My cat keeps going to another home!

beckiboo

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My beloved barn cat Will is from the neighbor's farm. He had been living here for about 2 months before we realized it. While my friend Judy doesn't mind, I think her son would like Will back, since he is so nice. But Will is free to come and go, and has spent the last 6 months or so here.

I think he needed a place where he could be top male, and they have too much competition, as they have a lot of barn cats, only 2 of which are female.

When cats are allowed to roam, they seek out what is best for them. I say let the kitty go visit the older couple, and maybe even let them have the cat, if they can afford the vet care. How nice in a world where cats are euthanized for lack of a home, that this kitty has two families who want her!

If they end up keeping her, at least you will always know where to go to visit her!
 

booktigger

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I have a similar problem with my male cat. He comes home for his meals (although i generally have to get him for his tea cos I think he should be fed) and sleeps at home 99% of the time (although i do sometimes have to go and pick him up. His 'other home' is my next door neighbours house! My mum thinks i should let him live at my neighbours house, but he loves me and comes home most of the time. He doesnt go as much now, as he is on a diet so my neighbours supposedly watch him for eating food, as they free feed. Also, my neighbours only take their cats to the vets when they are ill and dont care if their animals are overweight, so i am glad he is my cat. The daft part is he just goes and sleeps on peoples beds, he doesnt seek attention. I originally thought he did it cos my housemate was too loud and he preferred the piece and quiet, i can only assume he does it now to get away from the fosters!! I would love him to be more of a stay at home cat, but it is just not him, he lived on the streets for 3 years so cannot cope with being indoor only (had to try it for 10 days when he had an op last year, and he got depressed). On the other hand though, my neighbours cat always comes to my house and will eat food at my house that she wont touch at home!! The reason she loves me so much though is cos she is tempremental and i dont care, i always give her a fuss and a kiss and play with her, which her owner wont cos he is scared of her.
 

janine&lily

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i wouldnt let anyone take my cats into their home,i love them to much to. I dunno how people can just say "just let it go she obviously wants to be there" what about the poor owner left behind,its unfair to expect her to just let her cat go elsewhere.In my opinion its unfair on you,you shouldnt have to share your cats.
 

babybee

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It is hard, but if she is a good safe place at the other house then I would just let her go over there to visit especially if she comes home as well. My sisters cat did that with the neighbours who had a little daughter. He would go over there every day, sleep with the little girl, and in the evening he would go home to my sister's. The neighbours loved the cat so did the daughter, and didn't bother them at all that he went over there on a daily basis. When my sister found out, she woulnd't let him go outside for a while hoping that he would stop, and when he was allowed outside it would be on a leash. He was miserable. I have never seen a cat so depressed. He didn't want to do anything, kept sitting by the door, and when he had the leash on, he always wanted to go towards the neighbours house. In the end my sister had to give in. It was hard, but he was happy, and he did come home every day.
I really don't think there is any way to stop this unfortunately.
 

petnurse2265

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If you let your cats go outside it is very hard to control where they go, that's a fact of life.
 

booktigger

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Originally Posted by janine&lily

i wouldnt let anyone take my cats into their home,i love them to much to. I dunno how people can just say "just let it go she obviously wants to be there" what about the poor owner left behind,its unfair to expect her to just let her cat go elsewhere.In my opinion its unfair on you,you shouldnt have to share your cats.
I hate my cat going to my neighbours house, especially when they go to bed before i get round and they havent thought to check their house so he has to sleep there. Unfortunately, keeping him in isnt an option, so unless my neighbours keep their door shut, which they arent going to do, i dont get a choice. My main prob is i live in a back to back house, so we dont have a back door, never mind a garden, so it is either let them out on the street (dead end street, and there are only 8 houses so safe) or keep them indoors. Another thing we have to remember is that cats are still independent creatures and as such you dont have as much control on them as you would another animal. I take on older cats, and although they will tolerate a collar, they wont tolerate a lead. It is unfair on the owners, it is why i cant just have one cat, but cats will be cats.
 
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tracey65

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This is the first time I've been on this website and can't believe the response I've got from you all. Thank you all so much for taking the time to respond, and although some of the replies were not what I wanted to hear (i.e. you can't do anything about her second home) it was nice to hear other people's similiar situations and realise that it's normal to feel rejected by my little girl and I've got to put up with her wishes. It's certainly right what they say about cats : 'We do not own cats, they own us!'

A BIG THANK-YOU AGAIN for your replies - very much appreciated.
 

cyberkitten

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Indoor cats are happy cats!! Keep her indoors and you won't have to worry about her being kidnapped, visiting, being run over by a car, hit by strange ppl - plus outdoor cats live an average if 5 yrs , it is three times that for indoor cats. If she is used to going outside, it may take awhile for her to adjust but hopefully she will.

I encountered this prob in reverse - a kitten who was not well cared for by neighbours who came to my home all the time. I finally talked to the neighbour and they saw the benefits in keeping her in, esp in cold weather and became much better cat caregivers!
 
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tracey65

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I have two other cats and not a very big house so could not cope with all 3 of them being indoors. The only consolation is that she comes home here on a regular basis so she's not disowned me completely.
 

talon

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Just think of it as your kids going to the neighbors house to play.
 

beckiboo

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Originally Posted by janine&lily

i wouldnt let anyone take my cats into their home,i love them to much to. I dunno how people can just say "just let it go she obviously wants to be there" what about the poor owner left behind,its unfair to expect her to just let her cat go elsewhere.In my opinion its unfair on you,you shouldnt have to share your cats.
Each situation is different, of course, but if an independent, intelligent cat decides to visit or move elsewhere, it deserves that choice. Of course an inside only cat will never have the option. But as she describes this cat, she won't stay in only. It is very difficult to feel someone prefers another's company to your own. But what a great cat, to see someone mourning, and be there to help them cope...by eating treats and getting extra attention!

