My kitten confuses me reg. being handled. How to proceed?

[else]

I have two kittens who are 8.5 weeks old, same litter, male /female. We've had them for a week and they seem happy here. Sorry it's long, trying to give you a clear picture. I hope I'm just being a worry wart all for nothing!

We picked these two kittens because they were very well socialized and seemed so affectionate and sweet. The boy still is, he loves to snuggle and seeks us out, wanting to be on our laps /cuddle etc. The girl did in the beginning, seemed to love to be on our laps and totally good with being petted. Now she seems to become very independent and is mostly cuddly only if she's getting sleepy. If fully alert she does not want to be touched even if not playing. Sometimes she seems to be afraid of my fingers if I try to touch her, yesterday I had to lure her to come and she tried to tap my fingers as if she didn't know what they were, and worried, but I was able to get her to eat kibble from my fingers. Later on worried again and same today. Then I left the house for 15 minutes, came in and they both came to greet me, meowing loudly and wanted to be pet, tail straight up! Other times too she seems fine, on my lap sleeping (mostly if I put her there) and purring and enjoying being pet, also getting real snuggly licking my fingers like she's wanting to nurse. But now sleeping next to me rather than on me.
I don't understand why she's getting so stand-off-ish and refusing to be touched when she was so well socialized plus loving to be cuddled on a lap.
What's the best way to handle her? We're hoping she'll come around again and become a lap cat who will enjoy cuddling with us.
Also, do I discourage or allow her to lick me? I prefer that she doesn't lick us a lot when she's older for sanitary reasons. But right now I'm allowing some since it might be partially affection and I want her to bond.
Here's a picture from a few minutes ago, and now that they're both asleep.

 

[maggie101]

My cat peaches only likes to be touched when she wants to be touched. She is queen.. My cat coco crawls all over me,kneads her paws,major lap cat. Maggie likes to be petted but not picked up. Their personalities are very different as they get older. As kittens, my cats slept on me. As they got older,end of bed. She will be a lap cat when she wants to be a lap cat. It is best to pat her from behind,not over her. Peaches favorite spot is her back by her tail. Maybe she likes to be brushed? Do you clip their claws?so she will sit on you

 

[else]

Yeah, I know as adults they can be so different from each other, but I was thinking a cuddly kitten would be a cuddly adult. Maybe not then?
I do not clip their claws, I've just trained our past cats to use scratching posts and that has worked well as far as scratching. I feel like when I clip claws they and we become less careful and then I have to continue to clip, with some cats getting ticked off and me getting stressed every time. So I prefer not to.

 

[maggie101]

Your kittens are adorable! Right now,Coco is staring down at my tablet her neck on my shoulders. . I admit your kittens are young to already be showing off their personalities. It is interesting to watch them grow up. Have fun!

 

[maggie101]

Everytime I try to clip cocos claws, she licks my finger so I have to take her to a vet. She was born on my porch, disappeared 5 weeks old, came back a year later rubbing on the porch window. So maybe she never learned how to take care of herself

 

[JulietteTruong]

I have two kittens who are 8.5 weeks old, same litter, male /female. We've had them for a week and they seem happy here. Sorry it's long, trying to give you a clear picture. I hope I'm just being a worry wart all for nothing!

We picked these two kittens because they were very well socialized and seemed so affectionate and sweet. The boy still is, he loves to snuggle and seeks us out, wanting to be on our laps /cuddle etc. The girl did in the beginning, seemed to love to be on our laps and totally good with being petted. Now she seems to become very independent and is mostly cuddly only if she's getting sleepy. If fully alert she does not want to be touched even if not playing. Sometimes she seems to be afraid of my fingers if I try to touch her, yesterday I had to lure her to come and she tried to tap my fingers as if she didn't know what they were, and worried, but I was able to get her to eat kibble from my fingers. Later on worried again and same today. Then I left the house for 15 minutes, came in and they both came to greet me, meowing loudly and wanted to be pet, tail straight up! Other times too she seems fine, on my lap sleeping (mostly if I put her there) and purring and enjoying being pet, also getting real snuggly licking my fingers like she's wanting to nurse. But now sleeping next to me rather than on me.
I don't understand why she's getting so stand-off-ish and refusing to be touched when she was so well socialized plus loving to be cuddled on a lap.
What's the best way to handle her? We're hoping she'll come around again and become a lap cat who will enjoy cuddling with us.
Also, do I discourage or allow her to lick me? I prefer that she doesn't lick us a lot when she's older for sanitary reasons. But right now I'm allowing some since it might be partially affection and I want her to bond.
Here's a picture from a few minutes ago, and now that they're both asleep.

