My Sweet Maverick: the Love of My Life

[kittkatt]

I've been dreading this day, but sadly, it has come.

I had to have my Maverick put to sleep today. I can't go into details right now because I'm too incoherent: I can barely right because I'm bawling so hard that I can't see straight.He was the most sweetest, loving cat I've ever had, and it broke my heart to have to make the decision, but it was the humane thing to do. I just hope he can forgive me.

I love you so much, Maverick. I hope you're at peace now and no longer suffering. You will always be in my heart.

RIP, sweet baby.

Mommy will never forget you.

Maverick: February 1995 - Jan. 4, 2010.

 

[wellingtoncats]

RIP Maverick!

for you

 

[xocats]

I am so sorry.

Rest in peace beloved Maverick.

 

[carolina]

Oh God, I am so Sorry

RIP Maverick

 

[kittkatt]

Oh God this is just killing me.

I keep thinking did I do the right thing? Could more have been done to maybe keep his alive longer? The vet said that his kidneys & liver were strating to shut donw and he was showing signs of juandice and he was starting to become dyhydrated - even though his heart was still strong. He was barely eating anything anymore and was staring to become weak: there wasn't much left to him but skin & bones. But he still look as if he wanted to live: I could still see life in his eyes. I don't know if I did the right thing or not! I couldn't stand to see him suffering anymore.

Oh God Maverick - please forgive me! I'm so sorry!!

 

[xocats]

Maybe this will help you....
when I adopt my cats,
I make the promise to them that I will not let them suffer,
if there is no hope of long term recovery.
Your decision to let go, came from a place of pure, selfless love.

Your grief has just begun,
your baby is at peace.

 

[kittkatt]

Originally Posted by xocats

Maybe this will help you....
when I adopt my cats,
I make the promise to them that I will not let them suffer,
if there is no hope of long term recovery.
Your decision to let go, came from a place of pure, selfless love.

Your grief has just begun,
your baby is at peace.

That's a promise I always make to my babies too. When I took him in for his latest treatment last week I promised him that if there wasn't any improvemt beifore the next treatment was due, i would not let him go on like that nymore. He had one or tow "good" days, then started to decline again. I think I know in my heart that I did what was right for him - and the vet confirmed it - but oh God it hurts so much!

Maverick was my comfort when things were bad: he was always there to love me and comfort me. He used to burrow under the covers with me at night to comfort me, and tuck his head in the crook of my arm while holding him and give me kitty kisses when times were hard. I feel so lost without him.

I have ten other kitties in the house, but it still feels empty.

Oh Maverick, I hope you understand why I had to let you go.

 

[mbjerkness]

It is never easy to let our pets go, even when it is the right choice.

 

[otto]

I am sorry for the loss of your beloved Maverick. I assure you, you did the right thing. You do not need to apologize to Maverick, and there is no forgiveness needed.

Letting him go in dignity, with your loving arms around him, was your final most important gift to him.

He is free and healthy now, waiting happily for you at the Bridge. And he is in Good Company. Squeaky, Baby, Sissy, Bibbs and Ootay will welcome him, along with many other beloved souls.

It hurts like heck though, I know.

 

[jcat]

I'm so sorry you lost your baby, and your heart is aching.

You did what you could for him, and spared him suffering, which is the greatest gift you can give. RIP, Maverick.

 

[alleygirl]

Rest in peace Maverick, you beautiful special boy

 

[kittkatt]

Thank you so much everyone for caring & understanding. It means so much to me - more than you'll ever know.

I could barely sleeep last night, adn when I did, I kept having nightmares of my precious Maverick asking me why I let him go. I know that's probabyly stupid because I'm sure he's happy to not be suffering anymore. But this guilt is just eating at me. What IF it wasn't his time yet? Who am I to "play God" and make that decision????

I'm trying to stay busy so I won't think about it so much, but everywhere I go I see him in the house. There are pictures eveywhere and soooo maby memories of him. When I went to feed the kids their breakfast I started to prepare Maverick's special food for him, then realized he wasn't here. I went to get some laundry ready to wash, and started thinking about how he used to love laying in the laundry basket. I went to get a sponge from under the sink, and realized that he liked sleeping under there too. He's just everywhere in this house that he love so much. He was so happy here.

I wish this pain would just go away. I love him so darn much.

