My Scooter

[baxtersmom]

I lost the last of my 3 cats last night. Scooter was the funniest kitty. He came to me as a tiny kitten who had been tossed away in the woods near my sister's house. By the time I got him he was nearly dead. He had the worst upper respiratory infection and could barely breathe. I got him to the vet immediately and he survived. A few months later we got a puppy and the two of them became fast friends. They would chase each other around the fireplace in the middle of our living room all day and night, rolling and swatting. His early illness left him deaf in one ear. I named him Scooter because of the way he would scoot out of the room any time a stranger came over. He'd crouch down and scoot away, close to the ground. He always held his head sideways because of the hearing loss. Any time he found me in bed he would come into the room, jump in bed with me and lay on top of my head. He'd bite my hair and stick his nose in my mouth to sniff my breath and make sure it was me. He always had the loudest, craziest meow. Like he was talking to me. He always answered me when I called his name or asked him if he was hungry. He never really cared for the other two cats I had, Pepper and Peanut. They were here first, mother and daughter. Scooter avoided them both most of the time. Sometimes he would chase Peanut because she was smaller then him. Pepper was big so he did his best to stay out of her way. He was a beautiful cat, white with several black spots. The spots on his back made a smiley face. Two eyes and a smiling mouth. I wish I had a picture of the smiley face. He hated strangers. Any time we had a visitor he would scoot his way to our bedroom and hide under the bed. If they were staying with us for awhile he would eventually get the nerve up to come out at mealtime. He loved it when my husband would grab his scruff and pull his ears back. He would just purr and purr and keep coming back for more. A few months ago I noticed that he was getting skinny even though he was always ravenous. I just thought it was because he was getting old. One night in August we woke up and found that Pepper had passed away during the night. She was 18 or 19 years old and lived a good life. Around the same time I noticed Peanut had a lump on her face, under her eye. She was put on antibiotics for what was thought to be an infection. Not long after she was diagnosed with mouth cancer. She passed away Sept. 1st. With all of this going on I failed to notice just how skinny Scooter had gotten. He was constantly hungry. Even though we only had one cat left we were still having to buy the same amount of cat food because he ate constantly. Because of his weight loss and appetite I did a lot of research and came to the conclusion that he had hyperthyroidism. We took him to the vet for an exam and bloodwork and they confirmed my suspicions. He was put on Methimazole. He also caught a bad cold at the vet's office. He hadn't had a cold of any kind since he was a tiny kitten until he went to that vet. Poor baby's nose was so stuffed up. I was continuously cleaning the mucus off so he could breathe. He also had terrible diarrhea. The vet gave us a medication for it but it didn't seem to help. Each day I would take him into the bathroom and run the hot shower to steam up the room, hoping to clear his nose. I also noticed that he was eating his litter. He finally got over his cold and seemed to be doing a bit better. It all happened so fast. Yesterday morning he ate like a pig and drank tons of water then went to sleep behind the couch. I don't know what happened or why it happened but by the time I realized he was dying there was nothing I could do but comfort him. I'm so confused now. Did I wait too long to treat his hyperthyroid? Had it done too much damage already? I thought he was starting to get better. I'm so completely broken right now. This has been the worst year of my life. I lost my Mom last September, then 2 of my cats passed away, I almost lost my dog when the vet gave him medication for his prostate and it caused his kidneys to fail, my Dad passed away in September, exactly a year after my Mom, and now Scooter is gone. My heart is broken.

 

[Kflowers]

I am so sorry for your losses. That is more than anyone should have to endure in that amount of time. They love you gave will remain with them always, and their love for you will be your strength now and forever.

 

[Furballsmom]

Gracious sakes, honey - you've been through enough for multiple people!!
I'm so sorry this all has happened to you and in such a short time.

I think that you did everything humanly possible for Scooter, and Scooter knew, and he loved you for it, I promise.

RIP sweet babies, you are now in a place of sunshine, peace and calm.

Maybe this will help you
Grieving

 

[baxtersmom]

Gracious sakes, honey - you've been through enough for multiple people!!
I'm so sorry this all has happened to you and in such a short time.

I think that you did everything humanly possible for Scooter, and Scooter knew, and he loved you for it, I promise.
RIP sweet babies, you are now in a place of sunshine, peace and calm.

Maybe this will help you
Grieving

Thank you for that thread. It helped a lot. My poor dog is so confused today. He keeps looking for Scooter all over the house. I wish I knew how to help him. The two of them used to compete for my affection all the time. If I was petting one of them the other would come up and insist I pet them too. At dinnertime they both would be at my feet begging for scraps. Even going to the bathroom makes me sad. Scooter used to sleep in our bedroom and any time I went to the bathroom and pushed the door shut behind me, I would see a little white paw pushing the door open so he could come in and get some lovin'. I have so much guilt for not realizing that he was going to die. I hate that his death wasn't as peaceful as it would have been had I had him put to sleep, but then I'm sure I would feel guilt if I had made the decision myself. I really thought he was doing better. I keep questioning how I didn't know he was that sick. Once his cold cleared up I had visions of him gaining back some of the weight he lost and being the crazy kitty he had been. I was planning on getting the medicine that you put on their ear so I didn't have to pill him twice a day. So many what ifs.