Gah they’re so precious I cannot take it.

 

[else]

Your kittens are adorable! Right now,Coco is staring down at my tablet her neck on my shoulders. . I admit your kittens are young to already be showing off their personalities. It is interesting to watch them grow up. Have fun!

Thank you Maggie!

 

[else]

Gah they’re so precious I cannot take it.

Thank you so much, they sure are adorable I think!

 

[arr]

I got two kittens, a brother and a sister, last summer. Like yours, they both seemed very cuddly at first. The boy remained very affectionate and is a lap cat, but the girl isn’t. Once she started growing a little, she wanted no part in petting and laps. She doesn’t like being held but if we sit near her, she likes her face scratched and her belly lightly rubbed if she’s very relaxed. She is affectionate in her own way. She rubs up against our legs, purring, and sleeps at our feet. She asks us to play with her and that is her way of bonding with us.

Whatever they act like when they are tiny isn’t necessarily how they will be once they start growing and become adults. Also, in my personal experience, boy cats are more affectionate than girl cats. Perhaps it’s not true for everyone but all my super cuddly cats throughout my life have all been boys.

 

[game misconduct]

I have two kittens who are 8.5 weeks old, same litter, male /female. We've had them for a week and they seem happy here. Sorry it's long, trying to give you a clear picture. I hope I'm just being a worry wart all for nothing!

We picked these two kittens because they were very well socialized and seemed so affectionate and sweet. The boy still is, he loves to snuggle and seeks us out, wanting to be on our laps /cuddle etc. The girl did in the beginning, seemed to love to be on our laps and totally good with being petted. Now she seems to become very independent and is mostly cuddly only if she's getting sleepy. If fully alert she does not want to be touched even if not playing. Sometimes she seems to be afraid of my fingers if I try to touch her, yesterday I had to lure her to come and she tried to tap my fingers as if she didn't know what they were, and worried, but I was able to get her to eat kibble from my fingers. Later on worried again and same today. Then I left the house for 15 minutes, came in and they both came to greet me, meowing loudly and wanted to be pet, tail straight up! Other times too she seems fine, on my lap sleeping (mostly if I put her there) and purring and enjoying being pet, also getting real snuggly licking my fingers like she's wanting to nurse. But now sleeping next to me rather than on me.
I don't understand why she's getting so stand-off-ish and refusing to be touched when she was so well socialized plus loving to be cuddled on a lap.
What's the best way to handle her? We're hoping she'll come around again and become a lap cat who will enjoy cuddling with us.
Also, do I discourage or allow her to lick me? I prefer that she doesn't lick us a lot when she's older for sanitary reasons. But right now I'm allowing some since it might be partially affection and I want her to bond.
Here's a picture from a few minutes ago, and now that they're both asleep.

the last pic looks pretty bonded and full of trust to be sleeping that way next to you. the licking i take as a sign of affection or grooming from graycie even though at times it does lead to a few bites/ nibbles with her trying to initiate rough housing type play. i wouldnt worry much over her being not as cuddly as the boy her personality is just different is all. plus some cats are just like that like"i'm the boss" all things my way my terms

 

[else]

Everytime I try to clip cocos claws, she licks my finger so I have to take her to a vet. She was born on my porch, disappeared 5 weeks old, came back a year later rubbing on the porch window. So maybe she never learned how to take care of herself

It's amazing she found her way back! How sweet!

 

[else]

I got two kittens, a brother and a sister, last summer. Like yours, they both seemed very cuddly at first. The boy remained very affectionate and is a lap cat, but the girl isn’t. Once she started growing a little, she wanted no part in petting and laps. She doesn’t like being held but if we sit near her, she likes her face scratched and her belly lightly rubbed if she’s very relaxed. She is affectionate in her own way. She rubs up against our legs, purring, and sleeps at our feet. She asks us to play with her and that is her way of bonding with us.

