My Precious Snowball

[CatLover49]

Hello
Alot of you know me and my cat snowball..he passed away on July 8th?/2020...The vet had to put him to sleepHe was loosing weight and they did xray cause abdomen was very tender
And that's when the vet found out my babys lungs were deteriorating very badly
He was suffering
I miss my Snowball so very much
I hurt every day
.every minute
I had him cremated privately
Have his ashes in my bedroom drawer
I cannot sleep in my bedroom now
I have this feeling
Im not comfortable in my bedroom
Can someone tell me why that is???

And my son got me a kitten to help me get through the grief and from being alone
Please someone I need answers
Why cant I sleep in my bedroom
Since he passed n since his ashes are in my drawer

 

[FeebysOwner]

I am so sorry that you lost Snowball. I haven't placed any of my cats' ashes that close to where I sleep - I guess I must have instinctively known it would be unsettling. Is there somewhere else you could place them for a while? That is what I would do, and see how you feel down the road.

Embrace your new kitten and know that Snowball loved you so much that he would want you to take care of this kitten the way you took care of him.

RIP little Snowball.

 

[CatLover49]

I am so sorry that you lost Snowball. I haven't placed any of my cats' ashes that close to where I sleep - I guess I must have instinctively known it would be unsettling. Is there somewhere else you could place them for a while? That is what I would do, and see how you feel down the road.

Embrace your new kitten and know that Snowball loved you so much that he would want you to take care of this kitten the way you took care of him.

RIP little Snowball.

 

[CatLover49]

Ive been crying for days
It hurts so much
I had him 12yrs almost..liking a week
This hurts so bad

 

[FeebysOwner]

He may not be with you physically, but he will always be with you in your heart. He will help you heal over time, and would want you to get to the point that you can remember everything about him with a smile. It just takes time. But, know that is what he wants for you.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Darlin, I've already said all those things that I usually say, so I'll just add, it has only been 10 days. JUST TEN DAYS! Of course, you are grieving. Of course, you are having a hard time sleeping in your bed with his ashes in the same room. Of course, you are still crying. Had he been a human, NO ONE WOULD EXPECT you to be doing anything differently, not even you. This is the hardest part of it, and all you can do is get through it day by day, minute by minute.

Do try to embrace this new little one, as hard as it might seem right now. He will never be Snowball, but he will be someone who can make his very OWN place in your heart. He needs you as much as you need him. I promise you, Snowball approves.

 

[DreamerRose]

I'm so sorry. You've lost your best friend. Let yourself grieve until you find some peace, and it's not so sharp and painful.

 

[Jewely]

Oh CatLover49 , I am truly sorry you had to pts your beautiful Snowball. My heart goes out to you. Did Snowball sleep with you at night? That might be another reason it’s so hard to sleep in your bedroom (if he did).. Take your time, and allow yourself time to grieve. Please share things with us if you’re able

 

[di and bob]

I can tell you why that is, that room or bed, has a very strong connection with your precious Snowball. A strong enough connection that your poor heart can't take it. I did the same thing after my Chrissy died. The bed brought back memories of her snuggling with me, of chasing her brothers off every night, of happiness....I could not sleep in that bed for weeks, I had to drug myself with Benadryl to sleep at all. I kept thinking of her, outside in her grave, alone and cold and I couldn't stand it.
My advise is to move those ashes to a safe place and put her picture next to them. A shrine to her memory. To be remembered and loved is a great honor. Somewhere where you won't see it constantly, but near enough to visit.
I remember resenting my other cats because they were alive and my Chrissy was not. But they did so much more then I ever knew, they forced me to live in the present, feeding and caring for them distracted me, even if for a short time, from my grief.
That precious kitten you have is bewildered by your grief. It desperately needs someone to love and care for it. It needs you, and believe it or not you need it. It can help you through this by giving you something to live for, to provide a distraction your poor heart needs. Don't ever worry about 'replacing' your beloved Snowball's place in your heart or life, you will always have a secure place in your heart and soul for him. He will always be near and there for you.
Like a mother with several children, you would be 'adding' love to your life. To your heart. Each love is completely separate, completely individual. Snowball would be honored to know that he taught you enough about a cat's love that you would add to his own and let it shine forth by bringing about a new love forming for that sweet, innocent baby. Pour your attention and time into learning about that new little one. Into learning to love again. Snowball is at peace, he will help you. it helped me get through the worst time in my life. It can help you too.......

 

[Krienze]

After CiCi died, I had a really hard time sleeping by myself for some reason. Since my step dad is on the road, I laid with my mom the first week (silly, I know, since I'm a grown woman) but I can't explain in proper words the anxiety and sadness I felt. I didn't want to be by myself. I almost want to say it felt like fear, but I couldn't tell you what I was afraid of.

I think eventually, like me, you will be able to sleep in your bedroom again. You just need time to grieve! It's only been a few days so it's normal. There is nothing wrong with you.

Your son sounds very sweet and kind to bring you a kitten =) I know it's hard. It was hard when we adopted Jasper & Mia after losing CiCi and our dog, Jack. I look at it like this, of course they are NOT replacements. Nothing could replace any animal, but they are taking CiCi and Jack's spots in our homes and while at first that thought made me sad... I realized that that is 100% what CiCi and Jack would have wanted. We rescued them, they would have wanted us to give a home to two babies who needed it and so that's what we did.

Try to embrace the kitten, you may be surprised at how much light the little furrball brings you.

I'm so sorry for your loss though... my heart is with you

 

[Antonio65]

I'm very sorry for your loss, CatLover49 , I fully understand your grief and pain, because I can feel mine after over three years.

If Snowball's ashes might be the reason for your lack of sleep, would you try to move them in another room, even temporarily, till you feel ready to have them back with you?
I'm sure Snowball won't be mad at you for moving him to another room for a few days, he loves you and knows you need some rest. Then, when all is settled, you will reunite again.

Hugs to you and Snowball

 

[CatLover49]

Oh CatLover49 , I am truly sorry you had to pts your beautiful Snowball. My heart goes out to you. Did Snowball sleep with you at night? That might be another reason it’s so hard to sleep in your bedroom (if he did).. Take your time, and allow yourself time to grieve. Please share things with us if you’re able

Yes he slept on the bed every night
I feel so lost and empty

 

[di and bob]

There is an empty spot in your soul. But Snowball left behind a part of his own to help replace the one he took from you for comfort. You will add on to it over the years, never to replace it because that can never be, but to build upon. That tiny kitten's love will eventually help to take away some of the pain. We cannot sustain such pain and sorrow forever, it is against life's meaning itself. The pain will always be there, but it will subside to a dull throbbing as you learn to live with it. The human soul can endure much, but the strength of love and life will win in the end. Because that is life itself.....

 

[CatLover49]

There is an empty spot in your soul. But Snowball left behind a part of his own to help replace the one he took from you for comfort. You will add on to it over the years, never to replace it because that can never be, but to build upon. That tiny kitten's love will eventually help to take away some of the pain. We cannot sustain such pain and sorrow forever, it is against life's meaning itself. The pain will always be there, but it will subside to a dull throbbing as you learn to live with it. The human soul can endure much, but the strength of love and life will win in the end. Because that is life itself.....

At times im fairly ok in a sense but empty
Then other times it hurts so bad
That I ache inside..and cry like I am now
And just hurt

 

[di and bob]

Don't feel alone, I did that for a long time, years. I finally realized that my little girl, who loved life so much, would never want me to.live that way. Just as I would never want her to be so sad for so long if I was the first to go. She will always be a part of my life, our souls are bonded by love.

 

[strider rose]

sorry for your loss hun .. sending love and hugs your way