And Tracey, I hope she decides in the long run to stay with you...but truly, cats are such independent souls. It is nice you will let her be happy rather than try to force your will on her in this matter.
 

booktigger

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CyberKitten said:
Indoor cats are happy cats!! Keep her indoors and you won't have to worry about her being kidnapped, visiting, being run over by a car, hit by strange ppl - plus outdoor cats live an average if 5 yrs , it is three times that for indoor cats. If she is used to going outside, it may take awhile for her to adjust but hopefully she will.
QUOTE]

The cats in question are actually indoor/outdoor so dont fit into what you have said. Some cats just cannot be kept indoors, i have one of them, he lived on the streets from being about 8 to being about 11 (and that was very close to a busy road) and even after 3 years of being in a house he cannot cope with being in it for more than 9 hours. My cat unfortunately has slept in my neighbours house for the past 2 nights as my neighbour cant hear him getting into his house, and doesnt think of checking his bedroom before he goes to bed anymore. I have deliberately put a collar with a loud bell on, plus a name tag, so he makes loads of noise when he walks!!
 

janine&lily

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at the end of the day the cat belongs to her nobody else she pays for its food its vets bills etc so the cat should be with her.
 

nano

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Originally Posted by janine&lily

at the end of the day the cat belongs to her nobody else she pays for its food its vets bills etc so the cat should be with her.
It's not an issue of emotions or sentimentality, it is a matter of the law.

I can't speak for Wales or UK or other places, but in my area a cat wandering around alone outside without a collar (registration tag) is an unattended cat. That means I can call animal control or I can bring the cat into my home as a "found" cat.

If I call animal control, they come capture the cat and the owner must appear at the center to reclaim it. If their paperwork isn't in order or if the cat's vet work wasn't current, there will be fines and additional fees that can add up to several hundred dollars. If no owner appears or the owner is unable to pay, then the cat proceeds on a schedule to be euthanized in a certain number of business days. If by some miracle it is one of the <<1% of cats deemed strong adoption candidates, and there is a vacancy in the local public program, it is transfered to a separate area to await adoption by the first adult deemed fit to pay the small adoption fee. That person would acquire registration and be recognized as the proper legal owner.

If I decide to bring it into my home as a "found" cat then it's my responsibility to post flyers, canvas the neighborhood, make advertisements in the newspaper, get the cat scanned for a microchip and anything else to try to locate the owner. If no owner steps forward, then I can take steps to adopt it for myself. I get it current on vet work, explain the situation (with evidence of my attempt to locate owners) and pay the modest registration fee. That cat now legally belongs to me.

I'm not trying to talk tough and maybe what I say doesn't apply elsewhere, but letting your cat go outside unattended in my area is leaving a lot of things to chance.
 

sharky

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Originally Posted by Talon

Just think of it as your kids going to the neighbors house to play.
that is how i view my visiting "kids" from the neighbors
 

elizwithcat

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Originally Posted by Nano

It's not an issue of emotions or sentimentality, it is a matter of the law.

I can't speak for Wales or UK or other places, but in my area a cat wandering around alone outside without a collar (registration tag) is an unattended cat. That means I can call animal control or I can bring the cat into my home as a "found" cat.

If I call animal control, they come capture the cat and the owner must appear at the center to reclaim it. If their paperwork isn't in order or if the cat's vet work wasn't current, there will be fines and additional fees that can add up to several hundred dollars. If no owner appears or the owner is unable to pay, then the cat proceeds on a schedule to be euthanized in a certain number of business days. If by some miracle it is one of the <<1% of cats deemed strong adoption candidates, and there is a vacancy in the local public program, it is transfered to a separate area to await adoption by the first adult deemed fit to pay the small adoption fee. That person would acquire registration and be recognized as the proper legal owner.

If I decide to bring it into my home as a "found" cat then it's my responsibility to post flyers, canvas the neighborhood, make advertisements in the newspaper, get the cat scanned for a microchip and anything else to try to locate the owner. If no owner steps forward, then I can take steps to adopt it for myself. I get it current on vet work, explain the situation (with evidence of my attempt to locate owners) and pay the modest registration fee. That cat now legally belongs to me.

I'm not trying to talk tough and maybe what I say doesn't apply elsewhere, but letting your cat go outside unattended in my area is leaving a lot of things to chance.
Where are you located? Are you requited to register your cats? There is no registration fee here that I know of. All the vet tells me thaf if I don't use rabies vaccine, they could report me. But even then I suppose I could always tell the vet I don't have the cat anymore.
 

elizwithcat

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Originally Posted by janine&lily

at the end of the day the cat belongs to her nobody else she pays for its food its vets bills etc so the cat should be with her.
Then she should keep the cat at home. If you were going around your neighborhood trowing out money, would you expect people brought these money back to you?
 

janine&lily

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all i believe in is that if a cat is yours it should be in ur house not someone elses,its only an opinion no need for people to get nasty. All i did was express my opinion
 

elizwithcat

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Originally Posted by janine&lily

all i believe in is that if a cat is yours it should be in ur house not someone elses,its only an opinion no need for people to get nasty. All i did was express my opinion
I wasn't being nasty. I simply stated that if you want your cat to be in your house, then you should have the cat as an inside cat. If you let your cat out, you can not control what he/she is going to do. And you can not control what other people are going to do to the cat.
 

petnurse2265

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different cities require a license. In Denver itself your pets are required to be licensed, but some of the suburbs of Denver you are not required. The only way to find out for sure is to call animal control for your city.
 
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