is okay for her to hide?

You are very welcome! It is okay for her to hide. Petting her where and when she feels safest is a good way to expand the area that she considers safe. Please, keep us informed of her progress.

 

[fionasmom]

Rescues sometimes are less than forthcoming with the truth. I worked (briefly) with a dog rescue who gave all the dogs a tranquilizer before the rescue events and people thought that they were adopting calm, laid back pets.

I certainly don't have anything to add to Elphaba09 's advice. You must be disappointed, but this cat is very lucky that she found someone who is willing to work with her. I would even guess that she might be a rescue from an abusive situation given her age.

How To Help An Abused Cat Recover – TheCatSite Articles
How To Get A Cat To Come Out Of Hiding? – TheCatSite Articles

 

[susanm9006]

A month in the life of an adult cat really isnt very long at all. I think it way too early to make a guess as to whether she is in socialized, traumatized or just very cautious of new places and people. The fact that she comes near you even occasionally would give me a hint that she has had some socialization. She just may be fearful that she is going to get grabbed again and stuck in a carrier.

You are doing the right thing, giving her space and letting her hide until she is ready to come out. If she gets close, slowly reach out a hand and let her decide if she wants a sniff or even a head butt. Sitting on the floor in the room with her is also good since humans are much less threatening when we are closer to her level. Offering treats can also work with some cats.

Even though it may not feel like it by respecting her needs you ARE gaining her trust. It might take a few weeks or a few months until she is ready and her true personality starts to show but it will happen.

 

[Sylvia Jones]

I agree with susanm9006 it sounds like she just needs more time to adjust And I would bet it will be a matter of weeks not months Sitting or laying on the floor just talking is a great way to help them relax You can even read out loud it just the sound of your voice

 

[FeebysOwner]

Ditto on all of the above!! A 2 yo cat, with an unknown history, that is doing what your girl is doing is actually pretty good! It's unfortunate that she chose her safe space under a bed - but, there are SO many cats that do this. As long as she is eating/drinking/using the litter box, and you can spend time near her, sitting on the floor nearby and reading a book softly but out loud and not imposing on her, then let her be in what she now considers her 'safe zone'.

 

[Kflowers]

What everyone has said. Here is a possibility, that she wasn't intentionally abused. Her desire to stay under a piece of furniture may indicate an accidental trauma that occurred during the day. It's possible she was once in a room where a large object - a long board resting against the wall, a bookcase, a ceiling fan - fell. First she has to learn to trust the room - her current world - and the stability of what is in it, then she can open to trusting you.

 

[Cat McCannon]

Hiding is a natural reaction to being taken by strange people to a strange place with strange smells and strange sounds. This doesn't mean the cat wasn't socialized.

The unders and behinds (under the bed, behind the couch) need to be closed off. The cat needs to be given comfy cocoons instead, like a box with a soft blanket or a condo with rooms.

Unders and behinds are where cats hide when they feel small and hiding in unders and behinds keeps the cat feeling small.

You want to get your cat out in the open where it can feel like it belongs and the territory is theirs. Belonging and ownership builds a cat's confidence.

 

[susanm9006]

There is disagreement among some of us on the issue of blocking hiding places. Personally I do not suggest doing that unless the place the cat wants to hide is dangerous.

 

[TardisDance]

This sounds so much like what the county shelter did to us when we adopted my cat Sango last year in March. They said she was from a hoarding situation and was treated for an upper respiratory infection. They never said she were under socialized and being new cat owners, we had no idea what a hoarding situation cat would be like.

She hid in our bathroom for 2 months, then another 2 months in a cat cave in our living room. She hid behind the toilet constantly, so what I did was setup a small enclosed cat bed next to the side of the toilet and slowly add pillows behind the toilets to sort of prop up the cat bed out of the hiding area. Then I slowly inched her food bowl and water further away from the toilet. Maybe something similar can be applied here too? I also used tons of treats and started playing with wand toy once she was more comfortable. Initially she would only bat at the toy and accept treats from her bed but again inching stuff slowly out helped.

We did the whole Feliway plug in thing and bought 4 of them and they never really did much. We tried composure treats too but she ate it once and never again. I think I used the Vermont Naturals brand and I guess those were yucky tasting.

It will take a lot of time and patience. Believe me, there were times in the beginning that I wanted to bring her back to the shelter but I knew they would have a hard time adopting her out and it’s a kill shelter so I just couldn’t do it.

By the way, Sango’s improved a ton and even follows me around the house and loves to sleep on my lap. Every little improvement is a huge win and so rewarding. I know there may always be things about her that may never get better.

 

[fionasmom]

Posted in the wrong thread?

 

[Cat McCannon]

There is disagreement among some of us on the issue of blocking hiding places. Personally I do not suggest doing that unless the place the cat wants to hide is dangerous.

When talking about blocking unders & behinds, I mean places where cats go to hide that make it difficult for their guardians to get to them. Places cats go because they feel small and keep them feeling small.

Blocking unders & behinds doesn't mean blocking cats from healthy places where they can feel secure, such as covered beds, rooms in a cat condo or their carrier. We want unders & behinds blocked off because if they get injured or panicked and retreat where we can't get them out without difficulty, it could be life threatening. We don't want cats hiding in under or behinds if we have to evacuate in an emergency.

Behinds & unders are where cats feel small and lack confidence. Cats retreat there because they feel like prey and in my experience, unders & behinds reinforces that feeling.

When we first took Belle in, I made a mistake and left the door open to a room where we were storing unpacked boxes. The room was nothing but unders & behinds. Belle had lived as a feral on a farm for at least two months before she was trapped. She was settling into our household with confidence until I made a mistake and left open the door to a storage room with unpacked boxes. Lots of unders & behinds. Belle got in there and reverted back to her feral ways. I put food in the room, but she wouldn't touch it. I finally had to go in and search. (She was about 6-8 months old and underweight. She was in no condition to stop eating.) When found, her eyes were wide and wild and when I picked her up, she bit me deep, something completely out of character for her.

In all my years of having cats (or other pets), I've never known a situation where blocking off the unders & behinds and offering confidence building alternatives, was not beneficial.