Whatever they act like when they are tiny isn’t necessarily how they will be once they start growing and become adults. Also, in my personal experience, boy cats are more affectionate than girl cats. Perhaps it’s not true for everyone but all my super cuddly cats throughout my life have all been boys.

Thank you arr!

 

[else]

the last pic looks pretty bonded and full of trust to be sleeping that way next to you. the licking i take as a sign of affection or grooming from graycie even though at times it does lead to a few bites/ nibbles with her trying to initiate rough housing type play. i wouldnt worry much over her being not as cuddly as the boy her personality is just different is all. plus some cats are just like that like"i'm the boss" all things my way my terms

Yep, I've definitely seen that with cats before. I was hoping she'd be more laid back than that, but that doesn't mean she won't be a great cat, she will still (already is) be very loved.

 

[else]

I guess I'll just have to wait and see how they both develop. Like I said, it's confusing at times because she swings back and forth, but never being aggressive in any way. A little bit ago she was sitting on top of the couch back when I approached, she was looking straight at me and she allowed me to meet her nose to nose touching! That was pretty sweet! Then a bit after that she was eating, I went over and started gently stroking her while eating and she started purring. My little Buttercup! And now they're sleeping again, he on my lap and she right next to me.

 

[game misconduct]

Yep, I've definitely seen that with cats before. I was hoping she'd be more laid back than that, but that doesn't mean she won't be a great cat, she will still (already is) be very loved.

everything will be ok then and both will proceed to take over in time all your favorite spots to sit along with your bed and pillows

 

[else]

everything will be ok then and both will proceed to take over in time all your favorite spots to sit along with your bed and pillows

 

[Suru]

i think kittens think everything is a game. Maybe it’s also a girl kitten thing to like hide and seek more than the boys. My male cat, even as a kitten never liked to hide under couches as part of his play routine, neither will he run away when you walk towards him. This new lady kitten of mine though? I don’t bother walking towards her to pick her up, it’s guaranteed that if I did so, ahe would dart for the under couch expecting me to chase after her. She’s not scared of me or anything, I could go over and grab her out and she would be happy as a clam, so I guess it’s just part of her play routine. What I normally do is ignore her when she runs off, and being the curious thing she is, it doesn’t take a minute before she comes back wondering why no one went after her.

Sometimes she mistakes my hands for a toy, which will get her a little hiss from me. She can mostly catch it herself doing it now. If a kitten doesn’t want your hand near, she will likely back off and hiss, or walk away, so I don’t think she’s uncomfortable with your hands there, most likely she just wants to play with you.

Kittens are so hyperactive, I would cuddle with my older boy (who I can move around and resposition as I please), but cuddling with my energetic little one even when she’s sleepy is such chore, who knows when she’ll be recharged and bouncing over my face, lol. Also being so small, there’s really not much there to cuddle

 

[else]

i think kittens think everything is a game. Maybe it’s also a girl kitten thing to like hide and seek more than the boys. My male cat, even as a kitten never liked to hide under couches as part of his play routine, neither will he run away when you walk towards him. This new lady kitten of mine though? I don’t bother walking towards her to pick her up, it’s guaranteed that if I did so, ahe would dart for the under couch expecting me to chase after her. She’s not scared of me or anything, I could go over and grab her out and she would be happy as a clam, so I guess it’s just part of her play routine. What I normally do is ignore her when she runs off, and being the curious thing she is, it doesn’t take a minute before she comes back wondering why no one went after her.

Sometimes she mistakes my hands for a toy, which will get her a little hiss from me. She can mostly catch it herself doing it now. If a kitten doesn’t want your hand near, she will likely back off and hiss, or walk away, so I don’t think she’s uncomfortable with your hands there, most likely she just wants to play with you.

Kittens are so hyperactive, I would cuddle with my older boy (who I can move around and resposition as I please), but cuddling with my energetic little one even when she’s sleepy is such chore, who knows when she’ll be recharged and bouncing over my face, lol. Also being so small, there’s really not much there to cuddle

Interesting! What a funny kitty! It is so nice too that they all have their different personalities. It makes them so special and it can be so entertaining to watch them.