 

[Furballsmom]

It's so difficult, it really is.

Do you have a blanket or something of your baby Scooters you could give to your dog to sleep with?

I'm seeing that music is not just helpful for cats, but for dogs as well.

 

[les26]

Oh I am so so sorry that you have experienced all of these losses of your loved ones, it just doesn't seem fair....you did all that you could for Scooter and more, and it is normal to question things and think "I should have noticed this" or "I should have done this" but that is just the grief speaking, it will try to control you and your thoughts for awhile but with time you will realize that you did all that you could and more for him, sometimes these bad things just happen, but you loved him and he loved you and had a happy life after you saved him from sure death, but he is fine now, just fine, and you will see him again one day and it will be wonderful.

"Their last breath on Earth is their first breath in Heaven"

I hope that your heart heals a bit more each day, God Bless you.....

 

[Diana Faye]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I lost my mom this summer, and a month later I lost Irving unexpectedly. I still wonder if I missed something, being depressed over my mom, but there was nothing obvious to tip me off. I know the ache of wanting to be the one to be their for them, but I do feel like they can be so devoted to us that they stay strong for as long as they can.

Scooter didn't want you to worry, and if it was in his power to do so he wouldn't have wanted you to go through that pain again, so soon after the rest. He wants you to remember him as he always was, whole and happy to be with you. And even though we can't see our beloved pets, they are never far from our hearts.

 

[di and bob]

Often, when it is their time, no matter what we do it is to no avail. We can never stop death from coming, and we'll never stop the heartache because we love them and shared our hearts and our life's journey with them for a while. You have gone through much in such a short time, time is the only thing that will distance you from the pain and dull the sharp edges of grief. Please keep in mind, that not ONE of those who have passed would ever want to bring you such pain. They all loved you, they all want for you to go on into the future and carry their love in your heart. In this way they live on through you. Take one day at a time, don't try to process your feelings, don't dwell on the should haves, could haves.. They change absolutely nothing and only bring heartache. Don't try to compartmentalize your feelings into neat little packages following the 'stages of grieving'. Yes, there are stages we all go through, but there may be some that are skipped, some gone through again and again. Don't ignore your feelings, but don't let them take over your life either, you have to actively 'work' to get through this, you can't let death destroy your own life, because life is all too fleeting and it is what WE make it.
You have many precious memories from happier times, use those to bring your sore heart comfort, right now find things you enjoy doing, like a walk in a beautiful park, or a drive in the country, or helping at your local shelter to socialize kittens, and seek the joy and goodness in life as they would want for the one they love so much, as you would have wanted for them if you were the first to go. Thank God they had you in their lives, thank God you had them in yours. You are indeed rich beyond compare for having known them and their love. To have never met them at all would have been unthinkable.
I found that giving a small donation to my local shelter, or donating food and toys, in my loved ones name helped me to feel a little better about myself. Reach out to others like this site, I have found that trying to comfort others brings comfort to myself, I have been there, I can bring empathy because I have been through the grief that losing loved ones can bring. I am still trying to fight death and the sorrow it brings to my soul. I'll keep you all in my thoughts and prayers. My heart goes out to you...... RIP dear Scooter. You will always be remembered, you will always have a secure place in a loving heart. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you all meet again!

 

[missy&spikesmom]

Oh....I am SO sorry for all the losses you have gone through in such a short time. How awful for you! It is so human of us, after we watch them go through struggles, all the what ifs, what else we missed, or could have done? Oh, they do make us worry and feel so sad. I think at a point in time, we just absolutely have to not keep asking those questions and I too, have done this so, so often! One thing I am quite sure of though, is every one of them loved you so very much and they still do. It's just that we cannot see them now, although we WILL see them again one day. And all of them will come running to you, to let you know they never, ever forgot how very much you did, to make them feel so loved when they were here with you. Wishing you so much comfort in your sadness....

 

[aliceneko]

I'm so sorry for all you have been going through lately. Sending lots of love and prayers your way.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Rest you gentle, Scooter, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

Oh, my Darlin, what a time you have had. I am so very, very sorry. This is what I have learned over a fairly long lifetime...Love never dies, it simply changes form and continues on, still Love. Each and every one of your loved ones is only a whisper away from you now, still loving you as you still love them. Love abides.

Love abides.