Needing some advice and a bit of hope regarding my new cat and resident cat.

hannahe01

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Hi y’all. I’ve never posted here before but I am REALLY in need of some advice and (hopefully) some hope in regards to my current situation.

A week ago my fiancé and I adopted a 1 1/2 year old tortise cat named gwart and she’s the sweetest most affectionate thing. We got her so she could be a companion for my 1 1/2 year old cat named mochi. And also because she was so cute and oh so sweet.

introducing them went okay. We kept them seperate for the first few days, swapped scents, used feliway, tried to feed them on opposite sides of the door (although my resident cat didn’t partake as he’s particular about where his food bowl goes lol) and when we actually physically introduced them it was relatively fine. No fighting. Light swatting and a few hisses at first but nothing major. Although My resident cat was/is stressed and didn’t eat much for the first three days. Fast forward to now a week later and there’s no hissing or swatting at all. My resident cat is eating again and I even saw them playing for a short time this morning.

my question is this: why do I still have so much anxiety? We keep them seperate while we sleep or go to work and then let them interact while we’re home and monitoring them. My resident cat will barely play with me whereas before he played every day with me for at least an hour. Now he seems to be totally uninterested in playing at all. He follows the newbie around, and watches her every move basically. She wants to play all the time and wants my attention constantly, although I do give my resident cat more because I want him to feel like He’s still the head of the house.

Like I said they’ve played a bit but I’m sad because I miss playing with mochi. I loved playing with him every day after work. I am afraid that adopting this new cat is going to cause his personality to change or him to become depressed and reserved. I know it’s only been aweek and I know this will take time but I can’t shake the anxiety. :( I feel guilty for sometimes thinking bringing her home was a bad idea because she’s the SWEETEST. I just miss how mochi and I used to play/interact.

siiiiiigh. Any opinions?


I’ve also attached photos of them for cutes.
 

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hannahe01

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I should also add I’m an anxious person in general. I’ve been SO stressed this week because getting a new cat integrated is a lot of work. I’m nervous that mochi will Resent me and our relationship will never be the same
 

susanm9006

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It sounds like the two cats are doing really well together, especially for just a week, and each is enjoying having a playmate. Sometimes when that happens with young cats like your two, they are so excited to have another cat in the house that their humans get temporarily shoved to the background. But usually this is temporary, the novelty wears off a bit and they return to their usual cuddle patterns with you and other household members.

I certainly wouldn’t feel guilty, it seems this adoption has been a good thing for both of them. And I think in another couple weeks you will feel better about the adoption as well.
 
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hannahe01

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It sounds like the two cats are doing really well together, especially for just a week, and each is enjoying having a playmate. Sometimes when that happens with young cats like your two, they are so excited to have another cat in the house that their humans get temporarily shoved to the background. But usually this is temporary, the novelty wears off a bit and they return to their usual cuddle patterns with you and other household members.

I certainly wouldn’t feel guilty, it seems this adoption has been a good thing for both of them. And I think in another couple weeks you will feel better about the adoption as well.
I hope so!! He’s definitely a bit stressed still and doesn’t always want to play when she wants to play. He’s def been chilling under the bed a lot more often. The first few days were ROUGH and I felt so bad for bringing home an “”outsider”” when he was so happy before lol. Things are def better than they were and they were never really all that bad to begin with. Just my anxiety and stress over him not eating and me being tired and having no idea how to introduce cats
 

Moggielady

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We brought home a kitten 3.5 weeks ago and our resident cat stopped played until a couple of days ago, and even now she is only playing a little bit, but I was so glad to see it. I think it just takes time. I've been stressed too and feel your pain but things do progress and change day to day and looking back now a week seems super early in the process to me, even though I'm not that much further ahead than you! Wishing you very good luck with it all.
 

ArtNJ

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Its almost never love at first sight with adult cats, even young adults. Two 1.5 y.o.'s are likely to become friends, but its likely to take some time. During the process, they are often very vigilant of the other cat, and don't want to play/cuddle with the human -- its like they are on guard duty. This is all "on schedule".

If you haven't had two before, you may need to come back and ask about rough play when they really fully start going at it. Just for your peace of mind, since you might think the play looks too rough or dangerous even if its actually totally normal. Also keep in mind, that if one is a little bigger/smaller, or one is more/less feisty, the play may not be perfectly equal, one might hiss and run/hide now and then, and you might have some concerns about that too. But its all fine, these two are headed for a true friendship. Its very common with cats this young, but something to celebrate nonetheless.
 
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hannahe01

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Also when should we *stop* seperating them when we go to bed/work. How soon is too soon? And how the heck do I keep her out of mochis food bowl! Mochi is a grazer and eats throughout the day. I’m getting tired of constantly putting his bowl up and taking it down. Any better ideas ?
 

susanm9006

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I think it’s fine to stop separating them at night now and it may help if they have the opportunity to Be together 24/7. Give it a try one night and see how it goes.
 

ArtNJ

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And how the heck do I keep her out of mochis food bowl! Mochi is a grazer and eats throughout the day. I’m getting tired of constantly putting his bowl up and taking it down. Any better ideas ?
Its many times easier if both cats eat the same food. I would need a very specific reason like obesity or a medical diet to fuss with each getting different food. There are many members here that do manage separate foods quite nicely, but I think it may be literally impossible if one is on unlimited all day grazing and one isnt.
 
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hannahe01

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I think it’s fine to stop separating them at night now and it may help if they have the opportunity to Be together 24/7. Give it a try one night and see how it goes.
Will do! Thanks :-)
 
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hannahe01

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Its many times easier if both cats eat the same food. I would need a very specific reason like obesity or a medical diet to fuss with each getting different food. There are many members here that do manage separate foods quite nicely, but I think it may be literally impossible if one is on unlimited all day grazing and one isnt.
Yeah I’ve realized that it’s pretty impossible and I don’t really want to drop $150 on a microchip cat feeder right now SO I guess I’ll make the switch with her food now as well. That way it doesn’t matter if they nibble on each others food.
 
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