Mishka

[mishmash]

I'm devastated. I had to say goodbye to my beloved Mishka (16 years old). She started getting sick in November, and after months of different treatments for what one vet thought was an aggressive URI, I watched her go from an outgoing, loving, chubby girl to an immaciated and tired cat who just wanted to spend all of her time alone.
I gave up on seeing this vet when she then developed a prominant lump on her nasal bridge and I brought her to a hospital in hopes of getting a second opinion. The second vet was of the mind that Mishka was suffering from an abscess from a tooth infection, so she gave me more antibiotics to try, as well as appetite stimulants to help get her back into condition for an eventual procedure. That was 3 weeks ago. The meds didn't help and she just lost more weight. Yesterday (Friday), I dropped her off for her follow-up appointment to hopefully at least drain the abscess and see what the next step was. This vet (the owner of the hospital) told me he'd seen a case like her's before and said it was most likely a tumor that would progress. There was nothing else we could do for her and she was too weak to undergo any procedures.
Mishka was miserable and tired and I was at a complete loss. She wasn't herself anymore. She hadn't been herself since December. Her quality of life was poor and getting worse. So rather than bring her home just to watch her further waste away until the inevitible, my husband and I decided it was kinder to let her go. I wasn't ready for that. Deep down I knew this would happen, and I thought I was mentally prepared. I KNEW in my gut that it was a tumor and that this wasn't simply a URI or a tooth issue.
I feel lost without her. She was my constant companion since 2007 and we had such a strong bond. She was my girl and I miss her terribly. I feel like I let her down. Sorry if this post is poorly written or things don't make much sense. I'm still trying to process all of this.

 

[Furballsmom]

Hello
I don't think you let her down at all, and she wouldn't want you to feel that way either, I promise.

RIP sweetheart, you gave so much of yourself in love, and hopefully your person will be able to reach a point of peace in the future.

 

[movinintime]

I am deeply saddened to hear this. I agree so much with Furballsmom in saying, she gave so much love to her owner. I really know everyone has or will go through this very hard time and only pray you have the strength to realize she is at rest, and will always be, waiting for you in the afterlife at Rainbow Bridge.

 

[di and bob]

You tried so hard, and sweet Mishka knew this. There comes a time when life becomes too much of a struggle, when you exist instead of living and enjoying life. I think Mishka was at that point. Somehow you found the strength to end that pain, it was found through your love. I went through much the same with my dear Burt, and I let him die at home. Something I will regret, he suffered at the end, and I never wanted that for him.
No matter how it ends there is always regret and guilt and second-guessing yourself. It comes with grieving. You couldn't let that precious girl suffer, you did what was necessary to keep her from that. There is no way to ever prepare your heart for the end. When it comes it completely shatters your soul. Time is the only thing that helps to rebuild, one day at a time.....
The bond you built up over those 16 years will always be with you, nothing, not even death can break it. "Death can not take that which never dies". She will be forever as close as your thoughts and prayers. She would never want to bring your heart pain, just as you would never want her to feel such pain if you were the first to go. She loves you too much and would only want to live on through you now, through your precious memories and you finding joy and happiness in living once more. She took a little bit of your heart with her when she went, but she left a part of her own to replace it. Build upon it with new loves, it helps her own to grow and bloom, to be perpetuated into infinity.
My heart goes out to you. As one who has lost so many of these perfect little family members, I know what a toll it takes on your soul. It never gets easier to lose one, you never get over something like this, you learn to live with it, to build a new life's order without them. But the new path they follow will forever parallel your own, tied together by the love you shared. The greatest honor you can receive is to be loved and remembered after you are gone. Mishka is greatly loved, so is at peace.....RIP dear Mishka. You will be dearly missed, you will forever have a secure place in loving hearts. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!

 

[les26]

I am so sorry that you lost your little friend, it is heartbreaking and especially hard when you are really not in control of the situation, sometimes this is how it has to play out and end, sadly. But you did all that you could and she knows that, it sounds like it was the right thing to do but it is oh so hard to do, but she is fine now, just fine, no more tumor or pain, and when you see her again one day it will be a joyous reunion.

"Their last breath on Earth is their first breath in Heaven"

I am so sorry for your loss, I hope that your heart heals a bit more each day, God Bless......

 

[betsygee]

Please know that you didn't let her down. I know it's hard to not second-guess yourself in situations like this, but please try not to beat yourself up. You gave her many years of love and good care and then did everything you could to help her when she got sick.

You did something that was painful and devastating for you in order to save Mishka from more pain and suffering. My heart goes out to you.

Rest in peace, beautiful Mishka.

 

[solomonar]

Fighting for your brother in arms is ultimate proof of devotion and friendship.
We all lost the final battle, we all hope we would not.
Hearts are broken, but we win eternal memories, for Love has no end.

Tears for Mishka the Cat and hugging her brave human and caregiver.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Rest you gentle, Mishka, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

You did not, for one minute since that day in 2007, let Mishka down. Not once. And especially not now, when the two of you fought side by side for so long. Nor is there any shame in losing that fight which we ALL must lose someday. You both gave it your best. And now Mishka is in That Place Where All Things Are Know, a place that knows no pain, or fear, or illness. She is whole and filled with joy. Her only sorrow is your sorrow, for she knows that your parting will be so brief in the eyes of Eternity. And she has sent her love for you, translated and purified into Love, back to keep you company. It will be there until, in the fullness of time, you join her. Because Love abides. Always, forever, Love abides.

 

[southernbama]

I'm sorry you had to help your kitty cross the bridge. I also had to do the same thing 4/17/2020 due to cancer. Mine was 15 years old. It really stinks when you are in a routine of caring for them, giving them medicines, making their special food, trying to comfort their pain, and then they are gone and your have change how you spent your days. Every little thing reminds you of them.

 

[di and bob]

A beautiful reminder.....

 

[movinintime]

Very beautiful! Thank you southernbama for this very special reminder. Hard to read if you've ever lost a loving kitty as it makes me tear up just reading this. Sorry I sound like a creampuff today but it is just something re animals that makes me care more, as so many folks can be deceptive or have ulterior motives. Our pets do not and for this, I love them even more.

 

[Furballsmom]

Our pets do not and for this, I love them even more.

 

[southernbama]

Very beautiful! Thank you southernbama for this very special reminder. Hard to read if you've ever lost a loving kitty as it makes me tear up just reading this. Sorry I sound like a creampuff today but it is just something re animals that makes me care more, as so many folks can be deceptive or have ulterior motives. Our pets do not and for this, I love them even more.

Please don't apologize for tearing up. Our pets love us unconditionally. I've lost many pets but seems like it hurts more as I've gotten older. I still have 4 fur babies, all rescues. I sure am missing my sweet calico.

 

[neely]

My sincere sympathies go out to you on the passing of your beloved, Mishka. She may be gone but her memories will live on in your heart forever. RIP sweet angel, you are running pain free at the Bridge now.