 

[ldg]

The pain will take time to heal because you loved him so much.

I'm so sorry Tiff - so, so, so sorry.

Maverick

 

[rosiemac]

Tiffany, you had Mavericks best interests at heart, and by that you made sure he wasn't going to suffer anymore and gave him a new quality of life over at Rainbow Bridge

When the time is right and you both see each other again at the bridge, he'll thank you by giving you the biggest head bump you've ever known

MAVERICK

________________________________________

 

[pookie-poo]

Please don't tear your self apart over your decision to end his suffering. Maverick is resting in God's hands now, so he knows that your decision was one made with love. It is a burden that we must take on when we surround ourselves with ones who's lives are shorter than ours. In time, the pain will fade, and the happy memories will take it's place. It will be 10 years for me in April, with my soul mate Spooky. Reading and replying to these posts rip the scab right off the gash in my heart. It hurts so much to come here, but I know that you, with your fresh, deep, and overwhelming pain, need as much compassion and understanding as we can offer. ~~Hugs~~

 

[white cat lover]

You will always second guess yourself, it's human nature.

Play happily over the Rainbow Bridge, Maverick.

 

[kittkatt]

Originally Posted by Pookie-poo

Reading and replying to these posts rip the scab right off the gash in my heart. It hurts so much to come here

That's why I rarely ever visited the RBB forum - because it tears me up so much to come here and see everyone's pain.

God only knows I've had to face this myself more than once, and readiing about how much it hurts just brings back painful memories. I knew I'd have to come here again some day, but oh my God - how I was dreading that day.

Maverick was my "soulmate" too, PookiePoo, so I know exactly how you feel about your Spooky.

God only knows how much we love all our furkids, but there's only one soulmate that comes along in a lifetime, and there's no replacing them.

My entire body aches this morning from crying so much.

When I first got up, I thought I had a better grip on everything, but when it started to sink in again, I lost it again - especially when I went to feed the kids their breakfast. I keep looking around the house for him like he's still here.

It doesn't seem possible that he's gone - especially after 15 years. How could those years have gone by so quickly? It seems like just yesterday that he came into my life. We went through so much together: he & Gabriel were my "rock" when I moved to Texas and brought them with me, and they gave me the strength I needed when I was going thru hell with the abusive ex. If it weren't for them, I dont think I would have gotten thru that horrible time. I know that probably sounds crazy, but it's the truth. They (especially Maverick) gave me the strength I needed to keep on going. The only thing that makes this more bearable is the fact that I knew Maverick wasn't going to be with me much longer and I had time to prepare myself (if that's even possible). I've been grieving for several weeks now already.

I keep thinking of that movie Million Dollar Baby and how Hillary Swank was begging Clint Eastwood to end her suffering by helping her to die. I can understand why he didn't want to do it. I can't even imagine how people who have to make the decision to unhook the machines from a loved one who's dying can do so without feeling that horrible guilt of wondering if they did the "right" thing.

My poor Gabriel is wandering around the house looking for his buddy. He & Maverick grew up together. I'm sure he's grieving, too.

I apologize for rambling. I guess I just need to get it out.

Thanks so much everyone for being there to listen.

 

[ruthyb]

I am so sorry hun for your loss. You did the right thing and Maverick is no longer in pain. R.I.P Maverick and play freely and happily at the rainbow bridge.

 

[aileen06]

I'm sorry for Your loss. Rest in Peace Maverick.

 

[catsknowme]

Maverick was your "sphinx" kitty, the cat who was so close to your heart, just like Joey was for me. I have lots of other kitties, but no cat who was "my" cat - who was so intuitive to me, who was so bonded with me. JC is the quintessential "family cat" - he adores me, but he is strongly bonded with everyone,too, a real treasure to have, but my heart is still grieving very strongly for my little Joesters.
You did the right thing, as did I for Joey. I could have prolonged Joey's life, and it tears me up how confident and trusting he was when the vet was injecting him - whatever I decided for Joey, he was content with. Such utter trust and devotion---and it was such a shock, so unexpected for me, he was so young, only 5 years - finally mature for a Manx - but I couldn't bear to let him suffer. We are all born to die, we can only hope that we are given the peaceful, dignified passing that we have given our beloved kitties. At least, I keep reminding myself of that, but my tears still fall - and it's been 18 days now